WOW, okay, guys, real talk here for a moment. I honestly can't express how sorry I am for how long this took to post. I've seen a lot of comments about me being out of school and how I should have time for this now...and that's true. But while finals were definitely pressing me for time, they weren't the main reason I wasn't writing. It was personal. For the past several months, I've been struggling with depression and anxiety, and it was only getting worse. It was only a little while ago that I finally got some help, and so I think I'm doing betting now. Of course, I still have ups and downs, and the downs are really serious, so please forgive me if I'm still a little lagging in the update department. It's just extremely hard to 1) find the energy to write when all I want to do is curl up and sleep and 2) hard to post anything when I'm doubting myself and convinced everything I write is shit. It's really hard to express exactly how awful I've been feeling lately, but suffice to say it's been getting in the way of me writing anything at all. I do think I'm doing better, at least for the moment, and will be wrapping this story up soon. Again, I apologize for the absence-I hope you all can understand, and I hope you enjoy this chapter you've been waiting so long for.

Roy, who had apparently taken a liking to surprising Ed, refused to tell him where they were headed for their second excursion. Instead, Edward had only been told to dress casually, as though he ever did anything else. He wasn't upset at all by the secrecy—Roy's surprises did tend to be rather enjoyable—but his nature didn't allow Ed to just be calm and quiet about it. No, he was an irritant, and that meant he was going to spend their walk through this river town (much larger than the last)pestering Roy to see if he couldn't get his husband to spill the beans.

"Pleeeeaaase tell me?" Edward tried, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he walked.

Roy didn't even turn his way, which made sense, considering this was the tenth or eleventh time Ed had repeated himself."Nope."

"Come on. Why's it have to be a surprise, anyway?"

"Because I love to hear you beg," his husband replied, a grin pulling up one corner of his mouth. Edward only rolled his eyes—he hadn't seen that coming exactly, but it was only to be expected that Roy would let slip an innuendo or two in this situation. Still, it was clear he wasn't getting anywhere with outright asking. Time to try something more roundabout.

"How do you even find these places anyway?" Ed questioned, reaching over to link their hands. "I mean, these are tiny towns, so how do you plan what to do here ahead of time?"

"It's not that hard. I called the cruise company and got a list of our stops, then looked up what to do in these towns."

Another thought came to Edward, momentarily distracting him from his quest. "When do you find time to do all this?"

At that, Roy laughed aloud, throwing his head back in a sudden fit of mirth. Gradually, he calmed, his laughs turning into mere sniggers as he said, "Sorry. It's just funny—the Lieutenant has a sixth sense and she can always tell when I'm sleeping on the job. It's a pain in my ass, actually…but she apparently can't tell the difference between me doing legitimate work on the computer, and doing BS research. And cat videos. And porn."

"What!?" Edward spluttered, his cheeks heating up. "Did you just lump planning our honeymoon and porn…?"

Another chuckle escaped Roy's mouth as he lifted their intertwined fingers to pat Ed's head. "Gotcha."

Grumbling, Edward almost stumbled, not realizing they had reached some steps. Still, all that training hadn't been for nothing, and he prevented a fall—and escaped with only the tiniest smirk from Roy. It was only then that he paid attention to the building they were entering.

"A spa?" he remarked, more than a little incredulous. It seemed like a rather feminine thing to be going and doing…although, Edward had recently done things that were a lot more feminine than entering a spa, so he supposed he would live. Even so, it felt strange. The inside air was lightly fragrant, smelling faintly of cherry blossoms. It was a relaxing scent—of course, that was probably the point.

Ed waited as Roy introduced them to the woman at the front desk, not really paying attention as they were led down the hall into a more secluded room with two massage tables waiting in the middle. He only zoned back in once the woman was gone, and Roy started to strip.

Oh. Right. That whole wearing-nothing-but-a-towel thing.

Sighing lightly, Edward followed suit. "So…a spa. What made you pick this?"

Roy shrugged. "I figured after wedding stress and then more strenuous activities here, a relaxation day wasn't a bad idea. You're not disappointed, are you?"

"No, just caught off guard," Ed reassured him, wrapping a towel around himself and hopping onto one of the massage tables. He noted, with some irritation, that his feet hung above the ground. "I'm on guard whenever you say you have a surprise, see. Usually it's more explosive."

"Holy shit I've made you cautious," Roy remarked, his face a mocking mask of shock as he stood up—sans towel.

"Cover yourself up," Edward said with a sly smile. "Or we're going to end up with something explosive again."

Roy winked, but picked up a towel and wrapped it around his waist. Just in time, too, because right then two Xingese women opened the door and walked in. They seemed a little tightly wound for people who made others calm for a living, with their hair pulled up in sever ponytails and their white uniforms crisp and clean.

"Please, lay on the tables, sirs," one of them began. "We will we starting with a traditional massage."

Edward did as he was told, swinging his legs up and lying on his stomach, face pressed into the pillow waiting for him. He turned his head to face Roy, smiling at his husband, but his grin disappeared when he felt one of them women place her warm hands on his back. She was just massaging his shoulders, but it was weird. After a moment, Ed realized why, and he couldn't hold back a giggle.

"What's funny?" Roy asked, his eyes already half closed.

"You're isolating me too much," Edward accused jokingly. "I'm around you so much, it feels weird for other people to be touching me like this!"

"Good," his husband responded, sounding satisfied—though Ed couldn't say whether that was due to the massage, which was admittedly beginning to feel very nice, or what he had said. "This is a one-time shot. After this, you're mine again."

Though he couldn't see her face, Edward somehow knew the woman massaging him was smiling at their conversation. "Possessive," he snorted, letting his eyes slide shut.

"Yeah, yeah, you've told me before."

Slowly but surely, Ed's attention dwindled, until all he really noticed was the patient, methodical, soothing movements of the hands that traveled down his back, skipping his ass—Roy had definitely made sure they weren't touching his rear end, jealous bastard—and eventually rubbing the tension out of his calves. And though he hadn't felt tense before, Edward was n absolute pile of mush when the massage finally ended.

"Next," one of the woman announced, "we will be performing a practice called cupping. This promotes blood flow and healing." She didn't say anything else, though Ed could hear her moving about. Cupping? He'd never heard of it. Curious, now, he cracked open an eye to see what the women were doing. Moving in synchronization, they pulled out a series of glass jars, and stuffed paper inside each of them before setting them on the tables next to Ed and Roy. The women then grabbed matches and, walking towards them again, grabbed the first glass and lit the paper inside on fire. Okay. So, this was definitely new. If Edward didn't trust Roy so much, he'd have thrown a fit.

Slowly, the paper in Ed's jar burned up, and as soon as it had disappeared completely, the woman attending him flipped the jar upside down onto Edward's back. He inhaled, sharply—the glass was hotter than he had anticipated, but it was more an instinctive scare than anything. It wasn't quite hot enough to actually harm him. This process was repeated with each of the jars, until six were placed on his back. The sensation was strange, though Edward felt better now that he'd figured the technique out. The heat in the jar created a vacuum, and he could feel his skin being pulled up into the glasses. Glancing at Roy, he laughed—his husband looked like he was growing suckers on his back.

"We'll be back in ten minutes to remove the cups," one of the woman announced, before they both exited the room.

"Do you think we're allowed to move?" Ed asked immediately.

"Why?"

"I want to see if I can pop these off," he replied, trying to sound as innocent as possible. Judging by Roy's expression, the man didn't buy it.

"We're supposed to be relaxing," his husband drawled, "and the first thing you want to do is mess up the treatment."

"I wouldn't be messing it up," Edward argued, "just…expediting it. Besides, I think it'd feel cool to be stretching and suddenly this cup comes popping off your back."

"That sounds disgusting!" Roy groaned.

"But satisfying."

"You just sit still. It's ten minutes. You can do this."

And Ed supposed he could, although the longer the cups stayed on, the more he itched to get them off. It wasn't uncomfortable, it was just that he was insanely curious as to what it was going to feel like to have the jars removed. With the way his skin was being pulled, he thought it was going to be something like taking a breath after being underwater for too long. Wonderful.

Soon enough, the women came back. Edward wiggled on the table, alive with anticipation. His attendant grabbed the first cup— —with a slightly disturbing sucking sound, it came off and holy fuck that feeling. Ed would do this again just for that. The release. He hummed in appreciation as each one came off, disappointed when it was over.

"That's it for today, sirs," one woman stated with a small bow once everything had been put away. Edward sat up immediately, stretching and sighing at the newfound looseness in his body. "Unless," she added, "you'd like to sign up for some acupuncture?"

"Ahahaha…no," Ed replied firmly. "Not for me."

"Then have a lovely day," they said in unison, bowing once more before leaving to allow Roy and Edward privacy in which to dress.

"This was a great idea," Ed admitted, still stretching as he hopped off the table. "I feel so…light. Hey," he said suddenly, lifted his fists. "Fight me. I bet I can kick your ass, the way I am now."

"Hmmm…" Roy murmured, leaning forward to whisper in Edward's ear. "How about a sword fight instead?"

Flushing, Edward's mind immediately went to the possibilities that were opened with the extra flexibility he'd have from the massage…the naughty, naughty possibilities. Suddenly, he couldn't get his clothes on fast enough. "Race you to the cabin!"