Edward paused, turkey sandwich lingering between his mouth and the plate. He was getting just about sick of this.

"Ed? You alright?"

Frowning, Edward placed his half eaten sandwich back down and wrenched his gaze back to Roy. "Some guy's been staring at me the whole time we've been here," he answered, crossing his arms in a huff. "It's creepy. I mean, it's not like I mind the attention," he added, flicking his ponytail back, teasing. "But it's hard to eat with someone watching you like that."

As Ed watched, Roy's eyes scanned the tiny restaurant they were in, finally spotting the problem. His face tightened just slightly. "You could always walk up and smack him."

Edward laughed. "I thought you didn't want me causing any more scenes. Remember that time when that waitress tried to hit on you? The brunette?"

The man shuddered. "Don't remind me. I was apologizing to the manager for weeks. He still won't let us back there, you know."

A shrug. "Their noodles weren't worth it anyway."

"It was a four star restaurant, Ed."

Edward grinned cheekily, leaning forward. "And?"

Roy rolled his eyes, taking a moment to finish up his sandwich before responding. "Nothing—I just know better than to take you anywhere fancy now."

"That's not fair—she totally had it coming, acting like that."

"Are you asking me to take care of this creep for you?" Roy asked, daring to point at the man.

"No!" Ed pouted. "I'm perfectly capable of handling him myself, you know."

"So handle him. I don't like that look."

Unable to help it, Edward giggled. "You're jealous."

Rather than answer, Roy just scowled—and a quick glance over his shoulder revealed why. The man had gotten up, and was now headed over to their table.

"If he touches you—" Roy began, finishing the threat too quietly for Edward to hear.

A tap on his shoulder, which was rather unnecessary considering the fact that Ed was already half-turned towards the man. He looked up, confronted with sneaky, ice blue eyes and a startlingly ginger beard.

"Hey, sweetheart, a pretty girl like you—"

"Oh fuck no!" Edward didn't need to hear the rest of the freak's pitch—that was more than enough. "Are you stupid? I'm a guy, dumbass!" Behind him, he heard the telltale sound of Roy holding back laughter—evidently he didn't feel overly threatened anymore.

The bearded man leaned back, startled as Ed jumped out of his chair. "B-but you looked like you were with him—and you look like a girl—" His words were stopped with a satisfying crunch, courtesy of Edward's fist on his jaw.

"You son of a bitch!"

A waitress came up, looking nervous. "Um, sir…?"

"Leave him," Roy suggested, still chuckling. "It's easier for everyone that way. I promise I won't let him destroy your property."

Ed was barely aware of this guarantee—he was still shouting. "How in the hell do you mistake me for a woman!? You see any boobs here? What, long hair means female now, is that it? And as for Roy, I am with him—how does it feel, knowing you were about to hit on a gay guy?"

"Sir, I'm really going to have to ask you to—"

"I know," Roy sighed, placing his hand on Edward's shoulder. "C'mon, Ed, I think you've scared him enough."

Grumbling and glaring, Edward nevertheless allowed Roy to lead him out of the establishment and back into the car. Once there, his anger deflated. "Sorry," he muttered.

"Nah, he had it coming to him," Roy responded lightly. "Plus, that one was pretty funny—and you stopped. Last time I had to pin you down."

"I keep telling you, I did that on purpose—I just wanted you on me." Edward grinned at the memory, relieved to not be in trouble this time.

"Uh huh, nice try." Roy leaned over from the driver's seat, pressing his lips to Ed's temple. "You're adorable."

"I'm not adorable!" Edward whined. "I swear, if one more person mistakes me for a girl—"

"What are you honestly going to do?"

"Shove my dick in their face."

"Bullshit—as tough as you are, you know you're too shy to do that," Roy laughed.

"I know," Ed sighed. "But it's nice to dream."

"You can stick your dick in my face, if you want?" Roy suggested.

Flushing—he would never get used to Roy's blatant way of saying things like that—Edward smacked the man lightly on the arm. "Later—for now, let's just get back to business."

Any traces of Ed's bad mood disappeared when they stepped into the hotel ballroom. "Holy shit," he whispered. "It's huge."

Roy coughed, muttered, "That's what you said last night."

"Stop being such a horny bastard and focus," Edward hissed. "What do you think?"

Even as he asked Roy, Ed looked around, trying to decide how he felt about the ballroom. Would it work for the reception to the wedding? The room was obviously big enough to hold everything—but something about it didn't sit quite right with Edward.

"The ceiling!" he blurted. "The ceiling is too high, that's what it is."

"What do you mean?" Roy asked, craning his neck to look upwards.

"Well, it'd be cute—yes, cute, don't look at me like that—to have lights on the ceiling, you know, for a star theme—but with a ceiling that high, it'd be hard to see them, right? Less effect."

Roy nodded, still staring upwards. "I didn't think about that…I'm kind of glad this place doesn't work, though. It'd be a pretty long ride from the arbor to here, something closer would be better…"

Edward pulled their crumpled list from his pocket. "The closest place to the arbor was that one club—"

"We aren't going there."

"Why not?"

The man gave a short laugh. "You must have been daydreaming—we passed it up on the way to lunch, it was covered in graffiti, and was just really run down."

"That's also a no, then…what about the other ballroom, then? That's still further, but at least closer than this one…"

"You're going to run into the same problem with the ceiling there, Ed."

Edward huffed, sticking his tongue out as he thought. "What about Werster Hall?"

Roy considered for a moment, before taking his hand and leading the way out of the ballroom. "It's worth a look."

"Yes. I like this one."

"We've barely walked in the door, Ed."

"So what? I can tell." Edward glanced around. "It's clean, it's nice and simple so we can decorate, and the ceiling is low—and it's close. What's wrong with it?"

Roy rolled his eyes. "We should at least get to the actual room being rented, instead of just the foyer."

"Point taken." Ed led the way this time, pulling Roy behind him as he made his way to the back of the hall. Once he spotted the right door, Edward sped up, pulling it open impatiently.

They were silent for a moment, taking in the simple design, the perfect emptiness of the room, the sparkling, midnight blue tiling…

"Oh!" Edward squealed. "The tiles! Come on Roy—you have to admit, that's pretty much perfect."

"Okay, okay, you did good." The man gave him a quick squeeze, which Ed accepted for a moment before escaping back out the open door. "Ed, where are you going?"

"The front desk—we still have to book this place, you know."

With that, Edward took off through the corridors, Roy close on his heels. He skidded to a stop in front of the front desk like an eager child.

"Can I help you?" the woman asked, smiling.

"Yes, we're getting married on May sixteenth, and wanted to know if we could book this place for a reception that night," Roy answered, much more composed than Edward.

"Sure thing—although I must say, this one looks awfully young to be getting married."

Ed huffed. "I'm seventeen."

The secretary shook her head. "And already getting married—well, congratulations to you. It's not often you find your soul mate so easily."

As Edward grinned, Roy threw an arm around his shoulder, pulling him close. "There is just one thing—our wedding is late at night, just before sunset. Ideally we would still have the reception right afterwards, but if you aren't open all night…"

Already waving her arm, the woman reassured them, "Oh no, we're used to having late receptions; we don't close until two in the morning, is that late enough?"

Ed nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, should be!"

He looked up to see a beaming Roy. "If we could book the hall for May sixteenth, that would be great."

"Right you are…" she typed for a few seconds, concentrating on the computer screen before her. "What's the name?"

"Roy Mustang."

"Alright, Mr. Mustang, I've got you down."

Edward couldn't help but let out a stifled giggle, nudging Roy in the side. He was ignored—which was probably a good thing. "Thanks!" he chirped, smiling at the secretary.

"No problem; good luck with the wedding planning!"

As they exited the building, Ed had to wonder about her parting words. "Why does everyone think this is so hard? I mean, you always hear about people having a hard time organizing weddings, but so far this is almost too easy."

Roy snorted. "Well…considering how difficult everything else—everything normal—is with you, it kind of makes sense that something like this would be easy."

Scowling, Edward punched him in the arm. "Shut up!"

A kiss on his head. "Oh, calm down. You know I love you. You're a pain in the ass—but I wouldn't have you any other way."