I LIVE! And have had issue uploading this document. Had to log off and then back on. Weird.

Anyways, sorry it's been so long, guys. Because it has been like forever. I don't even remember... That's a lie. I do remember what happened last time. Kinda had to go back to refresh myself while writing this chapter. Which, by the way, is seriously in need of love. From me. I'm off my game. It's not looking very good. Kinda choppy. Especially near the start. Not sure how much better the next chapter will be. By the way, there will now be two more. That's what I've decided.

If anyone was actually wondering why I was gone so long, I assure you that I didn't abandon you all. Well, I kinda did, but I never forgot. I was focusing my energy on my studies since the year was drawing to a close. And now it's taking me forever to get back into the swing of things. When I get back to my normal writing self, I'm going to have some serious editing to do. For now, though, I'll let you have this so that you know what's happening to the characters you've gotten to know super well (hopefully) over the past 31 chapters.

Sakura's POV

The day of the festival arrives sooner than I anticipate. Ever since my run-in with Syaoran, I've been dreading it. Facing him is inevitable, though, so as I finish tying my uniform in place and step out through the curtain partition separating the classroom, I walk straight up to the brunette with my head held high to mask my insecurity.

"How's it coming along out here? Has anyone shown up yet?"

Syaoran lifts his head from the task of pouring glasses of water. He meets my gaze, then glances down at the outfit I've just finished tugging into place.

"What?" I look down at myself, inspecting for obvious flaws. "Did I put it on wrong?"

Syaoran's head snaps up again, his eyes startled. "No!" he blurts out. I raised my eyebrows. He glances away and clears his throat. "Sorry, no. It's perfect. Daidouji did a magnificent job as usual. As for the customers, there are only two tables taken right now."

I open my mouth to ask if I can help, but he beats me to it. "They're already being waited on." He must see the disappointment on my face, because he adds, "Don't worry, the festival only officially opened half an hour ago. People are still making their way through the outdoor stalls. We'll have more customers show up the later in the day it gets."

I sigh and lean back against the table behind me. "Yeah, I guess so. Hey, do known when 3-C is starting their class play?"

"Not a clue. Takashi said something about it starting later, though. I think around noon, maybe."

"Darn. During the lunch rush. Figures." Pushing off from the table, I silently pull the curtain aside to see into the seating area and let it fall before asking, "Where's Tomoyo?"

"Off with Hiiragizawa still, probably. He swung by before you got here and they left to see some of the stalls before it gets too crowded."

I walk back over to him. "You seem to be in the know today. Where's Rika?"

"Sasaki and one of the other students are outside the room waiting for customers to seat."

"And you're all alone back here pouring water? Where is everybody?"

"Well, there are two girls doing the waiting right now, and there was someone else back here who left to grab the ice out of the fridge in the teacher's lounge."

"That's it? Did everyone else abandon ship, or something? How come there are so few people?"

Syaoran sets down the pitcher of water. "Relax, Sakura. Most people are just enjoying the festival right now while it's still early. Daidouji mentioned that she already had a few of our classmates go down and advertise the café. They'll start to show up as it gets more crazy down there. It's no reason to start panicking, okay?"

I sigh. "Yeah, I know."

"Then can you please stop shifting like that. You're starting to stress me out."

I freeze. "Sorry, but I don't know what to do."

"How about for now you just go and put the water out on the tables for me."

"Sure. Water. I can do that." After releasing a final puff of air, I grab a tray, fill it up with the glasses, and step out into the seating area of the classroom.

Just as Syaoran has said, two of our female classmates are waiting the tables, one shadowing the other.

As I set down the glasses, more people begin to appear. Rika waves to me as she leads them into the room. This general procedure continues for about an hour or so. I wait tables, Rika comes in to seat the people, and we both exchange looks and small gestures from across the room to signal our boredom. Every time I go into the back, which becomes increasingly crowded the later it gets, I try not to be obvious while starting at Syaoran.

By the time Tomoyo and Eriol finally come strolling into the back of the classroom, it's already half past noon, and the seating area is nearly full.

"Tomoyo! Thank goodness you're here! We're painstakingly understaffed."

Tomoyo, still on a high from her outing with her boyfriend, grins at me as if nothing in the world could bring her down. "No worries, Sakura. I'll go get changed now and then we can wait on tables together! By the way, you look adorable in that outfit!"

I ignore the fact that she used me as her model when designing the uniforms, and usher her into the changing area. "Thank you. Please hurry."

Just as she's about to close the curtain behind her, I grab it and lean into the tiny space. "And Tomoyo? Please don't leave me alone today. I have this knot in my stomach like there's something coming."

Tomoyo's eyes flash with a brief panic, then change to understanding. "Sure, Sakura. I promised Eriol we'd dance when they start the bonfire, but I'm completely yours until then. Sound good?"

"Yes. Thank you, Tomoyo."

She giggles, then waves her hand for me to go. "Now let me get changed before we're overrun with angry customers."

I laugh. Tomoyo always knows what to say to cheer me up.

Syaoran's POV

When I eventually find Sakura, she's with Daidouji. She's changed out of the cafe outfits Daidouji designed and is in her every-day uniform once more. As beautiful as I thought she looked in the dress, her figure illuminated by the bonfire in the simple outfit makes her even more magnificent.

Eriol appears from behind Daidouji, taking her hand and gesturing to the bonfire where pairs dance around the rising flames. Daidouji casts a glance at Sakura, who smiles and waves her hand for her friend to go ahead. Then she stands alone, watching the others from afar.

I approach her slow and silent, stopping far enough away not to alert her of my presence. Music hums around the courtyard making many of the others bob their heads or tap their feet. Sakura stands still, the only movement coming from the breeze that sends her hair fluttering against her face. Then she lifts her arm to brush it away, and turns. Her eyes meet mine immediately. Of all the things I expect her to do, she continues to surprise me. A faint smile pulls gently at the edges of her lips. In that instant, I can see calm and pure fondness in her eyes.

Before I can second guess myself, I hold out a hand to her. "Dance with me?"

The smile gradually falls from Sakura's face and is replaced with a troubled expression.

"It's just a dance," I assure her.

There's one final moment of hesitation before she reaches out and places her hand atop my own.

"You know I can't dance, right?"

"It will be fine. My mother taught me how to dance, after all."

"Really?"

"Yes. It was a mere ten plus years ago. Which coincidentally happens to also be when I last put the skill to use."

"Are you sure this is such a good idea? I'll probably end up stepping on your feet."

"Then I'll do my best to avoid yours."

And then we're dancing. I guide her to the others, take her other hand, and suddenly that's all there is. As we move together, I imagine we must look clumsy to others, but from where I'm standing, we're absolutely perfect.

Sakura's face is illuminated by the burning embers around us, giving her an iridescent glow. It contrasts the solemn light given off as the moonlight hit her face that day in the ocean. Back then she wasn't glowing at all, not the way she is right now. She's never seemed so alive to me.

"You're radiant." As I say the words, I realize how true they are.

Sakura's smile falters. She doesn't look sure how to respond. It's similar to her behavior when I first asked her to dance and leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. "Syaoran," she struggles for the words. "Please don't..."

"I'm not giving up, you know."

The claim jolts her. She freezes mid-step and gawks at me.

"On you," I clarify.

"But the other day-" she stutters.

"The other day I was trying to make sure you didn't mistake gratitude or impulse for love. I want to be with you, but only if it's for the right reasons."

This silences her, then she takes hold of my hand and pulls me out of the circle of people and towards the forgotten building. As we near the entrance, she turns to me and lifts her head, finally showing me her face. It's full of anguish.

"I need to talk to you privately. Wait a few minutes and then come to the art room. Please. It's important, Syaoran."

From her tone and expression, I don't have even the slightest thought to doubt her, so I nod. She wastes no time before making her way swiftly into the building, leaving me to stare after her and wonder what could be going on to cause such a reaction from her.

When I open the door to the art room several minutes later, Sakura is standing in front of one of several easels. Each one, with the exception of the one she's looking at, has a tarp over it. I'm almost tempted to ask if she's taking them all home, but decide better of it as she spots me and immediately swings her arms up. The white sheet in her hands flutters and then glides down around the last painting.

"Do you remember after the bonfire how I told you that there was something I needed to talk to you about when we got back? It might not be the ideal time, but I don't think I can go any longer without saying anything."

"I'm listening." As I cross the room, she lowers herself onto one of the stools and waits while I pull up another and sit down, giving her my full attention. "What is it you want to talk about?"

"Well... Distance to put it plainly."

I raise my eyebrows curiously. "Distance?"

"Yeah." Sakura intertwines her fingers. "To an extent. I've already mentioned it to you on New Year's Eve."

Memories from the first time I kissed her begin to bubble up, but I shove them back to focus on what she's saying. It was a long day, and we talked about a lot of things. What did we talk about that related to...

Distance.

And then I understand. And I wish briefly that I didn't.

"Why are you bringing this back up now?" My voice comes out more on-edge than I mean for it to. My entire body remains stalk still, my head down.

Sakura brings her hands closer to her body. "I think you might know why. Even if you don't want to admit it."

"Tell me."

"Syaoran..."

"Tell me!" I startle even myself, and quickly lift my head to Sakura. She blinks a few times at the abrupt change in my voice. "Sorry," I whisper. "Please, explain what you mean."

She takes a deep breath and then goes on. "Even if I'm able to return your feelings, Syaoran, we can't be together."

I have to allow myself a moment to calm down and think over her words. Of all the situations I played out in my head, this was not one.

Wait. Did she say-

"If?"

"What?"

"You said, 'Even if I'm able to return your feelings...' Did you not?"

"I-Yes, I said that. What difference does that-"

"So do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Love me!"

Sakura is abruptly silent for a moment, starting at me wide-eyed. Then she turns away, and says quietly and almost frustratedly, "What difference does it make?"

"It makes a huge difference, Sakura! If you don't love me, then none of this matters, but if you do, then-"

"Then what, Syaoran? You stay here in Japan to be with me, and ignore your entire future? Take me with you to Hong Kong so that I never get to see the father I just reunited with and the brother who raised me? Or were you thinking more along the lines of an indefinite relationship of us being on different land masses?"

"Is that really how you see it?"

"Yes! It is, and do you want to know why? Because I'm being practical."

"No, what you're being is a coward."

"If trying to protect the people I care about makes me a coward, then I could say the same to you. You never even asked me about why I kissed you. You just assumed that my judgment was clouded and that I didn't have the slightest clue what I was doing."

"Are you trying to tell me something right now?"

"I'm trying to tell you that if I didn't have feelings for you, do you really think I would've been so liberal with my actions? Do you think that had it been Yamazaki or Eriol, that I still would've-"

"No, of course not. That isn't what I meant. I meant that you were confused."

"Confused? I was no more confused then than I was that day in the park."

"That day in the park..." I stop. That day in the park that I almost kissed her. Before I told her I loved her. And she didn't push me away.

Silenced, I can do nothing but stare at her. Is she trying to say what it sounds like she is? I've never stopped before to look for any signs. I've thought before that maybe... But it was impossible. Her actions sometimes are misleading, but that's just the way she is, right? Whenever she leans a little too close, or stares a little too intently, those are things she does because I'm her friend, and we've been through a lot together. Isn't it? Sure. I mean, that's always what I've thought.

But is it? Is it really just because we're close friends? Was everything she's done been because we're friends, or was some of it because she sees me as something more? The more I think about it, the less sure I become.

My eyes stray from her and move across the room. White ghosts stand upon wooden feet everywhere my eyes go. It's unusual. She demanded I come up here and was in a rush, but she had me wait at the entrance so that she could come up first. Almost as an afterthought. Like there was a painting that she didn't want me to see.

"Paintings." My lips curve to form the word while my eyes shift across the different covered works throughout the room. "Have you ever painted me?"

"W-What?"

"Besides the one I've already seen, have you ever painted me?"

"I... No."

I look back at her. She's lying. Her eyes go from me, to the floor, then up to something across the room. When I follow her gaze, it just confirms my guess. I look at her again, and our eyes lock. There's a tension which breaks as soon as Sakura breaths out in defeat the word, "Yes."

"Why?"

Quietly–so quiet that I almost don't hear her–she explains, "I paint the things that cause me pain as well as the things that bring me happiness."

"Which category do I fall under?"

Her eyes dart between mine almost like she's unsure of the answer herself. "Both."

We sit like that for a while more, just studying the other. I can't allow myself to stay quiet, though. I've come to learn more about her feelings for me in the past ten minutes than I have in the entire two weeks since I confessed to her.

"Sakura, I told you before that I wouldn't pressure you on this topic, but something tells me you already know the answer, so please answer me honestly. Can you promise me that?"

From her expression, it seems she's already guessed what I'm about to ask. She nods slowly.

Taking a deep breath, and bracing myself for whatever reply I'm left with, I allow the words to pass my lips for a second and final time. "Do you love me?"

There's no hesitation. No second guessing. All there is is the gentle softness of her breathing out the word, "Yes."

It makes my heart pound in a way that only she can do.

It doesn't feel real. After years of being near her... After learning about what I missed in the past... But this is the present. And now she's sitting just a few feet away telling me that yes, she does love me. Yet it doesn't feel right. It's so simple and so abrupt...

"Are you sure?"

She seems baffled by the question at first, then her eyes abruptly narrow and her fists clench. Rising to her feet and glaring down at me, she angrily bites out, "Of course I'm sure. I know what my feelings are, Syaoran. How can you even ask me that?"

"Why are you so angry?" I defend.

She twists back in my direction. "Because I'm finally able to tell you that I love you, and you're asking me if I'm sure! I've been sure for months!"

Months? I ask myself. Calmer now, I dare to ask, "Why did you never say anything?"

This actually makes her hesitate. She shifts her weight, and crosses her arms protectively across her body. "I was already in love with you once before, remember? That time I didn't even have to tell you how I felt for you to break my heart. I hadn't intended to tell you this time around, either."

My mouth snaps shut. I slump dejectedly forward on the stool, and stare down at the tile below our feet. "Sakura..." I try desperately to think of something to say to make her understand that will help me to understand as well. "I told you, though. After I told you how I felt, why wouldn't you?" I lift my face, begging her for an explanation. "Were you just going to let me think that you could never love me again after what I did to you when we were children?"

"No! That was never my intention, Syaoran. I didn't want to tell you, because-" She stops short.

"Why?"

"Forget it." She shakes her head, and walks towards the window. It's something she's done to me too many times before. She starts to say something, but then stops like she thinks I can't handle it or that I'll be mad at her for thinking it.

"Tell me, Sakura."

Finally, she looks back at me, locks eyes, and snaps. "I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid if I did, everything would change!"

Her explanation baffles me. "Isn't that a good thing? If I love you, and you love me, then isn't change a good thing?"

"No! How could it be when everything is going to end soon? You keep on forgetting, Syaoran! No matter what, we can't be together!"

"Why? After all this time, can't you at least give me–us–a chance?" I rise to my feet and step up to her, being as gentle and loving as I can as I rest my hand on her clenched fist. "I won't lose you a second time. You can be sure of that. I'll never hurt you again."

She jerks away from me. "You won't have a choice! Think about it for a minute! How do you see this playing out? We start dating for a few month, getting even closer than we already are so that when you leave–and you will leave–it'll be that much more painful? I don't want that! I don't want to watch you leave any more than you want to go."

"Are you telling me that you won't even give me a chance? Just because eventually we'd have to have a long distance relationship?"

"Try to really think about it. Long distance relationships aren't easy as it is, but what makes it that much harder is that you still have to go to college after we graduate. And then you're going to be doing whatever it is you'll do in your family business. You won't have time to fuss over some girl who's over a thousand miles away."

A spike of irritation has me frowning down at her. "You've really thought this through, haven't you? Without even saying a word to me, you decided we have no future; is that it?"

"Don't say it like that! I'm not trying to be the bad guy here! I'm trying to protect both of us."

"You don't need to. It's not like I'm asking you to marry me. What I want is for you to take a chance. Is that really so hard for you to understand?"

"I understand, Syaoran, but I can't. I'm sorry, but I just can't." She backs even farther away from me and turns so that I can't see her face.

A miserable part of me knows what it means, but I'm too distracted to listen at first. We're so close to each other now. I could reach out and nearly reach her. So close. She continues to elude me, though. Even now. Even when she loves me the same way that I love her, I still can't have her by my side.

She's wrong about everything. I want to tell her so. She doesn't care, though. She won't listen, no matter how much I pour my heart out to her. What hurts the most is that even though she says it's distance separating us, I can't help but feel there's something more.

"So that's it... There's nothing I can say to change your mind?"

Her auburn locks fall around her face when she looks down. She's given me her answer. My mother was right. While I might not like Sakura's decision, I have to respect it. After all, she's the person I've chosen to love.

"I'll leave you alone, then." As I'm turning to go, I stop. After this, we'll have to go back to just being friends, but before that happens, there's one last thing I need to do.

I reach out and rest my hands on her shoulders, then gently press my lips to her forehead. "I love you, Sakura. Please, don't ever forget that."

I can't bring myself to look at her as I leave the room. Outside, people continue to cheer and celebrate all around. Frustration devours me. The aching in my chest is something else, though.

The walk back to my apartment I spend trying to ignore the way my body is acting in defiance to everything I do.

When I open the door and enter my small home, Meiling is already there to greet me. "Syaoran!" She lunges for me and wraps her arms around my own. "How was the festival? Did you have fun?"

I shrug her off. "Not now, Meiling. I don't feel well. I'm just going to go straight to bed. Tell Wei I got in alright."

The first thing I do when I reach my room is fall back onto the mattress. I've never felt so overwhelmingly tired. Nor have I ever wished for something more than I do right now wishing I could think of anything but the one girl who continues to monopolize my thoughts.

That's it. Don't hurt me, please. I know it's short. And you're probably pissed about what happened. I'm actually kicking myself as well right now. I'd like to have been able to handle it differently. That's what editing is for, though. This is just the rough draft. In fact, the entire story is a rough draft, really. I mean, it's the first time I'm writing it. Only get better by rewriting and learning what can be done to make it better. So if you're reading the chapter, I'm gonna need feedback if you've got the time and the ideas. Next chapter is going to focus on Sakura, by the way. In case you were wondering.

Oh, and you guys. Maybe nobody cares, but SPOILERS: After Djokavic won the Wimbledon final for this year (2015), he met Benedict! As in Benedict Cumberbatch who's Sherlock in BBC's Sherlock, as well as Smaug in the Hobbit movies, and Khan in Star Trek! Plus other things, I'm sure, but I haven't seen those... Or at least don't remember seeing them. Not the point. I think my brain exploded when it happened. So great. Oh, and before that, right after he won, Djokavic ate some of the grass. Oh my gosh, it was the funniest thing. They even asked him about it. So great. Up top to all my tennis fans out there. Unless you were rooting for Federer, in which case, sorry. But he did win like 7 times already. I counted. On the wall.

Okay, enough tennis stuff. I've gotta go. And work on the next chapter. I think the way I've ended this just made it like ten times harder to start the next... Well, with the way I had wanted to. Ugh. But I can't hold off on updating. Oh well. When I do the edit, this is all going to come out way better, you guys, I promise.

I'll see you in a few weeks. Hopefully two. Or less. Let's shoot for that.