Hey everyone!

Thank you so much for your reviews they mean so much! I can't believe I already have a new chapter, I wrote it so quickly! However, it is a bit shorter than the last one and more serious.

I have given this chapter a suicide trigger warning as there is a lot of discussion about it.

Rated M: strong language, discussion of suicide.

Again, constructive criticism is welcome.

Enjoy!

Chapter Four

"You were a priest in a past life?"

Godric shook his head.

"You like to hang out in churches?"

Another shake of his head.

"You… accidentally fell into a portal that magically led you to the basement of this church?"

He levelled me with a flat look.

"Oohh, I know! You're from the future and you were sent back in time to prevent a disaster implemented by an evil organisation that changes the world forever; the Fellowship of the Sun is that organisation and they're trying to stop you!"

Godric gives an exceptional stop-bullshitting-me face, I am, quite frankly, very impressed. I have been on the receiving end of that look all my life but no one has ever been able to nail it the way Godric does. It makes me wonder if there is someone in his life who has caused him to perfect it.

I sighed dramatically and fell back onto the floor. "This isn't fair! You're impossible to read," I whined, pouting up at him. "Can you give me one teeny weeny little hint?"

He smiled at my theatrics but gave another shake of his head, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

I huffed and spent a few more minutes sulking on the floor. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if I lost? Godric is beautiful and has been around for a long time; I bet a kiss from him would be like nothing I had ever experienced before – it definitely wouldn't be a bad thing. But, on the other hand, I couldn't let him win – my pride just cannot take that, especially after boasting so much. To be honest, if I win, I might just kiss him anyway because I do not want to miss out on this golden opportunity.

I sat up with a renewed determination. "Alright, Godric, prepare yourself – I'm taking out the big guns."

He just continued to eye me with amusement.

"Ok, how would my mom do this?" I pondered, racking my brain. I imagined her standing in front of me, a stern look on her face as she coached me through deciphering evidence. When I was little, she had really wanted me to become a cop, just like her.

So, first she would establish what we did know. Fact: Godric is locked up in the basement of the Fellowship of the Sun. Fact: he is very strong and it would be almost physically impossible for them to kidnap him. He had also told me himself that they had not kidnapped him, which further supports the facts I have established. Putting all this information together can only lead to one answer: he wanted to be here.

I stared up at him in shock. "You're here of your own free will," I whispered, "you want to be here."

I was horrified – why would he want to be here? These people were awful and full of hate – they probably had some terrible, deluded things planned for him and he was just- just - chilling in the basement.

Godric's lips parted in shock. He stared at me, something old and dark that I couldn't identify burning in his eyes. He seemed to take a moment to steady himself before his blank mask fell into place. "That does not explain why I am here. That was our bet." His voice was calm, serene, like he hadn't been a vortex of swirling emotions moments before. I was surprised he had let me see them considering I'm a complete stranger, and a human at that.

I eyed him through narrowed eyes. Why was he here? There were a multitude of possible reasons as to why he was here and I had just spent three hours going through them all and getting nowhere. I needed a new angle, instead of looking at why Godric wanted to be here, I should instead look at why the Fellowship of the Sun would want him here.

As I had established previously, it can't be for anything good. The Fellowship can only want two things from a vampire: to punish them or to receive some sort admission of guilt or penance from them. This had to be a very big deal for the Fellowship, while they had a lot of support; they were still only a fringe group and were considered too extreme for most Christians. They needed to make an event out of Godric, probably in an attempt to gather as much media coverage as they could. I suspected that this would rule out punishing Godric - hurting an unwillingly participant would be slated by the media, and I doubt they would be able to force any vampire to do something against their will, let alone a vampire as strong as Godric claimed to be. But, what would look good in the eyes of the media and what would bring in masses of support is a vampire willingly subjecting themselves to the Fellowship's punishment and admitting that vampires were wrong.

And then it clicked. The dark look in Godric's eyes, the Fellowship's willingness to let him in the basement, why he was even here.

"You want to die."

What had started out as a fun bet to distract myself had quickly turned into a nightmare. I didn't want him to die – I had never met anyone as gentle or kind as him, human or otherwise. It felt like there was something blocking my throat and I could feel tears well up in my eyes, which was ridiculous – I barely knew him. Why was I so bothered? Was it because he was my only companion in this hellish cage? Was it because he had been kind to me in my hour of need? Or was it simply because he seemed too good to die, like he doesn't deserve it. Was it a mixture of all three?

He knew the moment I had figured it out – I hadn't needed to open my mouth, he was already on the other side of the room, engulfed by the darkness and hiding his face in the shadows so I couldn't try see what he was feeling.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Why do you care?" His voice was still eerily calm, like before, as though we were discussing the weather and not his planned suicide.

I read this quote once, a few years ago, I can't remember where its from but for some reason it has always stuck with me, it went something along the lines of: "suicidal people don't want to die; they want to start living."

I'm not sure if this could be applied to vampires who were far older and far wiser than me but I was going to goddamn well try. This wasn't the first time I had talked down a suicidal person and it probably won't be the last – fire fighters often have to do it if a cop isn't available.

"I care because you are good and have been kind – you don't appear to deserve this. All life is important and it would be a tragic waste if you were to die. Its my job to save people – I can't just sit back and let you die without at least trying to help you – its my duty as a fire fighter and my duty as a person."

He laughed humourlessly and I felt a chill run up my spine – it wasn't intended to be threatening but it was scary all the same. "I am not kind and I am certainly not good; I have committed many unforgivable sins in my long life – I do not deserve to live. I look at this world and all I see is darkness and hatred; vampires take and take and take while giving nothing back. We torture people for fun and we do not care who we hurt. When we kill we feel nothing. I do not want to stay in a world so corrupted by darkness."

Well shit, this was so much worse than I thought.

"Dude," he blinked at the term, "you are wrong for so many reasons and I don't even know where to begin."

He looked surprised, like no one has ever spoken to him like that before which shocks me, considering how wrong he is.

"First of all, even if everything you said was true and even if you are right – this is not the right way to go about committing suicide. You are fuelling a movement of hatred and intolerance and essentially telling them that they are right. And its not just you that this effects. By doing this they are gaining momentum and their messages of homophobia, racism, sexism and basically everything wrong with humanity will start reaching more people. Also, what about new vampires? Created after you guys "came out the coffin" or whatever? By supporting this group you are telling them that they are monsters – you are telling their families that they are monsters and vampires who may well have turned out to be kind and considerate may well become the monsters you claimed they are just because that's the only identity ascribed to them." The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. For someone so supposedly wise, he was being really fucking dumb.

"I—" he tried to interrupt.

"Sh, I'm not finished yet! The fact is – you are wrong, you are not right. I may not know anything about vampires but I do know not all of them are as awful as you say they are. That vampire I rescued? Her friends all risked their lives trying to go back and save her and if they hadn't told us she was still in the building, she would have died there. They risked burning alive in the sun for that. And even if vampires are as awful and evil as you say they are, don't you have a responsibility, as one of them, to change that? You can't just look around you and see how awful everything is and go, oh, well, that's it for me, better pack it in then." I was in full-blown rant mode now and nothing was stopping me. "To be very cliché here, be the change you want to see in the world."

"Are you done yet?"

"No," I snapped. "If you have done terrible things in your life you have a responsibility to make up for it, especially if other members of your community are continuing them – you can't just decide to back out and leave the mess you helped create for others to clean up. And lastly, do you not have anyone in your life that would miss you? Or be devastated by your death? Don't you at least owe them a goodbye?"

"What makes you think I did not say my farewells?"

"Because you're here. I don't think other vampires would think this is a good idea. If you have felt this way for along time, you should have at least sought help before deciding to end it, especially with no explanation or goodbye to your loved ones."

We descended into silence. I was wondering if I had been overly harsh, I was putting on a bit of an indignant front in the hopes that it was the kind of message he needed to hear – I was praying I hadn't majorly fucked up. I have no idea what Godric was thinking but its probably something along the lines of wow, Milia was right, I am acting like an idiot and should thank her for her great insight! OK, probably not, but a girl could dream.

I was shocked that he had just sat there and listened to my really insulting speech, I mean, I hadn't held back any punches. He had just sat tin his dark corner, saying nothing. Oh my god, what if I have just deeply insulted him and he is too hurt to say anything? Do I apologise or wait for him to say something? I think I will wait (shut up, I'm not being a chicken).

For the next hour, as sunlight slowly started to trickle into the room, touching us with warmth and bathing us in an orange glow, I mentally debated with myself on whether or not to apologise. Why hasn't he said anything yet? Was he a sore loser and didn't want to admit that he had lost the bet? Wait, no, that was a stupid thought, ignore that. God, I am going to have be a responsible adult and initiate conversation to apologise. I hate myself – why did I ever make this stupid bet in the first place?

I awkwardly cleared my throat. His head snapped up to look at me and I realised he must have forgotten I was even there.

"Look, Godric. I'm really sorry." My voice was scratchy from lack of use. " I have overstepped here and forced myself into your private thoughts and affairs when I shouldn't have. I am sorry for the things I said."

He gave a soft smile. "Don't be."

What? "What?"

"You were mostly right – I was avoiding my problems. I do have a responsibility to right my wrongs and to the people who love me. However, you were presumptuous; you do not know vampires or how we think – I still stand by what I said. I have thought over your words, and, while you do have good points, I have not changed my mind. In two nights time, I shall meet the sun."

Well shit.

So sorry about all the cliffhangers, guys!

Next chapter will be a bit more fun and a bit longer. Plus, we will finally get to meet Sookie!