Chapter 14

"I knew this was a bad idea! Dammit! Don't use it again!"

I snorted, sinking deeper into the warm bath water. The temptation to close my eyes and let the steam from the tub lull me to sleep was strong, but I knew I would have horrifying visions if I fell asleep. There was a possibility that I would drown in my sleep, but I that would make me paranoid if I thought about that.

My eyes fluttered despite my reluctance to sleep. The bathroom door flew open and I jumped, covering myself with a wash cloth. Feliciano had a bright smile on his face, and just a towel around his waist.

"I'm going to take a bath, too!"

I dissented with, "I am in the tub right now!"

"Then make room!" He dropped the towel and scrambled over the rim.

I clenched my jaw and pressed against the closest wall. The bathtub could fit three people if they tried, so as long as they mind their personal space. Something my friend needed a lesson in.

"Kiku! Kiku!" Feliciano cheered, his high voice smashing bricks into my skull. "The water is nice and warm. Do you want me to turn on the jets?"

"No," I grumbled, squeezing my eyes shut.

It was silent besides our breathing until he asked, "Are you all right?"

I glared at him. "What makes you ask that? Do I not look all right?"

He wiggled around in the water. "Every time you go to bed, you cry out in your sleep. You don't eat anymore, and sometimes you act like you are in pain!"

That is because I am in pain. I sighed, "I am not as young as I used to be. Besides, the journey from Japan was exhausting. I should be better soon."

Feliciano did not seem assured. His mouth pulled down as he dunked a wash cloth into the water, and pulled it back out. We both stared at the water dripping off of it and back into the tub. He suddenly announced, "I'm worried about Ludwig."

He was always worrying about Ludwig. "What for?"

My friend dropped the wash rag and shifted around. "He has been working a lot, and I have not talked to him for a while."

I straightened up, trying to politely be attentive. "Is he mad at you?"

"I don't think so. He seems to be in a good mood, but just tired."

I nodded. Ever since I decided to cancel our outing and stay inside, his boss probably does not even know about Feliciano. There was not a way he could find out about my two friends being together, especially if there were no spying eyes from any of Ludwig's coworkers. What the boss man did not know, did not hurt him, or my friends.

"Kiku?" Feliciano called out.

I turned to him, realizing he was waiting for a reply. "Ludwig-san is a grown man. I am sure he can take care of himself."

He shrugged and meekly nodded. "I-I know. It's just..." His cheeks grew pink, "I can't help but worry about him."

I pressed my lips together to prevent from smiling.

My friend gasped, "You must think I'm weird!"

"Why would I think that?"

Feliciano sank further into the tub. His knees popped up from the murky water. "Because I like him too much to be friends."

I vigorously shook my head. It was true, I thought Feliciano was weird, but not at all because of that.

He shot up to a sitting position. "I knew it! You do think I'm weird!"

I softly growled, "I would not care if you fell in love with a lamp post, Feli-kun."

He rambled, "When I was little, everyone used to laugh at me because I wore pretty dresses and liked boys! If Luddy found out-"

"If you are comfortable with it, you can wear whatever you want. I am sure he would be fine with that."

"How do you know?!"

I squeezed my eyes shut, the words cutting right through my head. "Please, do not yell like that."

Feliciano choked up. "Oh, no! You think I'm weird! You are going to leave me!"

"I never said that!" I snarled. He flinched away from me and whimpered. My jaw clenched. Just staring at his face made me unbelievably angry. I took deep breaths.

His gaze flickered from my face to my hands clutching onto the bath tub's rim. "Y-your hands are shaking." He slowly reached out to touch my fingers.

I pulled away, and grasped my arms. "Do not touch me."

Feliciano stared at me with innocently wide eyes. He reached for me again with the same hand that he killed my friend and threatened me. I lifted my leg and pressed my foot to his chest so he could not come closer. He let out a soft whine and dropped his arms back into water.

I gritted my teeth together. Red specks danced across my vision. If he did that one more time...

"Kiku," he pouted. "Something is wrong! Why won't you tell me?"

An awful yell escaped my lips as I lunged forward. My hands clamped around his throat as I fell onto him. His face became distorted underneath the water as bubbles erupted out of his mouth. My friend's legs flailed around from underneath me, and his nails dug into my arms. I hissed at the gashes he was scoring into my skin, tightening the grip on his neck as if to blame him.

"You made me like this!" I wailed. My eyes stung as tears slid down my cheeks. "You...you did..."

Eventually, Feliciano stopped struggling. His arms dropped into the water, and no more air bubbles came up to the surface. I squeezed his throat once more before recoiling. The hot flash of anger ebbed away, and I shivered. I scrambled over the bathtub, and flopped onto the floor. My entire body was shaking.

"F-Feli-kun!" I gasped, grabbing for my friend's body submerged in the water. I hoisted him up and out of the water. He landed on top of me, forcing the breath out of my lungs. I shook him and called out his name, but he did not respond. What have I done?!

I clenched my hands together and brought all my weight onto his chest. Nothing happened. My jaw trembled and I performed the maneuver again and again. Only a tiny sputter of water came from his lips. My hand ran through his hair as I bowed, pressing my forehead to his chest.

"Feli-kun, I am sorry. I do not know what came over me," I whispered. I took a few shaky breaths before announcing, "I need some air."

I snatched a towel from the back of the door and stumbled into the guest bedroom whilst scrubbing myself dry. The claw marks on my arms stung as I grabbed random articles of clothing and draped them over myself. I breezed out the room, and skittered down the hallway to escape my horrible deeds. My feet moved too fast, and I missed a step as I descended the stairs.

I fell backwards and slid down the rest of the way. The wood jabbed into my back, and my throat felt as if it tore open as a hoarse yell escaped from it. I panted, gathering up any courage and energy before pulling myself up and out of the house. Outside was cold and windy, but the fresh air did not ameliorate the suffocating feeling.

The rocks underneath me bit and tore into my feet as I wandered aimlessly. A car honked and whipped by me, and I looked up with unfocused eyes, but it was long gone. I stopped and stared where it disappeared.

Another vehicle rolled closer, but this one stopped. I flinched, despite the car being several paces from my rooted spot. A door opened, and the driver stepped onto the asphalt. "Hello? Are you all right, sir?"

Why does everyone ask that? Do I not look all right? Am I all right?

Another zappy voice called out, "Hey! Do you know you are standing in the middle of the road?"

I turned to the sound. Elizaveta and Gilbert were hanging out of her car, staring at me with horrified expressions. I bowed to them. "Hello, Gilbert-kun, Elizaveta-san. Long time no see," I said. Did I not see either of them in a while? Has it been a few days, or did the time reversal mean they have not seen me in several weeks?

"Kiku?!" Gilbert's rosy eyes almost popped out of his head. "What the hell, man?!"

Elizaveta ran over to me, and threw her arms around my shoulders. "What is wrong? Why are you standing there?"

Gilbert shouted, "Get him in the car!"

My friend towed me toward the vehicle, and opened the back door to coax me inside. "It will be okay, Kiku. We can go back to my place, and you can tell us anything you want to," Elizaveta murmured before closing the door once I was in the back seat.

They settled in their seats and buckled in. Gilbert glanced behind his shoulder from the passenger's side. "Shit, Kiku. You look like shit."

Elizaveta took one hand off the steering wheel to smack his head.

I felt like it, too. "Thank you."