"I wish they would have let someone ride with him. What if he thinks he's alone?" Phyllis turned, her eyes staring at Jill. "Did you see him at all? Did they let you talk to him?"

"No," Jill said softly, desperately trying to focus on the road ahead of her. "They were working on him when I got there and they wouldn't let me see him." She heard the shaky breath as it escaped her lungs and as she glanced over she could see tears streaming down her face. "Phyllis," she said softly, unsure of what to say.

"This is my fault," she managed, finally give voice to the thoughts that had been echoing in her head since the moment Jill had called her. "This is all because of me—because of my stupid decisions…" She turned her head, looking over at Jill. "It's just like you said…you said this would end in disaster. You said I would ruin him."

Jill sighed. Somehow she no longer wanted to be right. Reaching over tentatively, she touched her arm. Comforting her felt strange, but somehow it seemed the only humane thing to do. "This isn't your fault. You didn't make this happen. I don't know why this happened. It just did…but not because of you. Don't do that…don't blame yourself."

Silence settled in the car for a moment. Kindness wasn't something she was accustomed to handling—especially when it came from Jill. "He's gonna be ok, right?"

"Of course he is. My son's gonna be just fine."

Phyllis ran towards the emergency room entrance with Jill just behind her. She scanned the room for a sign of Billy and, seeing none, ran over to the nurse's desk.

"My son was just brought in by ambulance," Jill said quickly, her voice barely concealing the pure panic that was coursing through her body. "Billy Abbott…Can you tell me where he is, please?"

The nurse nodded, typing into the computer. "He's still in the trauma bay," she said solemnly. "If you'll wait right here, I'll let the doctor know you're here. Someone will be out to talk with you as soon as possible."

She opened her mouth to respond but the nurse had already walked away. Jill turned to face Phyllis. "So that's it? We just have to stand here and wait?" The calm exterior was beginning to crumble and she could feel her body begin to shake. "I can't just sit here and wait for someone to come out here and tell me if my son is ok. I haven't even been able to see him, to talk to him, to touch him. He doesn't even know I'm here. What if he?" She felt her chest tighten with fear and she gasped at the thought of never having a chance to say all the things she'd planned to.

Her eyes screamed as she looked up at Phyllis. "The things I said to him…I never planned on us being like this forever. I always figured we'd get over it. I didn't think he'd…"

Phyllis shook her head. "I know," she whispered, reaching out to touch her arm, this time realizing it was her turn to offer comfort no matter how strange it might seem. "I know Billy knows how much you love him. No matter what you say to him, no matter how much the two of you fight…he always knows that. You're his mother. He can always be certain of your love." She felt the rush of tears fill her eyes as she looked away, her breath catching in her throat as she felt the wave of guilt wash over her.

Jill saw the marked change in her countenance. "But it's not the same for you?"

She wiped her face quickly, composing herself and turning back towards her. "What?"

"I'm his mother. You said he knows I love him…but you're afraid he doesn't know that about you, right?" She didn't have to answer, the truth in the words played across her face.

Phyllis averted her eyes, the tears threatening to spill out again. "I made the decision to work on my marriage and that's what I'm going to do. I'm just sorry Billy got hurt in the process."

"You love him."

"I care about Billy. I told him that."

"You love him." Jill raised her hand to stop her before she protested again. "Just stop…please. God knows I've fought this long enough. I know I told you this would lead to disaster. I know I told you this would tear this family apart. I told you to go back to Jack, to fight for your marriage, but I told you those things because I truly believed this was some passing thing with the two of you."

"I love Jack. I do…"

"But you're not in love with him," Jill sighed. "I knew that the minute I saw your face tonight. This is the face of someone afraid they're about to lose their whole world—not the face of someone worrying about a friend they care about. Jack will always be important to you, but I'd venture to guess you haven't given him a second thought tonight."

She shook her head. "I was just trying to do the right thing," she whispered. "I thought if I went back to Jack…if I tried to remember how it used to be that it would be that way again. I believed we could find that feeling again, but it's gone. With Billy…I…."

Jill nodded. "You don't need to explain to me."

"Excuse me, Mrs. Abbott?" Jill and Phyllis turned towards the nurse and nodded expectantly.

The nurse smiled and gestured towards the hallway. "The doctor is ready to speak with you now."

It was as if someone had let the air out of her lungs.

"Are you alright?" Jill asked as she gestured towards a chair in the waiting area.

"I..I just.." Phyllis shook her head, her voice betraying her. "Jill."

Jill nodded, reaching out and squeezing her hand. "I know," she whispered. It was one thing to know this had been an accident, but to know this could have been intentional, to know the doctors had found gasoline on his clothes, to know the smoke inhalation coupled with the fumes could have permanently damaged his lungs.

"You still gonna tell me this isn't my fault?" Phyllis sobbed. "He had my picture in his hand…if that isn't an indictment; you want to tell me what is?"

"You aren't responsible for Billy's choices," she sighed. "I know you hurt him and he feels betrayed, but he chose this—not you."

"I never wanted to hurt him, Jill. " She looked up at her, seeing acceptance in her eyes for the first time. "I love him so much. I'd do anything for him."

"I know you would," she whispered, reaching out and squeezing her hand tight in her own. "And you know what? You might be the only person that can. The doctor said we can go see him in a minute and you can go in there and tell him everything you just told me. If he loves you half as much as I think he does, your love just might be enough to make him fight to come back to us."