John absentmindedly checks the time again. Two hours ago, when Sherlock texted him, he told Sherlock to call when he got home so that John could go over. Instead, John's gotten almost all the way finished with his part of the anatomy project just waiting for Sherlock.
He sets his phone down on his desk again and continues working.
Another hour goes by, and just as John's about to save and print his report, his phone rings.
He answers it without thinking any more of it.
"Hello?"
"John? John, it's Clement."
John laughs. He's about to say he knows, that he has caller ID, but Clement cuts him off.
"Is Sherlock there? Is he with you?"
John actually stops and looks around his bedroom. It wouldn't be the first time Sherlock is there without making himself known.
"Uh, no."
"John, seriously, if he's there please tell me."
"He's not, sir, I promise."
Clement sighs loudly. John immediately feels scared.
"He's…he's not home?"
"No," Clement says.
John leaves his project and stands from his desk. "I'll be right over. I'll go look for him."
"Thanks," Clement says right before he hangs up.
John rushes over to the Holmes residence, and he tries to will away any panic he has. He tries to rationalize, assuming Sherlock probably just wandered off and forgot to let anyone know where he is. Maybe he went for dinner with Lestrade and didn't mention it.
When he goes into the house, Lestrade is there.
Oh, crap, John thinks.
"John!" Lestrade cries, spotting him first. He rushes over and place a hand on John's shoulder. "When and where was the last time you spoke to Sherlock?"
"In person, this afternoon. He said he was going to Danielle's to work on their project, but after that he sent me a text saying he was leaving your office."
Lestrade runs a hand through his hair. John can tell he feels solely responsible for being unable to find Sherlock.
"John," Clement starts now, "Do you have Danielle's number? Can you call her and ask if she's seen him? Call Olive, Harvey, anyone?"
John nods. He takes his phone out while looking around. "Where's Dec?"
"He, Ellery, Duke, and Dane are out looking for him."
John nods in understanding, then clicks send to call Danielle.
"Hello?" she answers, confused.
"Danielle, hi it's John Watson. Listen, uhm, have you seen Sherlock this afternoon?"
"Mmm, no," she says. "He said he had a family thing to deal with and told me he'd work on his part of the project alone tonight. He said he'd come over tomorrow, though."
"Okay," John says. "If you happen to hear from him, can you please tell him to call one of us."
"Alright…" Danielle says. "What's going on, John?"
"Nothing, we just…he's…well…we can't actually find him, so…"
"Oh dear," Danielle says. "Anything more I can do to help?"
"I don't think so," John tells her. "Just let us know if you hear from him."
"I will. No problem."
"Okay. Bye, then."
"Goodbye," she says, then John hangs up.
He immediately dials Olive's number.
And she doesn't answer.
"Come on…" John mumbles under his breath and redials.
"Watson, what?" she answers now. "I'm a little busy."
"We can't find Sherlock," he blurts out.
"What?!"
"We can't find him, he's not here, his phone is off, nobody's seen him for hours. Have you? Is he with you? Have you texted him or anything?" John can hear the panic in his own voice.
"No, no…John, you need to calm down—"
"I can't bloody calm down!" John yells, tension seeping out of him only to build more. "We don't know where he is, who he's with, if he's safe, and you know as well as I do that he's been playing chicken with a bloody murderer for the past month! How dare you tell me to calm down!"
In the back of his mind, he knows he shouldn't yell at Olive, but part of him knows Olive's the only person who won't hold it against him tomorrow for shouting.
"Okay," Olive says. "Alright. Where are you? Are you at Sherlock's?"
"Yes."
"We'll be right over, okay? We're only a few blocks away."
John takes a deep breath. "Okay. Thank you."
He hangs up without saying goodbye. Then, he goes through his contact list and calls everyone he can think of who might know where he is. Paris, Harvey, Lily, Taylor, Jenna, even Brady, but nobody knows where he could be. Everyone offers to help, but John just tells them to call if they hear from Sherlock.
Olive arrives in minutes, and John's surprised to see her wearing a dress.
"We were on a date," Lane explains, but he doesn't sound angry by the interruption.
"I'm going to borrow some clothes from Sherlock, then we'll go out to look for him."
John nods and Olive disappears upstairs.
When she gets back downstairs, now wearing a pair of Sherlock's jeans and one of his rarely worn t-shirts, she and Lane take off to join the rest of the search party.
"Make sure everyone splits up," Clement tells her. "There's a lot of ground to cover."
"Yes sir," she says, then her and Lane leave the house.
Lestrade asks John to follow him into the dining room, where he tells John to sit.
"John, you need to tell me everything you know."
"Nothing," John says. "Practically nothing. I…" he glances at Clement, unsure of what Clement even knows, but he goes on. "I know he'd met with the guy, but he didn't tell me anything about it other than he did it."
"So, you don't know about the multiple identities, the texts, the library visit—"
"No, no none of that. But he said the guy was watching him somehow and…oh god."
"What?"
"I knew he should've just called you. I said to him that the guy can't see him make a call, and that he should have called you. But he went to see you and obviously he saw because…because now Sherlock's missing."
Clement is up in a flash and practically shouting at Lestrade. He says he wants to file a missing persons report, he tells Lestrade to have them check all ways of getting out of London (airports, trains, anything). John just sits there, dazed, while everyone around him moves in a hurry.
Clement lets all the kids who want to spend the night at their house that evening, which means all of them stay up all night watching movies and generally trying to keep John happy. There's a tension all over the room, as if none of them know they're allowed to be happy still, but John is thankful that they're letting him show his emotions. He just desperately doesn't want to be alone.
Police officers cycle in and out of the house, meeting with Clement, checking on the kids, and two are parked outside for protection. John doesn't feel scared for himself, he is just worried about Sherlock.
Eventually, as the sun is coming up, most of the kids start to fall asleep in the living room. John gets up from his spot on the sofa and goes upstairs to Sherlock's room.
John walks around the room, looking for any clue that he can find. There are none, of course. It's not like Sherlock kept a secret journal that explained everything in it. Plus, he isn't sure Sherlock would know where Ben could take him.
Eventually, John settles for sitting on the edge of Sherlock's bed. He feels completely lost, empty, and alone.
He sits silently for a few minutes before there's a light knock on the door.
"Come in," he calls.
Olive, of course, steps through. "Hey, you okay?"
John shrugs. "As okay as I can be."
Olive enters the room and closes the door. "Can I get you anything?"
John shakes his head.
Olive moves to sit on the bed next to John.
"I'm scared too," she says. "I told him I didn't want to know about all the murderer stuff. I told him to talk to you about it and only you, but now I wish I'd listened because then, maybe then we could…"
"We still wouldn't know where he is," John says. "But…I don't know. Thanks for that."
"No need to thank me. It's your job to talk to him about this stuff. Not mine."
"What is your job, then?"
"To listen to him bitch about you."
John laughs. "Does he? Often?"
"Well," Olive says. "It's not about bitching about you, it's bitching about you being mad at something he knows he did. I tell him to apologize and he usually does."
"Wow," John mutters. "I, uh…thanks."
"No problem."
John buries his face in his hands and sighs. "I'm just so scared."
"I know," Olive says. "I can't imagine this is easy for you. I know we're all scared, but…none of us can compare to what you feel."
"I feel guilty, though, you know? You all care for him as much as I do, you all offered to be here and to look for him. You all haven't slept all night waiting for him to call or arrive home. You all fear the worst, too. I feel guilty for feeling like…like my fear matters more."
"It does, John. Don't feel guilty. None of us want to show you how scared we are because we know that it's not as much our place as it is yours. But know that you're not alone, that we're all scared out of our freakin' minds."
John rubs his face. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be."
John falls back against the bed.
"Get some sleep, John. I promise, someone will wake you if anything happens."
John just nods.
Olive pats his knee, then gets off the bed and leaves the room.
John can't bring himself to fall asleep in Sherlock's bed. He takes his usual pillow off the bed and gets an extra blanket from Sherlock's closet, then uncomfortably curls up on the floor and falls into a very fitful sleep.