Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Gundam Wing /AC, or do I have any rights to them or make any money from writing these fics. And the same goes for any of the crossovers that appear in this fic.

Prompt: Some of it's horrible (did you hear that s/he slept with), some of it's outrageous (and s/he's breeding Crumblehord Snorkacks) and some of it's downright (not) true (did you hear?!)

Warnings: mentions of threesomes, slash, femslash and het.

Gossip and Sexy Bums

"Why oh why oh why," Harry groaned as he allowed his head to fall heavily to the table, "I should of not bothered getting up this morning, hell maybe I shouldn't of even bothered to come back for my 'eighth' year!"

"Don't be like that mate," Ron said with fake sympathy, "It is a wonderful morning, why just ask Hermione if you don't believe me!"

"Ron!" Hermione snapped back with a glare only for it to fail because of a soft blush covering Hermione's checks, "How did you know about that?!"

"You mean how could we not?" Harry asked with his face still firmly planted on the table, "I think the whole of Hogwarts and even the people down in Hogsmaid heard you."

"Well sorry for having an active sex life," Hermione huffed out as she slammed her fork down on the table, "Both of my lover's managed to get a bit of free time, they do work you know, and-"

"Both your lovers? Wow, you've been a very busy girl," Ron said with a cheeky grin, "I don't know how your still standing after what that Po woman and that Noin woman did to you this morning."

Hermione let out a sharp gasp as her whole face turned bright red, "H-How do you know about what Sally, Lucrezia and I did this morning?!"

"Gossip, you know what the gossip is like in Hogwarts," Ron answered happily causing Hermione's face to become even more red, "Plus you forgot to put up any silencing charms before you three started."

"I-It was not my fault! They both jumped me!" Hermione spluttered only getting a raised eyebrow in reply from Ron, "Oh bugger it! Stupify."

Before Ron had time to react he found himself on the floor as stiff as cardboard unable to move. With a dark look he turned to give Hermione a dark look only to find that she was also giving him a dark look.

"I will deal with you later," Hermione huffed as she turned to Harry and ignored Ron, "What has caused this morning to be so bad Harry?"

"I'm surprised that you have not heard it in today's gossip," Harry mumbled as he turned his face so he was facing Hermione through he kept his head on the table, "Through I suppose you have been busy this morning..."

"Harry..." Hermione said warningly as she raised her wand causing Harry to groan.

"Fine," Harry groaned out, "I bumped into Treize Khushrenada and Zechs Merquise while on my way down to breakfast this morning, they both proclaimed that they have decided to court me."

"I don't see anything wrong with that," Hermione giggled as Harry sent her a sad puppy dog look, "I thought you had a crush on both of them? I remember you being over the moon when the Headmistress announced that they would be staying at Hogwarts for the rest of the year to teach a few classes to those who wished to become aurora's or unspeakable's or even go into the muggle world and become Preventers."

"I am 'mione, I really am," Harry replied with a groan, "I can't believe that the two most sexy men that I have ever seen are going to court me! It is a dream come true!"

"Then what is the problem?" Hermione asked with a huff, "You know I don't mind you being gay, I mean I'm with Sally and Lucrezia and I know Ron is being courted by Neville and Luna to join them both in a threesome."

"It is nothing like that, I have a different problem..." Harry groaned out as he pouted at Hermione while ignoring her confused look.

"Well?" prompted Hermione.

"I can't pick between them! I don't think I ever will be able to pick between the hotness that is Treize and the hotness that is Zechs!" Harry moaned out with a pout, "They are both sexy, and those bums! Just look at those finely sculpted sexy drool-worthy work of art bums!"

"...Harry..."

"...yes Hermione?"

"How about a threesome?"

"HERMIONE!" Harry cried out as he quickly pushed himself upright only to pause and freeze on the spot.

"Harry?" Hermione asked as she resisted the urge to poke her frozen friend.

"That is not a bad idea..." Harry said softly with a faraway look in his eyes, "I'll see you later today Hermione, I have to speak to two hot sexy people."

"Okay..." Hermione said slowly as she watched Harry stand up.

"Oh and Hermione?" Harry said quickly catching his friends' attention, "If you listen to the gossip I'm sure you'll find out what happened to me."

Until the next prompt...