AN: So I got some criticism for my last FT oneshot. And that's good – feedback is good. Still, only one person actually explained what they disliked, so… yeah, I guess it was more about Lucy's thoughts on her former enemies, in a sense, but for me, it's hard to think about one thing without connecting it to another thing. Lucy's smarter than some people give her credit for, so I think she'd notice the similarities. It's not just Natsu and Jellal, though, Zeref's part of that 'awkward comparisons' triangle as well. Yeah, they're all different. Natsu's a reckless idiot, while Jellal thinks things through and Zeref has four hundred years of experience to know better. Jellal blames himself for everything, while Zeref only blames himself for things he knows he caused and Natsu doesn't know what responsibility is. Zeref has completely given up on living, while Natsu always sees value in his life and Jellal knows that there are things worth living for. Still, all three of them are very convicted in their separate beliefs, and all of them accidently troll their girls at some point. Zeref and Jellal both feel lost and confused about their lives and the women they love, Jellal and Natsu are both determined to protect their loved ones at all costs, and Natsu and Zeref– well, let's not get into that just yet. So, for those of you who didn't like As I Look Skyward, I decided to write a little something else: namely, another chapter of Witch's Sin. Hopefully, this will at least get a chuckle or two. I hope you enjoy this, and I apologize if my last story didn't meet your expectations. Thanks for reading!
Warning: In this story, Jellal, Ultear, and Merudy face their most fearsome opponent yet – puberty. I warned you.
Story the Tenth: First Blood
Jellal had not spent very long as a member of Crime Sorcière (they'd only destroyed, like, twenty Dark Guilds or something; talk about a let down – it had been four months already), but he felt an attachment of sorts to his new comrades. Ultear was kind of hard to be around, partly because she was the one who'd brainwashed him, but also because she kept trying to make him feel less guilty. Merudy, on the other hand, was a different story.
The girl was only just touching down on the emotional side of herself, which resulted in a mixture of awkward outbursts and long, dull silences. Still, she was sweet and Jellal thought she was fun to spend time with. She was the reason he had been able to forgive Ultear, after all, though it helped that he mostly still blamed himself. Thus, when he woke up to the sound of Merudy's scream, he was understandably concerned.
"Merudy!" he burst into her– well, he rolled over. They were sharing a cave, not a house (Jellal slept facing the wall, since Ultear had no problems with him seeing her naked). She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face.
"I'm dying!" she sobbed, flinging her arms around his neck. Jellal held her awkwardly, wondering where Ultear had gone off to (she was probably getting food, but she might also have been going to the bathroom/'pissing tree', as Merudy called it). His nose twitched, and iron filled his nostrils, waking him up completely.
"You are bleeding!" he yelled, grabbing her shoulders and looking her in the eye. "Where are you hurt? I will bandage it up right away, you–" he stopped as Merudy blushed, awkwardly pointing down towards her legs. "Your legs?" he asked, confused. That wasn't usually fatal, unless she meant the artery in her– oh. He let out a deep sigh of relief. "You are not dying, Merudy."
"I'm not?" she asked, sniffling. He shook his head, smiling uncomfortably. He had assumed that, since Merudy had already started developing breasts when he had first met her, she would know about these things. Goddamnit, Ultear.
"No, you are not." he said, taking a deep breath. "Er, Merudy, did Ultear by any chance ever mention something called 'puberty'?" Merudy blinked, confused.
"She might've said something about it when this started," she said, gesturing towards her chest. "She was kind of crying, though. Something about me growing up, I think." Jellal nodded, silently cursing Ultear. He had gotten "The Talk" from Brain when he was fifteen (and no, he hadn't had any idea that having a bunch of weird thoughts about Erza – who, at that point, had been his enemy – was completely and totally normal), and it was not as mentally scarring as one might have expected it to be, especially since Brain believed in efficiency. There had been an unnecessary amount of visuals, though, thanks to Brain's archive, and Ultear had teased him for weeks (even though they had both been evil, neither would deny that they had had some good times together).
"Merudy, there comes a time in the life of every young girl when her body starts to change," he explained, grateful that Brain had decided to tell him about female puberty as well as male. Give the guy some credit – he would have made a great science teacher, if he hadn't been a raging psychopath. "She begins to grow breasts, as well as hair on other parts of her body. Similar things happen to men, although it is a bit different. Anyway, your body is changing now, and the blood is a part of that." Merudy blinked.
"But why do I need to bleed for my body to change?" she asked. "And why from down there?" Jellal squirmed uncomfortably, but he felt obligated to answer.
"Well… your body is preparing you for, uh, reproduction." He told her. "The blood mixes with some other… stuff, and acts as a cushion for a potential baby. Once a month, your body gets rid of it all. It is called 'menstruation'."
"More commonly known as a 'period'," Ultear said, walking back into the cave. "Merudy was complaining about cramps last night, so I went shopping for some supplies this morning, just in case." Jellal frowned at her.
"You could have warned me," he complained. "I do not know very much about the workings of the female body, aside from what Brain told me, and he seemed to believe that I did not need to know too much. I assume because he was aware that I was not myself at the time." Ultear shrugged.
"Actually, I think he thought you were gay," she said bluntly. Jellal choked, and made some spluttering sounds. Merudy, having calmed down, giggled at her friend's plight. "I thought so too," Ultear continued. "I actually just assumed that Erza was an exception or something."
"That's true," Merudy agreed. "I mean, you've seen Ul naked loads of times, and you never even got a Pants Tent like Zancrow used to." Jellal raised his eyebrows.
"Why is it that she knows about erections but not the menstrual cycle?" he asked. Ultear just shrugged.
"I had to explain it to her somehow," she said. "And she was too little to go into detail. Speaking of detail, why didn't you get a boner? Aren't I pretty?"
"No, I mean yes, but no, I –" Jellal inhaled deeply. "I am not having this conversation," he stated.
"Is it because I'm not a redhead?" Ultear teased. Jellal flushed.
"I do not know what you are talking about," he said, crossing his arms.
"Man, you're a bad liar," Merudy told him. "Ul, teach me what to do with this stuff." She was waving around a pack of tampons. Jellal decided to cut his losses and get the hell out of there.
"I am going to go make something to eat," he said. Ultear grinned after him.
"Don't get too excited, Lover Boy!" she called. Jellal tripped, face as red as his tattoo. Merudy and Ultear just laughed. Jellal hoped that the Tenrou group got back soon. He wasn't sure how much more of this he could take, but he was fairly certain that it was less than he eventually would have to.
Five and a half years. Apparently.
AN: Well, I hope that was good. I know it wasn't as long as the last chapter, but I really wanted to get this out, and honestly? It's kind of hard to drag out a story about a fourteen year old with a decently sized rack somehow only now just getting her first period. I told you, being evil fucks up puberty. And yes, that will be my excuse for any plot holes. Also, please note that these oneshots are not only non-chronological, not all of them fit together. For example, in a previous, Erik very clearly knows Kinana's name (though he has yet to officially learn it in the anime), but a couple chapters later, he gives a vague description of her that could apply to Laki as well, even though both chapters are in the same arc. Yes, I am aware of it. Was it intentional? Does it matter? I don't know. Either way, am I the only one who thinks that Jellal is probably more into guys than girls? Like, Erza's the exception to that, y'know? Well, that, or he's Erza-sexual. It's a thing. Trust me. Also, Jellal is allergic to using contractions. I guess an apostrophe killed his dog or something. I'm going to go back through the older chapters and make sure that this is still true. I hope you enjoyed reading, and I'll see you next time!