The Eleventh Chapter

The next morning, the fairy still didn't show. Mikkel decided to wake earlier than usual, as he expected Lukas' arrival. At ten, his heart was aching. At noon, he was beginning to panic. He had never meant to frighten Lukas, he had just been furious before. If he would have known that he would run away like this, he would have been kinder.

Once again, the man trekked outside and began a new search. He yelled for the fairy over and over again with his broken voice. There was never a reply. Now that the sun was shining brightly above and he could see much better than he could have the night before, he wandered past the field and into the trees. He never wandered here, but thought it would have been worth a look.

"Lukas? Please!" He shouted through the trees. A bird sang in the distance. A butterfly fluttered next to his cheek. But there was no sign of the fairy. He looked at the butterfly again, a faint smile forming on his lips. He stepped towards it, admiring its vibrant colour as a distraction from the disaster at hand. It stopped on a large, old tree, then flew away.

Mikkel watched the butterfly, then turned with a deep breath to the tree. He almost turned away, but something on the trunk caught his eye. There was a shallow carving that was just below his chin. It looked like an "X", or perhaps a cross. It was presumably a mark from a hunter, and Mikkel continued on his way, flattening a few flowers as he moved on.

The man, after hours of searching, found nothing and went back home to work on his journals. As much as he wanted to focus on finding Lukas, he had to finish his work. Throughout the entire time he was writing, his mind was going off on tangents. There wasn't a minute in the day that Lukas wasn't in his mind. When the sun went down and the stars began to shine, he closed the journal and held his face in his hands.

"This is all my fault," he thought. "I was so cruel to him!" He despised himself for what he'd done to the fairy. Mikkel worked on the last bottle of liquor he had in the house. At least it numbed the pain for now. He stumbled around the kitchen, holding the little things he'd made for Lukas and things he used. The bowl he bathed in, the lid he used as a plate, a half-eaten candy.

When he fell asleep last night, which he ended up doing on the sofa, he held the items to his chest, singing drunkenly to them.

Five days passed. Mikkel had finished three journals and only needed one more. That was the only relief in his life. The entirety of his being was miserable. He didn't know how he was supposed to leave soon to return to the city without the little fairy. He had made so many promises to him that he felt as though he needed to keep.

Lukas was supposed to be with him as long as he could. For as long as Mikkel could care for him and make him happy. He no longer desired to profit off of him or study him. He wanted his friendship and nothing more. That was his only wish.

Lingering in the back of his head was a dark thought that something bad had happened to Lukas. It could have been that a weasel or a wasp hurt him and he was somewhere on the forest floor, crying out in pain. Mikkel wasn't there to help him.

Mikkel cleared away the tears in his throat. He denied them. It would have been ridiculous to cry. Lukas was safe, most likely, singing to some flower that he thought was beautiful. The thought made him smile weakly, but did little for his nerves.

After that week passed, so did another, and Mikkel had only one week left at the house on the island. He had finished his journals and had sent them off to the university so that they could be reviewed. He had done a lousy job due to his lack of focus, but the head of the science department was sure to look past it.

He had nearly given up on Lukas returning. There was still a small amount of hope left within him, but it seemed more like a pipe dream than an actuality. As long as Lukas was satisfied, wherever he was, then the man supposed that he could be content as well.

Later in the evening, when the sun was just above the trees and still sinking, he sat next to the window, listened to music, and began to draw pictures to capture the moments that the fairy had during his short stay.

Mikkel filled the last pieces of paper with beautiful images of Lukas, and when he was done, he looked out the window to watch birds and insects fly by. He no longer tried to capture them. He only admired them from afar. One could say that he'd learned his lesson.

When the sky darkened just slightly, the man made himself a pot of coffee. He stood over the warm stove, poured himself a cup, and sipped it slowly. If he wouldn't have been so focused on his drink, he would have noticed the silhouette in front of the window. Luckily, he turned his head when he heard a light tapping on the glass.

Mikkel turned to see Lukas standing on the windowsill. His face was bright red and his cheeks glistened as if they were wet. In his arms he held a lush red flower that must have been twice the size that he was. The man stood watching, awestruck by the creature.

"Mikkel," he said with a smile. The fairy flew over to him, but the weight of the flower pulled him down, and the man had to catch him before he hit the ground. Nothing had given Mikkel so much joy in weeks as seeing the fairy again. He cupped him in his hands, telling him sweet things over and over.

"You could never understand how much I've missed you." "I am going to treat you much better from now on." "I thought about you every day, you know." "I am so happy that you've finally returned to me!"

The fairy beamed at each remark. He was panting quietly and finally sat down on Mikkel's palm. "Mikkel, this flower is for you. I picked it all by myself. Do you like it? I thought it was the prettiest one."

Mikkel nodded, took the flower, and immediately put it in the best vase he could find. "It is the most beautiful flower I have ever seen in my life. I love it! I… I adore it!" He announced with a chuckle. The fairy smiled softly at him and rested his cheek on the man's finger, squeezing it tightly.

"Mikkel, I missed you."

"I missed you, too!"

The fairy curled up and closed his eyes, smiling even wider and baring his sharp teeth. The smile made Mikkel smile again and he said, "Thank you for coming back to me, Lukas. I promise I will take good care of you from now on. I will take you to the cinema whenever you want and we can listen to music every single day and you can have all the sweets you want. Whenever you want them, too!"

Lukas let out a breathless laugh and said, "Can I have a sweet right now?"

The man didn't hesitate for one moment. He took the brown bag of candy out of the cabinet, took out a cherry drop, and gave it to Lukas. The fairy didn't reach up to take it, but said, "Put it here. Next to me."

Mikkel did as he was told and set the candy down on his finger in front of Lukas' face. The fairy opened his eyes slightly, looked at the shining candy, and tried, as he always did, to fit more of it in his mouth than he could. He was able to take a crumb from it and he kept it locked in his mouth, letting the syrup that he had been craving since he'd left overwhelm him.

"Is it good? You look happy! After that, I can make you some warm bread and some soup and some pastries. How does this sound?"

The fairy smiled softly. "You are so nice, Mikkel. You are a flower." He closed his eyes again, and let his wings fall. The minute that his wings fell flat against his back, his smile faded, and the candy slid out from between his lips and onto Mikkel's palm.

"Lukas?" Mikkel gently tapped his shoulder, but he was still. The man's eyes widened and he brushed a fingertip over Lukas' hair. "Lukas? Are you asleep?"

The creature only lay limply in his hand. Mikkel stared at his form for just a moment, taking him in. He knew he was repeating Lukas' name, but couldn't feel himself doing it. It was automatic, like a cry. He tried again to wake the fairy. And again. And again. And even when he knew it was in vain, he kept trying. But Lukas wouldn't wake up.

"Lukas, I never meant…" The words caught in the man's throat and he brought the fairy close, pressing his tiny form close to his cheek. "Lukas, please. Please wake up," he choked out. He ran his finger along Lukas' back comfortingly, though there was nothing to comfort anymore. In another desperate attempt, he tried to sing to him, but it was all useless.

Mikkel's eyes were blurred with tears. He felt that this was all his fault. Something bad had happening to Lukas when he was alone, and now, he was dead. He wrapped him up in a thin tea towel and set him on the mantel in a way that looked like he could just be asleep, and that was just comforting enough for Mikkel to not be consumed by how sad he felt.

He sat down at his desk, buried his face in his hand, and grieved. He let his tears fall freely and didn't bother wiping them away anymore. "This is my fault," he said aloud. "I shouldn't have been so harsh. I should have protected you."

Mikkel wiped his nose on his sleeve, rubbed his eyes, and stood up. He took the fairy in his hand again and said, "I have never cared about anyone so much in the world as I've cared about you, my little fairy." He then, just as he did when Lukas had cried before, cradled him in his hand and told him goodnight.