AMOC: Chapter 7: The Lies We Tell Ourselves
"A lie that is half-truth is the darkest of all lies."
― Alfred Tennyson
JPOV:
"Where do you think you are going to put your things?" Bella asked.
Making my way past her I went up the stairs and straight to her room.
Bella stomped up the stairs behind me.
"You are not going in my room." She cried out.
Sitting my luggage down at the foot of her bed I glanced around the meager size room.
"Good lord when was the last time this room saw a fresh coat of paint?"
"Why do you care? You aren't staying in here with me." Bella declared, placing her hands firmly on her hips.
"Honey, a husband sleeps in the same room as his wife."
Bella's mouth dropped open while her eyes bugged out.
"Nooooo...we didn't agree to that."
"I'm not going to sleep on the couch Bella. If we are going to play our parts then it would make sense for us to share a room."
"Jake, look around you. Does this room look big enough for the both of us?"
Bella was growing irritated with me, her pale cheeks were turning a raspberry shade of pink.
"Then I guess we will need to look for a bigger house. I told you already that I have plenty of stuff to fill up a house of my own. I'm not going to put it in storage for a few years while we remain married. It would be expensive and a waste of good furniture."
"Jake I don't want to move out of my house."
"I don't see any other way for this to work unless you are warming up to the idea of us sleeping in this...well cozy bed." I smiled seductively at her.
"NOOO! No way!" Bella shook her head while covering her face with her hands.
"Then lets go house hunting."
"Jake, we haven't even sent out the invitations and I still have to purchase a dress. House hunting will takes us weeks."
"I've already found a house I like. You and Charlotte could go with me today to take a quick look at it. The realtor is a nice lady who is willing to show it to us in an hour if you are willing."
Bella rolled her eyes and stomped her foot while she took a few minutes to think over my offer.
"Okay, if I go look at this house and I don't like it then are you willing to wait until after we are married to look further?" She asked.
"Sounds reasonable but keep in mind that every night that we haven't purchased a house means I will be sleeping right here." I patted the bed and gave her a look that warned her that I was going to enjoy our closeness in the small bed.
"Your an ass." Bella threw her arms up in defeat.
A hour later we were on our way to meet Mrs. Newton to see the house that I was going to buy no matter what Bella thought about it. This house was just one part of my revenge against the only woman who ever had the chance to shred my heart into million pieces. My painful break up with Lauren taught me many things, the most important of them was to never trust your heart to a woman who seems too good to be true.
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Mrs. Newton showed us around the house with great enthusiasm. Bella was quiet during the tour while Charlotte skipped and clapped happily at the enormity of the house. When they made their way to the back yard her enthusiasm intensified.
A secure fence outlined a large area of the backyard where a swing set was placed in the center of it, along with an area that once held a beautiful garden. Looking over at Bella, I saw her eyes widen with delight. Although trying to read her facial expressions was like staring at a blank page, her eyes revealed the excitement she was trying to contain from me and Mrs. Newton. There was no doubt in my mind that she was trying to think of an excuse why this house wasn't right for her and Charlotte.
There wasn't one reasonable complaint and we both knew it.
"So what do you think about it? I mean it could use some repairs here and there but overall the size is perfect for a couple starting out. You have plenty of room for a growing family." Mrs. Newton's eyes wavered curiously over Bella's flatten stomach.
With a smirk on my face I watched as Bella flinched at the idea of bearing my children.
"We are in no hurry for any additions. Charlotte keeps us plenty busy." I glanced over at Charlotte and smiled happily at her.
"Oh. Well, it has great potential. I almost forgot there is a stable on the property, as well as a garage apartment over the four car garage."
Bella sucked in her breath and her eyes hesitantly turned in my direction.
"Do we really need all this room?" She croaked.
"I would rather have too much than not enough."
"I don't know." Bella chewed on the corner of her lip.
"I will give you two a few minutes to think it over." Mrs. Newton smiled pleasantly at the both of us before leaving to allow us a private conversation.
"Mommy I love it." Charlotte giggled as she jump up and down the first two steps of the staircase.
"I bet you do." Bella chuckled but there was no humor in her voice.
"What's not to like about it?"
"Umm...well would you want to clean this every day? Then there is the price to consider. It's going to cost you a fortune, not to mention the time it will take to do the repairs. It's a lot to take on for someone who hasn't ever own their own home. Don't' get me started on the time it will take to do the yard work." Bella sighed heavily.
"Bella we can handle this. Tell me what you like about it."
"I like...ummm...the kitchen is nice and pretty much updated." Bella's lips curled up in a smile.
"What else?"
"The rooms are spacious." She chewed on her lip again and I knew she was imagining all the possibilities of how to make this house feel like a real home for her and Charlotte.
"Just think you won't have to sleep in my bed."
I hoped that was enough to get a quick agreement out of her but instead she rolled her eyes at me and then slowly made a spin in the room as her eyes took in everything.
"Look, once we get our divorce you can move back into your cozy little house. I like this Bella. It fits me."
"I ...can see how you would want this."
I didn't hear flattery in her words but more of a condescending tone.
"Mrs. Newton is waiting on an answer from us. We can sign the papers today and by the time we are married we can have our things moved in here. It will show the rest of the world that we are moving forward with our lives. It will be expected of us to buy a bigger home. The rest of the world will think that we plan to have a child of our own someday."
"Why?" Bella gulped hard.
"Honey, look at me. Look at you. We are two healthy young people who will no doubt be deliriously in love that we won't be able to keep our hands off of one another." I laughed whole heartedly as she shook her head and walked past me to grab Charlotte who was about to stick her head through the bannister.
"If I'm lucky then we will barely see one another in this house. I might have to put a rope with a bell on Charlotte's neck so I can find her." Bella chuckled rudely.
"Charlotte don't put your head in here. It will get stuck and we will have to call someone to come and cut it out." Bella warned her.
"My head?" Charlotte grabbed her head and let out a loud shriek.
"No honey, they will have to cut the wood so that we can release your head from this."
Bella and I both laughed at her terrified out burst.
"I won't do that." Charlotte took a few steps back and looked terrified.
"Charlotte do you remember when I told you that I was going to married Jake?"
Charlotte nodded her blond head and look at me with a crooked smile.
"Jake thinks it would be nice if we move here for awhile. Would you like that?" Bella knelt down in front of her daughter as she spoke in a motherly tone.
"This house. Not our house?" Charlotte frowned at her mother.
"Yes, this house. Jake is going to help us fix it up so we can have more room than our other house."
Charlotte looked at me with a stern look before a smile formed on her face.
"Can I swing everyday?"
"You sure can hon." I smiled back at her.
"I like it. I want it." Charlotte clapped her hands eagerly while Bella looked less enthused about the change.
"Okay." Bella exhaled loudly.
Happiness coursed through me like fireworks on the fourth of July. Sweeping Charlotte up in my arms I swung her around the room before taking Bella's hand to lead them outside.
"We have a deal." I announced proudly to Mrs. Newton who looked happier than me.
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BPOV:
I was feeling pissy when I discovered that Jake encouraged Mrs. Newton to write up the paperwork prior to us seeing the house. He was awful confident in her salesmanship he explained at the Realtor's office. He wanted this house and nothing I said was going to change his mind about it. I was starting to see a pattern with him. He was used to having everything his way and eventually I was going to have to put a stop to it.
"Let's go grab a bite. After all we should be celebrating." Jake exclaimed while taking Charlotte's hand in his while I did the same on the other side of her.
"Can we make it a quick lunch? I have to meet Alice at three for dresses."
"Sure."
Jake and Charlotte made the decision to eat at the old diner where they both agreed they had the best burgers in the whole wide world. A faint memory of me spending meals with my father washed over me unexpectedly as we sat in a corner booth.
"Are you okay?" Jake looked over Charlotte's head at me.
"Yeah. Just...nothing." I shook my head, not in the mood to share my thoughts with the man who earlier blackmailed me into buying a house ten times the size I needed.
"Can I have a milkshake?" Charlotte asked as she crawled up on her knees between us.
"You sure can." Jake agreed easily.
"Only if you eat your meal first." I warned her.
Jake and her both gave me a look that made me feel like I was somehow being a joy kill when they were both in such good spirits.
"Whatever!" I sighed and leaned back against the worn out cushions. Closing my eyes I struggled with memories from my past. Dad and I often dined here and I couldn't help but think of him each time I walked in. Opening my eyes as I shoved my sadness away I saw something that also belonged in my past but just wouldn't go away.
"Would you like your usual Bella?" Racquel asked as she took out her pad and wrote down whatever it was that Jake and Charlotte already ordered.
My eyes were glued on the man who was unaware that I was in the same room with him and what looked like his latest conquest as they made their way to the opposite side of the room.
"Uh? Yeah."
Jake was showing Charlotte a trick with the spoon and his nose while I tried to steady my erratic heartbeat.
What would happen when Edward noticed us here? Would he even acknowledge us? Or worse would he make a terrible scene and upset Charlotte's happy moment? Although our daughter met her father a few times they never spent any quality time together. She knew he was her biological father but there was no bond between them. The word "father" was like any other name one would call someone. I was half tempted to teach her to call him Edward just to piss off his family but knew no good would come that.
"Look Mommy. I can do it." Charlotte exclaimed.
Feeling her small hand patting mine took my attention away from the horrid site of the man who once swore I was the love of his life. Turning to give her my full attention I saw Jake's wide grin start to fade away as he saw what held my attention.
"Don't." My voice was soft but stern.
"What?" Jake gulped hard as his eyes burned with a fire that made me suck in my stomach as my heart pumped excessively.
"You can do it too Mommy." Charlotte handed me a spoon.
Trying to keep the possible conflict at bay I took the spoon and gave it a shot but of course it fell to the table.
"You have to lick it." Charlotte scolded me and took it upon herself to do it and then stick it on my nose.
"Ew."
Jake and Charlotte laughed as I quickly took the spoon off of my nose.
"You scared of germs?"
Jake teased but I could still see the embers of hatred in his eyes despite the smile he portrayed for me and Charlotte.
"Here you guys go." Racquel brought out our drink orders.
"Mmm...goood." Charlotte quickly begun to suck on the milk shake.
"You better slow down or you won't have any room for lunch." I playfully poke her tummy.
"I have a big tummy." Charlotte argued as she continued to gulped it down.
"Your mom's right. Slow down." Jake warned her.
"Finally you agree with me on something." I rolled my eyes playfully at them.
"I can hire a mover tomorrow to help you pack up some things. I called a friend of mine who is already in the process of boxing up my belongings." Jake stated.
Hearing him talk about us officially starting the process of moving made me feel sick to my stomach. The house he deemed too small held so many special memories for me. Leaving them behind reminded me of how I felt when I walked away from my father's grave after his funeral. It was a surreal moment and although I knew Jake was right about how it would look, a small part of me was growing weary with all the changes I was being forced to make in my life. Charlotte was worth walking through hell's fires and back but it was still all unsettling and happening with lightning speed that I wondered if my life would ever go back to any form of normalcy.
"Do you plan on going back to settle any business dealings?"
Jake quitting his job left me wondering what he planned to do while he remained in Forks with us. I knew he wasn't the lazy type and no amount of money would ever be enough for a man like him. He wouldn't squander his inheritance. We didn't know really know much about one another but the air of confidence he carried led me to believe he wasn't afraid to work for a living. Pride. Jake definitely had plenty of it. He wouldn't dare let people think he was some lazy rich kid.
His family didn't speak about him much in the years that I returned to Forks. However, the one good thing I was privy to was how he turn out to be a hard worker. Rachel once shared how she was jealous at how her brother worked throughout High School and even college so that he could have a say so in his life. She and Becca were always at the mercy of their father because they loathe the idea of seeking employment.
"Eventually. After our wedding." Jake shrugged his shoulders casually.
"Will you miss it? Your old life and friends?" I asked curiously.
Jake didn't speak much about the life he worked so hard to accomplish. A man like Jake probably had dozens of friends who would be shocked to learn that a bachelor such as himself suddenly married a woman they never heard of before.
"Yes and no. I like the city life. There is so much to do and see. I enjoyed the exploration of having a life outside of this town. However, there were moments when I missed the quietness of a place like this." He replied.
"I just hope you don't get too bored with us little people." I joked but Jake didn't seem to enjoy it.
"I'm quite aware of where I come from Bella. I'm not ashamed of it."
Lowering my eyes I was about to apologize to him if I sounded obnoxious but Racquel came to our table with our food. Charlotte and Jake quickly started eating their meals while I picked at my own. My stomach was in a constant flutter that I feared I might get sick. The whole day had me on pins and needles. Taking a drink of my soda I was hoping that perhaps we might miss any interaction with Edward when my wishful thinking was squashed like a bug.
"I thought it was you." Edward stood in front of us wearing a look on his face that made me regret getting out of bed and starting this crazy day.
"Whom are you speaking to?" Jake asked. His arm snaked behind Charlotte as his hand grip my shoulder to hold me firmly in place.
I couldn't move if I tried. Saying a silent prayer I hoped that whatever animosity these two held for one another didn't startle Charlotte.
"Dad." Charlotte drop her fry as her eyes grew as large as saucers and a smile a mile wide formed on her face.
"Charlotte." Edward's tone wasn't pleasant nor was it rude. He spoke to his daughter like he would any old acquaintance he came across on a busy street.
"Jacob Black." Edward's lip curled up as he gave Jake a nasty look.
Jake smiled at him as he remained silent to Edward's greeting.
" I heard a rumor you were passing through town and to my dismay I get up this morning to find a wedding invitation in my mailbox. I must say you do move fast Jake." Edward's eyes turned toward me and the loathing in them made my nausea double.
"I'm not passing through town, Edward. I plan to stay right here with my future wife and daughter."
Jake emphasized "daughter" and I saw the Edward flinch as his eyes bore into mine. The cold depth of his hatred was so obvious that I felt myself wishing a hole to another dimension would suddenly open up and suck me in it.
"You gotta be kidding me. What are you up to now?" Edward kept his gaze straight at me, ignoring Jake for the moment.
"I..I'm..." I shook.
My mouth was open but I couldn't articulate a sensible word.
"She isn't up to anything. Bella and I go way back. Our father's were close friends. We were lucky enough to reconnect and now we plan to take the next step in our relationship." Jake smiled.
I glanced cautiously at Jake and saw that his hatred for Edward nearly matched my own. If I looked closed enough I would have to say perhaps it ran much deeper.
"This is insane. Bella doesn't date guys like you." Edward scoffed.
"Guys like me? What am I exactly?" Jake scooted out of the booth. Before I could blink he was standing face to face with Edward.
Grabbing Charlotte I pulled her closer to me as I watched the two of them growing close to blows.
I couldn't let Charlotte witness her father and future step father fighting like this. It wasn't healthy nor was it productive. No matter how many times they hit one another neither of them would grow any wiser from his fruitless transaction.
"Racquel can I get a to go box." I called out frantically.
Racquel heard the distress in my voice and raced over to our table as I placed the remainder of Charlotte's food in it.
"You know exactly what you are. You think that by going to college and getting a fancy job in Seattle changes who you really are. Please. You will always be that Indian boy who lives on the rez trying to better himself by mingling in with people far superior to him."
"Edward!" I shouted furiously. Charlotte began to tremble at my side as she witness the dark side of her father. Over the past three years I always managed to protect her from seeing just how cruel he naturally was.
"You think you are superior to me? I see nothing has changed on your side." Jake's fists curled up by his side.
"It's just like you to pick up my sloppy seconds." Edward glanced over at me which was a huge mistake because when he turned back to Jake, his face slammed into Jake's fist.
Blood splattered on his fancy shirt and tie as Jake hit his nose with such a force I swore I heard it break.
Charlotte turn her head into my chest as a loud sob erupted from her. Although Edward deserved to be hit, Charlotte didn't deserve to watch.
"Come on honey."
Grabbing my daughter into my arms I rushed past them. If they wanted to fight it out like two adolescent teenagers then they could go at it but I wasn't about to sit there and endure it. This was not only embarrassing but it was also just another thing Edward would use against us in court.
I took off toward Alice's shop like I was on fire. I ignored Jake calling out my name. Today was going from bad to worse and I needed a stiff drink and a good friend. In this moment I was starting to really regret signing the damn marriage contract that was turning my life from horrible to utterly a disaster zone.
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