~What Am I Feeling?~
~Chapter 37- Special Innocence~
Albus lay on his bed, his legs swung over Scorpius' lap as he traced the curves on his boyfriend's hands. He watched Scorpius carefully; the blonde was focused on his Charms book, trying to ignore the tickling sensation on his palm.
The Potter was smiling as he watched his boyfriend, ragged hair in difference to his usually quite well groomed. They had just had a serious snogging session, starting out with Albus trying to distract Scorpius from their studying. In the end Scorpius pushed Albus away, insisting that they were there to revise.
But now, Albus couldn't focus. His boyfriend was far too beautiful for his attention to be anywhere else.
Scorpius flicked his eyes over Albus' face which was fixed on his. He groaned and collapsed over Albus' legs, "Why can I never concentrate when you're around?"
"Because I distract you with my shear sexual appeal." Albus grinned cheekily.
Scorpius blushed but rolled his eyes, "Oh yeah, that's it."
"Come on Scor! We've been studying for ages!" Albus forced his upper body off the bed so he could enfold his arms around Scorpius' form, "Let's just relax together now!"
"You mean I've been studying."
"Well, you put so much hard work in that it counted for the two of us."
Albus turned a sulking Scorpius' face, smirking at the younger boy. He gazed into those youthful silver eyes and thought about how young Scorpius looked, even though he was turning seventeen soon. The boy had the face of an angel, so innocent. It almost made Albus feel guilty for what they were planning to do on Scorpius' birthday. How could he taint something so pure? No, taint wasn't the right word. Surely they would be just making a bond, so special, beyond anything before? Albus had to think of it that way. He loved Scorpius and Scorpius loved him. That's all that mattered.
Their lips lied within a breath of each other. They didn't hesitating in moving that tiny little bit so they feel into a deep kiss, one of a million, yet still felt just as special as the first.
When a loud shout came from outside Albus' room, the boys jumped away from each other in fright. They watched the door, waiting for someone to burst in but they never came. The screaming only continued coming. That was when they realised it was from downstairs.
The boys rushed downstairs, standing close together. It became obvious it was a female's voice and when they stepped into the kitchen, it wasn't surprising as there was only one person who could often yelled and shouted like that.
Victoire stood, a few metres from Teddy, screaming at the top of her lungs at the man. Harry and Ginny stood at guard, a few feet away from them. Albus and Scorpius didn't understand why either Victoire or Teddy were here, but that wasn't the concern at the moment.
"I can't believe you would break my heart like this, Teddy! You led me on!" Victoire screeched. Still, Victoire hadn't let go the short relationship between her and Teddy all those years ago. It was almost as if she thought she was still with Teddy in some weird way. She was extremely self-centred, so everything Teddy did seemed to result back to her, in her mind.
"I ended what we had ages ago." Teddy was looking at her sceptically. It was clear to anyone other than Victoire that he though she was completely pathetic.
"You still led me on Teddy! And then just dropped me for somebody else! And with all people, my uncle? A man? It would have been bad enough if it was with one of my female relatives! But when it's with a man, and my Uncle! And that's what makes it disgusting, Teddy!"
They all saw something in Teddy turn at that point. His sceptical look turned into one of shock, then one of pure hatred and anger. Something turned. And then Teddy lost it.
Scorpius had never seen his cousin like this before; so out of control, yet impassioned about something. His hair and eyes were a bright red with utter rage.
Harry had to grab Teddy's shoulders to keep him from leaping at Victoire. She stepped back, letting out a small shriek, just as shocked as the rest were at Teddy's outburst.
"I will not tolerate anyone who says mine and George's relationship is disgusting!" He yelled with furrowed eyesbrows," Because it is not! It isn't! There are people out there who are not in love with their partner, who don't even care about them! There are people who fall out of love every day! But I love George! I truly love him and he truly loves me!" He ripped his shoulders away from Harry's grip, "There is nothing disgusting about that! Nothing disgusting about wanting to be with someone you love so wholly! But being with someone you don't love and lying to yourself and your partner, that's disgusting!"
Everyone stared at the boy in complete awe. It only showed quite how much Teddy did really love George but not only that, his frustration with people being against them. Who could blame him? Albus knew if he and Scorpius had to tell everyone and someone said something like that and they said something like that about their relationship , he would lose it too…
Harry dragged Teddy back, placing a comforting hand on his god-son's shoulder, "Teddy, go upstairs with Albus and Scorpius. You need to calm down."
Teddy panted and looked over at Albus and Scorpius. He nodded slowly before stepping towards the other boys, not even bothering to look at Victoire. She stood stunned.
Albus and Scorpius followed Teddy who stormed straight upstairs and to Albus' room. He flung the door open and collapsed onto the bed, letting out a frustrated growl.
"Teddy… are you alright?" Albus asked hesitantly and sat down on the bed next to his god-brother.
"Yeah… Y-yeah… she just frustrates me so much, y'know?" Teddy mumbled into the covers of the bed, "I just came here to speak to Harry and Ginny and she must have heard I was coming. She just ran in here and started yelling at me about George! When she said we were disgusting… that- sorry, I just lost it…"
"It was out of order what she said," Albus agreed as Scorpius slipped into his arms beside him, "She doesn't know anything. None of them do."
"I need something to distract me. Just… just talk about something else before I lose it again."
"Um… Albus is rubbish at studying?" Scorpius suggested sheepishly.
"I'm actually very good at studying. Just not when you're here." Albus squeezed Scorpius' sides, earning a giggle.
"Al! Stop it!" Scorpius pushed the other boy away, "You're going to fail your NEWTs!"
Albus put a hand over his heart, "I'm hurt, Scorpius. It's nice to know you have so much faith in your boyfriend."
Teddy turned over at that point, smiling at couple, "You two are just adorable together."
Scorpius blushed though Albus grinned proudly, "Thank you!"
"I still can't believe I didn't realise you were together," Teddy shifted so his arms were crossed behind his head, "It makes so much sense… George has been describing you as a real life Romeo and Juliet."
Albus chuckled, "It's true in a way… I'm Romeo though." Albus winked at Scorpius.
Scorpius pouted playfully, "Why can't I be Romeo?"
"Because I'm the man in this relationship."
Scorpius scoffed, "I am a boy too, you know…"
"Which of you is the Romeo out of you and George, Teds?" Albus laughed.
"Oh, I'm the Juliet for sure. He's the Romeo," The Metamorphmagus laughed, "I like being Juliet. Means I get spoilt. And you get to have a strange hold over Romeo too… it's not all that bad being Juliet, Scorpius."
Scorpius wrinkled his forehead, "I am still a boy though!"
"Can I ask- only because you're so cute and I don't know whether you can really be that innocent or not- have you… done the deed yet?"
The blonde flushed immediately and pulled his legs up to his chest. Albus' eyes widened, then he scratched his neck nervously, "W-well no… We haven't…"
Teddy raised his eyebrows, "Oh come on… two handsome teenage boys, raging with hormones… I don't believe that you haven't had sex yet."
Scorpius' blush only deepened and again, Albus was the one to speak up, despite his embarrassment, "We've done stuff but just… not gone all the way."
"Wow. That was the first thing me and George did," Teddy snickered, shaking his head, "How far have you gone?"
Scorpius buried his face in his hands and this time Albus had to laugh at him, "Um… just touching."
"Clothes or no clothes?"
The younger let out an uncomfortable groan but Albus continued to mutter, "Clothes b-"
"Wow. And it's been nearly a year?"
"Stop it Teddy!" Scorpius squealed.
"Haven't you talked about it?"
Albus shrugged, "Yeah, obviously… but we haven't been ready… and anyway, we've… we've talked about going for it on Scorpius' birthday… you know, so it's special and stuff."
"You can't really just stamp a date on these things… they normally just kind of happen. In a way it makes it better." Teddy said softly.
Scorpius poked a gap through his hands and his eyes watched Teddy and Albus through them. Albus let out an exasperated sigh and bowed his head, "It's not the same. It's… it's our first time."
"The question is, are you ready? Because if you are, it will happen when it happens."
Scorpius nibbled his lip guiltily.
~X~
Teddy went home after having dinner with the family. Scorpius was still not due to go home for another two hours, so they headed upstairs.
Scorpius had been unusually quiet at dinner, even more so than normal. Albus had kept sending him worried glances but Scorpius was avoiding his gaze. He wondered if talking so openly to Teddy about their sex life, or lack of it, upset him. It probably did and Albus felt stupid for being so insensitive.
On the way upstairs, Albus enclosed Scorpius' hand in his. He looked to the smaller boy cautiously, "Are you okay?"
Scorpius quickly nodded, "Y-yeah."
Albus opened the door to his room, leading Scorpius inside. When the door was shut behind them, Albus was surprised to have Scorpius pressed up against him, kissing him with fervour.
The brunette let out a moan of surprise as he was pushed back against the door, Scorpius slamming his lips upon Albus' again while holding the front of Albus' shirt. Albus wanted to sink into the kiss so much. It was turning him on unbelievably, Scorpius had never acted with such drive before but he knew he had to stop it, to question it.
Albus pushed Scorpius off him, holding his boyfriend by the shoulder. They both panted lightly, a glint of distress in Scorpius' eye as he looked longingly at Albus.
"What on earth are you doing, Scor?" Albus asked with a breathless chuckle.
"I-I thought you wanted to…" Scorpius whispered ashamedly, "Y-you know… with what Teddy was saying earlier… I-I thought maybe I was keeping you waiting or something… and you wanted this… I don't know, Al…"
"Scorpius," Albus took the pale cheeks of his love in his hands, "Yes, I want you and I want you in that way but I want us both to be ready, both to be happy with it-"
"I am ready, Al," Scorpius insisted, "I am. I know I cringe when we talk about it and get nervous but I know that I love you and trust you. I am completely ready for this. And Teddy said that it should happen when we are ready, w-which is now!"
"Sh, sh," Albus pulled Scorpius into his chest, "Well I don't agree with Teddy. I think first times should be prepared for and well thought out, when you're young at least. I've rushed a first time once before and it didn't end well, though now I'm happy it didn't… But I don't want this to end badly of course… and if that means planning in advance then so be it," Albus brushed his thumbs over Scorpius' face, "I want it to be special… and yeah, we're ready now but it means that in a few weeks we'll be even more ready. And we'll be completely alone and it will be your birthday," Albus tipped his head to the side, smiling, "And then after that… it will happen 'in the moment' hopefully a lot of times."
Scorpius ducked his head in embarrassment, resting on Albus' chest, "I'm sorry."
"It's okay, you've got nothing be sorry about. I just want you to know how much you mean to me."
"You mean the world to me too."
~X~
A/N: So that was a bit intense but tension is always a bit exciting...
There was a bit of sex talk in this chapter... And I'm sorry to say, and I'm WARNING you that next chapter is much worse! Of course it will only be talking about it but if you don't want to read, it's probably not necessary to but yeah :)
Thank you to BlackDawnRose, Curly Wurly Me, lordsteinman and KraytonWilliams15 for reviewing the last chapter!
Next chapter:: Albus and Scorpius go to get advice. But did they go to the right people?