Edward couldn't remember falling asleep the night before, nor could he remember waking up that morning. All he knew was he was getting married in a few short hours and no other thought could keep him occupied.

Now, Ed stood in the shower, shaking like a leaf and trying to control himself. But how could he? HE WAS FUCKING GETTING MARRIED! Completely unable to keep himself in check, Edward let out a little squeal of pure excitement. It wasn't the first to escape him, and he highly doubted it would be the last. Putting in more effort, Ed took a deep breath. He still had three hours. Two effing hours—before they had to leave for the photos Troy wanted to take of him alone. But at least at that point Edward would be doing something, rather than just waiting around.

Still trembling, Ed ran his hands along his body, checking to see if he could feel any problems. No stubble anywhere, no cuts that he could feel, no sensitive bruises—somehow, he'd managed to remain uninjured in the past week, so he wouldn't be blemished. Fingernails trimmed down with actual clippers for once instead of his teeth. Hair freshly washed. Everything seemed in order.

"Brother!" Alphonse shouted from the hallway outside. "Hurry up and get out, you're going to shrivel up like a raisin."

"I'm coming, I'm coming…" Hurriedly, Ed twisted the knobs, halting the water flow. He shivered and grabbed a towel.

Once he was dry, Edward walked out of the bathroom, his eyes immediately jumping to the clock on the wall. Ugh. He'd only been in the shower for fifteen minutes. What was he supposed to do with all the remaining time?

Jittery, Ed threw on some pajama bottoms and walked out to the living room where Alphonse sat munching a sandwich. "You want one, Brother?" he offered.

"No, there's no way I could eat anything right now," Edward replied, bouncing lightly on the soles of his feet as he paced the room. "I'm too keyed up. And a little nauseous."

"Why nauseous?"

"I dunno," Ed answered, rubbing his eyes. "The waiting is killing me. Plus the actual fact of this is starting to set in and I'm nervous as fuck. Like, I'm about to walk down the aisle in a dress. So there's that. And it would be just like me to fall or something."

"Brother, you're ridiculous," Al sighed. "Such a drama queen. You'll be fine."

"I still have an hour and a half," Edward groaned, flopping onto the couch face first. "I'm going to go insane."

"Well, how long do you think it will take you to get ready?"

Edward did some quick calculations in his head. Say five minutes to get the dress on, one for the shoes and necklace, five minutes to make sure his hair was perfect, but he wanted a solid fifteen minutes extra just in case it was harder to make a ponytail that was actually neat that he expected—oh, and maybe all of a minute for his surprise. "27 minutes."

Alphonse just stared at him for a moment. "You're getting married, and you're not going to put some extra time in to getting ready?"

Lifting his head out of the cushion, Ed looked at Al blankly. "That is extra time; it usually takes me all of five minutes, tops, to be presentable."

"Fine," his brother said, rolling his eyes. "That means it's just an hour you have to wait."

"It's too long," Edward whined, pushing his face back into a pillow. "What am I supposed to do for an hour?"

Al thought about it for a moment, rolling ideas around in his head. "Here, come sit on the floor. I'll be right back," he ordered, jumping up and running to the back of the apartment. Ed grumbled, but did as he was asked—it wasn't like he had anything better to do, after all. He had just gotten settled on the ground when Alphonse came back, holding up a hairbrush.

"What."

Deciding not to answer, Al sat back down on the couch behind Edward, and, grabbing a chunk of his hair, began to run the brush through it. Ed couldn't help but let out a little hum. This was unexpected, but really, it felt quite nice. Almost calming, though to be fair, he doubted anything could calm him down right then. Plus, his hair would be all soft for the wedding, now, softer than he had planned. Smiling, Edward allowed his brother to keep brushing for several minutes in silence, before he couldn't keep it in anymore. "Al, this is really fucking gay."

His brother snorted, careful not to yank Ed's hair as he laughed. "Right. Coming from you. The guy who's about to get married…in a dress…to another guy."

"I didn't say it was a bad thing, I was just pointing it out."

They lapsed into silence again, Edward trying to let the flow of the brush relax him, but he couldn't help looking at the clock every few minutes (seconds), the butterflies in his stomach growing with every stupid tick tock.

"Okay, Brother, I know you still have an hour to go, but I think you ought to go ahead and get ready," Alphonse murmured, finishing his task with a flourish. "You're about to punch the clock, I can tell. Besides, I have to get ready as well."

Smiling sheepishly, Ed stood, running his fingers through his hair, startled by how incredibly sleek it was. "Whoa. I don't think my hair's ever been this soft…thanks, Al."

"No problem, Brother," Alphonse chirped, grinning. "Go ahead, go get the dress."

At the words, Edward shot off like a rocket down the hall to Al's guest room. He had barely closed the door before he stripped down to nothing, tossing the pants aside. Breathing a little jerkily, Ed grabbed his bag and dug around inside, pulling out his surprise for Roy. Seeing them made him flush with embarrassment, but still…the thought of Roy's face…shuddering, Edward pulled them on, followed by the garter. It rested on his thigh, tight and secure. Then…the main event.

Ed slipped the dress from the hanger gingerly, stepping into it with care. He couldn't help but laugh, as he pulled it on—it still felt a little surreal to him. Still, the feel of the fabric was nice, and the skirt swooshed as he turned, walking back down the hall. "Zip me up?" he requested. Alphonse, who had been waiting, did so deftly.

"Go put the rest on while I get dressed, I want to see you!"

Edward wasn't about to argue, shaking with anticipation as he was. He darted back to the guest room, rather delighted with the way the dress felt as he moved. It swayed and almost bounced, making him feel like he was floating. Ed caught sight of himself in the mirror, and stopped, beaming. Yes, this had been a good choice.

While he was there, Edward figured he might as well do his hair. He ran careful fingers through it, separating bangs from the rest more neatly than usual. If any day mattered, today was it. Slowly, he pulled the back portions away from his face, bunching them high on the back of his head. Ed leaned away, snagging a white hair band from the tabletop before twisting this way and that to see if he could spot any bumps in his ponytail. Nothing. With exaggerated caution, he pulled the hair through the band, twisting it and repeating the action before pulling it tight. Excellent. The hard part over with, now, Edward ran fingers through his bangs, settling them around his face.

Okay. Shoes.

Those were easy. Balancing carefully on one leg at a time, he pulled on his socks, then the white boots, taking extreme care not to scuff them. Standing up straight once more, Edward turned, pulling his necklace out of his bag and wrapping it around his neck. With some difficulty, he latched the back, spinning around to face the mirror again as soon as the clasp was closed.

The finished result was…surprising. Edward was beautiful, that was the only word to describe it, but he was also shocked to find that he still looked like himself. He had expected to feel like a completely different person, all sparkle and feminine charm, but…he was just Ed. Ed in a dress, yes, but it was still him. And the glimmer made him look fucking fabulous. Shimmering fabric flowing around him, hair sleek and shiny, boots adding just a touch of toughness, necklace glinting in the light…hell yeah.

Grinning so hard it hurt his cheeks, Ed practically skipped out of the room, almost running into Alphonse (pulling his belt through the loops) in the hallway. His brother stepped back, nodding in approval. "You look great, Brother."

"Don't insult me," Edward scoffed teasingly. "I'm stunning."

Al rolled his eyes, buttoning up his waistcoat. "You know what I mean. Really, it's…amazing. Don't hit me, but you're pretty." He looked up from his task, smiling faintly. "Roy might have a breakdown when he sees you."

"Really?" Ed squealed, twirling around. "Oh, I hope he cries. That sounds awful, but fuck I hope he cries. Not a lot, just a little tear."

"That's almost cruel," his brother chided, leaning against the wall to pull his shoes on. "But I think he will."

Edward struggled for breath for a moment as reality set in. "I think I'm going to pass out," he gasped as Alphonse held out a hand to steady him.

"Brother, inhale, exhale, you can do this."

"Al, this is terrifying."

"Breathe!"

A little dizzy, Ed tried to take deeper breaths. "Can we go?" he asked weakly. "I know it's early, but I'd rather wait there."

Slightly alarmed, Alphonse nodded. "So long as it helps you stay standing. Please don't faint during the wedding."

"Thanks for that, Al, that doesn't make me nervous at all."

Suddenly, Alphonse placed his hands on Edward's shoulders. "Brother. Look at me. You're in the military. You get in fights, you kick people's asses, you face danger like it's nothing. You can handle an itty bitty wedding."

That was true. Ed inhaled slowly, trying to put himself in the mental state he was in when out on the job. Calm, focused, confident in his ability to handle this. "Okay. Okay, I think I'm good."

"Alright. Let's go."

When Troy arrived at the arbor and saw Ed waiting there, the former let out a long, low whistle. "Damn, kid. Roy's one lucky bastard."

Edward beamed back, more steady now that he was breathing in fresh air. "Thanks—you don't think it's too much? Me in a dress?"

"Nah, it's perfect."

"Excellent!" Ed jumped excitedly, once, clapping his hands together. "Okay, so, photo time?"

"Definitely—any idea where you want them taken?" Troy asked, unzipping his camera from a bag hanging from his shoulder.

Edward shrugged helplessly. "No idea. I don't know anything about photos, I told you."

Troy laughed, looking around them. "How about that little grouping of trees over there? I have a little sheet you can stand on so you don't mess up your boots, and it's not far from the pavement…I just like how the sun is starting to set behind the branches."

"Sounds good!" Ed agreed, scampering off with Troy lagging behind a little. "Hey, you alone today?" Edward asked after a moment of thought."

"Oh, no—I came alone to do these shots, but I've got a partner coming for the actual wedding. A different guy, one who's a little more homo-friendly," the man responded, gazing around absentmindedly at the scenery.

"Oooh, much better," Edward approved. "He was so quiet."

"Well, to be fair, that's how most people want their photographers."

"But that's so boring."

Troy only laughed, stopping Ed with an outstretched hand. "Here, right here. Let me just…" He rummaged in his bag for a moment, pulling out a small, vaguely grass colored sheet. "There we go." The man flung it out, letting the sheet settle on the ground. "Okay. How about you pose sort of…sort of like, most everything we can see is your back, only then we get your face and realize you're not a woman?"

Snorting at the idea, Edward agreed, stepping onto the sheet. Troy bunched it up, then, arranging it around his feet so that it was out of shot. "Okay…okay, turn a little to your left. Perfect!" Click. Picture taken.

They continued in this breezy manner until cars started to arrive in the parking lot not far off. The more people that came, the harder Ed's heart beat, until he felt as though it would leap right through his chest. His marriage was ticking closer and closer…and he was feeling a bit lightheaded again.

"Alrighty," Troy said, just as the sun started to disappear behind the horizon. "That should be good—besides, it's about time for you to get going, huh?"

"Yeah," Ed replied faintly. "I, uh, have to meet up with Granny…" He gulped, palms suddenly uncomfortably moist.

"Hey, kid," Troy reassured him, clapping him on the shoulder. "You'll be fine. Trust me, this is going to be the most amazing day of your life no matter what happens, because today you get stuck with a guy you're totally crazy about. Congrats, Ed."

Smiling nervously, Edward turned to the parking lot and began to walk towards where he could just barely see Pinako waiting. This was it.