Chapter 3: Gray

GRAY POV

Standing outside of the guild hall, I easily tuned out the sounds of the celebration. There was an initial mourning period for Wendy just after we managed to return from Edolas, but the return of Lisanna temporarily overshadowed the grief. Tomorrow the mourning from the guild would continue. Wendy had been a part of us for so little time, for her to be ripped away from us in such a manner was terrible.

I knew I shouldn't have done it, but my body itched for something, something that I hadn't longed for in months. Before I even realized it, I had wandered to the nearest store, purchased cigarettes, and was standing outside now, already halfway through the pack. The burn from the smoke felt soothing and I relished in this.

A voice approached me from inside, "Gray-sama?"

I turned and found who I had expected, "Juvia."

She was standing just barely inside the guild hall, her hands clenched together lowered to her waist. For once, her head was bent and she didn't appear to be blushing. Instead, she seemed hesitant.

Finally, she spoke again, "Gray-sama…Juvia would like to ask…how he is feeling."

Her voice was so quiet, I barely even heard her. I didn't respond. Instead, she gasped saying, "Gray-sama, your eyes! They are so red!"

I grumbled, "I'm fine." I took another whiff of the cigarette in my hand. Juvia seemed to finally notice it and without a word, she took the cigarette out of my hand, snuffed it out on the ground, found the rest of the pack and drenched them in water conjured in her hand.

"Hey…!" I tried lunging towards her, but she easily dodged me and I landed in a heap on the ground, "What was that for?"

Juvia reprimanded, "Gray-sama should know that those are bad for you! I didn't think Gray-sama would ever smoke…" she trailed off.

Sitting up against the wall, I sighed, "I did. I quit before you joined the guild. Felt like starting up again."

Juvia paused before asking quietly, "Is it because of Wendy?" I nodded and she sighed, "Juvia is here if you would like to talk to her. Gray-sama knows that. Does Gray-sama want to talk to Juvia?"

I didn't respond. I held a hand to my chest, beginning to remember what had happened not even a day ago. Whether I began talking to her or not, I don't know. All I know is that in this moment, I felt as though I was transported back into Edolas, just before Lucy, Happy, Carla, and I were about to rescue Wendy and Natsu.

After bursting out of the lacrima and rescuing my friends from the Edolas army, we all were racing down the corridor towards where Natsu's and Wendy's screams were coming from. For the past minute or so however, the sounds had ceased. As we turned the corner, we came up to a huge ornate door.

Just before I knocked it down, I felt my heart skip a beat and a chill travel up my body. It had been a while since I had felt this way. The most recent time was when I encountered Deliora, the demon of the Book of Zeref, trapped within my master Ur's sacrifice: Iced Shell.

Something very bad was beyond this door.

I could feel it.

Breaking the door down, the sight before my eyes caused my heart to drop to my stomach. The room was a giant cave, the ceiling looming ominously above us. Inside were two stones, an intricate dragon carved onto each surface. Also on them were the figures of Natsu and Wendy; Natsu was unconscious while Wendy appeared catatonic. There was an old man in front of both of them, holding onto some kind of strange looking machine.

Without even thinking, I tore the man away from the machine, throwing him against a wall. I held him against it, watching him claw at my hand gripping his clothes. I growled towards the others, tossing them the bottle of x-balls I had in my pocket. Immediately, Lucy snatched the bottle out of the air and moved towards Natsu and Wendy. I had explained to them earlier about that the x-balls allowed Earthland mages to generate and release magic in Edolas. Lucy and Happy went to Natsu's side while Carla was trying to get Wendy to respond to any of our attempts to speak to her.

A few moments passed before I heard a scream. Momentarily distracted, I turned towards the rocks only to see that Natsu was now conscious, and he had the darkest look I had ever seen on his face. Magic poured out of him in waves, causing Lucy who was closest to him yelp and jump back in panic. Before I could even react, Natsu lunged in my direction. Out of habit, I prepared to defend myself only for him to zoom right by me, snatch the man that I had dropped by the head, and slam him into the ground.

"NATSU!" Lucy screamed, but he didn't seem to pay any attention to her. All of his focus was on the man that was struggling beneath his grip.

Growling low, so much that I shivered in fear, Natsu said to the man, "You hurt Wendy. You hurt her. I'm going to kill you."

"Hey!" I shouted, "That's not the way we do things Natsu! We don't kill." At my outburst, he looked towards me and it took all I had not to cower. According to how he himself and Erza had described it, Natsu had somehow shifted into Dragon Force. His skin was covered in dark red scales and his eyes had dilated even more than they usually were. I could have sworn that there were flecks of red flashing in his eyes.

Just now, I heard another scream, 'WENDY! NO!" Turning to the sound, I saw that the sky dragon slayer had been released from the chains, lying limp in Lucy's arms. Then I took a closer look at her entire figure. Her blank stare and slack jaw, combined with the fact that there was no visible breathing, it didn't take a genius to figure it out.

No…that's impossible…she was only with us a few hours ago…she can't be…

But the evidence was overwhelming. At that moment, it was as though I had transported back to my home village, when my father and mother died in the attack of Deliora. As the life left their bodies, their expressions became similar, hopeful but at the same time, blank and desperate. The same signs were on Wendy's face now.

And she wasn't moving.

She was dead.

Natsu growled low, "She isn't dead. She's strong. She isn't dead." I hadn't realized that I had said that last bit out loud, but clearly Natsu had heard me.

Even though my heart was filled with conflicting powerful emotions, the current matter at hand was to calm Natsu down and make sure he understood the truth. I iced up my hands in case, because I knew from past experience that this conversation wasn't going to be pretty. While Natsu had never seen death first hand before, he had experienced forms of grief, and that usually made him unpredictable. I had no idea what he was going to do, but based on the way that he was acting now…the next few minutes weren't going to be fun for either of us.

I gripped the side of the cave, breathing heavily. As expected, Natsu had not believed me when I spoke the truth about Wendy. Ultimately, he fought me with everything he had, coming to an inch of killing me. Somehow, he ended up by Wendy and Lucy and it was through the blonde that he managed to calm down enough so that he wasn't rampaging. Even so, the fight hurt. I was pretty thoroughly injured from Natsu's hands.

Natsu wouldn't look in any of our directions. Instead, he stared off at a random section of wall before his fist clenched, encasing in flame once more. I tensed in preparation but I knew that if he attacked me again, I wouldn't be able to fend him off this time. However, this time he mumbled something about Exceeds being attacked and that the king of Edolas needed to be stopped.

My thoughts abruptly stopped there as I recognized Juvia's hand upon my shoulder. I turned to her touch, but otherwise did not acknowledge it.

She said softly, "Does Gray-sama feel any better after telling Juvia what Gray-sama said?"

I pondered her question for a moment before answering, "No." She hung her head before I added, "I feel angrier and more scared. What happened with Wendy reminded me that anybody can die, at any moment, no matter who they are. I'm angry at myself that we were just a little bit too late to save them and I'm angry that stuff like this always happens. People dying suddenly. Juvia…" Her head popped up at the sound of her name. I turned and gripped her shoulders, feeling my eyes becoming wild. I asked, almost wantonly, "Please Juvia. Please don't be going anywhere. I don't know what I would do if I lost you too."

Without even thinking, I collapsed to my knees, still holding onto her. She came down with me, and without another word, she quietly embraced me back, allowing me to feel her warmth.

I don't know how long we stayed there silently. All I knew was that come the next morning, while my grief and anger would not be gone, I would channel it into my purpose: to protect those that I cared about.

I couldn't lose anyone else. That was a promise.

Because I've been getting messages about this, I'll answer it here.

YES! I will eventually be doing Carla. I want to do her last because I feel that hers will be the most complicated because Wendy was her first friend and major companion. I don't want to do it wrong. So I started with Natsu because his was second in intensity for the loss of Wendy. I'm going to do the rest of the team first and finally finish with Carla. Coming full circle.