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Chapter Twenty-One

Fin's car pulled up and Amanda shot out first, making a beeline for Olivia, with Carisi close behind. "Oh, God," Amanda said, grabbing Olivia's cheeks in her hands to get a good visual of her face. "What's wrong with her? This is more than just beer."

"Heroin. Not by choice, though," said Elliot, his arm still around her, trying to hold her into a sitting position but quickly growing weary from supporting her. "Help me get her up."

"Why?" said Carisi. "Shouldn't we be calling for a bus?"

"Yeah," said Fin, "She needs medical attention."

"Not necessarily," said Elliot. "She's high, obviously, but as long as she doesn't overdose . . . do we really want her to get arrested, put her career at risk, and cause her to lose her son? She needs care, not punishment."

"What-?" said Carisi, lowering his eyebrows like he wanted to punch Elliot in the face. "This is her life we're talking about, and how would we even know if she took enough to OD?"

Amanda was still kneeling next to Olivia, looking into her eyes with a flashlight, and she said, "I agree with Elliot."

"C'mon, Amanda," said Fin.

"No, hold up, guys," said Amanda, standing now. "I've been around my junkie sister my whole life, taken care of her many times over the years. I know what to look for, and I think she's okay for now. We just need to keep an eye on her, keep her up until she comes down."

Fin shook his head, but Elliot ignored him and said, "Help me get her up." And then he said into her ear, "C'mon, Liv, stand up for me."

But she wasn't moving, the corners of her mouth turned up in a blissful smile, her eyes just slits. Fin got on the other side of her and wrapped his arm around her back, and the two of them lifted her dead weight with a slight groan from each of them. The movement motivated her to speak, mumbling, "It's alright guys. I appreciate you coming out, but you can just leave me here. I just want to lay down."

"No way, Liv. That's not happening," said Elliot.

She was sweating buckets as Elliot half-pulled her into the backseat of the car with Fin lifting her from the curb side. Amanda dug a plastic bag out of the front of the car and handed it to Elliot, saying, "Here, just in case."

Elliot stared at her, but she said, "What? It's her first time—you don't want her getting it all over the back of Fin's car, do you?"

Then she slid in next to Olivia on the other side, watching Liv's face intently, lines forming in her forehead. "She's not real alert," said Amanda to nobody in particular, while Fin and Carisi climbed in the front of the car. "But her color is okay. Pupils are dilated but that's to be expected." She put two fingers on Olivia's wrist, and then leaned in with an ear to Liv's mouth. "Pulse and breathing are slow but not too bad. As long as she can talk, I'm not too worried."

"You really have done this before," said Elliot.

"Yeah, well what can I say. When you have a sister as messed up as mine . . ."

"Stop . . ." said Olivia, not bothering to open her eyes or lift her head off the back of the seat, where it rested against Elliot's arm. "Stop talking, you're ruining it."

Elliot thought about what she meant, his musings interrupted by Amanda, who said, "That's why we're here, Liv—to ruin your high. Better get used to it." Olivia's lips puckered in obvious discontent, but Amanda didn't show any mercy, saying, "You're going to hate me by the end of the night. We can't let her sleep, El. That's when bad things happen."

Olivia didn't respond, and didn't say anything else on the way home, just flopped her head on Elliot, and he wrapped his arm around her and gave her shoulder a squeeze. Fin parked outside her apartment and Elliot helped Fin slide her out of the car. He had already contacted Lucy, who was long gone with Noah. Elliot didn't see any reason for the boy to be exposed to his mother in this state.

By the time they got her into her apartment, Elliot on one side of her and Carisi on the other while Fin parked the car, Olivia was whimpering, and Amanda said, "She must be starting to come down. That's the hardest part."

When they got in the door, she wanted to veer toward the nearest chair, and Elliot started to take her to the couch. But Amanda said, "Let's walk her around, to keep her awake."

"Nooo," Olivia moaned, opening her eyes just enough to glare at Amanda.

Elliot felt for her but followed Amanda's directions, guiding Olivia away from the couch, her arm draped over his shoulder and her body trying to go slack. "C'mon, Liv," he said, keeping a gentle tone to contrast Amanda's. "Walk with us for a little bit. Take a step."

She begrudgingly moved one floppy foot forward, a high-pitched groan escaping her throat. He held her up the best he could, and Carisi joined them on her other side. Together, they kept her up and half-walked, half-dragged her around the apartment for about fifteen minutes, before she said, "I can't . . ."

"Okay, we'll take a break," said Elliot, and they took her to the couch. She flopped on it like a rag doll, but Elliot pushed her up to sitting and whispered, "Don't go to sleep, Liv."

Meanwhile, Amanda brought her some water, helping Liv hold it to her mouth while she dribbled some on her shirt. Fin came up after parking the car, and the four of them took turns walking Olivia around the apartment for the next couple of hours, giving her breaks when she couldn't stand on her feet one more second.

Elliot took another turn with her, hoisting her to standing, but she resisted, shaking her head and going limp. "Come on, Liv," he said, watching her half-open mouth turn into a thin line.

"No, El. Leave me alone." Her droopy eyes hardened, and she slumped back down on the couch. "Too tired."

Amanda squatted in front of her, trying to add some sympathy to her voice. "Liv, just walk a little longer with us. C'mon, don't give up now."

She tugged on Olivia's arm, and Liv found a sudden burst of energy to push Amanda backwards, knocking her off balance, almost to the floor. "Leave me ALONE Amanda!" Olivia growled, lifting her chin to show her gritted teeth at Amanda. "Why are you here? Get out of my apartment, all of you."

She scanned the faces in the room with venom in her eyes. Elliot felt no anger in return—only pity, because he knew she didn't want to be this rabid version of herself.

"Yeah, you're definitely coming down now," said Amanda calmly, standing up now. She looked at Elliot. "She'll be okay now. We just need to keep her awake a little longer, and then she can go to sleep. She needs someone to stay with her. I can do it if—"

"I'll stay," said Elliot, and Amanda cast him a curious glance. Elliot looked at Carisi, who also studied him, wrinkles forming in his forehead.

Amanda glanced at Fin, and then back at Elliot, and said, "It's okay, really. I can stay—"

"Hey," said Fin, stepping toward Amanda to rest a hand on her shoulder, glancing at Elliot knowingly. "I think Elliot's got this."

Amanda shrugged. "Okay, then." She stayed for about another half-hour with Carisi and Fin to keep an eye on Olivia, and then she visited with the limp brunette sprawled out on the couch one last time, squatting next to her to rub her arm. "You'll be okay, Liv."

She looked up at Elliot and said, "Keep her on her side so she doesn't choke. That's important. She's not going to be feeling real good so you'll probably need to keep a trash can next to her. Call me if her heartrate or breathing slows. Liv," she said, looking at Olivia's stone-cold face.

"Mmmm," said Olivia.

"I'm sorry you're . . ." And then Amanda choked up and had to stop, looking as if she might shed a tear. She stroked Olivia's arm one more time and said, "Just get better, okay?"

Olivia didn't answer, and Amanda stood to face Elliot, whispering so Olivia couldn't hear her, "I hate seeing her like this."

"That goes double for me," said Carisi. "Take good care of her, Stabler."

"I will," said Elliot, looking at Fin who was intently watching Olivia resting. "I promise I'll make sure she's okay."