Not Sick Chapter 6
Recovery: Part 1
Sasuke walked through the tiled halls. It was unnaturally quiet. There were no other midnight travelers, and his footsteps made no noise: it had been a long time since Sasuke had accidentally made noise while moving. Now, he needed to think about it to make sure people knew he was coming .
And today, he saw no need to.
Assassins were supposed to be silent, after all.
He approached a door at the end of the long corridor. It was simple: thick and wooden, just like every other door in this place. There was no dramatic engravings, no gravity to it, to mark what lay beyond.
Rasping sounded from behind the door. Weary, pain filled breathes, each sounding like it could be the last.
Sasuke raised his hand, his fingertips sparking with lightning. A surge of his will, and the lightning extended, flying forward and through the door.
He heard a muffled intake of breath, and a solid thump. Stepping forward, his chokuto flashed from its sheath at his back: the door was cut to pieces in an instant, falling to the floor of the chamber in dozens of tiny chunks of wood.
He passed under the frame, keeping his hand extended, the lightning steady. His chokuto, he kept rested on his shoulder, a sign of carefully controlled carelessness.
What he found on the other side was precisely what he had expected. Orochimaru, withered and hunched, sitting in his bed, his hands pinned to each other by the lightning that had run through them both.
The Sannin hissed, though he didn't seem surprised.
"As I expected, it's come down to this." The pale man did his best to seem like he was ignoring his hands, but there was far too much sweat running from his stringy, false-looking hair to effectively pull off the deception.
Sasuke smirked.
"Hn. There's nothing more you have to teach me, Orochimaru. Now, I will show you my dedication. You will finally see how heartless I can truly be."
Orochimaru smirked back, his features trembling. "Even heartless, you will never be able to defeat Itachi as you are, Sasuke. There is still much you could learn from me."
"Wrong." Sasuke began his inexorable walk forward: the lightning pushed against Orochimaru's hands, and the man's eyes widened. Struggling, he forced the pierced extremities to the side of his body. Sasuke's shaped chakra moved forward with him, and eventually buried itself in the slatted wooden wall.
"I'm stronger than you now, Orochimaru; far stronger than you realize. At this point, I see no reason to go along with this farce any longer. You won't be getting my body. In fact, you won't be getting any other bodies. Today, I end you."
He drew closer, getting to within striking distance of the Sannin. The man stared up at him. The snake-like vertical pupils in his eyes were quivering. The lightning blade had pushed his hand back into the wall, uncomfortably twisting his torso.
"You see, Orochimaru, I'm an avenger. It is my destiny to avenge my clan; but it is not just my clan that I care to avenge. A man who roots around in the bodies of others, who discards human lives like so many broken tools, who desperately attempts to gain the province of those greater than him… a disgusting man like you has given me many, many people to avenge in my time here. And now, all those voices who cried out for justice in you prisons and pits... I will answer them." Sasuke said, his voice growing steadily more agitated.
Sasuke bent close to Orochimaru, the man rendered helpless by his trapped hands and infirm body, and stared into the Sannin's eyes, his Sharingan whirling.
"These are your last breaths. I suggest you spend them wisely." His voice was calm again, but the Sharingan told a different story.
Orochimaru stared back, naked fear plain in his dull yellow eyes. He took a shuddering breath. But instead of speaking, he merely slowly blinked.
When the eyes opened again, they were flat and lifeless. There was no fear: just a silent, chilling menace.
And then the man spoke.
"Sasuke. You truly have failed."
Sasuke froze. That was not Orochimaru's voice. Orochimaru's voice was weak and raspy, its foundations shattered by years of brutal experiments. It had long ago surrendered humanity. This voice was strong. This voice was healthy, and utterly calm.
This voice belonged to Itachi Uchiha.
"Did you truly believe, foolish little brother, that you would triumph so easily?" Even as Sasuke watched, Orochimaru's eyes changed. The dull yellow fled, replaced by a steady, creeping red, which rapidly overtook the pupil shrank, becoming a solitary black orb.
And three tomoe, dark and unmoving, spun into existence around it.
Sasuke staggered back, the lightning blade sinking into his hand. Orochimaru, speaking in Itachi's voice and seeing with Itachi's eyes, stared at him, expressionless.
"That you could win without hate as your sole weapon?" The pale face, cracked and matted with sweat, rendered pale and semi-translucent by infirmity and illness, sloughed off. Beneath, Itachi's aristocratic features became apparent.
Sasuke's brother stepped from the shell of Sasuke's former teacher, his eyes red and disappointed.
"I told you to hate me, Sasuke. I told you to gain the power of the Mangekyō Sharingan. And you defied me. Are you truly so ignorant? Did you think I spoke lies?" Now, it was Sasuke who was retreating, and Itachi who was steadily walking towards him.
Sasuke's throat was frozen with fear. How could he be here?
'Genjutsu!'
"Kai!" he yelled in a hoarse voice, bringing one of his hands up and allowing the lightning to die. Itachi didn't slow, and the world didn't shatter away.
This was no genjutsu.
"I have never told you anything but the truth, Sasuke," Itachi continued.
Sasuke threw himself forward, aiming his sword for Itachi's chest, and the man effortlessly knocked it aside with the flat of his hand, before striking out in the same manner. Sasuke spun back, his cheek stinging, tasting blood in his mouth.
"I did not lie to you when I told you why I killed our parents." Sasuke pulled three kunai from a pouch on his hip and flung them at his brother.
The older Uchiha didn't look away from Sasuke's eyes: both of his hands came up, catching two of the kunai by their wrapped handles completely without effort, and he tilted his head mere inches to the side to allow the third one to fly past his face, ruffling his hair.
"I did not lie to you when I told you should have worked on your aim." He flung both the kunai he had caught, making them collide in the air and sending them flashing towards Sasuke's forehead and gut.
Sasuke brought his blade up and deflected both of the kunai in a single fluid sweep, the sound of ringing steel unusually loud. There was a fraction of a fraction of a second that the sword interposed itself across his vision. In that time, Itachi vanished.
"And I did not lie to you when I said I would train you another day."
Sasuke turned, and his brother's fist filled his vision.
There was a flash of impact, and Sasuke's head rang as he fell back, blood running from his nose. He hit the ground and threw himself into a roll, gaining distance. When he came to his feet, Itachi was gone again.
Sasuke spun about, his sword unsheathed and lightning crackling in his hand. He was no longer in Orochimaru's lair. Now, he was home.
Crows, their feathers pitch black and their eyes red, roosted on every inch of furniture. The dresser, the table, the mantelpieces; the kitchen table was covered in them.
As were the bodies of his parents, rotten and cold, that were seated at it. Crows perched upon them as well, digging their talons into his father's broad shoulders and his mother's dirty black hair.
"This is your training!" The voice came from behind him, and Sasuke instinctively ducked. A tanto flew over his head and decapitated his father's body. The man's head hit the table with a thunk, and the crows flocked to it.
Desperately trying to ignore the sound of tearing flesh as the birds devoured his father's head, Sasuke spun about. Itachi still eluded him; he couldn't see his older brother anywhere.
"You were gifted such magnificent eyes, Sasuke!" The voice came again, and with it, a fūma shuriken. Sasuke leapt to the side, crashing into the wall, and the enormous spinning star buried itself in his mother's body, tipping over the chair she was seated in and sending both crashing to the floor.
The crows clustered around it, abandoning what was left of Sasuke's father's head: Fugaku Uchiha stared at his son, his empty sockets full of accusation.
Sasuke stared back, numb.
Itachi burst from the wall behind Sasuke, his arm wrapping around the younger Uchiha's throat and yanking him back flush against the wood. Sasuke struggled, his legs kicking, but the hold was too firm.
The crows abandoned his parent's bodies and took to the air, massing before him. Gradually, they began to form a familiar shape.
"Eyes that you have not earned." Itachi appeared in front of him, his form born from the crow's own. The body under the cloak rustled, but the face was all too real.
"You did not have the hate to kill your closest friend, Sasuke. And for that, you have failed." He sounded almost disappointed.
"I have more than enough hate!" Sasuke roared, lashing out at the man in front of him. He couldn't reach: his vision was going hazy, the pressure of the other Itachi's arms pressed against his neck filling his head with white noise.
"Really?" Itachi said. "If that's the case-" Itachi gestured, and Naruto Uzumaki burst through the wall behind him. The blond charged Itachi, and the Uchiha placidly turned to face him.
"Sasuke!" Naruto yelled, and pushed a Rasengan forward, burying it in Itachi's chest. The man burst into a flock of crows, and the Uzumaki was left stumbling forward, his technique still going.
It ground into Sasuke's chest, pressing him against the wall with unbelievable force and stealing away the skin of his torso, before Itachi dropped from the roof and slammed Naruto to the ground.
Sasuke hacked up blood, and looked down at the dobe. The blond was squirming, trying to punch, stab, kick, do anything to the man atop him, but Itachi had him securely pinned.
"Then here is your chance." Itachi finished, and the one behind Sasuke released him. The younger Uchiha stumbled forward, lightning covering his hand once more. He stared down at Naruto who looked up at him, snarling. Itachi watched them both with glacial eyes.
"Sasuke! Come on! What are you doing? Get him off me!" Naruto yelled, his voice grating. Sasuke bent down, pressing his hand forward. "He's right there! You don't need to be stronger than him anymore! We can beat him! Together!"
"No." Sasuke mumbled, dragging his eyes back up to Itachi. "You're right, Naruto. I don't need to get stronger." The chidori flashed forward, and stabbed deep into Itachi's throat.
"I'm already more than strong enough!" Blood spilled out, covering Sasuke's hands and splashing into Naruto's hair. It was warm, and slippery. Sasuke's hand made a horrible sucking noise at he withdrew it from his brother's throat.
Itachi fell back, and Naruto rose to his feet. "Wrong again," he said.
Suddenly, it was Itachi standing before him, and Naruto on the floor, gasping and struggling, his hands pressed against the emptiness that should have been his throat. His eyes, blue and fading, locked on Sasuke's for a moment, and his whole body stilled.
Impossibly, even with his trachea vaporized, he spoke, his voice betrayal itself.
"Sa…su…ke." And then he fell back, his eyes closing, and the blood stopped pumping from his throat. Sasuke stared, his mind flooded with a feeling he couldn't possibly begin to identify.
Itachi slammed him against the wall, one arm pressed against his neck. The other one held the kunai that was stuck deep into his stomach. The wound burned.
Sasuke coughed up more blood, splattering Itachi's face: the older Uchiha didn't flinch.
"Always a failure. Never quite good enough," the man said quietly, his Sharingan slowly warping, the tomoe disappearing and being replaced by horrible black sickles.
Sasuke stiffened at the sight of the hated eyes. "You couldn't stop me. You could never stop me. You couldn't save your friends. You couldn't save our family." Itachi bent in closer, sounding disgusted. "You couldn't even save yourself."
Sasuke went slack, the weight of Itachi's words crushing him. His brother continued, relentless.
"No, you don't deserve those eyes, Sasuke. Their power belongs to someone who will be able to use it, and that person is certainly not you." Itachi released the kunai, leaving it in Sasuke's stomach, and the hand came up, shaped like a claw and pressing against Sasuke's face. He could see nothing but it.
"Itachi! Wait!" Sasuke shouted. His brother ignored him.
"Now, Sasuke: give me your eyes." And the hand pressed in.
"Itachi! Nii-san! Stop!"
Itachi didn't stop.
"Please! Sto-!"
There was a terrible burning pain, the sound of something deep within his head ripping, and Sasuke screamed.
The world went dark.
He didn't wake up.
Tsunade Senju, the Godaime Hokage of the Village Hidden in the Leaves, the only female among the Densetsu no Sannin, and the Strongest Woman Alive, considered the papers in front of her.
She'd been staring at it for nearly fifteen minutes, and she still couldn't wrap her head around the import of it.
It didn't help that half the people mentioned in the mission reports were now in the hospital.
Two S-rank missions in one week; one retrieval, and one recon.
The first: a multi-team effort, comprised of five of the most experienced young ninja that Konoha had to offer, two of its elite jōnin, and the Kyuubi Jinchūriki.
The second: carried out alone, deep in enemy territory, by perhaps the single deadliest man left in the Village Hidden in the Leaves after the death of the Sandaime Hokage.
Both successes, though neither had accomplished their primary objectives.
The Uchiha Retrieval mission, a failure on the surface. Itachi Uchiha had escaped to pursue the Hidden Leaf's Jinchūriki once more.
Except according to that Jinchūriki himself, the man had had ample opportunity to capture him and had chosen not to.
Indeed, Itachi Uchiha had assisted the team chasing him in repelling the leader of Akatsuki, the very man that was the goal of the second mission.
Helping his pursuers was a confusing change of pace for an S-Rank criminal, but not necessarily an unwelcome one. And consequently, the Uchiha Retrieval mission had succeeded in a fashion after all. Sasuke Uchiha, absent from Konoha for three years, had finally been returned to it.
Battered, hypnotized, and missing his eyes, but returned nonetheless.
The second mission had come far closer to being a complete failure. Jiraiya of the Sannin, the Toad Sage of Mount Myōboko, had barely returned from Amegakure, the village that had been the subject of his reconnaissance. Tsunade still didn't know what had happened there.
Only that Jiraiya had come back covered in severe burns and scrapes, a hole in his leg, missing his left arm, and that when she had seen him as he was dragged into the hospital, she had been more enraged she had ever been in her life.
Tsunade ignored the twinge in her chest and focused on the files once more.
The Retrieval Mission had encountered eight missing or foreign ninja, ranging from A-to-S-Rank.
Itachi Uchiha, who, after seemingly being killed by a single, invisible jutsu, had assisted the Leaf team against the leader of Akatsuki. In addition, his psyche profile was going to need updating: the genocidal Uchiha apparently wished for world peace, and did not want his brother dead, contrary to all prior behavior.
Sasuke Uchiha, who had been unconscious for the duration of the team's interactions with him, waking only briefly to be removed from the area by Itachi.
Juugo, no last name, who even now was comfortably ensconced in the most secure wing of the hospital, guarding Sasuke Uchiha; attempts to move him had gone… poorly, and so Tsunade had determined that so long as the large man stayed by the unconscious Uchiha, he would be permitted to remain in the village.
Karin, no last name known, who had not been encountered again after the destruction of the Uchiha settlement and much of the surrounding area. However, Juugo had claimed that she had been heading somewhere soon afterwards to meet Itachi Uchiha. Where, and for what purpose, he did not know.
Suigetsu Hozuki, who had apparently been accompanying Karin when she left. He, Karin, and Juugo had called themselves "Hebi", which Sasuke had formed from several of Orochimaru's experiments, with the goal of taking down his brother.
Kisame Hoshigaki, who had departed before the hostilities had begun, returned after they had ended, and then left again in the company of Itachi.
And... Orochimaru. the strangest encounter, considering that it had been reported that Sasuke had killed him. However, Itachi had corrected that apparent discrepancy: he had removed Orochimaru from Sasuke's curse seal (rendering it harmless in the process) and then killed Tsunade's old teammate himself.
And finally, and the most worrisome, a man that had simply identified himself as Pain; a man who had controlled five other bodies simultaneously, and who possessed the legendary Rinnegan, the eyes of the Rikudō Sennin himself.
A man who had singlehandedly engaged Itachi Uchiha, the Konoha Retrieval Teams, and Team Hebi, and would have emerged victorious if not for the surprise interference of Itachi after the man had seemingly exhausted himself fighting the other parties.
A man whose apparent goal was to bring peace to the ninja world through the destruction of innumerable lives, by forging the Bijuu into a weapon capable of leveling whole nations.
If these were not official after-action reports, then Tsunade would not have believed them. This was the kind of story you heard in one of Jiraiya's ridiculous books, not from some of your most trusted shinobi.
But she'd heard it straight from the source, and if she knew one thing about a world that was rapidly getting more complicated, it was that Naruto Uzumaki couldn't lie to save his life.
Sakura Haruno snickered. The snickering soon developed into a muted chuckle, and Sakura brought her hand up in an attempt to slow it.
It was in vain. A second later, she burst into true, real laughter, her entire body shaking with it. She just couldn't stop, despite the flare of pain in her ribs every time she took in another breath.
Naruto Uzumaki stared at her, his face the very picture of despair and desperation.
"Only you, Naruto," she managed to say, almost choking on her words as the laughter threatened to overwhelm her again. She winced as a particularly sharp spike of pain shot through her ribs. "This would only be a problem for you."
"Come on, Sakura!" he said, his face twisting. " "I don't know what to do! I mean-" He twisted his head around, as if he was looking for eavesdroppers and then bent in, whispering. "What the hell do I do? I've never even- I mean- I can't-!"
Sakura's laughter gradually dropped off, and except for the errant chuckle, she was serous once more. "Why do you think I would know, Naruto? This is your problem. Go discuss it with her. I'm not going to help. You'll have to figure this stuff out eventually."
"Can't eventually be in, like, a couple years?" Naruto asked, desperate.
Sakura shrugged. "Apparently not. Which reminds me: have you visited Jiraiya yet?"
When the tracking team had arrived back in the village, they had not presented a pretty picture. Two days moving at high speed through the thick forests of Fire Country, with every single one of their members either exhausted of their chakra or somewhat seriously injured, had left them a rather pathetic spectacle when they'd finally reached the gates of Konoha.
The next couple hours had been a bizarre mix of urgent and incredibly dull: debriefings, arguments over where to put Sasuke Uchiha, visits to the hospital, bed rest… it had seemed surreal that only forty-eight hours earlier, they had all been in the toughest fight of their lives.
Naruto had been discharged from the hospital the day after he'd arrived. Despite the muttering of the various medic-nin responsible for treating him that 'pervasive cellular damage' across the entirety of one's body wasn't supposed to heal in three days, let alone without treatment, the blond had been let out anyway.
There was no reason for him to stay any longer: aside from a nasty case of boredom, there was nothing physically wrong with the Uzumaki.
However, despite being discharged, Naruto still hadn't left the hospital. Too many of his friends were still there. Sakura, Kiba, Shino, and Hinata were still in residence, despite Sakura's excellent field treatment. It would be sheer idiocy to let any of the ninja who had been seriously injured fighting against the leader of Akatsuki simply wander the streets of Konoha.
The pace they had set to get back hadn't helped matters: Naruto knew that Kiba, at least, had popped a rib or two out of place as they returned to the village.
So, Naruto had spent the last few hours visiting his friends, with two notable exceptions. The first was Sasuke Uchiha, who still hadn't woken from whatever his brother had done to him, and besides that was being guarded by both a contingent of ANBU Black Ops and Juugo, who had stuck by the Uchiha for the entire time Naruto had known him.
The second was Hinata Hyuuga, and that was because Naruto was terrified of talking to her.
"Stop trying to change the subject, Sakura! That perv hasn't woken up yet: he's probably too busy having weird dreams."
Naruto hid it better than most thought him capable, but the relief he felt whenever he realised that Jiraiya was alive, that Pain had lied, was the best sensation he'd ever had. If Iruka Umino was Naruto's older brother, than Jiraiya was the closest thing Naruto had ever had to a grandfather. If he had lost him…
Naruto shivered, and redirected his attention back to Sakura, who was trying not to laugh again. He wished she wouldn't do that. This was serious business.
"I can't help you, Naruto," she said. "It wouldn't be fair. And maybe he's awake by now? You really should go check, if you aren't going to-"
"No! No, I'm going to! I mean," Naruto rubbed the back of his head, doing his best to grin but only looking sick, "-what kinda guy would I be if I didn't?"
He backed out the room slowly as Sakura stared at him. "But, uh, you might be right. I'm gonna go see if Ero-sennin is up yet!" And with that, he was gone, and Sakura was left alone in her room.
She turned to look out the window. It was a beautiful day in Konoha. The sun was shining bright, and the streets flocked with people going about their daily business. She spotted a man dressed in all black, probably an ANBU messenger, jumping across a nearby rooftop.
She sighed, thinking of her just-departed teammate.
"Idiot," she muttered, not really meaning it.
Sakura didn't know what to think anymore. The last few days had been so… busy.
Itachi Uchiha had stolen Sasuke's eyes, and then given his own to Sakura, who of course had handed them over to Tsunade as soon as possible. She didn't know what the Hokage would do with them, but after spending two days carrying them around in a jar, she would be happy to never see them again.
She and her friends had fought the leader of Akatsuki, and had nearly defeated him. Sakura herself had even landed a solid hit on him. But in the end, if it hadn't been for Itachi, then they would all be dead. Pain would have taken Naruto, and enacted his crazy plan to bring peace to the world.
Sasuke had been brought back to the village. Naruto had finally done what he'd promised to do three years ago. Sakura wished that she could just be happy that Sasuke was back, but she knew better: now that the Uchiha had returned, it was only going to get more complicated. She just wished she could talk to him.
She didn't know what to expect out of that conversation, but she desperately wanted it anyway.
And apparently, Hinata loved Naruto. Sakura had known about the girl's crush (honestly, who hadn't?) but she hadn't thought her affection had gone that far.
The thought brought a smile to Sakura's face. Whatever the next few days brought, she was assured one thing: watching Naruto try to figure that out was going to be the most hilarious thing she'd seen in her life.
Plus, she doubted Naruto would be asking her out again anytime soon.
Sakura lay back. The sooner she was healed, the sooner she could leave. And the sooner she could leave, the sooner she could see her parents (though she really wasn't looking forward to that conversation), and Sasuke.
She closed her eyes.
Jiraiya opened his eyes.
Light was spilled across his face, bright sunlight. Not in Amegakure anymore, then. There was little sunlight to be had there. He looked to his left, and confirmed it: Konoha, vibrant and colorful, sprawled out beyond his window.
He turned his head, looking back up towards the ceiling. Pale... something. That color that could only be found in a hospital that couldn't decide whether it wanted to be white or dim yellow.
Idly, he wondered why his pillow was so scratchy. He was one of the Densetsu no Sannin; didn't he deserve a more confortable place to rest his head?
Like that girl back in Amegakure. The one with the cow necklace. She would certainly have been comfortable to rest on.
What had been her name?
He couldn't remember. He'd kidnapped her husband, and he couldn't even do her the courtesy of remembering her name.
Huh.
He turned to look back out at Konoha. It had been a long time since he'd been in one of the village's medical facilities. In fact, he couldn't remember the last time he'd been forced to go to one. He hadn't been seriously injured since Naruto had punched a hole in his sternum all those months ago.
Though, he considered, looking down at where his left arm should have been, that streak had come to an end.
Ah well. Even if all of him hadn't made it back, at least he'd made it back. If he had died there, with Yahiko… his knowledge would have died with him. Pain would have become near impossible to stop. And…
Wait. Naruto.
Oh no.
Oh no.
His head was clearing. Now, the room seemed starkly white, and the throbbing where his arm should have been became persistent and violent.
Jiraiya tried to throw himself from the bed, but all he managed was a halfhearted flop that twisted his covers about his body and carried him half off the mattress. He slid to the floor, his whole body protesting every motion. He wasn't even close to fully healed.
Pain had gone after Naruto. His student might be in Pain's possession even now. There was no time to lose. He was probably already too late. How long had he been unconscious? It could have been days. Naruto might already be-
Oh god. He'd failed again. Tsunade, Orochimaru, Nagato, Yahiko, Konan, Hiruzen, Minato… and now Naruto too.
How pathetic. He hadn't even managed to die alongside them.
"Hey, Pervy Sage! You're awake! What're you-"
Jiraiya's head snapped up. Naruto had just walked into his room. He was looking down at him, obviously confused. He wasn't bandaged; all of his limbs were attached. He looked perfectly fine.
"Naruto?" His voice was too high pitched. How was he here?
"Uh, yeah? You okay, Jiraiya-sensei? You look a little out of it."
Jiraiya stared. He couldn't comprehend what he was seeing. "Naruto. You… you're okay?"
This did not help Naruto's confusion. "Well, yeah. Why wouldn't I be? And why are you out of bed? You land on your head or something?"
Jiraiya laid his head back on the floor. It was not any more comfortable than his pillow had been. "I thought… what happened? Didn't Pain-"
"Oh yeah!" Naruto snapped his fingers. "You fought him too, right? He said something about that." He rubbed the back of his head. "Nah, I'm fine. A couple people got pretty messed up, though. Kakashi-sensei still hasn't woken up: he used a lot of chakra. And Hinata-"
He shook his head. "Eh, the point is, everyone's fine. And you too! That bastard didn't get a single one of us!"
'Genjutsu?' Jiraiya considered: this seemed too good to be true. Perhaps he'd been captured after all? He doubted it. He distinctly remembered Gamatate's reverse teleport from Myōboko; arriving at the gates of Konoha. Being a smartass to the chūnin on duty, if only to relish the look on their faces before he'd fallen unconscious.
And if 'Madara' had access to a genjutsu with the complexity of the Tsukuyomi, or something like it, he would have had ample opportunity to place it before Jiraiya had escaped…
Wait. No, that was muddled thinking. There was no way he'd be able to tell if he were trapped in something like that. How was he going to-
"Hey!" Naruto lightly kicked him in the side, not nearly hard enough to actually hurt, but certainly enough to get his attention. "You're freaking me out, Ero-sennin. Get off the floor!"
He looked up at his student. If this was a genjutsu, there was nothing he could do about it; best to play along for now, then.
"You fought Pain?" he asked.
"Yeah!" Naruto said. "It was pretty intense, but everyone turned out okay! But he, uh…" he paused, looking disturbed. "He said you were dead. So I mean, when I got back here, and you were already in the hospital…" He rubbed the back of his head again.
Jiraiya really needed to make sure that Naruto got control of that habit. It was too distinctive: if Tsunade ever saw fit to send the blond on an infiltration mission (though god knows why she would) it would give him away to anyone familiar with him.
"I guess I'm just really glad you're here," Naruto finished, looking uncomfortable. "I mean, you weren't waking up, so…"
"Okay." Jiraiya was starting to get a handle on the situation. He pulled himself from the floor, untangling his blankets. The hospital garb he was wearing barely fit him. He couldn't put any weight on his right leg. "Okay," he said again. "You fought Pain. And you're here? How?"
Naruto grinned. "Oh come on, Ero-sennin! Have a little faith in your student! He was pretty tough, but-"
"No." Jiraiya's voice cut off Naruto's like a brick dropped on a cockroach. "I believe in you Naruto. You know I do. But Pain… he was on a completely different level. Even with backup, there's no way you could have beaten him."
Naruto's smile faded away a little, but he still looked happy. Jiraiya wondered why. "Yeah. You're right. He had me beat. Hinata too."
Jiraiya wondered what the Hyuuga heiress had to do with this.
"But… Itachi Uchiha saved us."
Okay. This definitely wasn't a genjutsu. No way any half-decent illusion would have something so weird in it.
'So that was what he meant. I can't believe it,' was what Jiraiya thought to himself.
"What." was what he said out loud.
"Yeah. I couldn't really believe it at first either. But he showed up and chased Pain off. The guy only had three bodies left by that point, and Itachi killed one of them. And then he did something to the other one, I think it was a genjutsu, and after a minute Pain just left."
Naruto gave Jiraiya a strange half-smile, something that looked just a bit too subtle for his face. "You'll never guess what Itachi did next, though."
"Oh yeah?" Jiraiya didn't think so. After the last couple minutes, nothing could surprise him anymore.
"He gave us his eyes."
Well. Jiraiya had been dead wrong. He just stared down at Naruto as he slowly sat down on his hospital bed. His leg jolted in agony, but he ignored it.
"He-"
"Yep." Naruto confirmed Jiraiya's unvoiced question. "Took them right out, and handed them over to Sakura. Then he left."
Jiraiya finished sitting down. He was glad about that. He was pretty sure he would have fallen over otherwise.
"…Huh," he said. He couldn't really think of anything else that would cover how he felt.
"Naruto?"
"Yeah?"
"Go get Tsunade, will you? I think we gotta talk about some things. Tell her I'm ready to deliver my report."
When Naruto led Tsunade into his master's hospital room, he expected some sort of tearful reunion. While Jiraiya had never really explained to him the intricacies of his relationship with the Godaime, they were teammates.
To Naruto, that guaranteed relief, at the very least. He knew that if Sakura had been hurt the way Jiraiya had, he would have jumped her the moment he was let into her room, injuries be damned.
That was not what happened.
"Disobedient idiot!" the imposing blonde woman yelled as she strode into the room. Her face was twisted in a truly terrifying frown. Naruto, at her side, froze: he knew exactly what that expression meant. "Didn't I tell you not to die? And now look at you!"
Tsunade sounded genuinely furious. Naruto began to consider a tactical retreat. A plan that evaporated when he saw Jiraiya's reaction: the other Sannin just stared up at his teammate, a wide grin splitting his face. If anything, he was the one who looked relieved.
"But Tsunade-hime, I didn't! Look! I'm fine!" Jiraiya attempted to pound his chest with his left arm. The stump that cut off above where his elbow should have been flailed for a moment, and then stilled. Jiraiya glared at it, betrayal clear on his face.
"Well," he amended, "mostly fine. It could have been much worse." His grin began to shrink. It faded entirely as Tsunade took another step forward, murder on her face.
"Don't you dare," she hissed. "Don't you dare joke about this, Jiraiya. You nearly died. Even after you got back, you were already so- the shock alone-" She choked on her words, biting her lip hard enough to draw blood. "I… god… I bet that you wouldn't make it back. So don't… don't…"
Jiraiya's face softened. He sagged. Whether in relief, or something else, Naruto couldn't possibly tell. "You really were worried about me."
"Of course I was!" Tsunade snapped. "How could I not be? You were my teammate, and I just sent you off to die-"
"But I didn't." Jiraiya's voice was strong, and his eyes were hard. It cut through Tsunade's own, and the room was silent for a moment.
"Look," he said, in the same tone. Naruto stared. He almost never saw his master this serious. "We can discuss this later. But right now, I've just returned from an extremely informative recon mission. I learned things there that everyone here-" he glanced meaningfully at Naruto, who unconsciously straightened, "-should know."
Tsunade glared at him, before her eyes lost some of their hardness. She sighed, the most pained sound that Naruto had ever heard her make, and said, in a voice that somehow explicitly promised future beatings while still retaining some trace of understanding, "Very well, then. Jiraiya, report."
The Sannin's face went grim.
"I entered Amegakure without being detected. It hasn't changed much from when we were there last, hime. Still rainy, still miserable." He paused, an indecipherable expression on his face. "But the people… the people are much happier, now."
"Really?" Naruto interrupted. Tsunade glared, but didn't snap at him: inwardly, she was asking the same question. "Why? What changed?"
"Pain," Jiraiya said.
"What?!"
Jiraiya nodded, looking thoughtful. "Pain is the man who rules the Hidden Rain Village now. He deposed Hanzō long ago. How long exactly, I wasn't able to find out, but most of the younger chūnin had never served under anyone else. Hanzō was just a memory."
"How could they be happy with a guy like that in charge? He's a maniac! There's no way!" Naruto gritted his teeth.
Jiraiya shrugged. "In many ways, Naruto, Hanzō was worse. Under him, Ame no Kuni was the battleground that the Hidden Leaf and Stone fought on during the Second and Third Great Wars. Ame may have been an ally of Iwa, but that didn't change the fact that the civilian casualties were horrendous. Pain took over sometime after the wars, and since then there has been peace. The village regards him as a god."
"That's crazy," Naruto said flatly. "A guy like that, being a god…" He shook his head in disbelief. Jiraiya watched him, seeing if he would say more. When it became clear he wasn't going to, the sage continued.
"At any rate, I infiltrated the village, and interrogated some unlucky chūnin. I got most of my information from them. One of them, I sent back to the village."
Tsunade nodded. The intelligence division had been pleasantly surprised when a toad had popped up in nearby pond and spat out an unconscious Rain ninja the day before. Even now, Inoichi Yamanaka was preparing for a session with the man.
"The other, I used as a disguise."
"How'd you do that, Ero-Sennin?" Naruto asked, his face eager. Tsunade turned to him, her brow twitching.
"Naruto," she said, unnaturally calm. The blond instantly took notice. "Shut up, or leave."
Naruto shut up.
Jiraiya watched, trying not to chuckle. He was pretty sure that Tsunade would be after him next, after all. After a moment, he began speaking again.
"Soon after I was discovered." Tsunade stiffened: for her, this was where the story became truly interesting.
"By a woman. 'The Angel', the villagers called her. I knew her by another name, though. Konan."
"I know that name," Tsunade said, her lip twisting.
Jiraiya nodded, his face somber. "Yeah. Do you remember those orphans? The three we encountered just after Hanzō had let us go? They approached us after the battle, asking if we were shinobi. They took our bread."
Realization dawned on Tsunade's. "She gave me a flower," she muttered, before refocusing on Jiraiya. "That little girl? With blue hair? She is this 'Angel' of Amegakure?"
"Yes. And the others were there as well. Well," Jiraiya corrected himself, "Yahiko was. I didn't see Nagato anywhere, but the fact that Pain possesses the Rinnegan cannot be a coincidence."
Naruto, having gone a whole minute without talking, finally burst. "He was your student, right?" Tsunade, despite, her earlier threat, ignored him. She was too busy pondering the ramifications of Jiraiya's former students being worshipped by Amegakure.
Jiraiya turned his head towards him. "And how could you possibly know that?" Suspicion was too strong a word to describe his tone. But it was close.
"He told me. While we were fighting. He called you 'Jiraiya-sensei'. That was when he said you were dead."
Jiraiya chuckled. "Well, I don't blame him for thinking that. He did tear my arm off. But I'll get there in a moment. Right now, I need to tell you both about Pain." Naruto frowned, but remained quiet.
Tsunade cut in. "Naruto has already told me a lot."
"Oh?" Jiraiya cocked his head. "What do you have so far? I'll fill in anything that's missing."
Tsunade glanced at Naruto for a moment. He took this as his cue.
"Pain isn't just one guy. He has six bodies, and they all have the same weird eyes; Itachi called it the Rinnegan. But-"
"The bodies aren't the same." Jiraiya completed the sentence.
Naruto grinned. "Right. I only really fought two of them, but they used totally different styles. One of them absorbed chakra, and the other had some sort of invisible blast, or wave. It was like… pulses, I guess. And they both used these weird black rods as weapons. They were really sharp, and cold."
"I fought one who could absorb chakra," Jiraiya confirmed. "He was shorter than the others, right? Two big spikes in his cheeks? More under his lips?"
Naruto nodded, and Jiraiya continued. "But none of the Pains I engaged had any sort of power like the second one you described. What did he look like?"
"Uh… he had three things through his nose, and two in his lips… and lots in his ears. Spiky hair, too. Kinda like mine, actually." Naruto unconsciously rubbed his head.
Jiraiya slowly closed his eyes. "I thought so," he said. Regret weighed down his words. "That was Yahiko."
"So he's Pain?" Tsunade asked.
"That," Jiraiya said, "is where is gets confusing." He paused for a moment, collecting his thoughts. "In Amegakure, I fought three of the Pains. I managed to defeat them, and I thought that was the end of it."
He gestured to his missing arm with a bitter smile. "That was how this happened. I let my guard down for a second, and another one blindsided me. Even in Sage Mode, I barely knew what hit me."
Tsunade hissed under her breath. She had only seen her teammate use that technique twice before, but she knew how incredibly dangerous a person became once they mastered natural energy.
The idea of an opponent who could catch Jiraiya completely off guard while he was utilizing it was frightening; Pain really was a dangerous threat.
Jiraiya pretended that he hadn't heard the noise; Naruto didn't understand it.
"Hey, what's Sage Mode Ero-sennin? That sounds pretty cool." Naruto allowed himself a moment of thought, and his eyes widened. "Hey wait, is that why you're called-"
"Not now, Naruto. We'll talk about it later, okay?"
Naruto kept his mouth open for a moment, and then closed it. He shrugged. "'Kay." He hadn't really expected an explanation right away. "But hey, you're definitely gonna tell me. No way Baa-chan'll let you out of the hospital right now: you're stuck here. You can't just run off."
Jiraiya smirked. "Sure. Tell yourself that, kid. Hope it makes you feel better. Maybe in-"
Tsunade's snarl silenced him, along with the intense glare. "Over my dead body will you be leaving this place anytime soon, idiot. You better get ready for a long stay."
Both Jiraiya and Naruto involuntarily shivered.
"Uh… anyway, that's when I found out that Pain had six bodies, not just the three. Definitely an unpleasant surprise. And with one arm, well…"
There was an awkward silence. Tsunade just closed her eyes and bit her lip once more, while Naruto stared at the floor, his fists clenched.
'I would have died,' hung unspoken in the air.
"So." Jiraiya said, trying to dispel the atmosphere. "One of those new bodies was the one you described, Naruto. A man who was certainly Yahiko. However," Jiraiya frowned, "when I asked if he was actually Yahiko, he only said that Yahiko had been dead for a long time."
He grinned. "Very cryptic. I'll have to put something like that in my next book."
Tsunade ignored Jiraiya's aside. "But if Yahiko is dead, then who is Pain? And how did you escape?"
Jiraiya's grin vanished. "I have a theory about Pain's true identity. All of the bodies both Naruto and I encountered shared Nagato's eyes. The Rinnegan. I don't see how someone could have fabricated five more pairs of Rinnegan without there being even rumors about such research, so it stands to reason that Nagato has, in fact, found some way of spreading the power of the Rinnegan to others."
"So Pain works for Nagato?" Tsunade said.
"No." Jiraiya shook his head. "I believe Pain is Nagato."
Seeing the looks of confusion he was receiving, Jiraiya sighed and palmed his head with his remaining head.
"Okay, listen. I believe 'Pain', as Naruto and I encountered him, is some sort of strike-force, or elite unit, that Nagato uses. They're not actually individuals. They're more like puppets. And they're not chakra constructs. In fact, I think they may be-"
"Corpses." This time, it was Naruto completing Jiraiya's sentences. He frowned at the look he got from both of the Sannin. "What?"
"What makes you think that?" Tsunade said, disgust in her voice. She had heard of human bodies being used as living puppets before, but this was on a wholly different level.
"Since when do you use the word 'corpses'?" Jiraiya said with a bemused grin.
"Hey! It's not that fancy a word! C'mon Pervy Sage, I'm not that dumb!" Naruto yelled, before realizing what he'd just said. He went red. "Shut up!"
"I didn't say anything, Naruto," Jiraiya said with the same smile, before making a gesture that clearly said 'get on with it'.
Naruto huffed, before turning to Tsunade. "I took out one of Pain's bodies right before he took out me." Jiraiya perked up at the word 'me', but Naruto continued. "It was weird: it barely bled, and its skin felt… well, gross. Like a dead body's." He shrugged. "So I mean, is it that unlikely that this Nagato guy, if he's the real Pain, uses some sorta puppet jutsu or something to control them… it… himself?" He frowned. "Man, that's confusing."
"If so…" The Hokage considered. "That would be far beyond any sort of jutsu of that nature that I've ever heard of. Even the elders of the Sand Village need to be near the puppets they're controlling. And Jiraiya, I doubt that this Nagato was following you around the whole time. You certainly would have noticed, right?"
The sage shrugged. "Almost definitely. But there's another problem."
"Oh?"
"Pain sees through all of the Rinnegan simultaneously: I confirmed that much, at least. So visually, Nagato wouldn't have to directly observe the fight. However, the issue of how he would imperceptibly channel chakra to them is still an odd one."
"Actually…" Tsunade put her hand to her chin, thinking deeply for a moment. "Hey, Naruto, you said they all used the same weapons? Black metal rods?"
"Yeah? But what's that got to-"
"Well," Tsunade said, "I know that we haven't started our investigation on the body you brought back, yet, Naruto. But I'd be willing to bet my hat that all those rods in his face aren't just for decoration."
"What do you mean, Baa-chan?" Naruto didn't see where this was going. Jiraiya did, but he kept quiet.
"Naruto, were you ever hit by one of those things? The rods?" Concentration scrunched up Tsunade's face dramatically; Jiraiya idly noted how adorable it made her nose look.
"Well, yeah, but-" Once more, Tsunade cut off Naruto's fumbling answer.
"Did it feel strange? Was there anything odd about the metal?" She was so close; she could feel it.
"Well, yeah, actually. It was really… cold. I got stabbed by one; it felt like it was filling me up with ice." The memory of the sensation made Naruto flinch. His hand unconsciously went to his stomach. It was throbbing, a ghostly pain.
Tsunade grinned. "That's it. It's those rods. Nagato must channel his chakra through them, somehow. That's how he directs Pain."
"Huh." Jiraiya sounded impressed. "I'd clap, but considering…" He shook his head, but he was smiling. "Okay. So we've figured out Pain. Doesn't really change the fact that he's still enormously dangerous, but it's something."
"Yeah. Makes that thing about Yahiko being dead for a long time make a lot more sense. Nagato must have used his body afterwards. That's… kind of messed up." Naruto looked disturbed by his own logic, as did both of the other people in the room.
"Hmm… so Nagato is definitely Pain, then. And we understand how he utilizes this bizarre puppet jutsu of his. But that doesn't explain how you managed to escape while so injured, Jiraiya. What happened after you lost your arm?" Tsunade had a look on her face somewhere between dread and dreadful curiosity. It was extremely odd.
Jiraiya took a deep breath, and told them.
Jiraiya took a deep breath, and winced. A bead of sweat ran down his jaw.
"What the hell are you!?" he shouted. Standing on the surface of the great lake that surrounded Amegakure, clutching his missing arm, with two toads fused to his shoulders, Jiraiya shouted all of his pain, confusion, heartbreak, and undeniable rage up at the six figures imperiously staring down at him.
"We are Pain, that's all." The lead body, the one that Jiraiya knew was Yahiko, narrowed his eyes, gaining a cruel aspect that Yahiko never had in life. We are God."
All six of the bodies tensed, ready to leap down upon the one-armed Sannin. Jiraiya coiled as well, preparing for a counterattack. Even with one arm, in Sage Mode he was still nothing to trifle with.
Both parties stopped cold as a bizarre sound filled the air. It sounded like a generator heating up, or water running over stones. But it was neither of those things. It was wrong, the kind of noise never meant to be produced in the natural world: high pitched and low, thrumming and monotone.
A ripple in reality formed, and a man in an Akatsuki cloak stepped out of it. He had a strange orange mask that seemed to spiral out from his right eye.
Jiraiya had no idea who he was.
"Ah," The man said in a darkly amused voice. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"
The man who was clearly Yahiko turned to face the man while the rest of Pain watched Jiraiya. The Sannin merely watched, confused. Who was this new arrival?
"Of a sorts. What is it, Madara?" The voice was no longer imperious, now it was almost deferential. Respectful. Pain was addressing the man with the clear air of a servant.
'Madara!?' Jiraiya stared. He could only think of one man with that name whom someone like Pain could possibly be subordinate to.
The implications frightened him. If Madara Uchiha was in charge of the Akatsuki, the organization may have been more dangerous than anyone had suspected.
"I need your help, Pain." It wasn't a command; not that blunt. But it certainly wasn't a request: definitely the words of a commander. "Itachi Uchiha has betrayed me."
"Really? What a shame." Pain didn't seem anything other than sincere.
"It is. I regret that it has come to this, but it can't be helped. However, I have good news as well." Now, the masked man sounded almost gloating.
"Oh?"
"I have located the Nine-Tails."
Now, all but one of the bodies had turned to face Madara. Only one watched Jiraiya. "Out of his village? How far?"
"Less than seventy miles away. And almost completely undefended. Its only escort is two jōnin and a rather uninspiring tracking team. I have no doubt you could easily defeat them, despite the distance. Unless… is that Jiraiya of the Sannin?" The masked man peered down at the Toad Sage, who glared up at him.
"It is." There was nothing in that voice.
"Ah. What a reunion that must have been. He hasn't worn you out, has he?" Madara's tone, in the other hand, was clearly calculating.
"No." There was that pride that had infected the orange-haired man's voice since the beginning; that endless confidence.
"Good. I'll take care of him, then. Keep him here for a moment, will you? I'll be right back," The man said, stepping forward and taking hold of the shoulder of the first body that Jiraiya had encountered: the summoner. With a twisted noise, they both whirled out of existence.
Yahiko turned back to Jiraiya.
The man's eyes were narrowed. Despite the blood dripping from the stump of his arm, he looked more threatening than ever. "The Kyuubi, huh? You're going after Naruto, now?"
The man cocked his head. "Ah yes. Naruto Uzumaki. He is also your student, isn't he?"
The Sannin nodded, his teeth grit.
"Well, this should be interesting, then. Two disciples of the same master battling, however brief it will be. Tell me, how is his control over the Kyuubi?"
Jiraiya didn't answer. He just launched himself upward. None of the Pain's made a move, simply standing there as he alighted on the ledge.
"He'll beat you, Pain. I believe in him. He'll do what I couldn't manage." The toads on Jiraiya's shoulder shared a glance.
The man stared at him, five sets of unblinking eyes. "Actually… I don't think he will. I will capture the Nine-Tails, and craft my weapon." He smiled grimly.
"I shall teach the world pain, and bring peace. You are lying, Jiraiya-sensei." He paused, and Yahiko stared up at the sky for a moment, an invisible signal, before refocusing on his former teacher.
"And you know it."
And before Jiraiya could respond, or fling himself forward, all of the Pains exploded in puffs of chakra-smoke, vanishing from Amegakure.
Jiraiya growled, his phantom arm throbbing. He stared forward, his remaining hand clenching.
"Jiraiya-boy, we've got to get out of here." The vivid green elder toad on Jiraiya's shoulder spoke in a strong rattling voice, his tone harsh. "This will probably be our only chance."
"I've got to get to Naruto," he murmured.
"Do you know where he is, hmm?" The other toad, this one dull purple, didn't couch her words. "I don't think so. You can't throw your life away here. I'll go back to Myōboko and prepare a reverse summoning."
"I wouldn't do that, Baa-san. If that masked guy comes back, Jiraiya-boy may need us. Jiraiya, you should summon Gamatate. We'll make sure he gets here quickly." That was the first toad again.
"You don't get it. I need to get to Naruto. I need to follow Pain." Jiraiya's voice didn't change, but he somehow still managed to sound dangerous.
"I'm afraid that won't be happening." The baritone behind him caused Jiraiya to spin about, splattering a small crescent of blood from his missing arm.
The masked man stood there, standing with his head cocked and his arms crossed. He'd appeared without a sound.
"Jiraiya of the Sannin. I'll admit, you could have been a real problem for my plans if you'd kept meddling. But now…" He shrugged. "Well, let's just say it seems you won't be."
"And what would those 'plans' be?" The white-haired man asked, invisibly tensing. Apparently, whatever transportation jutsu he was using was more versatile than it had first appeared: there had been no noise to mark his arrival this time.
The masked man chuckled. It almost made Jiraiya smile: if any chuckle could ever be described as evil, it was this one. It had been a long time since he'd gone up against someone with that certain… megalomania.
His apparent former student notwithstanding.
"Oh please. Give me some credit at least, Jiraiya. Do I really seem like the type to just explain my plans in detail to my opponents? I may as well just tell you how to defeat me." One of the man's hands came up over his mask.
"I wouldn't stop you," Jiraiya offered, chuckling along with the man.
Without any sort of warning, he sprung forward, an oversized Rasengan suddenly in his hand. The jutsu carved away the concrete in front of him, and engulfed the man in a wash of deadly chakra.
The chuckling didn't stop. Jiraiya's eyes widened as the man emerged from the back of Rasengan, his hand reaching forward. The ball of chakra cleared 'Madara' entirely, and then a gloved hand locked itself over Jiraiya's face.
He came to a sudden, and painfully jarring, stop.
"Well." The dark voice hadn't lost any of its amusement. "That was easier than I thought it would be."
A bizarre sensation covered the whole of Jiraiya's body. It felt like he was being sucked down a drain, or thrown in a washing machine. Everything twisted, and his vision began to go dark.
Fukasaku chose that moment to punch the masked man in the face.
Despite the elder toad's diminutive appearance, senjutsu was coursing through his veins, dramatically increasing his strength and durability: the tiny fist hit like a runaway train. There was a shattering sound, and the man rocketed back, reeling from the blow.
He hit a wall, and went through it. Not in an explosion of concrete; he simply passed through, like a ghost. Jiraiya was left standing stunned, shaking his head from side to side as he tried to shake off the unearthly sensation that for a moment, he'd been somewhere else.
Somewhere chilly.
"Thanks, Pops. I don't know what that jutsu was, but-"
"Nevermind about that that, you moron!" Shima's shrill voice ripped through Jiraiya's thanks. "Just get Gamatate! And then out of here! He's gonna be back!"
"Hey, don't rush him, Ma! We should find out who this guy is first. If that's all he's got, then-"
Fukasaku was interrupted by a truly ridiculous amount of unusually hot fire detonating the wall that the masked man had passed through, showering the spot where Jiraiya had been standing with molten chunks of concrete and smatterings of superheated rebar.
Fortunately, he wasn't standing there anymore: the moment the wall had begun to deform, the Toad Sannin had dived to the left, off of the narrow ledge he and the man had been standing on, falling towards Amegakure's great lake.
Jiraiya landed, sinking minutely into the water to reduce the impact, before straightening up.
He heard someone behind him cough.
Jiraiya spun, and found the masked man coolly regarding him amidst a considerable amount of rubble, as well as two enormous brass pipes, both twisted out of shape. His spiraling mask, once immaculate, was now covered in cracks: chunks had fallen away from the left side, revealing another glaring Sharingan.
Jiraiya wondered why he had hidden away the second Sharingan.
"That," the man said conversationally, "was inconvenient. So those frogs aren't just decoration, then?"
"WHO YOU CALLING A FROG?!" Shima shrieked, and Jiraiya flinched.
"And they talk too. Wonderful. I have always wanted more screeching amphibians in my day."
If he hadn't known that it would have gotten him punched by two irate elders, than Jiraiya would probably have been laughing, despite the seriousness of the situation. So instead he suppressed the laughter, and tried to get some answers instead.
"Who are you?" he called, bringing his arm up in a defensive stance.
"Haven't you figured it out?" the man said. "You are Jiraiya, Konoha's most efficient spy. Surely the information you have is more than enough?"
Jiraiya shrugged, the toads on his shoulders bobbing with the motion. "Perhaps. But I'd prefer you to confirm my suspicions."
"Which are?"
The Sannin sighed. "That you are Madara Uchiha."
The man stared at him, both of his Sharingan spinning. "You are correct. I am Madara Uchiha."
"Well, you see, that's where I'm a little uncertain." Jiraiya grinned. The man had wandered into his trap.
The man stiffened. "What do you mean?"
"Well," Jiraiya said, "Madara was one of the deadliest shinobi the world has ever seen. And he took that title for two reasons: the first was his ruthlessness, and the second was his unstoppable Sharingan. Now, don't get me wrong, that intangibility you used was certainly tricky, but it's not really his style, you know? If I was going up against him, he probably would have smashed me with something big and flashy by now."
"Well, I am quite old now. Perhaps I've just shifted my focus to not getting hit," the man said, his eyes narrowing.
"Maybe." Jiraiya sounded unconvinced. "Or maybe you're just trying to cash in on a famous name to lend yourself a bit more credibility. Just who did you take those eyes from?"
"I assure you, these are my eyes." The man sounded dully furious.
"Really?" The Toad Sage's voice was more skeptical than one of Tsunade's debt collectors learning that the Legendary Sucker had the funds to pay. "Show me something impressive then, 'Madara'."
The man reached to his side and wrenched a jagged piece of rebar from the ruins that surrounded him, his grip imprinting his hand in the metal. "Against you? An old man with one arm? Don't make me laugh."
"Well, if you are who you say you are, you can hardly call me old, 'Madara'." Jiraiya smiled. "C'mon then. Let me show just what this 'old man' can do."
The masked man charged, his Sharingan spinning rapidly. Jiraiya shifted slightly, sliding one foot back, and then threw a low punch, aiming for the man's gut.
The clenched fist slid through the man's chest entirely, exiting from the top of his head. 'Madara' continued forward, moving through the Sannin. Jiraiya followed his fist into the air, breaking contact with the water. When the man finally finished passing through the sage, Jiraiya threw a kick backwards.
It passed through the cloaked man's shoulder, and a gloved hand came up towards the foot. A moment later, the foot came clear and the hand grasped it, making solid contact. Once more, the sage felt that strange somewhere else sensation, and the world twisted.
The masked man hn'd, confident in his victory. The toads couldn't reach him from this angle.
Jiraiya grinned.
A shadow clone burst from beneath the water, its fist aimed for the man's groin.
The hand holding Jiraiya's foot suddenly lost its solidness, and the shadow clone sped up through the man's body, making contact the whole way. Meanwhile, the real Jiraiya landed with barely a ripple, the strange sensation gone. He leapt backwards, landing about twenty feet away.
The masked man spun back and stabbed the shadow clone in the lower back with the sharpened piece of rebar he had grabbed, dispelling it in a puff of smoke.
"Thought so. You can't be intangible and use that sucking thing at the same time." Jiraiya gave an evil grin. "Not impressed, 'Madara'."
The man stared. "You," he bit out, "are far too annoying for your own good."
Jiraiya guffawed. "Well how did you think I survived this long?" he laughed.
Then he staggered, his vision shaking.
'What?'
"You moron," one of the toads on his shoulder hissed. He looked over to where his left arm should have been. It was no longer dripping blood.
That wasn't good.
The man in the mask, who definitely wasn't Madara Uchiha, watched attentively.
"You're weakened," he surmised. "Certainly not as unaffected by the battle with Pain as you've been trying to seem. This will be over soon."
Jiraiya snapped his head up, snarling. "Don't count on it."
He made to charge forward, gathering natural chakra for a crushing blow.
Fukasaku slapped him. Hard.
"What the hell are you doing, Jiraiya?" No honorific; no pet name. The elder toad sounded pissed.
Jiraiya looked over, shocked. This allowed Shima to slap him as well, even harder. "Why are you still here, moron?!"
"Whuh?" Jiraiya couldn't understand what was going on. Why wouldn't he be here? Madara Uchiha was right there! This might be his only chance to-
Wait.
Wait.
That wasn't Madara Uchiha. And… and Naruto… Pain was after Naruto! He had to… oh god, why was he still here?
The world sharpened, a blur that Jiraiya hadn't even noticed vanishing, and the masked man cocked his head. "Ah. You've broken the genjutsu. That's a shame."
"What did you do to me?" Jiraiya croaked. Everything felt weaker: his legs were trembling.
"Oh, hardly anything. I just assisted you a little, that's all."
"What?" Jiraiya staggered again, trying to keep his feet. The formerly defined world was starting to blur again. His limbs felt like they were made of lead; it was difficult to focus enough chakra to his feet to stay on the surface of the lake.
"Helped you along. Took your existing anger, and magnified it. Took your adrenal rush, and used it to banish your pain. Took your pride, the delusions of glory you felt at the idea of defeating Madara Uchiha, and blinded you with it. I had hoped you would simply fight until you dropped, but…" The Uchiha imposter shrugged.
"Bastard," Jiraiya hissed. He could feel it: despite the effects of Sage Mode, blood loss and shock were finally getting to him. Everything seemed sluggish.
'Madara' didn't respond. He just charged again, his rebar pole held before him like a lance.
Jiraiya tried to leap away, slowed by his failing body.
He wasn't fast enough. The pole punched through the meat of his thigh, scraping off the bone, and more blood splashed into the water.
He grunted, sounding more annoyed than pained, and kicked towards 'Madara's' head, tearing the pole from the masked man's hand. His foot went straight through, the man not even bothering to duck.
Jiraiya spun and landed, trying to keep his distance. His newly impaled leg impaired him: he staggered across the water, barely keeping his feet. 'Madara' slowly followed him, looking for an opening.
The man's hands sped through a simple set of signs, one that Jiraiya had seen dozens if not hundreds of times before. He knew what was coming next. For a second, his hand drifted to the pouch on his lower back, and his eyes widened as he felt a familiar weight there.
He'd almost forgotten about that scroll. A plan began to form in the Sannin's mind.
"Shima," he muttered, his voice low. The purple elder looked at him, concern clear in his eyes, and he rapped the scroll twice.
For a moment, the toad's eyes widened, before her mouth became a severe line. She nodded.
The masked man observed the moment of communication, and brought one of his hands up to where his lips would be.
"Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu." 'Madara' sounded almost bored.
The enormous ball of fire, spitting superheated chakra in every direction, certainly wasn't. It seemed almost unformed, rough. Jiraiya distantly wondered if it was because the man's mouth was obscured.
The fireball roared over Jiraiya, flash frying him in a wash of shaped chakra and boiling steam. The toads on his shoulders popped, the intense heat and pressure destroying them in an instant.
The masked man watched, his head cocked, his eyes focusing. He paused for a moment, and then turned slowly, following something only he could see. His eye fell on a piece of inconspicuous rubble.
The rubble exploded in a puff of smoke. Jiraiya burst from the white cloud, his leg leaving a trail of blood across the water. It was clear he hadn't entirely cleared the fireball: his long white hair was scorched, and his forearm was smoking.
'Madara' began to slowly walk forward: his opponent was reaching the point of exhaustion, if such a messy kawarimi was all he could do. The next few seconds would decide the battle.
The Sannin turned and watched the man's approach, careful not to look into his eyes again. He reached down and pulled the rebar from his leg, wincing. More blood spurted across the lake's surface.
"Jiraiya!" Shima yelled.
'Madara' leapt forward, both hands extended. Jiraiya threw the rebar forward and dove down, underneath the water. The metal pole passed through the masked man and he landed where Jiraiya had been a moment before, both of his Sharingan scanning the murky water.
A moment later, he found what he was looking for. He jumped once more, thrusting his hand below the water.
Tobi dragged Jiraiya up by the throat. Water and blood dripped from the man, and he looked extremely groggy.
"Bastard," he hissed again, and 'Madara' invisibly smirked.
"So I finally have you. I'll admit, I'm disappointed, Jiraiya."
Jiraiya glared at the masked man, his eyes foggy. "Naruto will stop you."
The man just laughed. "I doubt that. I imagine Pain is capturing him even now. It's over: after this, I'll send someone to claim the Hachibi and Rokubi, and this business will come to a close. Perhaps Sasuke? If Pain does bring him back, he would be the perfect catspaw."
He refocused on Jiraiya, watching as the man feebly squirmed. "No matter. It's time I ended this." Then, he noticed something.
"Where are the toads?"
The next moment seemed a minute long.
A white scroll interposed itself over Tobi's vision. It was plain, without ornamentation, with red frill on the sides. A tiny purple hand clutched one edge. There was a single symbol on it, surrounded by a ring.
Four lines. One long one, running in a slash from the top of the circle to the bottom. Another, branching off from the first about halfway down, forming something like an upside down Y. And two smaller dashes of ink, like commas, on either side of the top of the first slash.
Kanji. 'Fire'.
"Here. A gift from Itachi." Tobi heard Jiraiya's voice. It was no longer weary. Now, it was sharp: an unsheathed sword.
He attempted to use kamui.
He was too slow.
"Burn."
The world went an awful, flickering black.
Tobi screamed.
He staggered back, releasing his hold on Jiraiya and allowing the Sannin to drop to the water. Distantly, he heard the puff of a summoning jutsu, but the sound didn't truly register in his mind.
He was much more focused on the feeling of his face melting.
He had thought that half of his body being crushed beneath unforgiving stone was the worst pain he would feel in his life. The pressure… his ribs snapping, his organs popping and being pushed to the side, one of his lungs unable to take air in, every breath feeling like another suffocation… he had been convinced, in the months it had taken for him to recover, that he would never feel another pain like that in his life.
He'd been proven dead wrong when he'd watched Kakashi put his lightning sheathed hand through Rin's chest. And now…
The Amaterasu was in his eyes. He could feel it. They were boiling away. The rest of his head was faring no better. He was already blind: the Sharingan was tough, but this was Amaterasu.
Only one possible thing to do: any other action would lead to his death.
'Izanagi!'
The world went grey, and then snapped.
He found himself standing thirty feet away from Jiraiya, where he had been before charging the man with his rebar pole. Half of his vision inexorably turned dark: he could feel his left eye closing, his control over it gone.
The Toad Sage blinked. "Huh. Didn't see that coming."
'Madara' shook his head. The phantom sensation of his eyes melting stayed with him. He settled for glaring at Jiraiya, wishing that his remaining eye was capable of casting the Amaterasu so he could pay the man back a hundred-fold.
The man ignored the hateful look, and just shrugged in response. "As much as I want to know how the hell you did that, I've already wasted far too much time here." He panted, out of breath even from just a short sentence.
Tobi snarled. "You-"
Jiraiya gave a flippant gesture with his remaining hand. "See ya."
A small toad, plain and green, jumped from beneath the water, its mouth impossibly wide, and swallowed the man whole. Its momentum carried it slightly into the air, and then it vanished in a puff of smoke as it hit the water.
The man in the mask stared at the empty patch of lake for a moment dull, fury steadily growing in his throat.
Then he turned, and began to stagger back towards the ominous skyline of Amegakure.
"From there, Gamatate took me to the gates of Konoha." Jiraiya gave a wry smile. "At that point, I'd already lost a lot of blood. Wasn't thinking straight. It seemed like a good idea to freak out the guys on duty at the time."
Tsunade stared. "That's quite the story, Jiraiya."
"I'll say!" Naruto, as usual, was quite enthusiastic. "You actually managed to hurt that weird mask guy, Pervy Sage? I couldn't even touch him!"
Jiraiya shrugged, trying and failing to look humble. "Oh, it was mostly luck. I was just lucky that I had the stasis scroll containing Itachi's Amaterasu on me."
"That does remind me," Tsunade said, rather sternly. "Why did you have that scroll on you?"
"Ah…" Jiraiya scratched his leg, wincing. "Well, you never know when something like a couple meters of Amaterasu will come in handy. I didn't think I'd end up using it on someone, though; or as a distraction to get away." He shrugged again. "But hey, it worked."
Tsunade palmed her face. "I'd prefer you tell me when you bring something that dangerous into the village Jiraiya, sealed or not."
"Sorry hime," Jiraiya said, clearly unapologetic.
"Nevermind that, though. So, this masked man-"
"Tobi." Naruto suddenly said. Both of the Sannin looked at him. "Uh, I mean, that's his name. Tobi. Or at least that's what he called himself."
Tsunade clicked her tongue. "So this 'Tobi'… he claims to be Madara Uchiha?" Jiraiya nodded, and she continued. "And you're fairly sure he's not?"
"Well, he could be." Jiraiya said. "But I managed to get away from him with one arm, while going into shock, and did some serious damage in the bargain. So even if he is Madara, which I doubt, he's not nearly as powerful as the Madara Uchiha that went toe to toe with Hashirama all those years ago."
Tsunade nodded, a thoughtful expression on her face.
"I wonder who it could be, then. He claimed to be an Uchiha. If there are any that are unaccounted for…" She shrugged. "Well, we might be able to find someone who went missing in the last few years before the clan died. Doesn't really matter, though. We should focus more on the existing threat."
There was a moment of silence.
"What's their next move, you think?" Naruto asked. "Akatsuki, I mean. They didn't catch me, and I think Itachi hurt Pain pretty bad. So what're they doing next?"
"I don't know. Not right now, at least." Jiraiya turned to his student.
"Listen, Naruto. I need you to leave for a couple minutes, okay? Go visit your friends: I'm sure they're a couple you haven't seen yet, right?"
Naruto just looked confused. "Well, yeah but…" Realization slowly dawned on him. "Hey! You're not trying to get out of explaining what Sage Mode is to me, right? Ero-sennin, you swore!"
Jiraiya chuckled. "No, it's not that, Naruto. Tsunade and I just need to discuss something. Come back in like half an hour, and I'll give you all the answers you could ever want. Just get out of my hair for a minute, will you?"
Naruto shivered. He'd seen what Jiraiya could do with his hair. After a moment of consideration, he scrunched up his face. "Fine." He said. "But I'm holding you to that, Pervy Sage! When I get back-"
"Yeah, yeah, I shall reveal the incredible secrets of Sage Mode to you. Now, get out of here." Jiraiya waved him off.
Naruto harrumphed, and strode out of the room, internally sighing.
Now he didn't have any sort of excuse not to visit Hinata.
He took a deep breath, and took off down the hospital's corridors, heading for her room.
The Sannin watched him go, both noticing the invisible straitening of his spine. Tsunade wondered what it was about.
Jiraiya just grinned. He knew that tiny movement.
The void that Naruto left behind wasn't filled. Not immediately. For the moment, there was silence.
Jiraiya lay back, relaxing with a groan. Talking for so long had left him a little out of breath. His leg had begun to ache again, joining his missing arm.
Tsunade turned to look at him, her brow furrowed. She made as if to speak, before closing her mouth again.
Jiraiya simply waited.
"I thought that it was the last time," she finally managed to say.
"What was the last time?" Jiraiya said, looking out the window at the sunlit village.
"When… when you walked away. When you said goodbye. I thought… I really thought that it was your last goodbye." Tsunade's voice nearly cracked on the final word, before she managed to reassert her iron authority over it.
Jiraiya turned to look at her. "I came back, though." He sounded nothing but patient.
"I know that!" Tsunade snapped. "But Jiraiya, I couldn't… you just went off into the sunset, like some stupid character in one of your books, and all I could do was sit there and watch! I knew, knew, that you wouldn't come back. I don't know how. And I…"
She looked away from him suddenly, her hair whipped by the violent motion. "I couldn't do anything. I just let you go! Off on your next adventure, like any other time!"
She bit her lip again. Her fists clenched at her sides. "I hated it. I hated myself. I swore, after Naruto brought me back that I wouldn't be that helpless ever again, like I was with Dan. And then I just let you-" She cut herself off abruptly, looking terrified.
Jiraiya stared at her as her voice choked, and she blinked heavily, shaking. Her shoulders trembled.
His remaining hand came up, beckoning.
"Hime, come here." His voice was soft. Tsunade slowly walked to his side, barely managing to stay on her feet.
She reached his bed, and his hand sought out hers, gently taking it. Running his fingers over her palm, he reached up and took hold of her forearm, drawing her down. Tsunade stared at him, unresisting.
As she drew closer, Jiraiya's hand came up, caressing her chin and moving around the side of her neck. His hand came to rest there, the rough, warm palm against her neck. His thumb sat in the indentation right below her earlobe. She shivered.
Their faces were close now, only about a foot apart. Tsunade was transfixed. Jiraiya stared directly into her eyes, and spoke.
"Tsunade. I swear: I won't leave you again." His voice managed to sound both solemnly serious, and wryly humorous.
"That was my last goodbye."
Tsunade gazed at him for a moment, her throat constricted. After a second, her head dropped, and she tried to chuckle. It barely managed to escape.
"You know…" she choked out, "I swore that if you came back, I wouldn't let you keep your cool anymore."
Jiraiya chuckled. "Seems I can't help it. But it's me, the Gallant Jiraiya. What did you expect?"
This time, Tsunade did laugh. She bent forward, pulling her teammate into a close hug. Jiraiya's arm wrapped around her neck, securing her there.
They remained like that for a long time. Finally, Tsunade pulled back.
"So," she said, blinking away an errant tear, "what do we do now?"
Jiraiya grinned. "Oh, I have a couple ideas."
Tsunade looked at him in something like disbelief for a second, her lips twitching. He quirked an eyebrow.
The Hokage threw back her head, let out a real laugh again, and a dozen years fell from her face with it.
AN: Obvious nightmare is obvious. Hopefully, still disturbing though.
(By the way: I feel I should clarify. That first scene is not Itachi's doing, or some lingering effect of the Tsukuyomi. That was all Sasuke's imagination/fevered dreams: I was trying to do my best to clarify his mental state without, you know, waking him up.)
This chapter was not fun to write, mostly because I had to watch Jiraiya's death two or three times in a row to get the setting and dialogue right. Which made me sad. Really, really sad, particularly since I had to write a scene with him and Tsunade right after.
At the same time, this chapter was really fun to write, because I got to catch Tobi's face on fire. And in a bizarre sort of symmetry, it was still Itachi's fault.
Anyway, I hoped you enjoyed it. Remember: follow if you want to keep reading, favorite if you want others to as well, and please, leave a review telling me what you thought. I can't tell you how happy that little email alert makes me.
Serendipity, out.