Well, theicemenace and I agreed to a little 'Black Velvet' challenge. She's had hers up for a few days- and I haven't read it yet- and here's mine. Hope you like. Now I'm off to read Ice's…

Word count in the 639 word range.

No beta.

"He has resisted all of our attempts to gain information from him, Prefect."

Rodney kept his eyes open and stared daggers at the two men before him. At least that was what he was trying to do. It felt more like he was making ga-ga eyes at them than actually glaring. Whatever they had given him was some weird shit. Weird shit in a needle. Weird shit in a dirty looking needle. Weird shit in a dirty looking needle that burned like hell.

Rodney took a deep breath that did absolutely nothing to clear the fog in his head and came to a startling realization: it was pink. Weird pink shit in a dirty looking needle that burned like hell.

He was glad Sheppard wasn't around to see and hear this.

He couldn't remember how he'd gotten separated from his team- one second he was verbally sparring with Sheppard about his gravity resistant hair and the next he was strapped in a chair and given the weird pink shit. Then his mind clouded over. He tried to look into his mind to find the pertinent information that would help him get out of this, but it was just like trying to see through a cloudy Vancouver sky…

"The drug we've given him should have forced him to talk about whatever we ask," said the first guy. He reminded Rodney of Vincent Price for some reason. Maybe it was the mustache, or the voice. Or both.

"And he doesn't?" asked the Prefect, a short plump guy that looked a lot like Danny DeVito, only he spoke with a refined British sounding accent.

"No, Prefect," Vinny replied. "Whenever we ask him anything , even his name, all he talks about is something he calls 'black velvet'." There was a brief contemplative pause. "It must be very important to him."

A smile came to Rodney's face, a smile so wide that it nearly hurt his cheeks. Through the cloudy Vancouver sky in his mind a shaft of brilliant light appeared and he could focus on it with sparkling clarity: the woman he adored more than anything appeared in the light, with big brown eyes and golden hair framing a beautiful round face that smiled when she saw him. She floated towards him, her blond hair, luscious pink lips and pale skin a glaring contrast to her attire: a strapless long dress made of black velvet that hugged her supple curves in all the right places. And the gloves! The gloves that covered her slender fingers and sheathed her arms up past her elbows…they felt so good against his skin when she touched him.

Rodney sighed as she neared him, the feeling of warmth radiating from her chasing all the cloud away until he was sitting only in her sunlight. She licked her lips as she reached towards him, and he felt a jolt of electricity surge through him when the tips of her fingers touched his naked chest.

Hey! Where'd my shirt go?

Her gloved hand moved down his chest, down his stomach until…

"RODNEY!"

Rodney jerked awake to find a disturbing lack of Jennifer, and John Sheppard kneeling in front of him with a mixed look of rage and concern upon his face. His voice held only a hint of worry as he said, "Hey there, buddy. Don't worry…we got ya."

Rodney looked around to find Teyla and Ronon pointing their weapons at Vinny and Danny who were literally shaking in their boots. Ronon looked like he really wanted to shoot someone.

Before Rodney knew it he was being lifted to his feet, and with his arm slung around Sheppard's shoulder for support he was heading towards the door leaving Danny, Vinny and the weird pink shit behind him. He was going home, home to Jennifer.

And her black velvet dress.

A/N: "Black Velvet" was written by David Tyson and Christopher Ward. It was recorded by Alannah Myles and released on her 1989 self titled album.