"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"
Edward laughed as he entered Roy's office, which had been decorated to fit the occasion. The crew had been hiding behind couches and the desk, but he couldn't say he was surprised. It was his birthday, it wasn't that hard to figure out why he'd been summoned away from his usual workstation.
Opening his arms in an invitation, Ed grinned as Roy stepped forward, swooping him up into a kiss. He giggled at the wolf whistles of Havoc behind them, having long since gotten used to the reactions to their public displays of affection.
"Break it up, you two!" Hawkeye demanded after a moment, rolling her eyes good naturedly.
"Yeah, can we get to the cake?" Alphonse asked, eyeing a box on Roy's desk.
Ed glanced at the man, curious as to why his birthday cake was shut away like that—and hoping it wasn't already lit. That would be a major fire hazard. "It was them," Roy explained, holding his hands up. "I only just saw it now, so don't blame me when you open it up…"
More intrigued than ever, Edward strode over to the desk, his hands hovering on the sides of the box. Sure, he wanted to know what the big deal was—and to eat the damn thing—but the sniggers from Breda, the nervous flush to Fuery's face, they made him nervous. Whatever, he'd might as well get it over with.
Feigning confidence, Ed pulled off the lid of the box, only for his vision to be assaulted by the alarmingly bright cake. He blinked, taking in the vivid rainbow coloration, the ring of white (thankfully unlit) candles on the edge of the cake…and the words. They were hastily, unskillfully scribbled on, which made Edward suspect Havoc or someone had written them, rather than a baker. That wasn't really surprising; he wasn't sure any self-respecting chef would write "you can fuck legally now" on a perfectly decent cake.
Despite his bravado, Ed couldn't prevent a blush from rising to his cheeks as he took it all in. He gaped, trying to find the words… "What the hell?"
Havoc stepped up to the plate, shrugging unabashedly. "Be honest, Ed, that's what you're really celebrating."
Edward shook his head, laughing. "You dipshit, I'm celebrating the fact that I can now legally marry Roy, not fuck him!"
"Same thing, really."
"How about we just light it up and eat it?" Falman suggested, not looking entirely comfortable with the situation. Really, he probably just wanted to slice the cake so that it was no longer readable.
But regardless of the reasoning, Ed wasn't about to argue. Freakish as the decorations might be, the cake itself was bound to be delicious. "Alrighty."
Roy snapped, setting the candles ablaze. The team started singing the traditional birthday song, while Edward thought about what he was going to wish for. It was hard to say—everything in his life seemed impossibly perfect at the moment. Alphonse was safe and healthy, he was going to get married to Roy, he was surrounded by all his friends…asking for anything else almost seemed too greedy. Still, he couldn't waste a birthday wish, and so he settled on the one thing that nagged him every once in a while—the dress.
I wish that I could wear that thing in peace. That no one would snigger, so I can just concentrate on my big day, Edward thought, as hard as he could, blowing out the eighteen candles to a round of applause.
Hawkeye pulled a knife out of nowhere, handing it to Ed while Roy opened a drawer to reveal plates and forks for everyone. Slowly and methodically, Edward cut out eight neat pieces of cake—red velvet on the inside, yum—saving the one with the big, fat, "fuck" scrawled across it for himself. Hell, if they were going to give him a cake like that, what else was he supposed to do.
The group migrated to the couches, sitting and laughing as they all stuffed their faces. Ed was midway through his second slice when Falman got up.
"Hey, where you going?" Edward called out, hurriedly swallowing his mouthful so he could speak clearly.
"Presents," Falman replied simply, opening up a closet and carefully pulling out a bag of gifts.
Ed blinked, watching as he brought the bag over. "You didn't have to get me anything. The cake was enough…"
Snorting, Havoc responded, "Don't pretend you aren't excited. Hey, why don't you open mine first?"
Smiling despite his feeble protest, Edward reached into the bag, digging through the gifts until he found Havoc's, a large package with a much smaller one taped messily on top. "Open the little one," the man advised, smirking.
A feeling of foreboding washed over Ed as he obeyed, pulling the smaller package off and opening it—as it turned out, the feeling wasn't wrong. In his hands, Edward found a (notably unpackaged) bright, offensively red…ball gag. For the second time that day, Edward gaped, his face heating up as the team hooted.
"You should see your face!" Havoc gasped, clutching his side. Even Hawkeye chuckled at Ed's expression.
"I take it this is a joke," Edward breathed, regaining his composure. "You're going to kill me, one of these days…" Despite his alarm, Ed shoved the gag in his pocket before heading for Havoc's bigger, hopefully real gift. If he had any luck, the team would assume he was just going to toss it later, when really Edward was a little curious. He tore into the wrapping, pulling out an intricate silver photo frame, with the words "Just Married" scrawled across the bottom in black script.
A smile stole across Ed's face as he pictured himself and Roy, laughing in their wedding clothes, preserved in the frame. "Hey, man, this is nice. Thanks."
"Anytime," Havoc grinned back, inclining his head in a sort of bow.
"You should probably open mine next," Breda interjected as Ed reached into the bag for his next gift. "It kind of goes along with that."
Curious, Edward pulled out the second largest package, huffing at its weight. Carefully he pulled off the wrapping paper, then the top of the box, to reveal another photo frame, this one large and black with spaces for several pictures. The only thing was, they were already full, not of generic stock photos, but of candid pictures of Ed and Roy. There they were, laughing at a café, coming home after a long night, Roy lazing around the office on the phone with Edward, Ed blushing one of the few times he had stopped by as Roy squeezed his ass… "This is terrifying."
Breda just laughed. "Nah, you know you love it."
"I didn't say I didn't like it," Edward agreed, raising his eyebrows, "but it's still creepy. You've been following us around!"
"Nah, I helped him with this one, Brother," Alphone explained.
"Only you would help someone stalk me, Al," Ed grumbled. Nevertheless, he placed the photo frame gently beside him on the couch and reached back into the bag. "How about…this one!" Edward pulled out a tiny little package, neatly labeled with Hawkeye's name.
"I should probably explain," she said, as Ed opened the package to find a little paper flower. "That's not the gift, obviously. I just figured, with all the wedding plans, it would be nice if someone would help out, so my gift is that I'm going to pay for all the flowers for the wedding."
Edward was astonished, and rather touched. That was sweet and meaningful, plus she was right, it would be very nice to have even just a little bit of the price handled by someone else. Slightly misty eyed, Ed beamed up at her. "Thank you so much, that means a lot."
The woman nodded, a faint smile on her face, and Edward dove back into the bag, almost empty now, to pull out a large, squishy package. "Who's this from?"
"Me," Falman replied, raising his hand. "Go on, open it!"
Never one to back down from such a fun order, Edward ripped off the paper and allowed a throw blanket to fall out, dark blue, exquisitely soft, and embroidered in the corner. Ed read it aloud, "Edward Mustang," and couldn't hold back a giggle. That quickly gave way to full on laughter, and he leaned sideways into Roy, slapping the man on the knee. "You know, I hadn't even thought about changing my name! It just never came up."
"Of course you're changing your name," Roy replied brusquely. "I have to show my ownership somehow."
Edward smacked the man on the arm before looking back to Falman. "Thanks man—now I have time to get used to having a new name!"
"It sounds kinda funny," Alphonse muttered.
"Shut up!" Roy hissed. "Don't make him decide to keep his old name! Besides, that's just because it's new. A few months after the wedding and you'll think 'Elric' never fit him as well as 'Mustang.'"
"I think you might be a bit biased…"
"You two shut up!" Havoc interrupted. "Ed, go ahead and open the next one."
Rolling his eyes at Roy and Al, Edward leaned over, his head and shoulders disappearing as he grabbed Fuery's gift, the last one in the bag. Wasting no time, he opened the package hastily, revealing a book: How to Tame Your Husband.
"I hate you guys…" Roy breathed, barely audible over the sound of Ed's guffaws.
"Are you kidding, this is gold!" he gasped, eyes tearing up. "Thanks, man!"
"Sorry, Colonel," Fuery murmured helplessly, grinning at Edward. "I saw it in the store and couldn't resist."
Shaking his head, Roy rose from the couch. "Moving on. Ed, don't worry, me and Al have gifts for you too, it's just that they require a bit of explaining."
"Explaining?" Edward asked, his mirth quickly replaced by a sort of foreboding. This was supposed to be a celebration, and Roy seemed so…serious.
"Yeah. Don't worry, it's just…they need to know anyway, okay? It's about…wedding attire."
In an instant, Ed knew what Roy was going to say—though he had no idea how that pertained to his present—and he flushed crimson, from his chin to his hairline. "Roy, no! I mean…can't it wait?"
"What's the point?" the man questioned gently. "They're going to find out eventually, and it's best they aren't surprised on the wedding day."
"What do we have to know?" Hawkeye snapped, brow furrowing.
"Nothing bad," Roy reassured them, turning to the team. Edward buried his face in his hands, unable to face coming clean. A disturbing ringing started in his ears, but it wasn't enough to drown out Roy's explanation. "It's just about what Ed is wearing to the wedding. It's…not a tux."
"What else could he wear?" Havoc asked, confused. "It's not going to be casual, is it?"
"No, no. It's…well, it's a little unorthodox, and I'm only telling you because Ed wanted to do it, but he almost decided not to for fear you all would judge him. So…please don't over react, but Ed is going to wear a dress."
The silence in the office was offensive, almost painful. Edward couldn't bring himself to look up, instead staring down at the ground. Finally, Fuery of all people spoke up. "You really thought we'd make fun of you?"
"Yeah," Ed rasped, glancing up hesitantly. "I mean, I'm a guy. Wearing a dress. It's prime material for you guys to joke about."
"I for one am not that surprised," Havoc asserted. "You're gay as fuck, cross dressing isn't that far of a stretch."
"As long as you're happy, it doesn't matter," Hawkeye added.
"And besides, Ed, even we aren't mean enough to tease you on your big day. The day after…well, no promises," Breda said, winking.
Breathing much easier now, Edward beamed around at all of them. "Thanks, guys. I have to admit, I was a little worried. Guess I'm just paranoid."
"So what's the dress look like?" Falman asked.
"I can't say," Ed replied. "Roy can't know until the day of the wedding."
The man huffed, walking over to his desk. "Yeah, Ed's being Mr. Secretive about it. Whatever, at least now you can open me and Al's gifts."
"Ooh, do mine first, Brother!" Alphonse squealed, clapping his hands in excitement. "You're going to love it!"
"Alright, alright…" Edward accepted the first of two boxes from Roy as the man sat down. This one was rather flat and packaged carefully. Ed opened the lid, and a breathtaking, silver necklace blinked back at him, blue stones shimmering. It was terrifyingly feminine, which explained the need for Roy to reveal the dress, but Ed couldn't wait to put it on. "Holy shit, Al. This is…beautiful."
"I'm glad you like it," Alphonse beamed. "I thought the colors would match nicely, since you didn't have any blue on you yet…"
Unable to find words, Ed stood to hug his brother, sitting back down on the couch after a long moment. He was still a little spellbound, glancing repeatedly at the necklace, as Roy handed him his last present.
"This one's a little personal," the man breathed in his ear. Edward chuckled—it wasn't like he hadn't already been bared to the world. Still, when he opened the box to find a lacy, white and sky blue garter, he had to rethink his choice. It was pretty, but at the same time, the thought of wearing it…well, it had Ed blushing again, and Roy kissed his cheek with a victorious smile. For the second time in as many minutes, the room was quiet, and this time it was Hawkeye who broke the silence.
"Ed, you're going to be more feminine than me."