Thank You so much for the Reviews, Favourites and Follows. I'm glad this story is being enjoyed, because I am having so much fun writing it!
In the original draft of the first twelve chapters, and the plan for this story this Chapter didn't exist. I had no intention of writing a Christmas chapter, there are far too many amazing ones out there for me to compete. And this one in no way tries to compete, but I made a compromise with myself, I knew this had to be a filler Chapter, so I turned it into a semi Christmas filler to sweeten the deal.
It's not my favourite, I hate fillers so I'm just going to leave it here and I hope you Read, Enjoy and PLEASE REVIEW...
Fairytale Of New York
Derek slipped into the room Meredith had once shared with his two younger sisters, and to give them some semblance of privacy closed the door behind him. The ear-splitting snores coming from the tiny female sprawled in the centre of the bed, made it crystal clear the boisterous activates of the morning so far had completely passed her by.
Unlike both of his sisters who insisted sharing a room with Meredith was the singular reason they were now able to sleep through absolutely anything, Derek a notoriously light sleeper had resorted to wax ear plugs during their time together. Meredith had produced them the first time with a laugh, and a quip about how snoring like a trucker was the one trait she, and Thatcher had in common. Not once, had she believed him when he had swore her snores were almost reassuring in their ferocity. Out of embarrassment Derek had never explained how their very first night together in her tiny apartment, he had spent the whole night wide awake listening to her snore. Even though she had been curled naked in his arms, it was the fact that she was there snoring that had made it feel real, rather than just another dream he would wake from.
Now, listening with amused affection to a noise he had thought he would never hear again Derek found he was smiling. Not just because Meredith had come home, but because if they could work this out then one day it wouldn't be just snatched moments, instead it would be a lifetime. He would have a lifetime, and all the misery of the past few years would be left behind, never again would he have to endure the loneliness that had been his life without her. Work was what he had used to try, and fill the giant hole in his life left by her absence. The only moments of peace he had found had been in the O.R. However, those intoxicating peaks were near impossible to sustain when the one person you wanted to share them with had gone. It had meant he was constantly searching for the next high risk, or lost cause case. Professionally he had flourished, moving ahead of any of his competitors, where as his personal life outside the hospital had become non existent. He was well aware everyone had presumed his unpredictable moods, and workaholic tendencies were down to a combination of both the divorce, and his fallout with Meredith, and Derek hadn't corrected them. He couldn't, not when he had made a promise to Meredith never to reveal the affair to anyone, even Mark. The truth was very simple, any hurt, or disappointment he might have felt once about the failure of his marriage, was eclipsed easily by the devastation of his relationship with Meredith ending.
Unlike the numerous regrets he had where Meredith was concerned, his single regret with Rebecca was having dragged it out for so long. It wasn't even as if they had kept their marital problem's private. That was near impossible to do when you couldn't be in the same room together without a row kicking off. By the time he had first drunkly kissed Meredith, he couldn't remember the last time they were happy, or living as anything more than strangers. Meredith may think she was a home-wrecker, but what Derek wished she could truly understand was there was no home to wreck.
When she had left him, and he was forced to finally face up to the mess he had made, he had ended his marriage over the first dinner he had shared with his wife in months. There had been no dramatics, or pleas to try again, just acceptance from them both, that they were done pretending. The relief Rebecca had obviously felt had been clear to see, but for him any feeling of freedom, or weight lifted from his shoulders had been clouded by the realisation it was too little, too late. Whilst Meredith had left his life in a storm of emotions, Rebecca did so with barely a whimper. They had both known they wouldn't be the type of divorcees who stayed friends. There was no residual feelings, or jealousy to prevent them, it was just as Rebecca had so simply, and bluntly put, neither of them cared enough to try.
As another snore rumbled from the bed, Derek threw off the heaviness of the past knowing if he didn't do the job he had been sent up to now, a more noisy and abrupt wake up would be in Meredith's very near future. Regretfully he placed the glass of water, and two pills down on to the bedside table then moved across to the window, and dragged back the heavy curtains.
"Good morning sunshine!"
With a groan Meredith buried her face in the pillow, burrowing away from both the light now streaming into the room, and in her opinion Derek's overly cheerful voice.
"Sadly still no snow, so no white Christmas for you! Even so, it is a beautiful winters day! Clear and crisp!"
As he spoke Derek crossed over to the bed, and began to tug on the blankets, she was clinging so tightly too. He had to force himself to concentrate on the fact he was here to wake Meredith, rather than to ogle the half dressed body he was revealing.
"I slept great on the couch by the way, being woken up at four am after two hours sleep was just fantastic! So as the women who slept in a comfortable bed for over five hours, I hope you are filled to the brim with Christmas spirit!"
Though, he had had no protection from being awoken by a mass of small bodies piling on top of him, both his parents had insisted the usual Shepherd tradition of one up meant all up was in Meredith's case, suspended this year. In the face of protests from children, and adults alike Carolyn had let slip how Meredith had barely slept since she had been back, and was obviously exhausted. Derek still fighting the pull of sleep himself had listened with guilt settling low in his stomach, well aware he was the most likely cause for her insomnia. It was why when the mounds of presents had been demolished, and the clock had shown a more reasonable hour of seven-thirty,Derek had held the younger of his nieces and nephews off in the hallway, and had come to do it himself.
"Why are you torturing me?" Meredith's grumble was muffled by the pillow, and smiling in amusement Derek sat down on the edge of the bed.
"How is wishing the women I love a good morning torturous?"
"Your talking, and your doing it all cheerfully, with that stupid grin on your face. I don't even have to look at you to know its there, and it's annoying."
What had started out as a chuckle turned into a full blown laugh by the time she had finished, and reaching over Derek stroked a hand over her hair.
"Ah ha, hungover Meredith Grey… And, I had thought it was drunken Meredith I had missed the most, clearly I had forgotten the morning after. Now, if you raise your head, and look to your left there is a glass of water, and some painkillers that might help."
"I cant... If I move, I may die." Meredith moaned leaning into his touch as his cool hand grazed her cheek.
"A little dramatic for Christmas morning don't you think? Especially, when you are in a house full to the brim with doctors."
"And children. Fourteen loud, over excited, genetically chatty-chatty Shepherd offspring."
"So me stopping them from coming upstairs to wake you, was the right thing to do then?"
"You did that?"
Meredith asked peeking an eye open to find blue eyes watching her with warm affection.
"I did."
"Thank you,"
"Your welcome. Now any other time, I might say the best way to say thank you would be sex... However, I will behave in the spirit of Christmas, and all..."
With a giggle, and an uncoordinated shove in his general direction Meredith pushed herself up into a sitting position. Smiling in gratitude when with a wink Derek presented her with the glass of water, and two pills. Meredith was too preoccupied with making sure her stomach didn't revolt when she chased the tablets down with the water to protest when Derek shifted them both so they were now sharing her bed. She was now sat with her back against his chest, his jean clad legs framing her as he loosely wrapped an arm around her waist. With a sigh of half relief, half pleasure at the closeness Meredith allowed her head to drop back, and rest against him.
It seemed so much longer ago than three days when she had had to fight her own body to not give in to the temptation of resting her head against his shoulder on the font porch. Three days, in which she had gone from being certain she would be leaving New York, and returning to the same life with Josh in Seattle, to knowing for both their sakes she had to end the relationship. Her whole life had changed in three days, and all because no matter how hard she tried, or how far she ran there was no getting over the man who had his chin resting on her shoulder. The man she had loved for over half of her life, and just like that their early morning talk in his car came rushing back with blinding clarity.
Meredith opened, then closed her mouth countless times before she managed to get any words out, or make sense of the thoughts crashing around her already aching head. Derek who had felt her sudden tension hid his smile in the material
of her oversized Dartmouth t shirt, as he guessed what was happening.
"Your memory is surfacing through the haze of Tequila then?"
"You… you said stuff. Big stuff… Life changing kind of things..."
"I did."
"Did you mean it?"
"Yes."
His voice was little more than a whisper, his hands finding hers to twine their fingers together resting at her waist.
"I meant every word."
"Oh..."
Meredith breathed, and tried to sort through the muddle in her head just enough to give some sort of answer. Derek in Seattle. Derek in Seattle for her, was something she hadn't allowed herself to even fantasise about once during her whole time away. Yet, now he was here giving her that wish as if it was the easiest thing in the world, and it was scary. It was terrifying when she even considered just for a moment all he was willing to give up for her, and there was a sudden desire to bolt. Bolt from the bed, the room and the actual house, and not stop until she could escape this ball of panic in her chest. As if he had sensed her thoughts she felt his arms tighten around her waist, and Meredith forced herself to relax, to think rationally. If she rejected him now, if she told him not to come it would be the end, and she knew she would regret it every day for the rest of her life.
"Okay then."
"Okay? Really, because last night you had a lot more to say. Is this just the hangover talking?"
"No… I think it's okay. I mean you asked for a chance right?"
"I did."
"Then okay… Okay, is all I have right now Derek. I'm saying okay, to a chance..."
Meredith shrugged helplessly as she let her body fall back against him again. She turned her head so she could press her face into his neck, inhale the scent she knew so well, and remember this was Derek.
"I just want to take it slow, I need time…"
"Well, you know I can take it slow, very slow in fact…" Derek teased wanting to lighten the atmosphere, his hands moving to her sides to tickle her just beneath her ribs.
"So not what I meant!" Meredith managed to choke out through the laughter before she caught hold of his wrists. "Stop or I'll be sick."
"Well we don't want that. Vomit is not a good way to start a day… This, now this is how I don't mind starting my day. So lets have this, for a bit longer." Derek empathised his words with a gentle squeeze, pulling her back against his chest.
Meredith allowed the following comfortable silence to last for a few minutes before she reluctantly broke it.
"Have you told anyone yet?"
"Apart from Webber, and my own Chief of Surgery no… I was going to wait till you left tomorrow. I can't leave it any longer, or I risk Mark hearing about it from one of his nurses during pillow talk, and he'll love nothing more than dropping me in it with everyone. I want to tell Mom and Dad myself,"
"Don't tell them about this Derek..." Meredith waved her hand between them "Tell them about the job, but not this, not yet. We need time without any pressure, and our family as much as I love them would be on us like a pack of wolves!"
"Wolves? That's certainly fitting for a few of my sisters,"
"I'm serious,"
"Okay… I'll just tell them that I'm trying to put things right between us, and that Richard is throwing everything my way to tempt me out there... I want us to be open Mer, but only when your ready…"
"Thank you."
"And Josh?"
"I just hate that I am going to hurt him… He asked me if this was us ending before he left, and I said no… I lied to him, I have treated him awfully this whole trip… See it's the Grey thing again,"
"Mer stop. You haven't done anything wrong, we haven't crossed that line, you have nothing to be ashamed off."
"Emotionally we crossed it the moment I joined you at the dock…I have been crossing it ever since I started seeing him. I just wanted to be over you, I didn't want to hurt any more, and I used him..."
"I'm sorry I did that… If I could go back, I would..."
"I know."
"I'll make it up to you Mer."
Derek promised, and it was only then as he concentrated on the sound of her breathing that the noise outside her door penetrated the bubble they had found themselves in.
"I think we are about to be invaded by some of the chatty chatty Shepherd offspring you were moaning about earlier… It looks like I took too long."
"Hold them off, I have to shower."
Ungracefully Meredith rolled from the bed, and managed to stumble into the bathroom, the door closing behind her, just as the bedroom door flew open. Derek wasn't surprised to see Lizzie's eldest daughter Morgan at the head of the pack, followed by three more of his nieces.
"Where's Auntie Mer? Daddy says if he has to be up then so does she. Daddy has a hang over Uncle Derek, and Mummy says it serves him right because he's an idiot!"
Said so matter of factly she sounded much older than her six years, and trying his best not to laugh Derek ruffled her dark curls.
"Daddy might be an idiot, but it's not very nice call him it."
"I didn't. Mummy did."
"Oh well maybe we need to get Grandma to talk to Mummy about her manners then. Auntie Meredith is in the shower, so how about I tell you what really works wonders for a hungover, and will make him feel so much better?"
"What?" Though it was Morgan that spoke, there were three other pairs of wide eyes watching him with curiosity.
"Some Christmas carols. But, it only works if you sing them really loudly."
"Daddy told me he needed a quiet day today because his head hurts… I don't want a cross Daddy, otherwise Santa will come back, and take his presents."
"I'm a brain surgeon, and your Uncle, would I lie? Plus me and Santa, we're like this."
Derek held up his crossed fingers, and watched with satisfaction as at a run they were off, their voices already rising in volume as Morgan led the way into an out of tune rendition of Little Donkey. Derek began to follow, his satisfaction growing with the sound of a grateful "Thank you" coming from the en suite.
When Meredith stepped down into the hallway thirty minutes later, she felt her breath catch in her throat. She didn't know if it was because she hadn't been home in so long, or because there had been so much going on that the actual reality of it being Christmas Day had been pushed right to the back of her mind. Whatever it was, all she knew was suddenly she felt like that six year old, experiencing it all for the first time again. It didn't seem to matter that all the decorations had been up before she had arrived, that she had knelt with Carolyn yesterday to stack the gifts under the tree, or that the one gift she was most nervous about was in her hand. In this moment the whole picture seemed as magical as it had to her then, and there was no stopping the sudden warmth the bloomed in her chest, or the smile spreading across her face.
Christmas Day in the Shepherd house was always a more laid back affair than the traditional Thanksgiving Meredith had missed a month ago. Today was based solely around the enjoyment of the children, it had been the same when they were younger, and now it centred around the next generation. Other relations and close friends were often invited to pop in for some food, and drink throughout the day, but ultimately it was all about quality time together as a family.
"You okay?"
Derek who had been just about to turn to go back into the dining room from the kitchen spotted Meredith at a complete standstill in the archway to the living room, a small package clasped in her hand.
"It's Christmas Day Derek, and I'm home... So yeah I am good."
"Yes you are."
Derek changed directions, his own smile matching hers by the time he was stood beside her.
"Merry Christmas Derek,"
Meredith reached up to press a kiss to his cheek, and then pushed the present she had been holding into his hands. Confused by the gesture Derek held it away from him as if ready to give it back.
"What's this?"
"Your present."
Meredith pushed the present back towards him as she spoke, wishing she had remembered last night to slip it under the tree. All the other presents had been shipped ahead the week previously, but she had never been able to find exactly what she had wanted for Derek until a day before she had flown out.
"Mer…? I didn't..."
Derek stared down at the gift, and felt like a complete ass for not breaking tradition, and getting her something. Long ago when the family had been expanding faster and faster every year, the siblings had decided rather than buy for each other they would concentrate on their parents, and their nieces and nephews.
"No no its okay. It's little, and I saw it in the hospital gift shop in Seattle. This year well I didn't expect it to turn out like it has, but maybe this is more fitting now … You don't have to say anything, and I never expected anything in return, I brought for everyone, and I wanted you to have this..."
Her ramble came to a stop and Derek nodded half smiling.
"Thank you."
"You have to open it, and then say thank you,"
"Right sorry..."
Derek pulled the paper apart, and stared down as he turned the scrub cap around in his hand. He wasn't sure his grin could stretch any wider as he tore his eyes from the cap to stare in wonder at Meredith.
"A ferry boat scrub cap? You got me a ferry boat scrub cap?"
"Well Seattle has Ferry Boat's too you know..."
"I didn't… Now I know I'm going to love it there. Meredith, I love it. Thank you."
"I'm glad."
The way he was staring at here was the exact look she remembered slapping at him for doing the night before. It was a darkening of his eyes, a softness to his smile that suddenly made it impossible for her to think rationally.
"Come here."
"We can't..." Meredith took a quick step back, knowing she wouldn't be able to stop herself from reciprocating in whatever he was planning to start.
Derek ignored her protest to wrap to pull into a tight hug, his breath tickled her ear as he spoke.
"I am very capable of PG rated shows of affection you know!"
When he stepped away Meredith missed the closeness, the only thing that stopped her from pulling him back was the very thin line she knew they were walking.
"I need coffee."
"And I have to put this away, then get back in there, I am on spill duty!."
Meredith was barely through the kitchen door when a large mug of coffee was pushed into her hands.
"You look like you need this sweetheart. I had told them to let you sleep,"
"I'm okay Mom, and Merry Christmas." Meredith kissed the cheek offered to her, but Carolyn stopped her before she could move away.
"Merry Christmas my love." Carolyn said with a smile noticing the change in her daughter from the previous morning. It was as if someone had relit the spark in her, and despite all the obvious signs of a hangover, it was more like the old Meredith than they had seen this whole trip.
"Go sit at the table with that, unless I can convince you to go have something to eat in the dining room, with your Father and the other men."
"This is good Mom," Meredith reassured before moving on to exchange Christmas greetings with the three sisters, and an extremely hungover Rob
"Where did you leave Amelia last night?" Kate asked sliding in beside her at the table.
"She stayed at Mark's,"
"Clever girl." Rob muttered "I don't know why I let him talk me into any of it,"
"Because your a fool. I mean you know Mark, you must have known what he had planned?" Nancy asked leaning against the counter.
"I'm not even sure how you managed to drink it. Me, and Amy were put off by the smell, I think you were the only one that actually drank any."
"Because like Nancy said he's a fool. What time did you get in Mer?" Liz asked from across the table.
"Twoish I think."
"So Der brought you home? The kids found him on the couch this morning..."
"Yeah, he turned up once the party was done."
"So you two are better?" Nancy asked and trying to show any sign that Nancy could possible catch onto Meredith shrugged.
"We're fine."
At the raised eyebrows Meredith realised her mistake immediately, and sighed before addressing the whole room.
"No I mean actually fine! Not Meredith fine, but fine fine…." Remembering Derek's words from earlier Meredith latched on to them "We're working on it, okay?"
"I'm glad. Der missed you." Lizzie said simply but Meredith knew by the set of Nancy's mouth she wasn't finished.
"So does that mean we get to finally hear what really happened?"
"It doesn't matter now," Liz answered for her "It's obviously blown over."
"If it doesn't matter then why can't we hear about it… Honestly Mer I'm curious?"
"Nancy leave it alone," Carolyn intervened "Mer I really think you should eat something?"
"I'm fine honest Mom,"
"Ah ha, there is my favourite girl. Merry Christmas."
Meredith smiled as she felt a kiss pressed into the top of her head.
"Merry Christmas Dad."
"Michael will you get her to eat please. I know she's hungover, but she never remembers that she always feels better after some toast."
Meredith knew Carolyn had a point, however she knew it wouldn't just be toast set out on the dining room table. There would be every type of breakfast food imaginable, and lots of children eating said foods.
"Better do as she says … Come on, I'll look after you."
Michael wrapped an arm around her shoulder, and led her through into the dining room. Meredith immediately found herself the centre of attention from fourteen children, ranging from Kathleen's oldest son Jeremy at fifteen, down to Liz's nearly three year old twins Jamie and Ryan. However, Michael stuck to his word, and she was soon seated between Derek and Kate's husband Jack. It was Derek who pushed a plate of thinly buttered toast in front of her.
"Looking a little green Mer… How's the head?"
Jack laughed as she glanced around at the food, wincing as the twins ran screaming through to the den chased by their sister.
"Bet you are wishing you were wherever Amelia and Mark are right now,"
"No… I'm good. Just keep your eggs out of my line of vision."
"What time did you get in last night?"
"Twoish … I found her and Amy the only survivors of the party sharing a bottle of Tequila in Mark's office. The place was a mess..."
"How much of a mess? The voice came from the doorway, and Derek turned to see Mark still dressed in last nights clothes.
"You haven't been home yet?"
"I haven't been to bed yet. Well, not to sleep anyway."
Mark laughed as Derek covered the ears of Jenny Nancy's five year old daughter who was sat next to him.
"Coincidently I was prepared for that outcome, and stocked the car with a change of clothes and the presents. So how's Robert?"
"If I was you I would stay out of sight of Liz."
"How bad are we talking? Are we at the 'I told Carter about the crush' end of the scale or..."
"Bridesmaid in the Church end..." Meredith answered, alluding to when Lizzie missing a bridesmaid for the wedding party photos had found her old college room-mate with Mark semi naked in the Churches ladies toilets.
"Well in that case Uncle Mark is going up for a shower, and if you brats go grab your cousins, out in the hall there is some seriously good gifts waiting for you. So good, I will reign as favourite Uncle for another year..."
"Delusional as well as sleep deprived, everyone knows I'm the favourite Uncle and the favourite brother."
"I'm not the delusional one…"
"Hey Liz there you are..." Meredith teased cutting in to the familiar build up between Derek and Mark. She nearly choked on her toast when a visibly paler Mark swung around with his hands held up in defence.
"Well that wins the favourite in-law contest right there." Paul, Nancy's husband announced from the other side of the table.
"Kid, how can you betray me like that…Where's the love? You're meant to be on my side."
"You guilt tripped me into coming last night, and then left me and Amy to play hostess to your guests, there is no love this morning..."
"Hey come on I have been chasing Hannah for three years,"
"Helen, her name was Helen."
"You sure?"
Meredith simply stared her eyebrow raising, and Mark smirked.
"When you do that, I have flashbacks to Ellis every-time I left my bike in your drive…"
The piece of toast hit him square in the face, and jumping from his seat Derek steered him out in to the hall.
"Thin ice. She's hungover…You have one woman pissed at you, do you really want another? If she gangs up with Liz, then your life will be over."
"If she's pissed at me, you get to fly under her radar."
"Mer and me, we've talked. We're working on it."
"That's great Shep."
"Yeah it is."
"I'm glad. Now persuade her to come home… "
"That won't happen,"
"Oh shit cover me for me." Mark hissed shoving Derek towards the kitchen as the door began to open, and Derek heard him disappearing up the stairs as he came face to face with his sister.
"Where is he?"
"I have no idea what your talking about." Derek said loudly as his hand moved to point to the direction Mark had headed. It was only moments later before there was a shout from Mark and laughing Derek headed back into the dining room only to find Meredith had disappeared.
That was how it continued for the rest of the day. It seemed to Derek that the powers that be, or rather his family had decided he had had his allowance of alone time with Meredith for the day. From her breakfast she had been dragged off to admire all the new toys, and the kids had held her attention till dinner when she had been seated at the opposite end of the table to him. Though he wanted her to have this time, that she needed it, he also knew once she flew out tomorrow evening it would be days before he saw her again, and selfishly he wanted as much time with her as possible.
Once she was in Seattle, her life where he had no part yet, she could change her mind, or decide Josh was the safer bet after all. He knew he was being paranoid, it just felt as if the past few days were a dream and he was due a sharp awakening. So he leaned in the doorway to the den and watched with a smile as Jenny, and Morgan practised their braiding skills on her hair. Amelia who had appeared at lunchtime fresher than any of them who had been at the party, was sat on the floor in front of the couch having the same treatment by Chloe and Libby.
"Your going to Seattle aren't you?" Liz's voice was a whisper, and stunned Derek turned to look at the sister closest in age to him. He hadn't even heard her approach let alone stood right next to him.
"How do you even know that? I thought Nancy was the witch in this family?"
"Rob may well be an idiot but I am not. I've been watching you today, and the way you look at Mer… It's like Dad looking at Mom. I have never seen you look at someone like that before, or if you have I wasn't paying attention, or rather you didn't want us to see it."
There was heavy significance placed on Lizzie's words that Derek chose to ignore.
"Hmm… You know Rob isn't an idiot, he chose my favourite sister after all."
"And Mer has been in love with my favourite brother since we were fifteen years old."
"Come on..."
"Der I have been one of her best friends since we were six, and like I said not an idiot! She was crazy about you, in a very Meredith way, which meant hiding it under a banner of complete avoidance, but it was always there. Whatever is going on I'm glad you finally caught up. Just make sure you tell Mom and Dad first!"
"I was planning too. You don't seem too cut up at the thought of me leaving,"
"I'm glad your going. It means I get a shot at being the favourite for once."
"No chance..."
"I'm guessing that knowing Mer, no one is meant to know anything?"
"No."
"I can keep a secret. Just Der, whatever happened before don't hurt her like that again…"
"I won't,"
"You wont what?" Kate asked coming up behind them, the cordless house phone held out in her hand.
"What are you doing with that?" Liz countered, and Kate nodded to where Meredith was.
"It's Josh. Mer must have left her cell somewhere,"
Derek watched as his sister took the phone to Meredith, and then Meredith promptly excuse herself much to the disappointment of his nieces. Wanting more than anything to follow, Derek held back, and took the spot Meredith had left on the couch. Meredith still hadn't appeared over an hour later when the rest of the adults had gathered in front of the TV, and worried now Derek started to check her preferred hiding places. He finally found her out in the back yard swinging back and forth on the old garden swing set.
"Hey?"
"Hey..."
"It's cold out here..."
"I think crisp is what you called it this morning…"
Meredith leaned back on the swing to stare up at the night sky.
"I couldn't tell him… I thought I would, but then he was talking, and I couldn't."
"It's okay. I'm not going to push you into anything. If your not ready, your not ready…"
"Do you know you are the only person I've ever broken up with before…"
"Are you asking me for feedback?"
Her unexpected giggle was like music to his ears, and sitting down on the other swing Derek pushed off with his legs to keep pace with her.
"No!"
"Good. That would be an awkward conversation, even for us…"
"It would be… I know it's my ego talking, but I don't want him to hate me, I'd like to be his friend,"
"Yeah, don't say that,"
"So no offering to be friends, right. Anything else?"
"Meredith no… Just be honest. Trust me you are not easy to hate."
"Nor are you. Mark will hate me when you tell him."
"No he wont… He'll probably end up following us. Second thoughts?"
"About Mark? Well I really like the nurses at Seattle Grace, and they like me too… That won't last long if I'm responsible for bringing Mark into their lives."
"Meredith,"
Laughing now Derek came off his swing to stand in front of her, cupping her face in his hands.
"Answer me."
Meredith let go of one of one of the chains to hold his waist, widening her legs for him to move closer so she could lay her head against his stomach.
"I may not want to hurt Josh, but no second thoughts. I came home because I was done running from you, and they do say; if you can't beat them, then join them..."
Wrapping his arms around her Derek bent to kiss the top of her head.
"Not the most complimentary comparison, but as I love you I'll let that go. It'll be okay Mer, you'll see. Everything will work out, I can feel it."
PLEASE REVIEW...