Chapter 34
Johnny walked down the familiar corridor in search of his partner. He found Roy leaning against the wall just outside of treatment room two.
"How's Beverly?" Johnny asked, siding up to his partner, handy talkie dangling from his wrist.
"Vitals are improving and she's more alert now," Roy responded. He looked past his partner towards the entrance of the emergency department. "Marco on his way?"
"Yea... He didn't say much on the way back to the station," Johnny stated, knowing that Roy was as curious as he was about the matter at hand. "Man, I'd hate to be in his shoes right now."
"This isn't like Marco," Roy said, his worried blue eyes still searching the hallway behind Johnny. "I understand pregnancies kind of slipping up on you. Chris caught us by surprise, but... but I was happy... scared, but happy. Marco looks like he's about to walk the plank."
"Yea, well, you were married. Maybe he's concerned about bein' a part-time father," Johnny commented.
"They've been seein' each other for a while now, and they seem happy, so... He doesn't have to be a weekend dad."
Johnny's expressive face clouded over. "Roy... you don't think that... maybe Marco isn't the-"
"Hey, Marco," Roy called out, stopping Johnny from embarrassing himself. "She's improving and she's more alert now. She's been asking for you."
Marco's ears perked up at that comment. "She has?"
"Yes, I told her you were on your way," Roy said, patting his friend on the shoulder. "Dr. Brackett and Dixie are in there with her now." He placed his flattened hand against the door. "I'll let them know you're here."
"Uh, Roy... I'll just... I'll just wait for them to come out. I'm sure she..." Marco was trying desperately to come up with an excuse for his hesitation, but he couldn't find one that sounded plausible. He leaned his back against the cold wall, his shoulders slumping. "She, uh... She refused my proposal yesterday," he mumbled, his voice a mixture of disappointment and concern.
"Aww, man... Marco, I'm sorry," Johnny said, grimacing in sympathy. "That's got to be tough."
"Yea... She just told me yesterday that she thought she might be..." he paused, rubbing his forehead with his fingers. "That she might be pregnant. I was gonna propose even before I knew about that, but... she doesn't want to marry me."
Before either of the paramedics could respond, the door opened and Dr. Brackett walked out, his concerned face relaxing a bit when he locked eyes with Marco. He hoped that the lineman would be able to shed some light on Beverly's emotional state.
"Marco, I'm glad you're here. Why don't you come to my office while Dixie gets her cleaned up? Then you can see her," the dark-haired physician suggested.
"We'll check on her on our next run," Johnny told his friend, taking a step backwards.
"Call us if you need anything," Roy said, turning to head for the supply room to restock the squad.
"Thanks, fellas," Marco replied, following the physician to room 127.
Dr. Brackett entered the office, walking behind his desk to his large leather chair. "Have a seat, Marco," he said, gesturing to the green chairs in front of his desk.
"Is she going to be okay?" Marco asked worriedly, sitting down and leaning his elbows on his knees. His stomach felt like he had swallowed a stone and he could hear the blood rushing in his ears. What would he do if something else was wrong with her besides a pregnancy?
"I think so," Dr. Brackett offered, seeing the obvious relief on the lineman's face. "I've ordered a lot of lab work, which will take a little while to get the results back, but," he glanced down at his hands then back up at the man sitting in front of him. "I have to ask you some questions and they might not be easy to answer."
Dark blood-shot eyes looked up at the physician. "Is she... pregnant?"
"Well, that's part of the lab work we're waiting on." He shifted in his seat, dreading the question he had to ask. "I need to know more about her mood lately. Is there anything you can tell me?"
"She's been nauseated for a couple of weeks. She hasn't been eating much, and she's had really bad headaches and dizzy spells. Is that what you mean?"
Dr. Brackett made a mental note of the symptoms Marco had just described, but he really hadn't answered the question Dr. Brackett had asked him. "That's helpful information and I'll make a note in her chart, but Marco, Beverly has a suspicious injury along her left wrist. Is it possible that... that the wound was self-inflicted?"
For the second time since coming on shift, Marco felt like he had been punched in the gut. Was it possible that Beverly was capable of self-harm? Would she ever consider killing herself? His mind quickly replayed the details of their last conversation. She had been so adamant about not terminating the pregnancy, if she found out that she was expecting a child. Why would she try to kill herself just a few hours later?
Slowly he shook his head. "No... No, Doc, she can't be suicidal."
"She's been through a lot in her life, Marco. Sometimes a reaction to trauma can be quite delayed. Perhaps something inside of her snapped when she realized she might be pregnant?"
"No... I know how it looks, but it's not true. She just told me about her suspicions yesterday and she was, well... She told me she wouldn't consider ending the pregnancy, not that I asked her to, because I didn't. In fact, I asked her to marry me...," he looked down at his hands resting between his knees. "She turned me down, but... She wasn't... she wasn't suicidal, Doc, honest."
"I'm glad to hear that. With the location of the injury, being on her left wrist and her being right-handed... I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't cover all the possibilities," Dr. Brackett explained. He looked at the forlorn look on Marco's face and chose to address it. "I'm sorry that she refused your proposal. I'm sure this is a very stressful time for you both."
"Yea," Marco said, not making eye contact.
"She's asked for you a couple of times since she came in. Why don't we go see if Dixie is through getting her ready to go upstairs?"
"How long will she be here?" Marco asked, worriedly.
Dr. Brackett looked at the lineman with a bit of surprise in his eyes. "I want to keep her overnight for observation and to get more fluids in her. She was very dehydrated when she came in. I'll allow you to spend the night with her, if you'd like?"
"I'm not sure she'll even want to see me, Doc, but I really appreciate your offer. I'll wait and... I'll see what she says."
Marco followed the physician towards the office door, his face downtrodden as he lumbered down the hallway.
Inside treatment room two, Dixie had helped Beverly get into a hospital gown. She had used a warm cloth to remove as much dried blood as she could from the younger woman's face and arms.
"You've had a rough morning, huh?" Dixie asked, hoping to engage Beverly in a conversation.
"I've had a rough three weeks," she commented.
"You've got a handsome fireman waiting to see you," Dixie responded, having heard Marco's voice when Dr. Brackett had exited the room.
"Had," Beverly replied. "I don't think he'll want to... see me now," she said, closing her eyes as Dixie placed a cold ice pack on the side of her head near her swollen left eye.
"Oh, you're beautiful, even if you do have a shiner," Dixie kidded.
Beverly offered a slight smile. "It's not my looks... It's me."
"You're selling Marco short, aren't you?"
Beverly didn't say anything for several moments. "Dixie, have you ever done something you regretted, really regretted, and... and you don't even know why you did it?"
"Oh, I think we've all done things we regret," the head nurse said, reassuringly. "It's not what we've done that matters as much as how we handle it afterwards." She looked down at the pale woman lying on the exam table. "Did you do something to Marco that you regret?"
Beverly swallowed hard, closing her eyes as she relayed to Dixie the events of the previous day. "I wish I could take it all back, Dixie, but... but it's too late now."
"Ahem," Marco cleared his throat to announce his presence.
Dixie offered the lineman a warm smile then looked back down at her patient. "And here's that handsome fireman now." She leaned down closer to Beverly's ear. "You have a second chance, Beverly. Take it."
Dixie straightened back up, double checking the flow of the IV. "I'm going to give you two some privacy. If you need anything, I'll be at the nurses' station. Just stick your head out the door," she instructed Marco as she walked past, patting him on the shoulder. She jerked her head in the direction of the bed, silently urging him to go over to the place where Beverly lay. "We'll be ready to move her upstairs in a few minutes."
Marco was still stunned by how pale Beverly looked. He reached out to run his fingers through her hair. "How do you feel?"
Beverly sniffled, feeling the warmth of his touch in stark contrast to the numbing feeling of the ice pack on the opposite side. "S-stupid."
"Aww, Bev. You haven't been feeling well. Anybody who's been dizzy is subject to falling."
"That's not... what I... mean," she said, her voice choking. "I'm talking about... what I... said to you... yesterday. I'm... I'm so sorry, Marco."
"Ssshhh," he whispered. "Don't worry about that. You have a right to... to decide what you want, and... and if I'm not it, then..." He gulped, unable to continue. He desperately wanted to ask her about the paternity of the potential pregnancy, but he didn't dare. Even though they might not be getting married, that didn't stop him from caring about her and her health.
Beverly struggled to find the right words to convince him that he was what she wanted, that she did want to marry him, but she couldn't explain her behavior from the day before. She began to think about how hurt Marco had looked when she had declined his proposal, and she wished she could take it all back. Would he even consider forgiving her for rejecting him so badly? If he couldn't, then the only thing that might offer her a little bit of comfort for the loss was the possibility that she was carrying his child. Then she thought about the group session she had facilitated the day before. Risk and trust had been the topic of the session. To gain something required risking something. In all honesty, she had nothing to lose. She reached her hand out, grateful when he accepted it, stroking the back of her hand with his thumb. She was about to speak, to ask for his forgiveness, when there was a knock on the exam room door.
"May I come in?" Dr. Brackett asked, carrying a few pieces of paper in his hands. He didn't wait for a response before walking over to his patient and placing a hand on her shoulder. "Well, I have some answers for you. I know why you've been feeling so awful. You're anemic, Beverly. You're also dehydrated, and I suspect you have an ulcer forming. But it's nothing that some fluids, medication, a healthy diet, and a lot of rest won't fix."
"Am... I..."
Dr. Brackett looked into her eyes, unsure if he was seeing hope or dread in the emerald orbs. "No, Beverly. You're not pregnant."
Marco felt a sense of relief wash over him. At least there wouldn't be a child trapped in a dead relationship. But her reaction shocked him to his core.
"Nooo," she whimpered, silent sobs wracking her body as she tightly gripped the sheet covering her. She had been so certain, and somewhere deep inside of her, she had even been hopeful. Now she had truly lost everything – her relationship with Marco, and the child that had never actually existed.
Judging by her reaction, Dr. Brackett realized that she had been hoping the results would be positive. He tried to console her, but she didn't respond to him. He looked over at Marco, seeing the mixture of emotions on his face.
"Beverly, I'm going to give you something to help you relax. Your body needs a lot of rest in order to heal and you can't rest when you're this upset." He walked over to the cabinet, withdrawing a vial and a syringe. He carefully injected the medication into her IV port, then made a note in her chart. He checked her vitals again as he waited for the medication to have the desired effect.
Slowly the warmth of the anxiolytic took effect and she felt her body relaxing, her eyes drifting closed, and somewhere, she thought she even felt Marco's warm caress along her face once more.
Dr. Brackett looked over at Marco, clearing his throat to gain the attention of the fireman. "Marco, I know she doesn't have any family. I don't mean to put any pressure on you, but I need to know if you're going to stay with her. If not, then I want to call in one of our off duty nurses. I don't want her to be alone right now."
Marco looked into the concerned blue eyes of the emergency physician and he saw nothing but concern on the older man's face. "I'm not leaving her, Doc," he said, continuing to stroke her hair as she drifted off to sleep. "I'm going to stay with her and... try to convince her to stay at Mama's house while she recuperates."
Dr. Brackett offered him a smile and a nod. "That's the best idea I can think of, Marco. Your mother's tender loving care is better medicine than anything I can prescribe." He looked back down at his patient, checking her pulse one final time. It was slowing down as was her respiration rate. "She's ready to be moved to the floor. I'll go make the call now."
Dixie walked in the door just as Dr. Brackett reached for the wall phone. She stepped over to Marco, noting that Beverly seemed to be resting. "She's going to be fine, Marco."
He merely offered her a weak smile. He wished he had her confidence.
Dixie listened to Dr. Brackett requesting that Beverly be moved to the floor. "Marco, it's lunchtime. Why don't you go by the cafeteria? I think she'll sleep for a while and you need to take care of yourself."
Marco's eyes never left Beverly's injured face. "I can't, Dix. I can't leave her alone, not even for a few minutes."
"Okay," she said, offering the lineman a sympathetic smile. "I'll check on you on my next break."
"Dixie, let's get one more set of vitals before she's moved," Dr. Brackett ordered, using that as an opportunity to pat Marco on the shoulder. "If you need anything, Marco, you ask the nurses to call me. I mean it."
"Thank you," the lineman responded, turning to look at the bumping sound of a gurney being brought into the room. He watched as her limp form was quickly transferred to the gurney and then walked behind the orderlies as they exited the treatment room. He was about to follow them toward the elevators when a familiar voice called out to him.
"Marco? How is she?"
Lexi's dark eyes penetrated Marco's crumbling exterior. Seeing the sight of his little sister there to support Beverly made him melt into her embrace.
"Oh Lexi... Thank you for... for calling us." He pulled back, glancing down the hallway at the gurney waiting by the elevators. "She's being admitted overnight. She's dehydrated and anemic."
Lexi matched Marco's strides as they hurriedly caught up with the orderlies. "And exhausted, I'm sure."
Marco looked over at his sister. "What do you mean?"
"She's had three rescues in the last two weeks and... and one of them...," Lexi looked down at her feet, hesitating when the elevator doors opened. "Um, I need to let Mama know what's going on. What room is she being taken to?"
Marco looked at the orderlies.
"402," one of them said.
"I'll be up in just a minute. Mama's in the parking lot waiting on me. She sends her love, but she has Antonio with her and he's too young to visit."
"I understand and... I really appreciate you coming by, Lex."
"I'd... I'd like to stay a little while, okay?"
"Thank you," Marco announced, feeling relieved. If anybody could give him some insight into what Beverly might be thinking, it was Lexi. "I'd like that. You can take my car home later."
Lexi watched as the doors of the elevator closed, then turned to walk back out to the parking lot. Beverly and Marco had been there for her when she needed them most. Now it was time for Lexi to return the favor.
E!
At Station 51, Mike and Chet walked into the kitchen, following their captain. No one said a word as they each poured themselves coffee and sat down at the table. The sound of the squad backing into the bay caused Hank to lift his hazel eyes from the table where he had been staring.
"Alright, you fellas sit tight. I'm gonna get Roy and John and we'll have a quick meeting while we wait on Marco's replacement."
The two paramedics wandered into the kitchen before Hank had a chance to leave the table.
"Hey fellas, have a seat," Hank requested, gesturing towards the empty chairs. "How's Beverly?"
"She was improving when we left. I think they'll probably keep her, thought," Roy explained, dragging a chair out from the table.
"How's Marco?" Chet asked, somberly. He had been as stunned as the others upon learning of Beverly's possible pregnancy.
"Not good," Johnny spoke up, opening up the refrigerator and pouring himself a glass of milk before assuming his seat at the kitchen table.
"He asked her to marry him yesterday, but she said no," Roy mumbled, feeling sorry for his coworker.
"Aww man," Chet groaned. "Why would she do that?"
Johnny and Mike cut the lineman knowing glares.
"What?" Chet asked, raising his shoulders, unable to make sense of what he was hearing.
"Let it go, Chet," Mike suggested, unwilling to say what he was thinking about the paternity of the possible pregnancy. "We just need to be supportive of Marco, right?" the engineer asked, his blue eyes searching the faces of the group.
"She was asking for him on the way to Rampart," Roy commented. "Maybe things will work out with them once she's feeling better."
Johnny downed half the glass of milk, using the back of his hand to wipe his upper lip. "It's been one helluva year, hasn't it?"
"Yea," Hank groused, thinking the same thing. "But we're all still here. We'll make it through this trial, too. And so will Marco and Beverly, with our help."
There was silence around the room as each man was caught up in his own thoughts. Finally, Johnny broke the silence.
"I, uh... I need to let you fellas know that... I won't be here next shift," the dark-haired paramedic said softly. "My deposition is Friday in Selma."
"I'm sorry, Johnny. I was hoping that wouldn't be necessary," Mike said, offering whatever comfort his words might bring to his downtrodden friend.
"Yea... me, too," Johnny said, tapping his index finger on the top of the table.
"Is this the twilight zone, or somethin'?" Chet groused, running his fingers through his curly hair. "I mean, what deity have we all pissed off lately, huh?"
"Chet, we haven't done anything wrong. We've just had a run o' bad luck, that's all," Johnny piped up, hoping to convince himself as well as his shiftmate.
Chet propped his elbow on the table, resting his chin in his hand. He picked at the gold flakes on the top of the kitchen table, his mind wandering. His own previous difficulties had seemed to set off the chain of events, but now his life couldn't be better. He had a beautiful fiancée he loved, and a sweet little future stepdaughter that he was thinking of as his own child. He had reconciled with his father, and was getting married in just a few months. His blue eyes looked around at the assembled group. Captain Stanley had been the next one to succumb to the run of bad luck, as Johnny called it, but now he and Mrs. Stanley were doing great. Roy and Joanne had had their difficulties, but all seemed to be well there. Mike had experienced one of the worst accusations any fireman could endure, and yet, he had overcome it. Not only had he been exonerated of any wrong-doing, but the damsel in distress he had rescued had become his new girlfriend. Then there was Marco. He had gone through the elation of finding his sister, having her return from the sordid life of prostitution, and in the process seemed to have found the love of his life. However, his life seemed to be falling apart. And what about Johnny? He had been through hell in the last month, nearly dying, and if that wasn't enough, now he was being asked to return to the place that had devastated him as a teenager, to testify against a secret society with more power and influence than anyone could imagine.
As the curly haired lineman continued allowing his mind to wander, his eyes grew larger and larger. "Hey, fellas, remember that traffic accident we worked? The one where we couldn't find the victim?"
"Yea, so?" Johnny asked, unsure of where his coworker was going. That run had absolutely nothing to do with the issues facing them now.
Chet sat back in his chair. "It's the aliens."
Johnny narrowed his eyes in disbelief. "What are you talkin' 'bout, Kelly?" the paramedic questioned, not seeing the exasperated looks on the faces of the other men.
Roy lowered his head to the table while Mike rolled his eyes. Neither man could believe what they were hearing.
"Don'tcha see, Gage? All this stuff that's been goin' on... It started when we couldn't find the victim at that TA. And...," the lineman's voice began to grow louder. "Think about it. That place where the aliens crashed... um...," he snapped his fingers in the air. "Roswell... Don't they call it, um, yea... Area 51? That's it! The aliens have confused us, Station 51, with the place where their relatives crashed, Area 51, and now they're-"
"Aww, go play on the freeway, Chet!" Johnny argued, not in the mood to deal with the antics of Chester B. Kelly.
Roy pushed away from the table to pour himself a cup of coffee, wishing he had something stronger to mix with it. Mike stood up and wandered out of the room, needing to find a place to regain his sanity. Hank walked over to the place where his two younger men were involved in the asinine alien conversation. He gripped them both by the backs of their necks. "Knock it off, you twits!"
E!
Marco sat down in the plastic chair in Beverly's room, slumping down in the chair and leaning his head back against the wall. He had some decisions to make about their relationship, but at least those decisions didn't involve planning for the future of a child. He loved Beverly with all his heart, but how did she feel about him? Roy said she had been asking for him in the ambulance and then she had apologized in the treatment room. What did all of that mean? He sat there, watching her sleeping, startled when there was a soft knock on the door.
Lexi stuck her head in the doorway and whispered. "May I come in?"
Marco nodded, waving her in, not wanting to risk waking Beverly. He pulled a second chair over beside the place where he sat and patted the seat. "Thought you changed your mind," he whispered, glancing at the clock on the wall.
Lexi accepted the chair, looking back and forth between her brother and her friend. "Sorry, I drove Mama and Antonio home, ate a sandwich for lunch and then came back. I thought you might need a break.
"That's thoughtful of you, but... I'm fine."
She's pale," Lexi commented, noting how weak her friend looked.
"Yea... that's the anemia." Marco waited for a few moments before turning to look at Lexi. "What were you about to tell me downstairs? About her rescues?"
Lexi licked her lips, looking down at her fingernails. "She's had some tough rescues lately, and one of them... Marco, she got called out to rescue a girl from a house where... where she," Lexi nodded her head at Beverly's still form. "It was the place where Beverly had been rescued years ago... the same place... the same john..."
"Ohmygod," Marco groaned, scrubbing his face with his hands.
"But Marco... the girl... she didn't survive."
"What?" Marco's eyes grew wide.
"Her pimp found out she had called for help, and… and he beat her up. By the time the cops and Beverly arrived to help her, they found her lying on the front porch. She literally died in Beverly's arms."
Marco pinched the bridge of his nose, wondering how Beverly had kept going after that had happened. "Why... Why didn't she tell me?"
Lexi walked over to Marco's chair and sat on the armrest, placing her arm around his shoulders. "For the same reason you don't talk to her about your bad runs, where people die in the most gruesome ways."
Marco exhaled a cleansing breath. "I talk about it with my shiftmates... I don't want to... to burden her with those... images."
"Exactly... Only someone who's been there can fully appreciate what you've seen and been through. And, you want to protect your loved ones from those experiences, right?"
Marco nodded his head in understanding. He leaned his elbows on his knees, running his fingers through his hair as he stared at the floor. After several long moments of processing what he had heard, he leaned back up, looking at his sister.
"She... she told me yesterday that she thought she was pregnant. Don't be mad at me, Lexi, please..."
"Why would I be mad at you? Who am I to judge?" she asked, lifting her eyebrows slightly.
"I asked her to marry me... but she said no," Marco commented, his voice sounding distraught.
Lexi gazed over at Beverly and then back at Marco. "Is she?"
Marco shook his head. "I... I wanted to marry her anyway, Lexi. I was even planning on asking her as soon as I had the money to get a ring, but... She told me no."
"Maybe she isn't ready, yet."
"I think there's more to it than that." Marco shifted his eyes from his sister back to the place where Beverly lay sleeping.
"What do you mean?" Lexi asked.
"We found out, down in the emergency room, that... she isn't pregnant. Lexi, she was so upset. I mean, it was like she wanted to be pregnant, but... But if she had been pregnant... I don't think it could've been mine."
Lexi was confused by the things she was hearing from her brother, and she knew he was upset. "Wait, are you saying that you and she haven't..."
"No, no..." Marco rubbed his forehead with his fingers. This was harder to discuss with his sister than he had anticipated. "We have... I... I love her and... it just seemed right, but... there hasn't been enough time for her to be pregnant... at least not by me."
"Marco!" Lexi argued in a stage whisper. "How could you accuse her of cheating on you?"
The hushed whispers had roused Beverly from her sleep, but she recognized the voices and decided to lie there, eavesdropping on the conversation. She was grateful that her face was turned away from Lexi and Marco, so they wouldn't see the tears that had slipped from beneath her closed eyes.
"I'm not, Lex... I'm not accusing her of anything. I just... If she loved me and if she thought the baby was mine... why wouldn't she marry me?"
Lexi couldn't give him a good answer. She could see the stress on his face. When she heard his stomach growl, she placed a hand on his shoulder. "Have you eaten lunch?"
Marco shook his head.
"Go eat. I'll stay here with her. You need to keep your strength up."
Marco knew she was right. He needed to eat, but he also needed to clear his head. "Maybe you're right. You don't mind staying with her? I don't want her to wake up alone."
"Of course not. She stayed with me when she didn't even know me. Now she's my friend. I'm here for her, and for you," Lexi explained.
"Thanks, sis," Marco said, standing up. "I'll be back as soon as I can. If she...," he hung his head. "If she wakes up while I'm gone, tell her I... I love her and I'll be back soon."
Lexi nodded her head in agreement. She hoped that was exactly what would happen because she wanted to have a private conversation with the woman who had saved her life.
Beverly waited until she was sure Marco was gone before she began to stir.
Lexi reached for the magazine Marco had left in his chair, but she heard a shuffling sound coming from the bed and looked up. "Beverly? Beverly, it's Lexi. How do you feel? Do I need to get you something?"
Beverly shifted so she could see Lexi with her non-swollen eye. "Thank you… for being here."
"Hey," the younger woman said, sitting on the edge of the bed and brushing Beverly's light brown hair away from her face. "That's what friends do. We're here for each other. Marco's been with you. He just went to the cafeteria to get something to eat. He'll be back in just a few minutes. He… He said to give you his love."
Beverly felt her lips begin to tremble. "I… I really messed up, Lexi. He… He hates me, doesn't he?"
"Of course not! Beverly, he loves you very much. He's just confused about why you turned down his proposal," Lexi said, hoping her friend would take the bait.
"I wish I knew," the broken woman cried. "I… I don't know why I pushed him away."
Lexi waited for Beverly's sobs to settle down before she continued. "I know exactly why you turned him down and so do you."
Beverly sniffled. "I'm not pregnant, Lexi. I… I was so sure I was, but Dr. Brackett said I'm not."
"Why were you so sure?"
Beverly thought about the parts of the conversation she had just overheard, and she knew what Lexi was hinting at. "I… I had the symptoms. I knew it was a little too soon, but… I was dizzy, vomiting, and I had headaches. I… I missed two of my pills and… and we didn't use a back-up method, so…," she looked away, picking at the blanket covering her body.
"Sounds like maybe you were kind of hoping you were," Lexi commented, leading Beverly to say more.
The older woman shrugged her shoulders. "I dunno… maybe…," she sniffled, inspecting the bandages on her left wrist and hand. "I… I heard part of what Marco said earlier and…"
"Which part?"
"About the timing of everything… He's thinking I… I cheated on him, isn't he?"
"It's a valid question, Beverly," Lexi stated with no hint of judgment or accusation in her voice. "Beverly, I grew up with four older brothers, and I think of you as… as the big sister I never had, but… Marco's point is understandable, don't you think?"
Beverly lowered her face once more. She nodded her head in agreement. "Yea… I didn't cheat on him, Lexi. I swear, I didn't. I… I haven't had sex with anyone else since I left the business."
Relief washed over Lexi. She was hearing exactly what she had hoped to hear. "Then why did you refuse to marry him?"
Beverly lay in bed, staring around the room, but not looking at the young woman sitting on the edge of her bed. She felt the lump in her throat growing. She coughed trying to dislodge it.
Lexi looked at the pale woman lying in the hospital bed, looking very frail, weak, and vulnerable. "Beverly, we both know why you refused his request. Why don't you just admit it to him?"
Beverly shook her head. "No… He wouldn't understand."
"Give him a chance. He deserves it, don't you think?"
"I can't… explain it, Lexi. I don't know how to tell him so he'd understand."
Lexi stood up and began pacing around the room. She had to think of a way to get her friend to open up to Marco. "Humph… and to think I believed you, Beverly."
"What?"
"I believed you when you told us at the group session that we needed to take a chance on someone close to us, that we should trust them… I believed you. But you were lying, weren't you? You don't even believe it yourself? You're a fraud!"
"I am NOT a… fraud! You DO have to risk something sometimes, because it's the only way to learn to trust again. You KNOW that, Lexi!"
Lexi spun around on her heels and her dark eyes bore holes into Beverly's weakened body. "Exactly! And you aren't willing to trust Marco completely, because you're afraid he's going to leave you. So instead of taking the risk, you just go ahead and push him away. You did it to protect yourself!"
"Yes! Alright, are you happy now? Yes, I… I told him… no, so… so…" Her sobs broke into her explanation.
"So you would be the one in control," Lexi stated softly, returning to her place on the bed. "I get it. It makes perfect sense to me."
Beverly sniffled, wiping her face with the tissue Lexi handed her. "But I hurt him… I was wrong. I… You're right; I'm a fraud."
Lexi offered a sympathetic smile. "The great Beverly Marsh is human after all. You aren't a fraud… You're afraid, and that's okay."
"It's not okay to hurt… hurt the man I love. He'll never be able to… to forgive me, will he?"
Lexi knew the answer, but she wasn't about to say it out loud. "That's a risk you're going to have to take. He'll be back here in just a few minutes. Maybe you need to tell him the truth. He'll understand why you did it, but I can't speak for him as to whether or not he'll forgive you."
"I know," Beverly said, cowering down lower in the bed. Her exhaustion was threatening to pull her under once more.
"But you'll give him a chance, right? When he walks back through that door, I'm going to leave and… and you'll tell him the truth and give him the opportunity to forgive you, right?"
Beverly closed her eyes. Lexi was right. It was time she gave more than lip service to the things she was counseling her ladies on – it was time she walked the walk, too. She nodded her head, holding the tissue to her runny nose.
"I will… I promise." She tossed the tissue in the tiny wastebasket beside her bed. "Thank you… Thank you for… for holding me… accountable."
Lexi offered a smile to the woman she really hoped would become her sister-in-law. "You did it for me. It isn't pleasant, but it works."
Beverly offered a slight nervous chuckle. "Yea… it does."
The door of her room slowly opened, and Marco entered carrying a white sack of food and a soft drink. "I thought I'd eat…," he began with a whisper, but stopped when he realized that Beverly was awake. "Bev?"
"Hey," she replied softly, cutting her eyes at Lexi who was smiling broadly.
"Marco, I think I'll leave you two alone now. I'll see you at Mama's house."
Marco set his food down, fishing his keys out of his pocket and passing them over to her. "I'll walk you out. Beverly, are you hungry?"
Lexi winked at Beverly while Marco's back was turned to her. "I'll walk myself out. You stay here. I think Beverly has something to tell you, don't you, Beverly?"
Marco saw the looks passing between his sister and Beverly, and for the first time, his heart held a sense of hope.
"Yes… Do you have a few minutes to talk?" Beverly asked.
A huge smile spread from beneath the bushy mustache. "I have all night… and the rest of my life," he said, taking a seat on the edge of the bed where Lexi had been sitting. "I'll share my tuna fish sandwich and Pepsi with you."
Beverly's vision became misty, as she looked into the dark eyes she so loved. "I love you, Marco."
"I love you, too."
"I hope you feel better soon, Beverly. Marco, call me when she gets discharged. Mama's getting the guest room ready," Lexi announced as she backed out of the door and headed down the hallway.
The next hour was spent with Marco coaxing Beverly to eat part of his sandwich while Beverly tried her best to explain her behavior from the previous day. While Marco didn't fully understand it, he understood that she regretted how she had treated him, and she had told him she loved him. In the grand scheme of things, nothing else mattered.
"I'm not making any sense, am I?"
"Well... I have to admit that I don't understand it all, but I've never walked in your shoes. I don't pretend to understand how you're feeling, but that doesn't mean that I don't believe you. It's just all confusing to me."
An uncomfortable silence settled around them.
"Marco, is there any possible way that you can forgive me?"
Marco toed off his shoes and laid down beside her. He curled onto his side, pulling her into an embrace, careful not to dislodge her IV or cause her left arm further injury. Beverly allowed her body to melt into his, lying partially on top of him as he wrapped his arms around her.
"Sweetheart, I forgive you. It's not even a question. But there is one question that I want you to think about, but don't give me an answer, yet. I want you to think about my proposal yesterday. I'm taking it off the table, but only temporarily."
Beverly flinched, wondering what he meant.
"I'm going to ask you the same question again very soon, but this time, I'm going to do it right," he said, pulling the blanket up around her shoulders.
"Does that mean that everything's going to be okay… between us?" she asked, her voice raspy.
"It already is. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere - ever. We finally know why you've been feeling so badly lately, and we're going to have you feeling better real soon. I'd say things couldn't be better, cariño. Now, just close your eyes and get some rest. I'll be right here when you wake up."
E!
By the time Dixie's shift ended, she was exhausted, but she had promised to check on Beverly and Marco before she left. So she shouldered her purse and headed for the elevators.
"Hey, Dix?" a voice called out behind her.
The pretty head nurse spun around in time to see her favorite paramedic duo heading towards her.
"You wouldn't happen to know how Beverly's doin', would ya?" Johnny asked.
"I promised to check on her before I headed home." She jerked her head in the direction of the elevators. "Care to join me?"
Roy held up the handy talkie. "As long as the tones will let us."
As soon as the elevator doors closed, Johnny asked the question everyone had been wondering all afternoon. "Um… I know you can't actually tell us, Dix, but… can you give us a hint. I mean… Is she…?"
Roy raised his eyebrows at the brazenness of his partner, but he was glad the question had been raised. They had all hoped that Marco would call them at the station, but he hadn't, and this was the first chance they had had to actually stop by and check on the two of them.
"Well, Johnny… You're right, I can't…," she turned around to face the doors, leaving the two paramedics staring at each other behind her. "But I wouldn't plan on smoking any cigars any time soon." The clever nurse smiled to herself, knowing she had relayed the message without officially violating any rules of confidentiality.
Johnny leaned his back against the cold panel of the elevator, blowing out his cheeks in relief. At least Marco wasn't going to be faced with an unplanned pregnancy. He just hoped the two of them could work through their problems. He didn't like seeing his shiftmates upset over anything, especially not personal matters. It could easily take their attention off the job at hand, and that could endanger the citizens of LA County, and the rest of the men on shift.
When the elevator doors opened, the three of them exited, heading in the direction of room 402. The paramedics slowed down as Dixie eased up to the door, turning her head to the side to listen. She didn't hear any talking inside, so she turned to her two friends. "Let's keep it down, fellas. I think she's sleeping."
Dixie gave a gentle knock on the door. When there was no response, she pushed the door open just enough to peer inside. What she saw warmed her heart. She leaned back, allowing the two men to get a glimpse of the hospital bed.
There, asleep in the bed, were both Beverly and Marco. They looked peaceful and comfortable in each other's arms. Both men stepped back, allowing the door to slowly shut, wistful smiles on their faces.
"That's a sight for sore eyes," Roy commented, remembering how he had done the same thing with Joanne after Jennifer had been born. The labor and delivery had been difficult, and more than anything, he wanted to bear some of the pain for her, but she had told him later on that the most wonderful thing he could have done for her afterwards was to hold her while she slept. And he knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Marco and Beverly were going to be okay.
He looked over at his partner, seeing the dark eyes he knew so well, locked in a thousand-mile stare. "Earth to Johnny," he said, tapping Johnny's elbow with the back of his hand.
"Hmm?"
Dixie shook her head, grinning. Maybe things were about to return to normal for the men of Station 51. There seemed to be just one major hurdle left – Johnny's deposition. And she wondered if Johnny's faraway look was because of his upcoming trip to Selma, or if the scene between Marco and Beverly was reminding him of a certain young lady who had returned from Tehachapi with him.
"I'll catch you guys next shift," she commented, then grimaced. "I'm sorry, John. You said you wouldn't be here. I hope everything goes well for you down south."
"Thanks, Dix. So do I."
As the trio walked back to the elevators, the radio alerted them to an incoming call.
"Squad 51, stand by for a response," came the voice of Sam Lanier.
"Well, looks like we're headin' back out there," Johnny said, offering Dixie a brief smile.
"We better take the stairs," Roy said, ushering his partner towards the stairwell.
"Yea, I know. Catch ya later, Dix."
"Be safe," she called out as she pushed the down button. Yes, maybe life would soon return to normal for the firemen she loved like brothers.
E!
As the first streaks of the new day began to appear in the skies above Los Angeles County, Marco was awakened by the soft stirrings of Beverly. He stretched his legs, forcing his eyes open. When he saw her eyes flutter open, he greeted her with a smile.
"Good morning," he whispered.
"Hey," she said, turning her head awkwardly, trying to see him around the swelling in her left eye and cheek. "Um… bathroom."
"Figured you might need to go. That's your third bag," he said, nodding his head towards the IV pole. "Let me help you get up."
"I can't believe you stayed with me… after I…"
"Sshhh," Marco said, hushing her ruminations. "People who love each other stick together… in sickness and in health."
After she had taken care of her most pressing need, she washed her hands, grimacing when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. It was the first time in years that battered face was reflected back at her. She finger-combed her hair, tucking the stray strands away to improve her appearance as much as she could.
Marco helped her get back into bed, tucking her in. "I'm glad you agreed to stay at Mama's house for the next few days."
"I appreciate the offer."
"She loves you, Bev. We all do."
Beverly blushed, pulling the blanket up around her chin. "I love you and your family, Marco. More than you, or they, could ever know."
Marco winked at her. "We know."
E!
At station 51, the men pulled themselves out of bed in response to the wake up tones. Hank acknowledged LA, then snapped his suspenders into place and followed his men towards the kitchen in search of coffee, surprised when he saw his junior medic had already made morning coffee.
"John?"
"Yea, Cap?" Johnny replied, pouring several cups of coffee.
"What are you doing up so early?"
Johnny shrugged his shoulders, passing the coffee cups to the men who lumbered past him. "Got a lot on my mind. Figured I'd make us some coffee since I couldn't sleep."
Mike patted Johnny on his shoulder, accepting a proffered cup. "Our thoughts will go with you, Johnny."
"Thanks, Mike."
"Do you need a ride to the airport?" Roy asked.
"Naw, I'll just be gone a couple o' days. It won't cost me that much to park the Rover at LAX," he replied, pulling out his chair and taking a seat. "I, uh, I want to thank all you fellas for what you did for me at Tehachapi. I," he looked down into the dark cup of coffee. "I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you fellas."
"I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you," Chet said.
"You were there for Becca and me, too." Hank tipped his head in Johnny's direction.
"And you probably saved my marriage," Roy added.
"And helped save my reputation," Mike spoke up.
"Aww, c'mon, fellas. We're always there for each other, right?" Johnny commented, uncomfortable with the praises he was receiving.
"That's right," Hank said. "And if you need anything… ANYTHING, you'll call one of us, won't you?"
Johnny nodded, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Yea… Yea, I promise."
Chet couldn't stand the current display of emotions. "Gage, you're gonna by flyin' over New Mexico, right?"
A couple of stifled snickers were heard around the kitchen table.
"Yea," Johnny replied, allowing his crooked grin to make an appearance as soon as he realized where his nemesis was heading with his comment. "But don't worry, Kelly. I won't let the aliens get me," he said, leaning back and propping his elbow on the back of the chair he was sitting in. "But as I'm soaring over Area 51," he said, using his hand to mimic an airplane in flight. "I might just send 'em back here to snatch the Phantom."
Chet turned to his side, his back to Johnny as he addressed the rest of the smiling men. He knew they had all needed a little comedic relief, and he was glad to be the one to provide it.
"John Gage - the only man on earth who admits he communicates with little green men."
Johnny chuckled, standing up so that he could tower over the Irishman. "And you, Chester B. Kelly, are the only man on earth who admits he believes in 'em."
"It's because they're the same height," Mike deadpanned, causing the entire room to erupt in howling laughter.
E!