Oh, thank goodness. Finally done. Sooooooo tired right now. Exams are finally here. Well, midterms, but whatever. Don't worry, I don't talk about them much.
Hehehe. You'll never guess who you meet in this chapter. Okay, you're probably all thinking it already, but it's still exciting. I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for an opportunity to introduce this character, and this is the time. If the situation feels a little odd, then too bad. Just go with it, people.
Anyways, you guys are always telling me about how you cry, so I hope you bawl your eyes out at the end. Which reminds me...
Disclaimer: I (obviously) don't own Halo by Beyoncé.
Sakura's POV
"Are you ready for this?" Tomoyo sits next to me, twirling her hair between her fingers anxiously. Watching her just makes me even more jumpy.
"You're kidding, right? I think I'm going to be sick." I clutch my stomach.
"Please don't," Syaoran says from behind me.
"I can't help it! I'm freaking out!" I spin in my chair to face him. "You do realize that it takes only takes one," I hold up my index finger in front of his face, "subject for both of us to be stuck getting up at the crack of dawn for who-knows-how-long to study!" I drop my hand.
"Relax. You're psyching yourself out right now."
"Li is right." Tomoyo pries her hands away from her hair. "We just need to relax."
"Thank you, Daidouji." They smile kindly at each other, making me want to roll my eyes.
These two are always super respectful towards each other. Maybe it's because they're both the children of successful business owners. I wouldn't know. The only thing I do know is that they've known each other for over ten years, yet they're still like this. It is ridiculous.
"We've been going over this material for almost a month now," he tells me.
"Yeah, alright." I take a deep breath. "I can do this. I can do this. I can-"
The classroom door slides open, and Mr. Terada enters the room carrying a stack of papers that looks a mile high.
"I lied. I can't do this."
Suddenly warm air blows against the back of my neck. Even though it isn't that hot, I feel as though I've been scorched. "Relax." The word seems to have the opposite effect, making my entire body go tense. "You're thinking too hard about it. Just do your best."
Right. Well, now I'm not so much thinking about the exam as I am thinking about how much I want to snuggle up in my former arch nemesis's arms.
Damn you and your stupid mind games, Syaoran.
We spend the rest of the week going through a similar morning routine, followed by a day of stressful exams. Thankfully, it's finally the end of the day on Friday. As far as I did on the exams, I'm pretty confident in most of them. Math was the only one that I kept blanking on. I did a lot better than usual, but I'm still not sure if it was enough. Scores aren't given until the beginning of next week.
"This weekend is never going to end," I mumble as I pull on my outdoor shoes.
"You can say that again. How are we supposed to fall asleep with this kind of pressure looming over us." My head shoots up to find Chiharu standing there.
"At least it's not finals, though. Those will probably be twice as bad," Rika says from beside her.
"Rika, Chiharu." I put my indoor shoes back into the locker and shut the door. Turning to face them, I begin, "What are you..."
"I invited everyone to dinner at Twin Bells in celebration of finals ending."
"Oh." By everyone, I assume she means the people she eats lunch with. "Will you still be working?"
"I'm going to talk to Mrs. Matsumoto when we get there." Rika nudges her side. "Anyways, we were wondering if you wanted to join us."
Is that an invitation? Did she just invite me to have dinner with everyone? All I can manage to get out is a very long, drawn out, "Um."
"It's alright if you're uncomfortable. Li seemed fine with it, though."
"No, it's not that," I say before I can even think about it. "I mean, Syaoran and I aren't still..." Aren't still what? Unable to share the same space for more than five minutes? "It's just that with work and the show..."
"That's right," Chiharu remembers. "I almost forgot. We can both talk to Mrs. Matsumoto when we get there, though. In the meantime, do you want to walk with us?" Ah, Chiharu, thank you for knowing what to say when I clearly don't.
"Sure," I say with a smile. Thank goodness I wore normal shoes again today. I've been wearing them all week because my stomach has been too twisted and my nerves too high for me to comfortably stand in my blades.
"Cool. We're going to meet up at the front gate. You ready?"
I nod, and we head towards the front doors. When we get outside, I walk next to Rika while Chiharu races ahead to the gate. In the distance, I can make out Syaoran and Yamazaki waiting there. As we walk up, Syaoran looks over and our eyes meet for a moment before Chiharu speaks.
"Tomoyo isn't here yet?"
"Hey," Tomoyo's cheery voice calls from behind us. I turn around to find her waving at us as she hurries forward. "Sorry I'm late. I had to stop to use the restroom."
"No worries. We just got here, too," Chiharu tells her.
"Perfect." She finally seems to take notice of me. "Sakura, you're here! Does that mean you're going to to eat with us?"
"Chiharu and I are going to talk to Mrs. Matsumoto when we get there."
"Oh. Well, Mrs. Matsumoto is super nice, so I'm sure she'll be fine with it," Tomoyo assures me, gleefully.
I return the smile as reassuringly as I can. Tomoyo's probably right. Although, I'm not sure if I find that a good thing or a bad thing yet. It should be good, right? I'll get to hang out with all of my old friends again for the first time in... Seven years. Wow. It's strange, but for some reason my stomach suddenly doesn't feel too good.
"So," Tomoyo and I walk side-by-side down the sidewalk a few paces short of Rika and Chiharu. "Is there something you want to tell me?"
"You mean besides the fact that I think I'm going to be sick?" I've been having this problem all week. Here I thought that since exams are finally over, I'd be feeling better.
"No, not that. Although, you should really work on your anxiety. All this stress can't be good for you. It'll make you die young." Horrified, I turn to her with my mouth agape. She laughs at my expression and says, "I'm just kidding. Anyways, what I really meant to ask was: what's going on with you and Li? You two have been acting super weird ever since the beginning of this week. Like, even more than usual, which is saying something, because you two always seem to be acting funky now-a-days."
"It's complicated." My stomach does another dangerous flip. "Oh, please tell me we're almost there. I don't think I can take much more of this."
"How are you going to have a meal and talk with everyone if you can't even walk within ten feet of them all without nearly losing your stomach?"
That's actually a really good question. "I have no idea. I could always try taking something for the it."
"I didn't think those usually worked for you."
"Ah, who knows? Maybe I'll get lucky and the placebo effect will be enough."
Tomoyo gives me a funny look. "Placebo effect?"
I groan. Did I really just say that? "That idiot has been filling my head with strange things."
Tomoyo laughs. "Well, at lease he got through to you. Never thought I'd hear something like that come out of your mouth. Although, I don't think it would work considering you already know that medicine doesn't have any affect on you."
"Crap. You're right. What's worse is that I know you're right." I smack my head. "What the heck is the matter with me?"
"You, my friend," she gives me a devilish smile, "are finally learning new things thanks to that tutor of yours." She glances back to where Yamazaki and Syaoran are. "It's quite adorable, really."
"I don't think 'adorable' is quite the right word for it."
She looks me in the eyes. "I don't know if anyone told you, but he's the one who suggested that we invite you."
I stare at her incredulously. "What?" My eyes travel back to Syaoran. At first, he doesn't seem to notice, then tuns to me and gives a small wave. I hastily turn around again before he can catch the hint of pink rising to my cheeks.
"We were all just as shocked. That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about, Sakura. There's something you haven't told-"
"We're here!" Chiharu suddenly shouts, cutting Tomoyo off. I look up to find us just a few feet short of Twin Bells. "Rika, Li, Takashi," she addresses the three who haven't ever been to the cafe. Very dramatically she waves her hands towards the bright, colorful building in front of us. "Welcome to Twin Bells!"
Mrs. Matsumoto agreed to let Chiharu and I have dinner with everyone and start working once we finish eating. I still have my live performance, though. Hopefully we finish by then. If not, then I'm worried that I really will be sick.
Re-entering the table area, Chiharu and I make our way over to the table. When we get there, we run into a bit of a snag.
Yamazaki seems to realize the problem almost immediately. "Oh, sorry about that." He glances around the large, circular table. "If you want, we can-"
"No," I stop him. "It's fine." Ignoring the stares from my companions, I slide into the chair between Syaoran and Tomoyo. Everyone but Syaoran, who seems rather amused, gawks at my calm demeanor. They're all undoubtedly wondering why I just so casually sat down next to Syaoran. Then again, he was the one who suggested I come, apparently, so they really shouldn't be so surprised.
Trying not to appear baffled, Chiharu takes the seat opposite me, between Rika and Yamazaki.
"So," she begins, "what did you all think of those midterms?"
Within five minutes, we're all sitting quietly around the table sipping at our drinks. I try not to glance at Syaoran too often, but whenever I do he seems to sense it, because he is either already looking at me, or he turns towards me as though he expects something. At this point, it's not just my stomach acting flaky, but my rapidly beating heart, too.
"Alright, can I just ask the question on all of our minds?" Yamazaki pipes up out of the blue. We all look at him. "What's going on between you two?" He asks, looking between Syaoran and I, who in turn look at each other. "I mean, four weeks ago, you two couldn't even have a decent conversation without practically ripping the other's throat out."
"Takashi." Syaoran's voice is dangerously low.
"We're all thinking it. I don't mean to be rude or anything, Kinomoto," he says to me in a calm yet curious voice. "I don't mind your being here, but what's with the sudden change?"
I chew my lip in anticipation and glance over at Syaoran.
"Yeah. I wasn't going to say anything with everyone else here, but something's defiantly up." Tomoyo, too? I haven't told her yet because of exams.
"Not going to lie, I'm pretty curious myself," Chiharu states. Syaoran and I finally meet eyes. The others look between us as if trying to figure out what's going on. I'm trying to figure out why we are the center of their attention.
After a moment of desperately begging Syaoran for help with my eyes, he shrugs and says, "We may as well tell them."
"Um," I hesitate, unsure what to say. "Well, to put it plainly, Syaoran and I are-"
"Oh my gosh, are you two are dating?" Rika suddenly bursts out, nearly knocking over her glass of water, but Chiharu reaches out and grabs it.
"Dating?" Tomoyo cries out, her face pale as a ghost.
"What? No!" Where on Earth did she get such a far-fetched idea? Syaoran just shakes his head, unfazed by their antics. "We're just... friends?" It comes out as a question. I look at Syaoran again. Is 'friends' the right word? I mean, it's not as though I mind, but it just sounds so surreal that I can't wrap my head around it.
Syaoran catches my gaze. "Is that meant to be a question or a statement?"
"Um, well, I don't really know what to call it," I admit. Friends usually go out of their way to talk and hang out. We don't do that. I mean, of course we don't, but up until now we weren't 'friends'. Does this mean Syaoran and I are going to start hanging out? That just doesn't sound quite right. Although spending time with him would be nice...
"Kind of strange saying it out loud, but it sounds about right."
"Wait," Tomoyo abruptly interjects. "When did this happen?"
"Um, last weekend at," I gesture to Syaoran, "his apartment."
Tomoyo's brows furrow. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"We were about to take exams! I didn't want to distract you." That's also part of the reason I didn't mention my father to her, either.
"Is there anything else you aren't telling me?" I don't speak, but my eyes say it all. "There is! What is it?"
"Tomoyo, it's kind of... Personal." There's no way I'm about to say something like that with everyone sitting here.
"Too personal to tell your best friend?"
"I don't have to fill you in on every little detail, Tomoyo." I want to stop, but I can't. Every part of my being is telling me that what I'm saying is wrong. "Not like it really matters. You wouldn't understand, anyways." Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
Her mouth hangs wide open. "I wouldn't understand?"
"Yes, Tomoyo, you wouldn't."
Tomoyo's POV
Tears of frustration prick the corners of my eyes. "We tell each other everything, Sakura. How can you even say that?" My throat screams for me not to shout. Other customers are starting to look at us.
"It's complicated, okay?" Sakura lowers her voice. "I'll explain it later, but right now you need to calm down." She turns away from me, and I shove myself up from the table.
"I need some air." Not waiting for anyone's response, I turn and leave.
What is going on with her? She never blindsides me like that. Is this because of Li? I would sure think, but she almost seems too upset for that.
Not having the answers to any of my questions is tearing at my insides. Once outside, I crumble to my knees with tears rushing down my face. I hate fighting with Sakura. Something about it just makes me feel uneasy and sick. Maybe it's because she's my best friend and I never want to lose her, but it's more than that. For as much as Sakura relies on me, I rely on her equally as much.
I'm pulled from my sorrows by a gentle hand on my shoulder. Startled, my head shoots up and I meet with kind, ocean blue eyes. In front of me, with his hand reaching out to touch my shoulder, is perhaps the most beautiful man I've ever seen. I stare up at him, studying his features. Pale skin greatly contrasts midnight blue hair. Ocean eyes are frame by large wire glasses that give a sense of sophistication.
For a moment, I'm so in awe that I forget everything else. Then the man's mouth opens and words come out. "A young lady of such beauty would be better suited with a smile," he says. Is that an English accent I detect?
The man reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a navy handkerchief. As he holds it out to me, I feel my face heating up. I'm too stunned to move for a few seconds. Then my arm lifts itself up on its own and carefully takes the cloth from his hands.
"Thank you," I manage to say, my voice sounding foreign to my own ears.
The man before me smiles, and I feel butterflies in my stomach. "You're welcome." When he removes his hand from my shoulder, I feel the urge to reach out and grab it. "Please be careful on your way home." He turns to go, and I almost stop him, but am still frozen. Much to my dismay, by the time I'm pulled from my awe enough to move, it's too late.
"Um, excuse-" I reach out, but he's already out of sight. With a great sigh, I stand up, look down at the silky blue cloth in my hand. What was I even crying about, anyways? My entire brain feels like mush. The man's accented voice lingers in my ears. Little electricity spikes through my shoulder where he touched it. Who was that? And, more importantly, will I ever meet him again?
As I reenter the cafe, I almost collide with Sakura, who seems to have been frantically pacing in front of the entrance, much to the annoyance of her fellow coworkers. The second she sees me, she grabs hold of my hands. "Tomoyo, I am so sorry that I didn't tell you about it." Words tumble from her lips like a faucet. "I just wan't ready then, but I am now, so I promise that I'll tell you later. Okay?"
Even though I can hear everything she says, the words don't go all the way through. The blue-haired man's face keeps on popping up in my mind. I find myself absentmindedly running my thumb along a crease in the silk handkerchief.
"Tomoyo?" Sakura seems to realize I'm not really listening.
"Huh? Sorry, I didn't catch that."
"I said I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, but I promise to explain everything as soon as we're alone." That's right, we were just fighting, weren't we?
"Oh. Okay, Sakura. It's fine. Sorry I freaked out. It just made me a little insecure that you hadn't told me already."
"I know. Everything I said was lies, Tomoyo. I don't really feel that way at all. You know that, right?"
"Of course I do, Sakura." Suddenly, I feel her arms around me, and the next thing I know, I'm being encircled by her.
"Thank you, Tomoyo. I have no idea how it is you put up with someone like me."
The comment makes me laugh. I don't say anything, though. I don't need to.
Sakura's POV
The rest of the dinner turns out fairly well. At first it's a bit awkward, but after a few lighthearted jokes from Yamazaki, everyone loosens up. Even me. My stomach stops doing that cruel, torturous flipping. It's strange how at home I allow myself to feel while with everyone. It's as though I belong here, with them. They're like my second family. Long lost relatives, catching up. Even though we've been apart for a long time, we don't seem to have any trouble re-adjusting to each-other's presence.
When it comes time for my live performance, everyone is getting ready to order desert.
"Sakura, it's time." That's all that Ruby has to whisper into my ear for me to stand up and excuse myself from the table.
"Where are you going?" I look down at Syaoran. For a long moment, I don't say anything but stare at him.
He's about to ask again, when I tell him, "Just listen; okay?" Without waiting for a reply, I turn to leave.
In the back, I'm about to change out of my school uniform when Tomoyo appears in the doorway.
"What are you doing back here? Shouldn't you be ordering?"
"They'll be fine without me for a little while. I wanted to give you something, actually."
"Hm?" Give me something? All of the things Tomoyo gives me are-
"Here we go." She seemingly pulls a beautiful pink dress out of thin air. "I've been keeping it here for a special occasion, which this sure seems like to me."
"Tomoyo," I smile at her. "Have I ever told you how wonderful you are?"
"Yes. Yes, you have." She ushers me towards the changing area. "Now get changed. I wanna hear what it is you have to say to Li." She winks mischievously, making my face red.
"It's not-"
"Sure it isn't, Sakura. Just get changed."
With one final huff, I stomp farther back into the changing area. Tomoyo sure can be difficult at times. Although, that's just one of the things I love about her.
Five minutes later, I step out of the back room and make my way over to the piano. My eyes wander over to the table as my amethyst eyed friend rejoins our party. Chiharu is the first to see me. When Rika follows her gaze, she waves to me, and I wave back.
Stepping up onto the stage and taking a seat on the piano bench, I feel abnormally calm. Maybe it's because this is something I really want to say to not just Syaoran, but everyone else sitting at that table.
I look up just in time to see Yamazaki whisper something to Syaoran that makes him spin around. It only takes a second for him to zero in on me. Our eyes meet, and after a few very long seconds, I break away from his gaze and my fingers begin to move. I allow my lids to drift shut for a moment as I begin to play.
Remember those walls I built?
Well, baby they're tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make a sound
I think back to all those times I passed Syaoran in the halls and ignored him, or when I was cruel and snapped at him. After he left me that day at the airport, I built up walls around myself to keep him out. I would always tell myself that it was his fault.
I remember his face on the other side of that glass. Those eyes. Those captivating pools of amber. He broke down my entire selfdefense with that one look.
I found a way to let you in
But, I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now
He truly is someone special. No matter how much I wanted to hate him for breaking my heart, I just couldn't. I can't. After all, I did fall in love with him once.
It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm taking
I ain't never gonna shut you out!
I won't. Not again. Finally, I understand that I'm not the only one who has been suffering. It took me way too long to figure it out, but now that I have, there's no way I'm going to let him suffer like that anymore. He doesn't deserve that.
Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby, I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
I've never felt as safe as I do when Syaoran is holding me. If he'd let me, I'd stay curled up in his arms forever. So warm. So welcoming. Like being enveloped by a warm, radiating bubble. Nothing else in the world ever seems to matter while I'm in it. Just that he's there. Holding me.
For those few brief minutes, I allow myself to believe that maybe he loves me, too.
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby, I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away
Now that I really look, I can see it. He's taking everything I say to heart. We both know what I'm talking about. That moment we shared when I looked at him and for the first time, realized he needs me, too.
I can feel your halo, halo, halo
I can see your halo, halo, halo
I can feel your halo, halo, halo
I can see your halo, halo...
Halo, ooh ooh...
Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
It's true. I really can't ever seem to get enough of it. Why does he have to be so... So Syaoran? It just doesn't seem fair.
I swore I'd never fall again
Is that what I'm doing right now? Falling? After all these years, am I really falling for him again?
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget to pull me back to the ground again
It's insanely frustrating how easily I find myself drifting towards him.
And It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm taking
I'm never gonna shut you out!
Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby, I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby, I can feel your halo
I pray it won't fade away
If he ever changed and stopped being the person he is today, I don't know what I would do. A week ago, it wouldn't have had as much of an impact on me, but now that's different. Now I'm...
I can feel your halo, halo, halo
I can see your halo, halo, halo
I can feel your halo, halo, halo
I can see your halo, halo...
Halo, ooh ooh...
Once the song ends, I can hear soft applaud, but none of it really seems to mater. The only thing that does mater is that Syaoran is right there. Watching me, watching him.
I'm falling in love with him all over again.
Alright. Sorry if any of you don't like the song, but it just fit. Believe me, I spent a ton of time deciding what song to use for this story. At the moment, this one seemed to work best.
Eriol! That was him, by the way. And yes, he does have an English accent right now, because he just got back from England. You'll read more about that later, though.
I know I had more to add, but am drawing a blank. It's really late/early, so I should probably just stop talking now.
Thanks for reading.