Thank you for your review and having picked this story to read, also in this chapter it has Germancest so watch out if you don't like, the story doesn't resolve around it but it includes it, also we have kind of OOC Ivan but please…

Enjoy

When Ludwig arrived at home he leaned over to the Russian and kissed him softly. "Don't say a word until I talked to my brother...you know he hates you and that you raped his little brother didn't made it better..."

Ludwig got out of the car and slowly walked to the door, always waiting for Ivan. He walked in and grinned. "I'm back brother!"

Ivan watched as he was taken out of the police station, it was weird to think just yesterday he was thinking that he would never see this German again, and here they were. The world can be so fucked up sometimes, making him believe something that wasn't true.

Ivan sat in the car as he thought about his future; it was going to be hard to be a bet. He wondered what would happen if he disobeyed, would he be punished. And how? Normally he punished his pets by raping them, but he never had bottomed before since those childhood nights, and what would the punishment be if it wasn't rape?

Ivan smirked when he was realised from the car and when he heard Ludwig speak, of course Gilbert hated him, and he did hear him rape his brother over the phone. This was going to be interesting, Gilbert would probably want to hurt him or kick him out or worse.

Ivan nodded like a puppy and it disgusted him, but he went along with it. He walked into the house and noticed that Gilbert was sitting down with his pet, as he watched some telly. It was weird to see him without his uniform and weapons, but he still looked fuckable. The Russian wondered if he could make Ludwig jealous, it would be nice to see his reaction, but not now.

Ivan heard Gilbert speak, "where have you been? I missed your tight-" Ivan giggled when Gilbert finally turned around and saw him standing behind his brother.

This was going to be fun.

Ludwig walked over to his brother, bends down and kissed him greedy. "I missed you too, but I had to work. And I have new toy now...and you still owe me a lot for the deal you crashed. This is the payment. Don't touch him, don't be nasty to him and don't try to discuss it with me" he whispered in his ears and kissed his cheek then.

"He's mine now...but I always will be yours..." he whispered and watched his brother.

Ivan watched as they kissed, and oh he wanted to get his gun and shoot Gilbert in the stomach and watch as he bleeds to death, slow and painful. How dare he touch him, that wasn't allowed! He was tainting his beauty, that brat. Ivan knew that Ludwig was trying to tease him, to annoy him, to try and get back at him for that night. Well Ivan wasn't going to go down that easily.

Ivan had excellent hearing, so it didn't matter that Ludwig was trying to keep his words quiet because Ivan heard every single word, and it would be a lie if he said the words didn't hurt. Oh they hurt more then he would ever let the other know.

Ivan shivered when he heard Ludwig call him his, and his toy, Ivan didn't know why but it excited him. Ivan suddenly just remembered that he wasn't tied up anymore, and he could do what he wanted. Maybe he should get back at Ludwig for those words.

"What if I wanted to touch him, I still remember the way you were Gilbert, and you were so good in bed! The way you moaned, and how tight you were… mmmm… I wouldn't mind feeling that pleasure again" Ivan said as he placed his gloved hand under Gilberts chin and guided his face close to the German, before leaning down and kissing him. He climbed onto the sofa, and sat on Gilberts lap as he kissed him violently and he opened his eyes to see Ludwig.

He just gave him a wink, before continuing to kiss the brother in front of him.

Ludwig watched them. "Then I wish you two a lot of fun," he smiled. Ludwig felt nothing about that. He wasn't jealous or angry. His brother could fuck everyone he wanted and Ludwig also didn't mind to share his toys with his brother.

"But Ivan darling, don't forget one thing...if we say stop, you stop..." he grinned and sat down next to him. "Little slut..."

He turned in the TV. If they would really fuck it wouldn't be the first time that Ludwig sat next to him. Several times his brother got drunk home with a new conquest and Ludwig sat in the living room and watched TV. So why should he go away?

Ivan felt anger run through him when he saw Ludwig act like he was doing nothing, that he was just playing a game. That's the moment he knew that Ludwig would never love him, and would never be able to. He was just a toy, to be fucked and hated.

"I need to piss," Ivan said with no emotion as he left the room and ran into the guest room, where he would be staying.

When he reached the room, he turned around and locked himself in there, so that Gilbert or Ludwig couldn't come in. He started sobbing, he was inconsolable.

No one could describe what it feels like when someone you love doesn't give a fuck about you, it feels like your brain goes completely clear of anything but their face, and a hole has appeared in your throat that keeps growing down to your heart, and you can't feel anything but that void. That's what Ivan was feeling.

He feels as if the world is being torn to shreds and that everything is falling apart at the seams. He couldn't stand the fact that Ludwig would never love him.

How could he bring him back into his life, just to tell him that there was nothing between them, that he would gladly watch as he fucked someone else and not bat an eyelash? He thought as tears stream down his face.

What has happened to him, why was he acting like a stupid teenager? Why was the German making him feel like this, he never used to be like this?

Suddenly Ivan felt numb as this point, as the events of his childhood came rushing back to him again; he screwed his eyes shut, as the tears rolled down his face. He slides down to the floor; he hugged his knees and ducked his head down to rest on his kneecaps. It was all he could do before falling apart at the seams.

He doesn't love you.

You're just good for a fuck.

He fucking hates you.

He broke down then, sobbing hysterically. He clutched his hair, his body was shaking, and tears were falling down his face.

Ivan was crying now, deep unrelenting sobs that felt like they were going to rip him apart from the inside, "Why can't anyone love me?" his words were quiet now, barely audible to his own ears. He wasn't sure how to stop crying now that he had started; the tears just kept coming in waves. He just wants to die.

"I fucking love you"

Ivan felt his chest constrict, a tightness that hindered him from breathing, and he took in a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

It only took a few minutes till he was choking for air through his loud sobs. All he knew was that it hurt, it hurt knowing that he would never be loved, it hurt knowing one day he would die and now one would give a shit, it fucking hurt.

EVERYTHING JUST FUCKING HURT.

He didn't think it was possible to have this many tears stored in him, he curled deeper into a ball.

He slowly breaks down and he just cries and cries. This pain was the worst pain he had ever felt in his whole life. It hurt so much. He needed to stop the pain; he needed to forget about this pain even if it is for a second.

Ivan suddenly noticed the open window; he got up and walked towards it. He smiled through his tears; seriously Ludwig didn't have much security did he? Ivan knew that he could never look at Ludwig's face again, he needed to leave.

Suddenly he felt something break inside him; he stopped crying and turned stone cold.

It wasn't like Ludwig could find him. Last time was a onetime thing.