The shrill ringing from the phone pulled me out of my dream and brought me back to reality. From the backlit screen, I could see the caller's name; Nazz. Kevin, who was still sitting closer to me and staring at the phone in horror, was still with Nazz. She was his girlfriend since my adolescents, and I was nothing and nobody to him, just a childhood nuisance who he happened to get to know because of sick twist of fate. He was mocking me just a few days ago, I was nothing to him. It suddenly didn't matter, any of the time we spent or any of the words he said; it didn't matter.

I sat away from him and coughed into my fist. My knuckles were white from the pressure, my throat was dry with fury. This wasn't going to happen.

His phone stopped ringing, pulling him out of his day-mare, and suddenly he acknowledged me.

"Double D" he began.

"You should have picked that up" I said through gritted teeth, my voice shaking with emotion. I cursed my transparency, but I resented my weakness even more. How could I be so foolish!

"Double D, I"

"No, Kevin" I said, now fighting tears. Why was he saying my name? Why did he look sad? He had a girlfriend, he was perfect, and he had nothing to worry about. He didn't look like a fool.

I stood up, I had had enough! I made my way swiftly to the door, moving my feet as fast as possible. It was beginning to get claustrophobic in the room, I needed out. I reached to the door handle, but I never made it there because I found myself pinned to the wall, Kevin's face inches from mine.

We were both panting; he looked as bewildered as I felt.

"Kevin, let me go" I said, grabbing him by the shoulders and attempting to push him away, but despite all my effort, he was much stronger than me. He stared at me with determination, and if anything my pushing made him press himself against me more.

"Double D, I can't do that"

"Kevin!" I yelped, my anger returning. I felt enclosed, there was no space between the two of us; I couldn't believe he was doing this to me. Imposing himself on me. It was infuriating.

"Kevin, let me go right now!" I screamed, trying to push against him again but failing miserably. This was torture!

I tried to shout again, but Kevin stopped me mid sentence. He was fully pressed against me with his face touching mine. He leaned in, attempting to kiss me.

"No, don't you dare" I whispered, turning my face away. The wall was cold against my face, consoling me.

I felt strong fingers on my chin, turning my face towards his. He tried again, but I placed my hand over my lips and closed me eyes. He stepped back with a sigh.

"I thought you-"

"Yes, you thought right, but I'm not that sort of person Kevin" I snapped, opening my eyes and opening the door. He wouldn't try anything now that he could easily be caught.

"You are with Nazz, and I am not going to come between that. I was wrong to expose my feelings to you, I am so sorry, but I am not going to act upon my feelings when you belong to someone else"

"I don't belong to her" he retorted, his face twisting angrily.

"Yes you do! You made a commitment, you do belong to her" I growled. I left as soon as I finished speaking, I was not going to engage him any longer. I wasn't going to entangle myself into that mess, I knew it would never work.

Kevin sat at the bus station, staring impatiently at his watch. Rolf was always late, literally always. But his visits were always welcomed; his simple, broken mannerisms always brought a smile to Kevin's face, something he really needed to do right now.

Kevin could not stop thinking about that night with Double D. It was unexpected. But it was also devastating. Kevin preferred to be honest with himself, and he knew that he had feelings, strong feelings, for him. It had taken him a while to realize it, it was a slow process, but it had happened. As much it drove him mad, he knew Double D was right, he couldn't have both him and Nazz.

How could he choose?

Kevin sighed.

"Casanova Kevin-boy! Your face is that of someone who has been infected with a parasite of the bowel? Have you been eating spoiled radishes?" Rolf interjected Kevin's thoughts with his curious proverbial language. Kevin already broke into a smile.

"Good to see you man!" Kevin said, as Rolf and himself exchanged a half hug. Kevin flinched as Rolf hit his back very hard, but the manly gesture was appreciated. They began to make their way to their favourite hangout in the woods with a bottle of vodka. Rolf always had a homebrewed vodka made from turnips. They spent their final years of high school drinking a bottle every Friday evening as they watched obscure foreign shows on Rolf's tiny screen. When Kevin moved to university, they moved into the surrounding wooded area, which was pretty much as empty and private at Rolf's house. It was a suitable substitute.

They sat beneath an oak tree, both using their coats as a guard from the wet undergrowth. It was getting warmer as spring came around, but it was also very wet. Kevin always felt that the weather matched his mood; rainy and overcast when he felt sad and gloomy. He frowned at the ground.

"Kevin-boy, care to dictate you thoughts?" Rolf said, taking a swig of his alcohol and not even flinching. He drank it like water.

Kevin took the bottle from Rolf and took a large gulp, wincing as the high alcohol content burned his innards. It was a welcome sensation.

"A lot's been going on man" Kevin said, taking a second swig immediately after.

"I can see" Rolf began, taking the bottle back defiantly. This made Kevin giggle.

"The basketball team at my university is weak in comparison to the tag team you and me were, it is like comparing the potatoes of a commoner to those grown by the son of a shepherd, not the same" Rolf rambled between sips.

The bottle passed between their hands as they discussed their sporting activities in their respective university lives. By the time that conversation ended, the bottle was empty and placed back into Rolf's rucksack, not one to litter.

"Now, Football-jock boy Kevin, tell the Wolf slayer what is really burdening your mind like the load on the mule's back" Rolf said, as articulate as ever despite the intoxication.

Kevin was leaning heavily against the tree, his vision swimming and his thoughts in disarray.

"Rolf, let's say, that ummmm… you had a girlfriend"

"A hand maiden who willingly came with me, yes" Rolf mused. Kevin giggled.

"Anyway, hypothetically speaking you had girl, but you met someone else who you liked too"

"I would choose the second maiden"

"Yeah, but what if the other person- maiden- was actually a dude" Kevin flinched, but he had to say it, he had to do it.

Rolf sat quietly for a while, his dark eyes darting around the forest before settling heavily on Kevin.

"I would still choose the second, Kev-boy" he said quietly.

"It doesn't matter that it's another guy?" Kevin whimpered.

"No"

They sat there in their own drunk thoughts, Rolf staring at the foliage with thoughts of camping and Kevin filled with thoughts of another man. Both had smiles on their faces, both wanted to take action.

Rolf waved Kevin goodbye as he began to set up his camp site, watching as Kevin rushed to change his destiny.

"You better have my article ready by the end of next week, Double D" Lee Kanker shouted from across the room. I stared at her angrily and said, "It shouldn't be too hard to write, there's not much to say"

She didn't pick up on my pointed tone and continued to shout at everyone else in the room. In the corner of my eye, I could see a fiery red head stare at me in confusion. When the meeting finally ended, Jessica sat beside me, her face full of concern.

"You ok squirrel?" she asked, petting me gently. I turned to her and whispered, "Jess, I'm heartbroken"

Both our faces filled with sorrow at my admission, and she proceeded to hug me. The room was now empty, so Jess proceeded to interrogate me,

"Who?"

I pursed my lips, I had refused to utter his name for a few days now, "Kevin"

Her eyes widened in shock, she looked as though I had just told her I killed a man, though both were deserving of her reaction.

"No"

"Affirmative"

"Holy shit balls" she paused, "so what happened?"

"I-"

My speech was cut off by the appearance of a figure at the door. His eyes were hooded, his lips were parted, his shoulders were heaving.

Jess followed my gaze and her eyes widened at the vision that was Kevin. She stood up.

"No, what are you doing?!" I whispered angrily. She ignored me and gathered her belongings, jetting for the door, and nodding to Kevin as she left. Kevin smiled at her gesture and closed the door behind him.

We were now alone, staring each other down.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, turning to my paper work.

"I broke up with Nazz" Kevin said.

I stopped what I was doing and stared at him, "What?"

"I said" Kevin began, walking towards me and continuing only after he stopped beside my chair, "I am not with Nazz anymore"

I stared at him, blinking furiously. He swiftly pulled me out of the chair and close to him.

"Why?" I said, my breath hitching as I felt one of his hands run down my back.

"Because I can't be with you if I'm with her" he said, pressing his forehead against mine. His eyes were closed, his breathing was laboured, and he smelled heavily of alcohol. I closed my eyes and pressed my lips against his, not wanting to wait any longer.

We stood there, our arms around each other, lips pressed, and our bodies applying needy pressure to one another. My heart was pounding in my ears, as the blood coursed ferociously through my body. I took my hand away from my side and placed it on Kevin's chest. He pulled back and stared down at my face, his lips pulled down slightly. I felt his heart pounding as viciously as my own and I smiled up at him. His smile returned.

"Nervous, are we Kevin?" I giggled.

"You're one to talk, Princess" Kevin smiled. I turned my face away in embarrassment, but felt warm rough fingers apply pressure on my chin.

"Why do you always turn away from me?" he asked, his voice rough with anxiety.

"I don't know" I admitted.

He cupped his hands around my face and smiled down at me, "It's kinda weird, but I like your face"

I laughed and replied, "It's not weird, it's endearing"

He leaned in and pressed his lips against mine, holding it for a moment before parting my lips into an open mouthed kiss. His tongue was soft and gentle, caressing my own with subtle need and desire. I would have thought about the exchange of germs and saliva, however, I had spent too long wishing for this to happen.

Kevin pulled away and grabbed me into his arms, so I was cradled against him like a baby. He pulled out my chair and sat on it so that I was now on his lap. He placed his head on my chest and rubbed his cheek there. I put my arms around his neck and squeezed him slightly, sure that I didn't even have the strength to hurt him.

We sat there in silence for what seemed like an eternity, each lost in our own thoughts. I felt my heart increase as my thoughts turned negative; was he regretting it?

"Is something wrong?" he asked, probably noticing the increase in my heart rate. I pulled back to look at his face.

"I am worried. I don't know why this is happening, Kevin… It's so unexpected that I'm sure it's not real" I said, feeling myself tear up. I was never very good with strong emotions, and I was getting overwhelmed. Kevin saw the genuine panic that was quickly taking over my features. He pushed me off his lap and moved to lay on the ground, tapping the space beside him. I sat down on the floor and looked down at his thoughtful features as he stared at me. He pulled me down roughly and rolled over so he was now lying on top of me, one hand on either said of my head.

"Listen to me" he began, his voice rough with emotion, "I don't think… you understand how much you mean to me. I know what you mean… it's so unexpected but… it feels right Double D. I literally have never felt so comfortable with someone before, you're funny, and smart and caring and you make me feel good. It's real, Double D, I don't know about you, but how I feel is so real, I can barely breathe from how much I love you…"

Silence.

His eyes were wide with shock, and as were mine. I pushed him slightly so I was no longer pinned to the ground and could sit up. He had turned away, scratching the back of his head, his face a mask of embarrassment.

"I love you too" I whispered, pressing my lips to his cheek. He turned his head so our lips could meet, and we began to kiss deeply, running out hands along each other's bodies. I rubbed his shoulders feeling the muscles beneath tense with emotion, and he ran his hands along my back and cupped my bottom. I gasped, but he only deepened the kiss completely distracting me from my engulfed behind.

I pulled of his hat and felt his soft hair beneath my fingers; he giggled against my lips, his own lips curving into a smile. He attempted to touch my beanie, but I immediately pulled away from him with a scowl.

"What's the matter, I already know Double D" he said, reaching for my head. I grabbed his hand mid motion and held it in the air.

"That doesn't mean I'm comfortable Kevin" I said, frowning deeply. He looked at me gently and said, "Double D, there are some people damaged on the inside. This is not ugly, those people are. I don't care"

I watched him pull of my hat and lean in to kiss my scalp. The skin was sensitive and his kiss sent shivers down my spine. He found my lips and continued to kiss me, pulling away only to say, "I'm kinda horny"

"Not today Kevin"

I hope this made up for my absence :3