Chapter 10

Chapter Theme Song: Automatic Loveletter - Don't Let Me Down (House is empty, no one's watching. Kiss me once you never stop please. Angels bleed and fall in silence. Everything feels right with you.)

Brendan drove Tommy's car to the apartment, while Tess followed behind. I drove ahead. Tommy still had to renew his license, so Brendan parked it in the parking garage for him. Tommy didn't come with is, he just nodded and took off jogging down the street. Brendan told me that I would probably have to get used to that.

I stopped by my office to drop something off. I rarely ever need to be in the office, I usually just email everything to my boss. I stayed a little longer in the office than expected to catch up with co-workers, but I left by 2 PM. Then, I went back to Tommy's. He wasn't there so I assumed he was still out. It had been two hours since breakfast. I didn't have the key so I went back downstairs to the front lobby to wait for Brendan and Tess so I could lead them to my sister's.

I was more tired than I had ever been in my life. My arms were limp from carrying boxes. We had to make a few trips from my sister's house to mine. Tess, Brendan, Anna, James and I were exhausted by the time we had finished. I knew Anna was probably glad to not have my boxes and furniture crowding her garage anymore.

The whole day I thought about what Tess and Brendan had said to me. I think you could be good for him. You're exactly what he needs right now.

I couldn't lie, that really made me happy inside. Tommy and I together? I was starting to think about what it would actually be like to be in a relationship with Tommy. Not boy Tommy, but with Tommy, the strong, caring passionate, man. I prayed it wouldn't be harder this time around - to get closer to him. I knew about all the things he went through in Iraq and he just got out of prison for god's sake. I really hoped that it hadn't completely hardened him. I knew he was excited to see me and was opening up more , but I couldn't be sure.

I was never sure of anything with Tommy.

When I got back it was about 7 PM. The only light in the room was coming from the TV and the slightly open curtain. Tommy was sitting on the couch watching Two and a Half Men. I grinned. He looked so relaxed. I kept quiet and stood by the door watching him. I couldn't help but smile. I was silent as I walked over, trying not to disturb him. I bumped my hip on the counter. He heard me and turned around, but didn't say anything. I hope he didn't think I was trying to sneak past him.

"Sorry, I didn't want to disturb you. Looked like you were enjoying it."

"No, it's cool. You should join me." He moved some magazines to the floor to make room. What am I going to say? What is he going to say? Why didn't I think about this before I came back to his place?

I sat down. I expected him to turn back to the TV. He didn't. I pretended to watch the TV, but I could feel his eyes on me. I looked down. I was never this nervous around him before. Fuck! He knew he was making me anxious and knowing him, he would make me speak first, just to piss me off. He knew how awkward I could be. He was probably laughing inside. Anna would never believe this. Danielle - my drop dead gorgeous sister, she would say, the one who has men falling at her feet, has some guy, nevertheless Tommy Conlon, making her shake in her boots.

I couldn't believe it either, actually. Then again, Tommy was in a league of his own. Finally, I took a deep breath.

"About this morning - " I started, finally turning to him.

"Yeah." He was really going to make me do all the work. I was really annoyed.

"I - Um - about the -" I stopped, hoping he would finally say something that actually added to the conversation.

"The what?" He asked sternly, like he didn't know what I was talking about. He was purposely making me sweat. I rolled my eyes and smirked.

"You know what I'm taking about, Tommy."

"Do I?" He asked, finally starting to smile a little.

How exactly was this going to go? Do I say I want to be with him, that sounded too presumptuous. What if he didn't want to be with me and it was just a one time thing. Or maybe he thought I wouldn't want to be with him and he was too scared to say anything. Oh, god - I hope he didn't think that.
I finally settled on what to say.

"You know that I love you, right Tommy." I stopped. It sounded like I was turning him down. Not a good way to start, I thought. He looked away for a second. "I mean - I want to be with you, Tommy -" I said quickly while grabbing his fingers. "Relax." I stopped myself. "I mean if that's what you want." He gave me a really?, look. Like I should have known that it was obviously what he wanted.

I was staring to wonder if I maybe should have told him the next day, considering the fact that I was heading back home after visiting. Oh, by the way, I love you Tommy, but I'm going home now. Bye. I mean, I couldn't stay at his place forever because I just came back into his life and it would be weird. I didn't want to be clingy. I heard him sigh of relief before he looked at me and smiled. I waited.

"Come here." He pulled me under his arms and I cuddled into his chest. He tilted my chin up slightly and began kissing my lips gently. Then, he leaned back and we continued to watch TV.

Tacoma, Washington - September 1997

Tommy's POV

"Miss Riordan, I'm afraid I have some bad news."

I looked over at my mom.

"Tommy, can you give us a moment?"

I nodded. "Um, sure." I said warily, but I stayed close to the door to listen.

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry to tell you this, but it's heart failure."

"Oh god." I heard her start to cry.

"I know this is quite unusual for someone your age. Thirty nine is quite young."

She didn't say anything.

"I know you don't have any insurance and your welfare isn't going to cover the surgery, but we can still put you on a waiting list for some sort of aid. We can figure out some kind of payment plan where you can pay a little at at time..."

She tried to hold back her tears."And how long could that take?"

"It can be weeks or months, maybe longer. We usually get something within weeks."

She nodded. "Is there anything else you can do. You do know about my..." She paused. "Brain damage." She said quietly. "I can't work."

Brain damage?, I thought angrily. Why the hell didn't she tell me?

"I'm aware, Miss Riordan. What about your son? Tommy, is it? Maybe he can help you a little more."

"He helps enough." She spat back.

"Miss Rior-"

"No, I understand. Thank you."

"So, what are you going to do?

"I don't know, Tommy."

"What do you mean you don't know?" She shook her head.

"Mom, I know you can't work, but I can start taking extra shifts at..."

"You don't have to do that Tommy. I'm taking care of it."

"Mom," He said sternly. "I can help."

"I don't want you doing that Tommy. I don't want you to miss out on things because your busy taking care of me. You work hard enough. I want you to focus more on school."

"Are you serious?"

"Tommy, I will take care of it, just get to bed. Aren't you walking to school with Dani in the morning?"

PRESENT - 3 Days Later

Tommy just happened to be coming out of the shower when I stopped by.

"Knock. Knock" I shouted as I walked in. "You know the door's open, right?"

I bumped into him when I turned the corner. "Oh."

"Hey, babe," He said groggily. He called me babe. I think I could get use to that.

"Oh! Hey. I'm sorry...I just came by to check on you and the door was open."

I stopped. He was practically naked. We were sort of together now, but I still felt uncomfortable.

"It's fine."

I tried to keep my eyes from falling to his slightly glistening chest. He could tell I was staring. He smirked.

"So, what are you up to Danielle?" He said while walking towards his bedroom to get dressed. The way he pronounced my name bothered me. Was he mocking me? I followed anyway.

"Oh, by the way, I got what you asked for." I reached into the plastic bag I had. He opened his dresser and reached for something. Oh - right. "I'll just wait outside," I replied as I headed for the door.

"Wait." He turned me around to face him and kicked the door closed with his foot.

I didn't make any movements and just stared at him, but I knew what he was doing. He pushed me up against the wall and was looking directly into my eyes. I could feel his erection against my thigh.

Then he reached up to slowly to push my hair from my eyes. His hand caressed my face and I found myself leaning in towards his touch. So gently, that I barely noticed his lips brush against my forehead. Subconsciously, I move myself closer to Tommy, so when he laid his forehead against mine, we were now staring directly into each other's eyes. So many emotions were flashing through his eyes - sadness, confusion and fear. Feelings I know all too well, but as I looked deeper, I saw so much more. Passion. Desire. Love.

"You're so beautiful." he whispered, before placing a soft, unsure kiss on my lips.

Then, I started to think. When was the last time I even... Never mind, I didn't even want to think about it. Tommy began to slowly lift the hem of my shirt, all while brushing his fingers gently up my abdomen. I wanted him so bad.

He began to pull me closer.

Finally, he lifted my shirt over my head. I hastily tried to speed up the process of undressing by unbuttoning my jeans. After all, he was already naked.

He smirked at my eagerness, but took my hands away from my jeans and into his. He started to pull me back, towards the bed. Stopping at the foot of the bed, he trailed his hands along my back and stopped to undo my bra.

Cupping his face with my hands, I slowly leaned in, but hesitated as my lips hovered in front of his. Without warning, he crashed his lips into mine holding me close, as if he thought I would disappear into thin air.

He bit my lip begging for entrance, which I eagerly granted. He slid his tongue in my mouth, exploring every crevice.

As I did, his fighting for control only deepened the kiss, with my hands tangled in his hair.

He paused to take a breath and gently unclothed me with caution, yet as slowly as he went - nothing but love spilled from his eyes. Not a single moment of hesitation. With the both of us exposed, I finally took the chance to admire his beautiful body. Every scar. Every mark. Every tattoo. I trailed my hands across his toned skin in wonder. I smiled. I loved this man. I was certain, I didn't care what he had done or what we were. All I knew was that as he stood before me that I had never loved anyone more and probably never would again. I had never wanted anything more and now things were finally going my way.

Could I actually get a happily ever after?

Tommy gently pushed me down onto the bed. I lay naked before him and for a second all I see in his eyes is lust as he stood before me. Want. Need. This time, when he lowered himself onto me, he didn't hold back. He put everything into our kiss, and I find my hands once again entangled in his hair and this time I'm not letting go. Tommy left a trail of hot lustful kisses along my jaw line, not missing a beat. He moved on further down my neck and across my breasts moving down my torso. My back arched from the pleasure and every kiss sends shivers up my spine. And then he moved hovering just above my core and stops. A sense of panic began to sweep through me along with several questions: Is he regretting this? Doesn't he want this? My silent ranting was hushed, as a wave of pleasure so great envelopes me as he dove into my core with his sweet kisses.

"Tommy -" I let out a moan which only egged him on. This time when he stops, I know that he doesn't regret anything. This time, he kneels between my thighs and just as he is about to plunge himself inside me he gives me a sweet smile. A smile that I haven't seen for so long. And then he slowly lowered himself inside me and with him there, I felt complete.

I gasp as he began to thrust inside of me. Faster. Harder. Faster. Harder. I moaned over and over again as he pounded into me. Tommy held on to me for dear life. Fucking me until I felt like I couldn't breathe, and at that point - I never wanted it to end. He would moan softly against my ear- but the sound of my own, would drown his out.

I was about to reach my climax - and he his.

Still hard inside me, he pounded a few more times - and then it came. I dug my fingers into his back and screamed out his name, as he exploded inside of me. With that, we collapsed and Tommy rolled from on top of me and we were lying side my side - just staring into each others eyes. I rested my head on his chest while he grazed his hands up and down my sides.

"I love you so much," he whispered, hoarsely.

"I love you too."

He pulled me closer against his chest and then we both drifted off.

One night, I overheard her having a conversation with someone.

"I know you said never to call, but I need money."
Silence.
"Fuck you. I am not crawling back, I.."
Silence.
"It's not for me, it's for Tommy."
Silence.
"He's sleeping."
Silence.
"I'm not telling you that. You know I can't."
Silence.
"I'm sorry, don't hang up - wait - Fuck!, " She slammed the phone down.

For weeks, they never called us. My mom called them back, but they said our request for assistance wasn't received We had to submit a new one. My mom was pissed, but she tried not to show it in front of me. The whole time we were waiting she was getting worse - coughing up blood and whatever else.

She didn't have anyone that she could ask for help. After marrying Paddy, she cut all ties with her family. They didn't think he was right for her. Turns out, they were right.

I was angry that she wouldn't let me help her, but more mad at myself for listening to her. I was young and didn't think. I've regretted it every day since she passed.

She died a few months before I graduated - March 1998. I grew up a lot after that. It's what made me decide to join the marines. I wanted to do something with my life and I wasn't good at anything else.

I really didn't want to leave Dani, but I couldn't stay there anymore...not after what happened. Staying there would mean that I would have to continue working at Wendy's, which I hated, but it helped with the bills.

I needed a change and wanted to feel apart of something. Like I belonged. The Corps gave me my family.

A/N: Edited.

I didn't write that scene all by myself, btw. ;) I did edit it a bit to make it better.