GOLD HERE! STORY TIME! RANDOMNESS INCOMING! BRACE FOR IMPACT! REVIEW TIME ETA...NOW!

Sora: YES THAT HAPPENED! YES IT WAS INSANE!

Aura: Its okay. It was Ensis disguised as Fluttershy, that's what was happening XD

Flutterlikeanangel: Just ignore the troll hater.

Captain: MOAR VIDEOS! OH BOY XD

Glimpse: I know how it feels to be turning into Pinkie XD

BADA55: PINK MATCHES YOU WELL BLADE XD

Tail: Krain will not move XD

Meteor: I don't THINK THAT IS POSSIBLE!

BaconLettuce: THIS IS MY INSANE SIDE, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Christian Wolf or whatever it is: No.

Ted: DUH, OF COURSE SHE DOES? CUPCAKES MUCH?

Spike: I couldn't finish watching Cupcakes, but I strangely like Smile XD

HMMMMM, what should this chapter be about...*looks at TV* MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I got an idea! Get ready: Gold, Unknown, Sora, Red, Alex and his kids and Night!

GOOOOOLD THE FOOOOOOOX PRESENTS...

COOOOOOOOMPLETE CHAOOOOOOSSS, THE GOOOOOOOD KIND

Chapter 12: Tartarus's Kitchen

It was yet another normal day in Ponyville. The sun was shining brightly on the small town, the season of summer arriving. Gold was just playing with a paddleball on Twilight's couch, cursing to himself whenever he missed the ball.

"At this rate, I'll never beat the high score!" Gold said, trying again but failing.

"Well, what's the high score?" Unknown asked, randomly appearing under the couch.

"Well...um...three." Gold said, only able to hit it once before failing.

"You can't even hit three?" Golden Dawn said, walking into the library with her father (Alex) and brother (Metal Shard).

"Oh please, I bet you can't hit one." Gold said, motioning the paddle ball toward Dawn.

Golden Dawn took the paddleball from his hands and started hitting the ball with the paddle at a very fast pace, making a red blur. Eventually she missed and gave it back to Gold.

"There. I got about 729 hits. Have fun." Golden Dawn said with a laugh.

"Greeeeeat. Anyways, what are you and the family doing here, Alex?" Gold asked.

"Well, we just needed to pick up a few books. Oh and also, your mail carrier must have forgot to give the mail TO you, I found it on the ground in front of the door." Alex said, going to Gold to hand over the letters.

"Speaking of which, Gold, where is Twilight? Is she 'training' with Celestia again?" Unknown said, referring to the horrible sight Gold had accidentally stumbled upon a few chapters ago.

"Please, don't ever remind me of that again. And, I don't know, I think she was invited to a competition or something." Gold said, throwing the paddleball behind him.

"Hey, library party people, have you seen Pinkie? I've been wanting to enhance my fourth wall breaking skills with her." Sora said, walking in.

"Surprisingly, I have not seen her. And I can see everything." Unknown bragged, getting out from under the couch.

"She must have been invited to that competition too." Gold said, throwing some of the mail behind him that wasn't his, but was Twilight's.

"Whoa, lots of people in the library today. Has anyone seen Applejack? I was informed that I should be helping with the farm today." Red said, adding another person to the volume of people in the library.

"I was supposed to be helping as well. I want to get paid. Doing it for the money," Night said, walking in from behind Red.

"Why don't you go find out yourselves!" Gold said, while trying to open an envelope addressed to him.

While the group kept talking to themselves, Gold ripped open the letter for him, with Golden Dawn bouncing on top of his head. How she got up there, no one and no pony knows, but let's continue with the story. Gold started reading the letter to himself, becoming very intrigued. He then nodded to himself and got everyone's attention.

"Hey everyone, listen up!" Gold shouted, using his hands to make himself louder, and everyone listened. "Okay, so this letter is inviting me to go onto some sort of cooking game show. Don't know why or how they got this to me but oh well, this is the land of talking technicolor ponies. Anyway, the show requires me that I get five others for this competition, and since there are five of you in front of me, you are all joining me."

"Cooking...game show? What the heck is that?" Red asked.

"It's exactly what it sounds like, duh." Unknown said. "What's this show called?"

Gold read the letter again and looked back up at the group.

"Tartarus's Kitchen."

The group of six were now in a kitchen that had blue tiles adorned in almost any empty spot where kitchen supplies and appliances weren't. The six themselves where standing in the kitchen all in a line, all wearing a chef's shirt with blue stripes on the arms.

"Oh great, we are wearing clothes." Night said, pinching his shirt and looking at it with a hint of disgust.

"THEY ARE TRYING TO END OUR STREAKING!" Unknown said, panicking while still joking around.

"Wait, we were streaking?" Gold asked.

"Well yeah, most of us are naked always. We are Mobians after all." Unknown mentioned.

"It's even more disturbing to think about since we have been hanging out with female ponies that are technically..." Red added.

"Too much information. What are you, 4chan?" Gold said.

"Oh dear Chaos, do not bring that up." Unknown warned.

"Um, guys, what about my kids?" Alex piped up, bring them back onto a much safer and less...disturbing topic.

"Uh, shoot, can't you put them in your bag?" Gold asked.

"I know Golden can fit in there, but what about Metal?" Alex asked, pointing toward his bag and Golden Dawn hopped into it.

"Uh...hide him in the pots?" Red offered a hiding spot.

Alex shrugged at the idea and sent Metal to hide in the pots in the back.

"I hear somepony coming." Night warned, able to hear the hoof-steps approaching them.

In front of the counter, a pony came walking across and stopped in the middle to look at the team. The pony was obviously male, with white fur and a rather messy looking mane and tail that were a dirty blonde, I think? Anyway, the pony had a cutie mark that was a fork with flames surrounding it.

"Good morning everypony. I am Chef Rams-hay." the pony introduced himself. (A/N THE PUNS! AH MY SIDES! THE PUNS ARE TOO MUCH!)

"Today, you all get a once-in-a-lifetime chance to cook in Tartarus's Kitchen for one thousand bits. Your goal is to have a better service than the red team who is prepping right now. You won't be able to see them because you will be cooking. If I so much as see any of you trying to look over there, I will throw you out of this kitchen." Chef said, adding some hostility to the last part of the announcement. "Are we clear?"

"Yes chef." they all said instinctively.

But Red had a question to ask Chef Rams-hay. Also, did I mention how funny this pun is? Well I just did.

"Yes, um..." Chef said, pointing at Red, trying to figure out a name.

"My name is is Red, chef. What if we...haven't necessarily...not really...cooked in a professional kitchen before?" Red asked.

For some reason, Chef looked very irritated and motioned Red to come closer, "Come here you."

Red stepped up in front of everyone else on command.

"I don't like people playing *bleep*ing jokes on me...what the hell? Why can I say *bleep*?" Chef said angrily, with the little beeps replacing some rather naughty words.

"Sorry chef, this story is rated T. You can say hell, but not say words like *bleep* and *bleep* and also you can't say anything about *bleep*." Sora said, saying some naughty words as examples which were bleeped out.

"Well damn. Well, anyways, let's get to work, shall we?" Chef said, walking toward the red kitchen that the blue team couldn't see.

"Gold, I have a feeling that invitation was for people or ponies that actually knew how to cook." Red whispered to Gold.

"Maybe, but this won't be hard." Gold said, looking inside some pots and pans before placing a pot on his head just because it was funny.

"It won't be hard?! We are in a professional kitchen in a high class restaurant and are probably going against a team with high class chefs. How is this not going to be hard?!" Red complained.

"It's not that hard. You just add...well you know...a little butter...and a little salt...and before you know it, you'll have a stunning dish fit for a king!" Gold said, being kinda optimistic but still a bit naïve about the situation.

"Gold, by the ingredients you just said, you...don't have much experience with cooking professionally." Night said, looking around a bit with crossed arms.

"You would be correct, I have no experience." Gold said with a sheepish grin.

"Luckily, I'm Unknown and I can do almost anything." Unknown slightly bragged.

"And I'm a father of two, so I've learned how to cook." Alex mentioned.

"Right, because a PBJ sandwich is just what fancy dinner guests want to eat an an expensive restaurant." Night said.

"Hey, I can cook more than that!" Alex defended himself.

"I'm guessing grilled cheese too." Night said.

"Hey now, we have to work as a team if we want to at least almost win!" Gold said.

"Gold, I doubt we will..." Sora was about to say.

"Stay optimistic!" Gold shouted to his teammates.

"Open Tartarus's Kitchen." they heard Chef say.

Fancy looking guests, all ponies, started walking in from the front of the restaurant as the team started to look at them in all their fanciness.

"Never mind, we are screwed."

"Are you *bleep*ing kidding me? Raw fish?! I wouldn't feed this to my dog!" Chef Rams-hay said to Gold, and smashed the raw fish onto the metal table.

Gold walked back to his station in a very ashamed and mad attitude at another failed entree.

"Yeah, we are screwed. So fricking screwed." Gold mumbled to himself.

"Hey, I'm doing fine over here." Unknown said, going up the 'pass' as it was called, to present another perfect dish to be served.

"Chaos damn it, Unknown, has anyone told you that you are over-powered in cooking." Red said, noticing that every dish Unknown put up was perfect.

"Multiple times, yes. It's a compliment." Unknown said, walking back to his station.

"What's next, going to break the fourth wall?" Red asked.

Unknown ignored him but whispered to the readers, "Just a little reminder here, all meat that is mentioned is fake meat. We aren't serving them real meat, the author needed me to tell that to you guys."

"And there it is." Red said, letting out a sigh afterward.

"Hey, guys, I just noticed this steak that I'm cooking is for a certain 'prince'." Alex mentioned, bringing the steak up.

"Uh...Blueblood?" Gold assumed.

"Exactly, the spoiled brat, Blueblood. Think I should spit on his steak?" Alex said with a smirk.

Unfortunately for him, Chef Rams-hay had overheard his spit comment.

"Hey, look at me you *bleep*ing pig. I don't care who the food is going to, you do not *bleep*ing spit in anypony's food. Got that?" Chef said with anger.

"Yes chef." Alex said, before walking back to his station in a hurry.

The service was now over. It ended with some more yelling by Chef and some more failure on the red team, it was over. Both teams were back in a line in their respective kitchens.

"Well, that was disastrous. And I mean you blue team. Red team wins the service." Chef said and the blue team could hear cheers from the other kitchen.

Female cheers.

"Eon damn it, I know who we went against now." Gold said.

His suspicions were confirmed when the Mane 6 themselves walked in front of the blue kitchen, in the same garb as the blue team but with red stripes.

"Hiya, guys! We win!" Pinkie said, and all the rest of the ponies danced in celebration in front of the kitchen.

"EONNNNNN DAMNNNNNNN YOUUUUUUU, PINKKIIIIIIIIIIE PIEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Sonic: Did you just...

I did.

Sonic: You just made a parody of Hell's Kitchen.

I did :D

Sonic: And you ponified Chef Ramsay and made it a pun.

YES I DIDDDDDD! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH! I was typing this while watching TV, and guess what was on the TV! Hell's Kitchen!

Sonic: Are you sure about this chapter? There might be people who don't know what that show is!

BIG WHOOPP, IT STILL WAS FUNNY! NEXT CHAPTER WE HAVE:

GOLD

TAYLOR

BLADE

GLIMPSE

AURA

GRABARC

WELL THERE IT IS! SEE YOU ALL THEN! Thank you for reading and reviewing, I hope I made you laugh today, anddddd RANDOM PHRASE TIME!

DO NOT LET YOUR CAT EAT YOUR LAMPSHADE!