Author's Note: Three more chapters and an epilogue left. Then we continue on into the sequel! I wrote like 40 pages in two days for the end of this story. I have no idea where it came from. I typed so much one day my fingers and arms were aching when I was done. I think I burned through my keyboard.
-109-
Ryll stood in the empty temple, the cold air sending shivers across her skin. Morgana was gone. There were no signs of her or the white dragon. Something had sent her off in a hurry, and she had left no indication of where she'd gone. Had she really decided to give up? Ryll had thought she was making progress, but now she wasn't sure.
The sound of horses approaching sent her hurrying into hiding. Owl was smart enough to make herself scarce when Ryll gave a short, bird-like whistle. She climbed a tree wondering who was coming toward the temple. A small group of men approached carefully. They fanned out and surrounded the building before entering. One held a bit of white substance in his hand. Ryll squinted but couldn't tell what it was at this distance. After a few minutes, the men reconvened outside.
"She's gone," the man holding the white object said. "This cursed thing led us wrong." He threw it on the ground.
"How do you track a dragon through the air?" another man asked.
"You don't," the first man growled.
"We'll have to tell Sarrum-"
"No! You heard him. We'll end up in that pit if we come back empty-handed. A dragon can't disappear. We'll find them." They receded back into the woods but one boy lingered. He had curly black hair and pale skin. He turned his head and looked straight at Ryll. She froze, hardly daring to breathe. Those eyes… Where had she seen those eyes before? Then it struck her. She nearly fell out of the tree as she recognized the boy she'd seen sink his sword into Arthur's heart. She waited for the boy to give her away, but he shifted his eyes to the white object on the ground and then back to Ryll. Then he turned and walked away without a word. Ryll waited until she could no longer hear the men and climbed down from the tree. She ran over to pick up the object, running a finger over it. There was no mistaking the dragon scale. What had the man meant when he'd said the thing had led him wrong? Was it enchanted to find Morgana? And who was Sarrum? They'd mentioned a pit. Ryll put the pieces together. Sarrum was the king who had captured Morgana and Aithusa. He was responsible for their torture.
"Where'd the damn thing go?"
Ryll fled as she heard voices coming closer. She hid behind a tree and watched as the men came back for the piece of scale.
"I threw it right here!" The man dug around in the dirt. Ryll pocketed the scale. "It's gone!" His eyes searched his surroundings. Ryll stayed still. "Someone must have taken it."
"A bird probably made off with it. You shouldn't have thrown it down," another man said. "We'll find another way to track her. It didn't lead us right anyway."
The first man continued to look around the clearing, but finally he gave up and they disappeared into the woods again. Ryll let out a breath and went off in search of Owl. She found the mare waiting for her a few yards away and mounted, galloping back toward Camelot at top speed. She took a detour toward the druid's camp before reaching the city and found Byron.
"What's wrong?" he asked. They'd been in touch a few times after she'd first reached out to Morgana, but he'd made it very clear he thought she was wasting her time. He'd done his best to be happy for her and Merlin when Ryll had shown him the ring, but she didn't miss the tiny bit of regret that passed through his eyes. She wished he'd move on; she didn't want to see him hurt because she hadn't chosen him.
"Morgana's gone. She left in a hurry and people are after her. They're working for King Sarrum. He's the one who captured Morgana before. He had this scale enchanted to track her." She handed Byron the white scale.
"It is enchanted. I thought he hated magic though." He frowned.
"I think he's desperate enough to do anything. He wants his prize back." The thought sickened her. "She must be flying with Aithusa, but they can't run forever."
"So what do you want to do?"
"I'm still working on convincing Arthur. He didn't completely shut me down, but he's still bitter and betrayed. I think Morgana feels the same way. They've both admitted how stubborn they are. Runs in the Pendragon family, obviously. I just feel like this is going to come to a head sooner than later, and I don't think they're ready yet."
"Maybe it's time to accept that you've done the best you can," Byron told her. "Can't you just be happy? You're going to be married in a month. You can't be chasing Morgana around when you have a husband. Merlin might begin to suspect something, and he'll certainly notice when you're gone. I'm surprised he hasn't forced it out of you yet."
"He trusts me," Ryll retorted. "He's not going to force anything out of me."
"When are you going to tell him? You can't keep secrets if you expect your marriage to work. Marriage is about mutual trust and respect. Keeping this from him isn't trust or respect. It means you don't trust him to go with your decision."
"I do trust him with all my heart, and how can you say I don't respect him?" Ryll asked, hurt.
"Ryll, I know more secrets than he does. You say you keep it from him to protect him, but really you're just avoiding the inevitability that you'll disagree and he'll try to keep you from doing what you want. What happens if he finds out you've been seeing Morgana from someone else other than you? What happens if he finds out you're supposedly destined to die for Arthur and you haven't bothered to mention that?"
"Why are you being like this?" Ryll asked. "This isn't about me!"
"Isn't it? You're so determined that you're the only one who can change Arthur and Morgana's destinies. Maybe you aren't supposed to be in the middle. Maybe your interference is what brings about the outcome you see in your dreams."
Ryll took a step back from Byron. "You think I'm meddling?"
He sighed as if he'd reached the end of his patience. "I'm tired of being dragged into this strife between Arthur and Morgana. I'm not in this because of them. I'm in this because I care about you. I don't want to see you die. The way I see it, the more you interfere, the more likely you are to get yourself killed. And don't start on the destiny reel. I've heard it enough. I'm not convinced it's not just a deceitful Sidhe putting ideas into your head."
"I thought you of all people understood, but I guess I was mistaken." She backed away from him. "I'm sorry if I've inconvenienced you by seeking your help. I won't make that mistake again."
"Ryll, don't go. This isn't how this conversation was supposed to go."
"No? How was it supposed to go? Was I supposed to give up on Morgana and Arthur, leave them for dead just so I could have my happy ending? I'm tired of everyone telling me that we can't all live. I'm tired of happy endings depending on someone else's death. There's nothing happy about that." She turned on her heels and left the camp, ignoring Byron's words. She made it halfway to her room back in Camelot before the frustrated tears came. She found a quiet niche in the corridor and slid to the floor, burying her head in her hands.
Maybe Byron was right. Maybe she was trying too hard to change too much. She didn't have the power to save everyone or change the future. She was just one girl who dreamed of death too often. Maybe she should take whatever happiness she could find and run away with it. Maybe she was the one setting herself on a path that led away from Merlin. That was the last thing she wanted. But she also didn't want Morgana or Arthur to die just because she gave up and pursued her own happiness.
She finally wiped her tears away and pulled herself together. There was one thing she did have control over and that was her life. She had a wedding to plan. She squared her shoulders and went in search of Gwen. Today she would think only of happy things.
…
Morgana huddled in her cloak, shivering despite Aithusa's proffered warmth. The fall had grown old and weary, giving way to winter's predatorily chill. She had lost track of how long she'd been running, but she'd never felt further from home. She'd been making her way north, but suddenly it didn't feel right. Something tugged her back south toward Camelot. She hadn't dreamt of Mordred again, but now as sleep overcame her mind, her dreams came more vivid than ever before. The mist had cleared, and she could see what would come.
An army had gathered across from the knights of Camelot. Red cloaks swirled like rivulets of blood though no blood had been spilled yet. Morgana and Mordred stood across from Arthur and Ryll stood between them, arms outspread like she could bar the hatred between Arthur and Morgana. She looked so small standing there, golden hair bright against the dim day. She'd always thought she could shoulder the fate of the world.
Morgana looked across to the army and saw the king who had captured her sitting astride a great warhorse. He had come for her, and he wouldn't care who got caught in the crossfire.
The scene skipped ahead and suddenly they were in thick battle. Morgana was fighting with Arthur now against Sarrum's men. Merlin and Ryll were there too. She heard a shout and something thick and black came shooting toward them.
Morgana jolted awake as if the arrow had sliced straight through her dreams. She was breathing hard, trembling at the thought of death. She didn't want to die yet. She wasn't ready to put a finality to her life. Aithusa nudged her arm with her snout, and Morgana stroked her.
"It's all right," she told Aithusa. "We're going to be all right."
…
Ryll stood watching the first of the snow fall on the city below. The air bit at her skin, but the castle had felt too confining tonight. She had thought she was alone, but then Arthur leaned against the parapet next to her. "How is the planning going?" he asked.
"Well I think. Gwen has ideas, but I don't want anything extravagant. I think it will be perfect though."
"I've been thinking about what you said before," Arthur said after a pause. "About forgiving Morgana." Ryll turned to him. She hadn't expected the subject to come up again. "Despite everything, Morgana is still my sister. I didn't always agree with my father and the way he did things, but I still loved him because he was family. Morgana has made bad choices along the way, but I can't help but think I could have been more supportive. I should have noticed something was wrong. I could have done a lot of things differently. If she can prove she's ready to change – ready to stop trying to seize the throne and kill me – then I'm willing to offer her another chance. I'm willing to forgive her."
"I think she is willing to change," Ryll said. "I think she's been lost and alone all this time even if she didn't realize it."
"Have you…have you spoken to her?" Arthur asked. "Since you rescued her?"
Ryll took a deep breath. "I tracked her," she said, being truthful. "I tracked her because I wanted to try to convince her that this path she was on would only get her killed. I realized that I didn't want to stop fighting for her because then she would truly be lost. No one is truly lost unless everyone gives up on them. I know I should have told you, but I knew you weren't ready to forgive her yet. Sometimes trying to play peacekeeper between two people you care about means betraying the trust of one, but believe me when I say I've done everything to try to save you both."
"What do you mean?" There was no anger in his tone, so Ryll forged on.
"I've seen you die, Arthur. In my visions. I've seen Morgana die too. It seems like that's the outcome no matter what happens in between. I don't want to see either of you die, so I'm trying to save you both."
Arthur stared at her for a long moment. "Ryll, you are the most valiant and noble person I've ever met, but you don't have to fix this. None of this is your fault. This is between Morgana and me, and if I die for Camelot in the future then I die with purpose."
"Camelot needs you alive, Arthur. There's a difference between being a hero and sacrificing yourself needlessly. I feel like I was brought to Camelot for a reason. I befriended both you and Morgana and now I want to fix this whether it's my fault or not. Maybe it's my destiny."
"Your destiny is to be with Merlin. To be happy." Arthur took her hands. "You've done enough. You never give up on your friends, and I have so much to learn from you. I wouldn't blame you if you decided to leave Camelot and join Morgana."
"Why would you say that?" Ryll asked, surprised.
"Because things haven't really changed here, have they? You revealed your greatest secret to me because you trusted me but instead of changing things so that you truly have a place here, I've simply ignored the parts of you I don't know how to deal with. You have magic. I can't just ignore that. It's a part of you which is what you were trying to tell me before. It's a part of Morgana too and though she never gave me the chance to accept that, I'm not sure I would have been ready to. I might have turned her away in fear and disgust."
"You've never looked at me that way even when you didn't know how to handle the truth," Ryll told him. "You have a kind heart, Arthur. Follow that first. Traditions can be changed as well as laws. Your people trust you; trust yourself."
"Thank you," Arthur said before turning to leave. "For being honest and for never giving up on me."
Ryll watched him leave, a subtle hope tugging at her heart. That night her dreams cleared like the sky after a storm and she saw a different future.
Arthur and Morgana were facing each other on a grassy plain. A group of knights stood behind Arthur and Merlin was by his side. Mordred was standing next to Morgana, and Ryll stood between them like a barrier. The sound of stomping feet and the whinny of horses drew Ryll's eyes toward the west. An army waited there with a cruel king sitting astride his horse. She knew that face – it was the king who had imprisoned Morgana and Aithusa. Two sorcerers stood beside him and even as Ryll watched, they sent a shoot of magic straight toward them. She watched in slow motion as it came straight toward where Morgana and Arthur were standing.
Ryll jolted awake, sitting up straight and breathing hard. It was the clearest dream she had had in a long while, but she still didn't know how it ended. All she knew was that something had changed because this was nothing like the dreams she'd had before on the battlefield. This time Mordred hadn't stabbed Arthur. But someone still died. She didn't know who the intended target was though. Sarrum wanted Morgana dead, but it could just as well be Arthur he wanted dead. She didn't know if this future was better than the one she'd seen before, but she'd proved one thing: you could change the future if you tried hard enough. Whatever the outcome of that dream, she was going to make sure Arthur and Morgana did not die.