AN: I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Edit: small changes have been made as of 9/9/22
Disclaimer: I only own my Oc.
Recap- "Oi, where do you think you're going?" Bofur asked, mixing some ingredients.
"To do something you dwarves seem to know little of." She said light-heartedly.
"And what might that be?" Bofur questioned.
"To bathe." Offense was taken by some, others laughed it off. Also heard a few say something about never seeing an elf as filthy as her. She shrugged that one off though, one hundred percent true most of the time.
The first stars were beginning to appear in the setting sky and the dwarves were preparing for their meal and then for bed.
End recap
Dwarves. Curious creatures. Ill-mannered, but they do not mean to cause offense. Warriors, not very quick or agile but their brute strength greatly make up for that weakness. From what Valaira has seen of the thirteen dwarves, most seemed friendly. Except for Thorin and the tattooed one, Dwalin.
Valaira stretched out in the small lake she found and listened to what the dwarves were saying after she made sure they all stayed put and didn't try to sneak a peak while she was in the water.
"He's been a long time."
"Who?"
"Gandalf." She had a feeling he was trying to find the hidden pass to Rivendell.
"He's a wizard! He does as he chooses. Here, do us a favor: take this to the lads." Bofur handed two bowls to Bilbo.
"Stop it, you've had plenty." Bombur was trying to get his third helping.
Valaira began scrubbing the grime out of her hair.
"Twice like a barn owl, twice like a brown-once like a brown? Are you sure this is a good idea?"
"Mutton yesterday, mutton today, and blimey, if it don't look like mutton again tomorrow."
"Argh! Blimey! Bert! Bert! Look what's come out of me 'ooter! It's got arms and legs and everything." She paused her scrubbing, these new voices the creatures she heard earlier.
"What is it?"
"I don't know, but I don't like the way it wriggles around!"
"What are you then? An oversized squirrel?"
"I'm a burglar- uhh, Hobbit."
"A Burgla-Hobbit?"
"Can we cook `im?
"We can try!"
"He wouldn't make more than a mouthful, not when he's skinned and boned!"
"Perhaps there's more Burglar-Hobbits around these parts. Might be enough for a pie."
"Grab him!"
"It's too quick!"
"Come here, you little... Gotcha! Are there any more of you little fellas `iding where you shouldn't?"
"Nope."
"He's lying."
"No I'm not!"
"Hold his toes over the fire. Make him squeal."
/
Valaira rushed out of the small lake and wrung her hair out before putting her clothing and weapons on. She heard some commotion going on not too far off from where she was so she began to head in the direction from where the noise was coming from. But something stopped her.
/
"Drop him!"
"You what?"
"I said, drop him."
"Bilbo!"
"No!"
"Lay down your arms, or we'll rip his off."
"Don't bother cooking them. Let's just sit on them and squash them into jelly."
"They should be sautéed and grilled with a sprinkle of sage."
"Is this really necessary?"
"Ooh, that does sound quite nice."
"Untie us, you monsters!"
"Take on someone your own size!"
"Never mind the seasoning; we ain't got all night! Dawn ain't far away, so let's get a move on. I don't fancy being turned to stone."
"Wait! You are making a terrible mistake."
"You can't reason with them, they're half-wits!"
"Half-wits? What does that make us?"
"Uh, I meant with the, uh, with, uh, with the seasoning."
"What about the seasoning?"
"Well have you smelt them? You're going to need something stronger than sage before you plate this lot up."
"What do you know about cooking dwarf?"
"Shut up, and let the, uh, flurgaburburrahobbit talk."
"Uh, th-the secret to cooking dwarf is, um—"
"Yes? Come on."
"It's, uh-"
"Tell us the secret."
"Ye-yes, I'm telling you, the secret is … to skin them first!"
"Tom, get me the filleting knife."
"If I get you, you little-"
"I won't forget that!"
"What a load of rubbish! I've eaten plenty with their skins on. Scuff them, I say, boots and all."
"`e's right! Nothing wrong with a bit of raw dwarf! Nice and crunchy."
"Not-not that one, he-he's infected!"
"You what?"
"Yeah, He's got worms in his … tubes."
"In-in fact they all have, they're in-infested with parasites. It's a terrible business; I wouldn't risk it, I really wouldn't."
"Parasites, did he say parasites?"
"We don't have parasites! You have parasites!"
"What are you talking about, laddie?"
"I've got parasites as big as my arm."
"Mine are the biggest parasites, I've got huge parasites!"
"We're riddled."
"Yes, I'm riddled."
"Yes we are. Badly!"
"What would you have us do, then, let 'em all go?"
"Well..."
"You think I don't know what you're up to? This little ferret is taking us for fools!"
"Ferret?"
"Fools?"
"The dawn will take you all!"
"Who's that?"
"No idea."
"Can we eat `im too?"
"Oh, get your foot out of my back!"
"Where did you go to, if I may ask?"
"To look ahead."
"What brought you back?"
"Looking behind. Nasty business. Still, they are all in one piece.
"No thanks to your burglar."
"He had the nous to play for time. None of the rest of you thought of that."
"They must have come down from the Ettenmoors."
"Since when do mountain trolls venture this far south?"
"Oh, not for an age, not since a darker power ruled these lands."
"They could not have moved in daylight."
"There must be a cave nearby."
"Where's Valaira?" Gandalf scanned the faces around him.
"Haven't seen her since dinner. Said she was having a wash."
"It's been hours since then."
"She probably left us." Thorin grumbled.
But it wasn't long until they did find her.
"Found her!"
"What's she doing? She's not moving."
Bofur found her standing still in the middle of the forest, not moving, not blinking.
/
She felt her body freeze up and felt her mind float away from her body. Then Manwe had appeared before her.
"Oh, it's just you. How many times do I have to tell you that a warning would be nice? I was just having a bath you know."
"I know. Be glad I did not chose to speak with you while you were vulnerable."
"Why do you have to make it creepy? This isn't the best time you know."
"Yes, I know. You remind me quite often. But we have a problem."
"I am a little busy at the moment."
"For someone as old as you, you act quite childish."
"You bring out the best in me." He sighed dramatically at her.
"The dwarves reclaiming their homeland is of little consequence. This is much worse."
"Let me guess, Sauron is back."
"He is." She sighed.
"I had a feeling…But how? He was destroyed."
"His ring survived."
"It was lost in time."
"It has been found. Evil is spreading once again, I can feel it. But something is clouding my vision. I need you to be my eyes."
"Why must you always pick on me to do your bidding?"
"What else have you to do?"
She crossed her arms at him. He never played fair.
"I do not have anything to do because you will not let me."
"If I do not keep you busy, you always manage to get yourself into trouble."
"If by trouble, you mean have fun…" She sighed. "What will you have me do?" No point in arguing with him.
"Continue your journey with the dwarves for now, I will be in touch when need be."
"You are a pain in my backside, you know that right?"
Manwe just smiled. Valaira shook her head and scoffed.
"Are you like this with everyone you speak too?"
"Of course not. I am not nearly as tolerant with them."
"Tolerant? I am the one tolerating you."
"My point exactly."
"What?"
"Let us just say that no one ever speaks to me like you do." Truth was, Manwe and Valaira had gone through so much that she looked to him as a father figure. The teasing came naturally.
"Can I go now? I have a strange feeling that I am being watched."
"You are. Farewell."
"Namárië." (Farewell)
/
"Gandalf what's wrong with her?" They had been calling out her name, and poking her but nothing was working. There was an invisible barrier protecting her.
"I am not certain." This wasn't one hundred percent true, Gandalf had an idea of what was happening, he just had never seen it before. Someone speaking with the Valar.
Valaira's conscious returned to her body. And like almost every other time this happened, her balance would be way off and she fell on her backside. She blinked rapidly and shook her head to clear her foggy vision. She was being stared at by thirteen dwarves and a wizard.
"I know you are dwarves and all but staring is considered rude where I come from."
"Perhaps you'd like to explain what just happened?" Thorin grumbled.
"What are you talking about?"
"You were standing there for a good ten minutes. Unmoving. Like a statue." Dwalin cut in.
"I was preoccupied." She waved it off. "So what did I miss?"
"Oh nothing really, let's be off shall we?" Gandalf lead them off.
Everyone was whispering about what had transpired. Some suspiciously, others curiously.
"Why does everyone stink of troll?" Her face wrinkled in disgust.
Valaira regretted asking that. An uproar of tales of the nights events were shouted at her from all directions. Something about almost being cooked and eaten by trolls but then Bilbo was smart enough to stall until dawn and the trolls were turned to stone.
"Trolls? Here? Strange." A foreign feeling of uneasiness flooded through her mind. Manwe did not like the sound of that.
"Indeed. We believe they have a cave somewhere near the mountain."
And that's where the company headed to next.
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