Chapter 12 Part 3
Disclaimer: So this chapter is now a three parter, and just so you know I don't own DA.
Fergus recalled from his talks with Teegan and Alistair up until their trip to Redcliffe and Teegan recognizing her, no one including her companions knew who she really was. She passed herself as an Antivan rogue, who Duncan recruited in Highever. She and Draco typically camped away from everyone keeping to themselves for the first few months. At night though she could be heard crying or seen returning from washing with red marks all over, as if she was trying to scrub something off that wasn't disappearing. Redcliffe changed all that as both wardens' identities were revealed and she was forced to tell who she was and what led her to Ostagar. She even suggested leaving as being with her put their lives in danger. As numerous attempts had been made on her life, as their attackers seemed to mention the female warden more than him. No one mainly her fellow warden would hear of it, as he already developed feelings for her and he wasn't going to allow her to go off alone. Before leaving Redcliffe for the Circle Tower, Alistair admitted his feelings for her and they shared their first kiss. Minus the argument about Isolde, they were inseparable for the next nine months.
Alistair thought the reason they targeted her because she was their very outspoken leader, but looking back he realized Howe wanted her dead because she was the sole survivor and knew his crimes. Cailan even wrote in his papers found in the royal chest that if she survived he made Duncan promise that her duty to the Wardens would be over or the wardens would be exiled from Ferelden again. Cailan knew that in the event of his and Fergus' death that each was the heirs to Highever and Ferelden respectively. All the pieces were fitting as Loghain never stationed his men to the Tower of Ishal, as all the men they found near there were Cailan's men. He knew that he and Em were heading to the tower to light the signal, which they battled darkspawn but Em successfully lit only to watch Loghain's army never charge before darkness overtook them both. Cailan fighting on the front lines was an added bonus, as with both Couslands, Eamon and himself out of the way Loghain and Howe would have free reign over Ferelden. The Maker only knew how long those two were in an alliance with one another.
It all made sense now to the three men, Howe used Loghain's hatred and paranoia of Orlais for his reasoning in overtaking Highever and massacring the Couslands and any witnesses. He just didn't count on Emily surviving the attack. Emily was too much of a risk to be kept alive as she knew Howe's part at Highever, and they never heard one's name without the other in the events in Redcliffe, the Circle, Denerim, especially the Alienage. Em would've figured out that Loghain either knew or possibly ordered the attack at Highever. Teegan mentioned that Em actually wanted Howe to stand trial, but Anora's imprisonment changed that in order to free her. "She had to kill him and everyone around him to get to the mage who had magically sealed Anora in a room. Em preferred a trial as she was barely recognized herself anymore, as each death by her hand she was turning into Zev, and that scared her to the point of seeing if she could be made tranquil as with killing and losing you, she wanted to feel nothing anymore." Alistair threw his goblet at the wall after as it sunk in the damage so many including Duncan, Eamon and himself had inflicted on her to where she was willing to feel nothing including the joys of motherhood. Not to mention he was unsure if she went through it the effect it would have on their child. Thanks to Eamon's interference they were already broken up by then and she excluded him from Anora's rescue and everything else. He should've stood up to Eamon that night in Eamon's study, none of the pain she endured those last few months would've happened. He would've made Em stay behind as it was clearly a trap by Loghain, in his paranoid state now saw Howe and Anora as threats. Eamon took advantage as he sent word through Zevran pressuring Emily to rescue Anora at Howe's estate. His hatred grew for his former guardian as Eamon was willing to sacrifice Emily as she could've been killed by Howe, tortured or killed at Fort Drakon. He thanked to the Maker she and the baby escaped unharmed from there as she posed as a guard from what Zev told him.
Teegan noticed the tension in the room from Alistair and brought up the previous conversation before Alistair got silent in his thoughts. Teegan had cleaned out Isolde's study and found several interesting letters, according to healers Isolde no longer could carry children and that she acquired Jowan through Howe and Loghain. Connor apparently showed signs for months and she appealed to Howe and Loghain seeking an apostate to train her son in secret. She feared that Eamon would find out sending Connor to the Circle. Isolde, as you can imagine was worried of being replaced as she was infertile. Loghain sent Jowan to pose as Connor's tutor and so he could poison Eamon. Apparently Loghain had gotten word that Cailan was months away from setting aside Anora for the Orlesian Empress Celene. Apparently Eamon was behind the political marriage between Celene and Cailan, pressuring Cailan to set aside Anora. They would split time between here and Orlais, make Eamon chancellor and in charge while Cailan is Orlais I also found evidence that Isolde wasn't the grieving wife she appeared to be as she wasn't aware originally, but she learned that Loghain had Eamon poisoned. To keep her position and secrets safe, she went along with it.
Alistair would forever regret yelling at Emily for Isolde's death as all the reasons she presented then were valid and now with what Teegan said and the evidence proved. Isolde would've been executed for her actions at Redcliffe and conspiring with Loghain and Howe. He remembered their argument and Em saying it was Isolde's choice and as Isolde was dying she prayed to be forgiven for her actions over the last few months. Emily told him it seemed odd as Redcliffe village had only been attacked for two weeks before they arrived. She told him there was no way she was going to kill Connor, as he was an innocent child who was being controlled by a demon who should've had proper training instead of a apprentice mage. He realized now that Isolde's death was the only viable option as Connor didn't need to pay for his mother's actions. At the time the Circle wasn't an option, as it had been annulled as Emily agreed with Greagior and convinced First Enchanter Irving that annulment was necessary as the threat of demons and abominations was too great. She sent Leliana
The templars would've wanted to kill Connor, which knowing Emily anyone who tried to including himself would've have to get through her, and he'd seen her take on eight Darkspawn by herself. She would've fought to her death to save Connor. He remembered one of the reasons he started falling for her was watching Emily around children. His love would go out of her way to talk and comfort them, especially if they didn't have parents. She would even go without her share of the coin by giving it to them or without eating by giving what was in her knapsack. Em always bent down to their level to talk to them in the sweetest voice he ever heard; sometimes she would mess with their hair which would make them laugh. He learned from Fergus that she would make a point of having special auntie time each day or night with Oren, and would always bend to Oren's or the squire's level when talking to them.
Teegan watched with amazement the effect Emily had on his two friends, as they both seemed miles away. He continued writing his letter to Leliana or Zevran. Fergus remembered when he was fourteen and Em was ten. He left his longsword out in the training yard, and she had found it. Em tried picking it up, but it slipped from her hands and cut into her leg falling down to the ground. Her scream was heard throughout the castle with everyone running towards her. Their father picked her up with ease carrying to her room. She would be confined to bed for a week while her leg healed and bore a scar, but she was okay. She told her parents she was trying to put the sword away, so Fergus and Rory wouldn't get in trouble. Their parents told the two boys to wait in Fergus' room for them. While they were waiting both Nan and Mother Mallol came in and lectured them. Finally Bryce and Eleanor entered, both were furious. They were grounded for the next three months, and would have additional chores and studies. Bryce also barred either from the training yards until they could prove they were responsible. He remembered he and Rory weren't allowed to train again until Emily's eleventh nameday a year later, when their parents allowed her to start archery lessons.
Fergus asked with all of her duties, if she would allowed to keep up her training, as he knew it was something she enjoyed, Alistair said "of course as that's part of her, I will be her only sparring partner though, unless either of you want to spar against her. Neither of us are no longer in the Order as the deal I made with the First Warden in giving them Soldier's Peak and Amaranthine, she and I were released by our Grey Warden duties." Both were relieved at that statement. Alistair waited for anymore questions, but both seemed pleased with what he said. Teegan spoke" I apologize for questioning your motives and overstepping Fergus, but I owed it to Bryce to make sure you were worthy of his only daughter. He then told them of his talk with Bryce several years ago and what Bryce wanted for her, Alistair now understood as he imagined if it was their daughter, he would be asking the same questions to his daughter's suitors. Alistair asked Teegan impatiently aren't you supposed to be sending a letter before the sun sets. Teegan already had written it while they talked and was waiting for the crow to come to retrieve it. One of Teegan's staff came by telling word had sent to Redcliffe to have the ship ready within two weeks, and he would be notified when it docked in Gwaren.