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Battle raged all around Ryll. She stood in the open, sheathed in armor and holding a sword that was stained with blood. Bodies littered the ground around her, and she could feel a cut on her arm that stung painfully. Everything was in chaos. She knew there was something she needed to do, something that she needed to prevent. She turned and saw Arthur facing a boy with dark, curly hair. There was hatred in the younger boy's eyes and sorrow in Arthur's blue ones. Both held their swords ready but before anything happened, Ryll's vision went black.

When Ryll came to she was lying in a forest. There was something familiar about it. She got to her feet and started running. She had shed her armor and was now in a simple dress. As she reached a clearing, she tripped suddenly over something, sprawling flat on the ground. She got up and then recoiled with a scream. A body lay on the ground. "No, no, no!" she whispered, shaking uncontrollably. It was Morgana, her hazel eyes wide open and reflecting the sky and treetops above her. There was a single sword wound to her abdomen. She was dead. Ryll felt herself begin to sob uncontrollably, but she still needed to keep going. There was someone she needed to save. She stumbled on, loathed to leave her friend behind.

When she breached the edge of the woods she found herself facing Avalon's languid lake. Two figures sat near the water. One was Merlin and the other Arthur. Merlin was holding Arthur who lay still. "No!" Ryll said aloud. She ran toward them. She couldn't be too late. She was supposed to be the one to save him. No, not save, sacrifice. Ryll slowed when she reached them. Merlin looked up at her with sad eyes, and Ryll knew what she had to do. She reached down and touched Arthur's face, still warm. This was her power, her sacrifice.

"Goodbye, Merlin," she said softly as the world around her began to blur and she felt the life drain from her body.

Ryll awoke with a start, breathing hard. It was night and the room lay in darkness. She looked around and then felt her cheeks to make sure she was still alive. It was just a dream. How much of a dream? she asked herself. Was it a dream at all or what is to come? She didn't know, but it had felt so real. She put a hand to her arm almost expecting to find an injury, but the skin was smooth. The thought of Arthur dying – and of Morgana dead – was too much for her to bear. She shut her eyes and curled up under her blankets, trying to drive the memories from her mind. Gaius had been right when he had said knowing about the future was too heavy a burden for one person. Ryll didn't want to know what was going to happen, didn't want to dread it. Knowing she had to die to save Arthur was enough to keep her on edge, but if this was some sort of fore dream… No, it was just a dream. She forced herself to believe it. The future is unpredictable. Maybe knowing that I will need to save Arthur can help me prevent it from happening at all. She felt hope at this. She knew what was going to happen, so what was stopping her from changing that?

She focused on good memories as she tried to fall asleep again, driving away all thoughts of destiny and fate and death. She thought of the first time she came to Camelot, meeting Merlin, their first kiss, her friends, finally recovering her memories of her parents… She fell asleep with these thoughts in her head and did not dream again that night.

…

Merlin woke up early to pick flowers for Ryll. He felt like she needed something to keep her mind off of her worries and it seemed like a normal sort of thing for him to do for her. He headed off into the meadows before Arthur awoke and picked a handful of wildflowers. After returning to the city, he hurried back to Arthur's room to check that he was still asleep. He was. He turned to leave.

"Merlin? Is that you?" Arthur's groggy voice came from the bed.

"No, you're still asleep. You're dreaming." It was worth a try.

"What do you have in your hand?"

"Nothing." He turned around, keeping the flowers behind his back.

"You're hiding something from me."

"No, nothing," Merlin said. "I think you're still a little sleepy."

"Are you insinuating that I'm seeing things?" Arthur asked grumpily.

"Not at all, sire, I'm just pointing out that you're still sleepy and sometimes things are not as they seem."

"If you're trying to sneak out from your duties…"

"I would never do that," Merlin said with mock horror. "I just needed to do something very quickly before you wake up."

"Really? Before I wake up? Good luck with that."

"You won't even miss me."

"Who are the flowers for?"

"What flowers? I don't have any flowers." Merlin took one hand from behind his back. "See?"

"Merlin."

"Fine, I wanted to spruce up my room."

"They're for Ryll, aren't they?"

Merlin nearly dropped the flowers in surprise. "Why would they be for her?" he asked. "I mean they could be for anyone. And besides, they're not for anyone. They're for me. For my room." He was rambling. Arthur just stared at him.

"Be back in five minutes or I'll use you for target practice today," he said finally.

"Really? I mean, thank you. I'll go put these in my room." He hurried out of the room, leaving Arthur to roll his eyes.

He hurried to Ryll's room, realizing halfway there that he had no vase. He was about to knock on her door when he realized that she was probably still asleep. He opened the door a crack and saw that she was still huddled under her blankets, fast asleep. A full glass of water sat on her bedside table and he set them in that. He looked down at her for a moment as she slept, noting that her fist was clenched around the sheets. He didn't want to wake her though and left her to her dreaming.

Arthur was up when he returned to his room, and Merlin went about getting his clothes ready. "Did she like them?" Arthur asked when Merlin helped him into his jacket.

"Did who like what?" Merlin asked, feigning innocence.

"Really, Merlin, you are impossible," Arthur said, sounding exasperated. "Never mind. You can keep your secrets to yourself. It's really none of my business anyway."

"I'll just go get your breakfast then," Merlin said after he had finished helping Arthur dress.

"Don't you usually get that before I get up?" Arthur asked.

"Well sometimes but if I did that everyday then where would the fun be in that?"

"I wasn't aware that breakfast was supposed to be fun."

"Oh, of course. That's why I wanted to mix it up a little and get it for you after you woke up and got dressed."

"Well we don't want to have too much fun, do we now?" Arthur asked. "In fact, I'm not sure I could handle much more fun, so why don't we stick to it being here before I wake up."

"Good plan." Merlin went to retrieve Arthur's breakfast, serving him in silence and awaiting repercussions from the prince. Arthur seemed to be in a tolerating mood that morning, however, and Merlin avoided invoking his wrath. To Merlin's further surprise, Arthur gave him the afternoon off.

"I'll be overseeing the training of some of the new knights, so I won't need you this afternoon. You can do whatever it is you do in your free time."

"Free time?" Merlin had asked. "I'm not sure what that is."

"Don't press your luck, Merlin. I could always find more tasks for you if you don't know what to do in your free time."

"That's all right, I'm sure I can think of something," Merlin had said quickly before Arthur changed his mind. He went to see if Gaius needed any help before returning to Ryll's room. She answered his knock right away, letting him in before shutting the door behind him.

"Is everything all right, you look worried," he said when he saw her face.

"It's nothing," she said a little too quickly. And then, "Just a bad dream." She smiled weakly. He could tell that whatever it was she'd dreamed had upset her.

"Sometimes dreams can be horrible, but they're not real," he assured her.

"I'm not sure about this one. You know my dreams have come true before."

"Yes, but that was before. You're different now – at least your magic is."

"You're probably right. Anyway, what are you doing here? I would have thought Arthur would be sending you off on errands right about now."

"He gave me the afternoon off, if you can believe it," Merlin told her.

"I can hardly believe it. He must have woken up in a good mood."

"I guess. He didn't even yell at me for not having his breakfast ready on time."

"Did you leave these?" Ryll asked, motioning to the wildflowers he'd left for her earlier.

"Do you like them?"

"No one's ever brought me flowers before," she replied. "It was such a sweet thought."

"You deserve it." He loved the smile it invoked. She'd lived a hard enough life. Simple gestures like this touched her more than it they would a normal person. "Would you like to ride out into the woods this afternoon? Maybe we could practice controlling your elemental magic if you want. Or we could do something entirely different."

"No, I'd like that. I want to see what I can do and I need to keep practicing my control."

"Alright. I'll pack us a lunch and meet you in the stables in ten minutes," he told her.

"Alright. I'll go get the horses saddled." She smiled, squeezing his hand before leaving the room.

Ten minutes later they were riding out of the city gates together. Merlin felt a sense of freedom as they left the castle behind. Practicing magic with Ryll was the perfect way to spend his afternoon off. She seemed eager to practice her magic, and he understood that feeling well. Again he wished he could tell her of his own magic. He wasn't really sure anymore why he didn't tell her. It was starting to become more a matter of saving himself from the anger he knew she'd show once she'd found out he'd been keeping that from her all this time. He didn't want to hurt her by telling her he'd lied since the day he'd met her. It had been to protect her at first and then because he didn't want to burden her but now it was getting too late. He had to tell her soon or the right time was going to have come and gone. Somehow waiting had only made it harder. Now he had no idea how to start that conversation. Funny thing. You see, I have magic too. I'm actually a powerful sorcerer and am supposed to help Arthur unite Albion. You know all those times you've felt alone and frightened of your magic? I've felt that same way too and for some reason have never mentioned it to you. No, there was no good way to bring it up at this point. He'd have to wait for the perfect time. Maybe there was no perfect time.

"You seem preoccupied," Ryll said, interrupting his thoughts.

"Sorry, I'm just not used to having time to myself," he said. "Usually I'm busy doing something for Arthur."

"You deserve this. You work much too hard," Ryll told him. "And Arthur doesn't even know about half the things you've done for him." That was true. Of course if Arthur knew half the things Merlin had done, even if they had been to save him, he would have tossed Merlin out on the streets or worse. Sometimes it bothered Merlin that he couldn't tell Arthur what he had done. He'd only ever used his magic to help him – all right, he might have had a little fun here and there, but Arthur deserved it. Like when he was trying to take Merlin's head off with a mace the day they'd met. He smiled at the memory. It seemed like yesterday. It was hard to believe that nearly two years had passed.

When they reached a clearing deep into the woods, they dismounted, tying their horses at the edge of the clearing. "Now, why don't you show me what you can do," Merlin told Ryll. He was eager to see her power in full force. He wasn't familiar with elemental power, but from what he had already seen from her, she was powerful. He watched as she shut her eyes, concentrating, and then as she set every leaf within the clearing swirling upwards. The horses both whinnied in fright, but Ryll didn't seem to notice. She sent the leaves up in a spiral until they formed a sort of tornado above her head. Her golden curls swayed in the wind and she looked every bit as powerful as she was in that moment. Then she opened her eyes and let the leaves fall.

"Impressive," Merlin said. He itched to show her his magic. Maybe now was the right time after all, but the undeniable truth of the matter was that he'd waited too long to tell her. How could she not be mad after he'd kept it from her so long? He'd let her carry that burden without letting her know she wasn't alone.

"I still haven't tried controlling fire or earth."

"Can you create fire?" he asked.

Ryll shut her eyes and held out her palm, concentrating. Merlin wanted to show her how to start a fire with magic, but held himself back. For a moment nothing happened, then flames shot up from Ryll's hand. She opened her eyes and gasped but the flames did not hurt her. She touched a finger to it. "I can't feel it." She let the flames die down. Then she knelt down and put a hand on the ground. This time it took a long time for her to summon her magic. Finally a tiny crack appeared in the earth where her hand lay. It spread until it formed a thin line across the clearing. Ryll opened her eyes and took her hand from the earth. "I could do so much damage," she whispered. She backed away from the line.

"But you can control it," Merlin assured her. "There will probably never be a need for you to use that kind of magic." She looked at him, eyes unsure. He came forward and took her hands. "I trust you," he said. "You know how to control it."

"I hope so. I feel like my magic is straining, trying to get loose. It wants me to use it. I'm just afraid it will grow too strong for me to control."

"You have to remember that it's your magic. It doesn't control you; you control it. Don't ever think it has power over you."

Ryll smiled. "You're so wise, Merlin," she said.

"It comes with practice," he said. "You grow wise when you have to deal with Arthur all day everyday." Ryll laughed, the tension gone from her face.

"Let's just enjoy the rest of the afternoon," she said. "I don't want to think about my magic right now. I just want to be normal. Sometimes I wish I could just be normal. Somehow destiny always seems to get in the way."

Merlin laughed without humor. "It really does."