Cold beer bottles clink, and confetti streamers explode into the air with a loud pop. Ghirahim makes to grab the champagne and lets it loose all over the floor, yielding a verbal thrashing from Kafei. Pizza boxes litter the floor, with plastic plates stacked up along the table and against the counters, leaving grease stains on any unprotected computers and clothing items.

Link sits, mounted up on stacked chairs with a paper crown Ghirahim made for him with the words, "Party Time!" in bubble lettering over the top. He's grinning, broadly, an alcohol buzz kicking in. Anytime anyone passes him, he gets a high five, a pat on the back, or a hug.

"I don't know how you did it, but you were great!" Tingle says, clapping him loudly on the back.

Link grunts, sheepishly tugging his hair. Zelda thanks him profusely.

Above on the ceiling monitor, the Housewives are also throwing a party and skyping in on the entertainment. Along the edges of the screen are pints of icecream and a couple bottles of wine, as well as movie-star glasses and streamers. Back and forth, Tingle and they shout raucously such that had Kafei not been buzzing with alcohol, it's likely he would have kicked the onsie-loving man out.

After having retrieved Ganon's banking information, Zelda's programs took over, and we watched as literally four billion rupees transferred from seven of Ganon's accounts to one of Midna's. That's enough money to make anyone giddy. Though the Twili hardly batted an eye, rather she just kind of sat there like she'd been served a sandwich, leading me to wonder just exactly how loaded she already was.

Midna then had the money wired from her account to the HardRockers as a neutral third party, and the Zora crime circle sent a trademarkedly eerie confirmation message that they had received their payment and were waiting for access to Ganon's computer. During Link's pitch, Zelda had used the transmitter to upload a copy of several of Ganon's computer hard drives to the PorjectHousewives' server, who are now responsible for offering the Zora access. In exchange, Zelda had Midna have promised them money from one of the offshore accounts of Midna's choosing.

Midna left, saying she needed to make sure her bank wouldn't flag her account under all of the ongoing transactions, and because she needed to rest.

Which felt like a breath of fresh air, because as long as Midna wasn't in the room, I felt like I could breathe a little and not have to hover over my wife like a raincloud. But just a little….

I'm sitting off to the side, watching the celebration of champions, feeling ever so slightly disconnected from everyone and all of any other instance, my gut reaction would be to say that stealing is wrong. Though here, it seems, at least partly justified. Maybe it was all of the work I've put into this project. Maybe it's seeing the passion of the love of my life come to fruition. A part of it probably is because, yes, I do believe that what we are doing is technically right.

But obviously, I'm not quite certain if this was the right way to go about it. And now I'm very worried.

I've always known the risk, and I've had long, long conversations with Zelda about the danger of this operation that lasted hours into the night. But that was when this was all a concept that I wasn't sure was even going to work.

Now, it's done. And there is literally no turning back.

Zelda sits down next to me, and I try to smile. "Nice job," I say, "I'm so proud of you." The words are sincere, but her eyes reflect an understanding of my pain.

Instead she wraps an arm around my torso and just holds me. I focus on her warmth, letting the unsightly surroundings fade away.

"I scheduled us both appointments at the gynecologist's office," Zelda whispers, "Just to see how we are, and which of us would be in better condition to possibly carry a baby. There are plenty of other things we'll need to do, like sit down and look at the finances and -"

Overwhelmed, I pull her close and kiss her. I don't even care if it's literally in front of everyone. Ghirahim starts clapping, and I think Kafei punches him - I don't really know, nor do I care at this point.

"It's a start," Zelda says once I finally let her breathe. "Because you're absolutely right. This," she waves to the now filthy board room, "can't be our entire lives." She leans forward and kisses me again, whispering, "I'm glad you're happy," against my lips.

This time when I smile, it is sincere.

"I'm going to make a grocery run before getting back. I want some real food," I say. "We can eat leftovers anytime. I want to celebrate. And let's be honest, pizza just isn't going to cut it for me."

"Okay," she says, letting me up, "I'm probably going to stay here for a few more hours until the boys leave, and help Kafei clean up. We've made a mess of his house."

"That's great. I'll have dinner ready for you when you get home."

Arms full of brown grocery bags, my mind is on fractured ruminations about banks and lawyers and baby blanket motiffs, and black suits and masked clad Zora sitting in our living room, and….

What the fuck?

I take a large gasp and stare at the three men, feeling my heartbeat surge all the way through my fingertips. They rise in unison, and the floor creaks beneath their polished black shoes.

"Fuck!"

These are no ordinary Zora, as one can imagine.

"Stay back!" I scream, dropping the groceriess. I suddenly wish I had a gun in my hands. Scare them off - something...

The one in the middle, slightly bulky and with the more ornate mask, pulls a handgun out of his suit and points it at my head.

"Where is Zelda?" he asks.