Alice Undercover
By Rurple101
Chapter 10: More Memories of Past-Muchness
Alice was sure that if her plan failed, then she might just crack in a hundred pieces. The words that had come out of her best friend's mouth had been so touching and yet so sad that she had struggled not to cry and hug him.
But in her cover as Jesse, she knew all too well that she couldn't do that yet. Hatter still needed a few more memories to hit home before she was safe to reveal her secret.
A light in the darkness of his madness.
What a clearly pure and happy way to be seen as.
But she felt undeserving of his love and affections. She had done this to him and she had to restore him back, and only if he wanted her, would she feel satisfied with her work.
The day after their 'training session' she had caught him looking at her at odd intervals. It was normally at the breakfast table or when she pirouetting around the place, normally laden with books.
She had accidentally spun right into Tarrant as he emerged from his chambers one morning and he spilled his glass of water all down her front.
"Sorry Tarrant!" she gasped as the cold water bounced off her dress and dribbled to the floor.
Why did she have to wear a shirt dress today of all days?
She felt her cheeks redden and she scooped up her books quickly, stacking them in her arms so they shield her modesty.
He looked just as alarmed as she had.
"Sorry!" he too apologised. "I wasn't watching where I was walking…or do I mean where I was going…it's really hard to see when I am thinking about things you see so-."
"Hatter!" she said without thinking.
"Fez" he said, clearly in auto pilot.
But then he froze on the spot, only just realising what he had said. His eyes glazed over and became glassy and round. His mouth moved but no words came out.
I really hope I haven't blown my cover, Jesse thought as she watched the shock play on his face, his eyes widening and touching his mouth with his fingers.
There were another few seconds of stunned silence before he saw a puddle at his feet and the empty water glass in his other hand.
"I drenched you did I?" he said, with an awkward but amused expression in place. "Do you want me to grab a towel to dry your dress?"
"Thank you for the kind offer Tarrant but I ought to rush. I need to meet with our Queen this morning. Sorry for walking into you!" she said hurriedly and then pecked his cheek before dashing off, clutching her books tightly in her sweaty hands.
Tarrant wondered absently if he was getting tired of seeing Jesse Wayton or not.
She was a peculiar character and yet every time it seemed, that he saw or spoke to or about her, he seemed to be awash with thoughts and feelings that felt familiar and yet seemed strange to him.
It was almost like a long-lost friend or family member had come and visited him for the weekend only for him to forget absolutely everything about them.
Having been tempted to ask her the questions, he soon realised that it was probably not a good plan due to the fact that she was a complete stranger to him and why should she be able to answer his questions?
And yet…yet she was familiar…
He couldn't shake off the feeling that he had met her before, in what felt another lifetime.
When Alice had met with Mirana she had also been able to meet with her other close Underlandian friends which of course were all the Hatter's friends…only he had forgotten.
"Oh Alice!" Mally squealed as she scurried up the cool corridor towards their champion. "I love what you've done to your hair! It…I think it actually suits you!"
Alice had smiled despite herself. Being a fan of her purple red hair herself, she subconsciously ran a hand through her soft curls which she'd let down since she'd left the Red Queen's castle.
She knelt down in front of the dormouse as Bayard and McTwisp appeared around the corner as well.
"Thank you Mally" Alice said graciously as she scratched the back of Bayard's ears and McTwisp shook her hand eagerly. "It's so good to see you guys again!"
"We missed you Lady Alice" McTwisp stuttered, always anxious. He peered at his pocket watch nervously as he spoke.
"Well I wish it was in happier circumstances" Alice sighed, feeling somewhat miserable again. "It's all my fault for this anyway."
"Alice!" Mally scolded her, sounding outraged. She even drew her hairpin and waved it threateningly at Alice's closest hand. "If I hear anymore self-pity I'll stick ya!"
Knowing that Mally was only trying to make her feel better Alice smiled.
"You guys will be crucial to my plan if all goes well on my part" she confided in them confidentially. "It is absolutely critical then that I am not exposed before the right moment. Hatter isn't in the right state yet. I don't think it's too long now, but nobody is to even mention me, in case the Red Queen searches for me and ends up imprisoning my friends like last time!"
She sounded so serious that all three of them stared at her, all speechless for a few seconds.
"Blimey Alice" Mally said after a few seconds. She sounded amazed.
"I don't want to cause anyone anymore pain" Alice said with feeling. "Hatter is this way because I was too stupid and naïve to realise that my world meant nothing more to me that you guys."
Nobody spoke until-
"Ouch!" Alice hissed, withdrawing her hand from Mally's reach. She inspected the tiny pinprick of blood that had escaped when her hairpin had pierced the skin and sucked on it to stop its small dribble of blood.
"I did warn ya Alice!"
Alice only snorted in laughter, rolling her eyes.
Tarrant Hightopp decided that a stroll through the Red Castle grounds was in order.
He had struggled to sleep the last two nights due to the weirdest dreams. He had visions of a young blonde haired woman, the same lady he had seen in the vision of him dancing…on…the…he couldn't remember the day but he felt it had been a very important event in the tales of Underland.
Then there was the one strong reoccurring one of going back home…maybe sometime after the event of the other vision, and pushing over his hallway table, throwing books off their shelves and kicking them across the room in what he guessed had been anger.
He'd stormed through his house, clearing the contents of tables and desks, any surface or cupboards being thrown askew and punching walls…
Tarrant blinked, surprised to see that his surroundings were dark and cool.
The breeze on his face was gentle and he sound smell a sweet scent on the air, reminding him of fresh fruit and the spring months when Underland's leaves on all the trees fell off the trees.
Then he heard the singing, and it was a rhyme that with such a shocking clarity, he realised that he remembered singing himself.
"Twinkle Twinkle little bat,
How I always wonder where you are,
shinning like a tea tray in the sky…"
Almost as if he had no control over his body, he found himself strolling towards the angelic singing and he guessed who it was before he round the corner in the maze which the voice was coming from.
In the centre on a stone bench surrounded by red roses, he found Jesse Wayton humming and singing alternatively to herself, her head bent over a pad of paper and she was clearly writing something.
Tarrant hadn't heard himself singing the words again as he walked closer to her. She looked up slowly and smiled once she recognised who it was.
"Good brillig Tarrant!" she said cheerfully. Covering up her notes she rested them on the ground near her feet under the bench. He came, uninvited, and sat beside her and removed his black beret, twisting it in his pale white yet stained hatter's hands.
"You seem…quiet Tarrant" she said, more concerned after beat of uncomfortable silence. "Is everything alright?"
He sighed, exhaling slowly and deliberately.
"I cannae sleep lass" he said, his Scottish brogue apparent but he wasn't at all clued up to why he sounded like it then.
"And it's irritating you a little?" she said knowingly, looking sideways at him.
He nodded.
"Well" she said slowly. "Have you ever tried counting?"
"Counting?' he said, staring at her.
"Yes" she said, nodding enthusiastically. "I count sheep. Sheep is the most common. Just lie down, close your eyes and imagine that one sheep at a time is jumping past you and you just count 'One sheep, two sheep' and so forth."
His eyes, green and vivid, were narrowed in a slightly mocking way, as if he thought she was bonkers.
"Ask anybody else!" she said stubbornly, folding her arms impatiently. "I thought I would offer you my suggestion. If you don't like that, then why not have a hot cocoa before you sleep? I have some if you don't have any."
"The hot cocoa sounds more…rational" he decided slowly.
"How boring" Jesse said scathingly, turning away from him on the bench. "That's like you don't think that if you don't like white roses you would replant them all, rather than paint them red!"
"Why would yeh do that lass?"
"Tarrant, have you ever wondered what it would be like to fly?" she asked, excitedly.
Tarrant narrowed his eyes again but some foreign part of his brain had made itself know and was rambling.
To fly? Why, that sounds quite thrilling! Thrilling because I would be flying as one would see and I would spread my arms and glide around and through the soft wisps of cloud. It would pass the time until my Alice returns anyway…
Alice? What or who is Alice?
"You're frowning Tarrant, have I upset you?"
Jesse's voice broke through his persona and he was rattling off exactly what his mind had recited a few moments ago until…
"Tarrant!"
"Fez…fez…I'm fine."
Alice knew what she was doing and she had smiled in delight unknown to Tarrant as he had become her Hatter for a whole minute until she had snapped him out of his ramblings.
"Tarrant, let me go get you that hot coco and then you can sleep your tiredness off. You do look rather worn out and you need your strength if you want to beat me in our dance-off!"
"I could beat yeh with meh eyes closed lass and wheth no music!" he said proudly.
Jesse rolled her eyes, getting up and retrieving her notes.
"In your dreams Tarrant Hightopp" she said as she walked away towards the entrance to the castle.
If only yeh knew his internal voice crooned softly.
The image Tarrant had was of a vulnerable wise hatter, sprawled on his living room floor, a moderate gash on his left arm from where he'd caught his arm when he'd punched the wall and caught his sewing machine.
The hatter in his head moaned softly and tears spilled over and raced down its cheeks. In his hands, he clutched a small pale blue dress, no bigger in height than his palm.
Tarrant blinked hurriedly and wheezed as another memory came up.
"Get of meh! Get away from meh! Yeh donnae want tehe come in 'ere!"
"Tarrant, please stop this! She'll be back soon!"
"It's been three years Mally!" he roared, making the small white dormouse jump back in fright.
"Alice won't come back the meh! I was foolish and slurrvish to even considerate the idea! I'm the Mad Hatter! . .Me? The answer is that she donnae!"
"Alice" he whispered and the name brought a fountain of hurt and sadness, mixed with loving tenderness and affection, a protectiveness and a desire to hold in his arms.
Remember to keep faith in me the phantom angel on his shoulder pleaded with him, crooning in his ear, making him shiver. Just be patient my darling Mad Hatter.
My god this took me a stupid amount of time to type out. I had all the ideas in my head but too many fantasies and ways to play out my climatic scene kept overrunning in my head! Argh!
Happy reading!