AN: Hello friends. It's me! I'm back (ducks and hides - is anyone still there?). For those still here, thanks for being so patient with this story. I have been struggling with my writing for a while now and I'm not sure why. Maybe these episodes are getting to me more than I thought! Can we say intense? Anyway, I hope this was worth the wait. It feels a little jumbled to me, but hopefully you can follow! This chapter sort sets the stage for the next few chapters. Please leave me your comments, they make my day! They really do!

Chapter 9

In an eerily familiar manner, the three wonderful McCord children bounded into the foyer to meet their father as he walked in the door to their home. They enveloped Henry in hugs, hellos and love yous. Elizabeth watched and it reminded her of the scene just a month or so earlier when she had opened the door when she arrived home from Iran. A similar, sad smile graced her husband's features and she knew he felt it too. He knew what Elizabeth felt like – so happy to be home and alive, yet so much lingering pain.

Elizabeth and Will eventually shooed the kids away, and moved to settle Henry on the couch with a book and blanket. Will and Stevie quickly got around to making dinner while Jason & Ali tried to entertain their father while Elizabeth retreated to the bedroom to unpack their things.

*****Quiet Pain*****

Stevie sensed her brother and sister were struggling to be positive and happy around their father as she stirred the stew she was making.

They were relieved he was okay and home, but it was strange for him not to be able to talk to them. Ali especially had a close bond with her father and could always talk to him about anything.

Jason was quick to excuse himself, always one to bury his feelings. But Ali tried to be the good daughter and sat with her father on the couch, re-counting to him tales of her last week at school. She was trying not to show disappointment when her father couldn't respond to her.

Henry smiled at his daughter and ran his hand over her smooth dark hair, trying to soothe the nerves he sensed from her. "Ali, you are on your phone all the time…I thought me texting you was preferred" he texted her.

He finally managed to get a slight laugh from Ali and she leaned in and hugged him. "I should let you rest. You look tired." She finally said a few minutes later, leaving Henry alone in the living room.

Stevie watched from the kitchen as her sister hugged her dad and left. She continued to stir the stew as she heard her phone beep. A text from her father. "Smells good in there….can I help?"

Stevie smiled slightly and texted back, watching her sister walk up the stairs "No way. Mom would kill me if I let you off the couch."

Will came up behind Stevie a few minutes later and said. "Why don't you go up and check on them. I can handle this stew."

******Quiet Pain *******

Elizabeth methodically pulled the items from the suitcase and put them away. As she pulled each of Henry's sweaters from the suitcase, she held the material to her nose, breathing in his scent. She normally hated laundry, but smelling Henry's sweaters as she put them away was always what made the chore worth it. It was a habit she developed long ago, when he was deployed. When she had pulled the clothes from the drawers a week ago when she flew to Miami, she wondered if she'd ever get a chance to put the clothes away again. Smelling the sweaters as she folded them in the drawer was a comforting reminder that they were in fact home again.

Unbeknownst to her, her three children stood in the doorway of her bedroom, watching as she smelled her father's sweaters before putting them away. It told them that she had been scared too, as they were now, seeking comfort in the familiar.

As Elizabeth turned, she noticed them out of the corner of her eye and walked over to them, concern written on her face. "What's wrong guys?" she asked them reaching out to them. "I thought you were keeping your dad company?"

Ali was on the verge of tears and Stevie gently pushed her emotional sister and confused brother into the bedroom. Elizabeth sat down on the bed and the kids surrounded her.

"Is dad really okay?" Ali asked

"Of course baby." Elizabeth said, stroking her daughter's hair.

"But he can't talk. He has a brace on his neck. How is that okay?"

Elizabeth frowned and looked all her children in the eyes. "Look. I know it's hard. And Scary. But remember when I came home….I was injured…but I'm fine now. And Dad is going to be fine too." She knew there was chance this was as okay as he would ever be and it was scary. But she had to be positive. "I know it's weird that when you talk, he can't speak back. I've been with him for a few days….and it bothers him too. So we need to be there for him and make him comfortable. Treat him like you would any other day, okay? Can you do that?"

The kids nodded with tears in their eyes. It was a similar conversation they had with their Dad when they found out Elizabeth's status in Iran was unknown. This however was new to Jason and he just followed the lead of his sisters.

Elizabeth opened her arms and all three kids hugged her, letting their tears fall in front of her only, so as to not upset their father. She hugged them all, soothing them. Stevie and Allison remembered a similar moment their shared with their father, sharing relief that their mom was coming home. They felt a similar relief that they were all back together again, but a similar fear in watching their father not be able to speak, similar to how they had watched their mother shut the world out. They watched as their father slowly brought her back, and they had faith their mother would do the same for their dad.

Will had been watching for a couple of minutes, touched by the sight of Elizabeth holding her three amazing children in the center of the bed as if they were little. He gently rapped his knuckles on the door frame, causing four pairs of crying eyes to look at him. "I don't mean to interrupt, but dinner is ready."

Elizabeth nodded and kissed her kids one by one as they got up from the bed, wiping their eyes and moving to the hallway, prepared to put on a happy face for their dad at dinner.

"Stevie wait." Elizabeth said as she stood. Stevie turned to her mother. Elizabeth pulled her into her own hug. "Thank you for holding down the fort while I was gone." She whispered into her daughter's hair. "You are such a strong young lady….I'm so proud of you."

Stevie pulled back, it was a wonderful complement from her mother. She always did her best to emulate her, in all honesty, it was her mother she should thank for her strength. "Thanks for taking care of dad, and bringing him back." She said instead.

Elizabeth nodded, kissing her forehead. "I love you baby." She was at a loss for words. She was so fiercely proud of her eldest, and saw so much of her younger self within Stevie.

*****Quiet Pain*****

Silence.

It was a deafening sound. A sound Elizabeth McCord hated. Silence was different than quiet. Quiet she appreciated. Silence she did not.

Since Henry had been home yesterday it had been uncomfortably silent in the house. After the kids left for school & Will had left for home – promising to return for Easter with Annie & Sophie, it left just Elizabeth & Henry in the house.

It had been deafeningly silent all day and she couldn't bear it. Henry seemed to be taking it well, trying to rest. Henry enjoyed quiet. He always said it was a welcome break from his loud family growing up. He read for much of the time, leaving Elizabeth alone in her office trying to catch up on emails, but to no avail, simply overwhelmed by her the sound of her thoughts.

He hadn't really needed her home, he could walk around and get things for himself. But she wanted to take care of him as he had done for her so many times. It was that simple gesture of being at home with him, without the kids in total silence that really was eating at her. She could hear the ice dropping in the fridge, the furnace coming on and off, the clock ticking. It was too much. She felt the need to escape!

Even later that night when the children were home, she heard gaps of silence. It wasn't a clearly recognizable sound, but it was rather the absence of what usually could be heard in their home that stung. She could hear the strain the children were feeling that they had told her about the previous day. They weren't outwardly showing it; they were all being sweet to their dad. As Elizabeth washed the dishes, she could hear Ali holding a one sided conversation with her father as they played a game of chess.

She could feel her husband's distress that he had to text his daughter his witty comebacks instead of them just rolling off his tongue. Allison's laughter was delayed a few seconds as she received the text.

After the dishes were washed; Elizabeth made her way into the living room. She sat on the arm of the couch and stroked her daughter's long hair. Allison wisely took the hint from her mother and excused herself. Elizabeth smiled as she left and bent to kiss her husband. "How are you feeling?" she asked.

Henry shrugged his shoulders and yawned. Elizabeth immediately knew he was tired and helped him to bed.

As they lay beneath the sheets, silence enveloping them once more she rolled to him and stroked his cheek. "Do you think you would be okay for a while tomorrow alone?"

Henry nodded, but looked at her – his eyes glistening with concern in the dim light. What's wrong babe? Something's been bothering you all day.

"Okay. I was just thinking I should go to work for a while….you know we've got the peace deal signing coming up….so." She trailed off, feeling a little guilty. She couldn't possibly burden her husband with her worry – he needed to focus on getting better. He didn't need to worry about how she was coping.

Henry couldn't speak his response, so he simply brushed her lips with hers, indicating that it was okay that she go. He knew the peace treaty was important; she'd risked her own life for it. But there was more to it than that. He would get to the bottom of it.