Um, so maybe I will be SUPER amazing, and give you 3 chapters tonight?
Chapter 44
Tony's eyebrow cruised up his temple the longer he scanned the shelves to the fridge. He hummed, then harrumphed, and, finding nothing of what he looked for, straightened and stared at the two women who watched him. Natasha sat on the bar stool to the left, chewing on left over quesadillas. On the right Pepper munched down a pickle, a taco, and three rice crispy treats.
"So if I ask where my left over Mexican went, I can just stop at the pregnant women?" he asked, rather rhetorically.
"I would have been fine with snap peas, deep fried Oreos, and half a container of pistachio ice cream but we didn't have that," Pepper said matter-of-factly.
"All I want is steamed broccoli, cheese, fruit roll ups, steak –no, filet mignon—and a tub of pecan butter cream." Natasha shrugged as if the request had been completely normal.
Tony, however, simply stared at them blankly.
"Why did you say steak? Now I want steak! I'm trying not to eat meat and this coffee thing is killing me! Maybe I should just drink caffeine again. Do you think that will give little Bartholomew a weird face?" Pepper swallowed another bite of her tacos.
Tony pointed to the plate. "Um, there's meat in that—"
"Don't be silly, Tony, I scraped it off and stuck tofu inside," Pepper dismissed him with a wave and returned to her conversation with Natasha. "I mean, half the internet says no caffeine, the other half says that vegetarians have weird tasting breast milk. I'm not planning to taste it. What are you doing?"
"And we are not naming him Bartholomew." Tony interjected.
"I want steak. I'm eating steak. Like, now. I want steak right now." Natasha dropped her food onto her place. "And now I want a coffee too. But not just any coffee, I want a double shot Frappuccino from that Caribou place on 86th. The one across from Steve's old apartment? And a slice of pizza from that shop next door, by the dog park."
Pepper's eyes widened. "Onion, pepper, avocado white pizza with broccoli?"
"And a steak."
Instantly the two women dropped their food, and took off to collect their traveling items. Tony stood over the wreckage of their forgotten lunch and wondered whether any of it might be salvageable for himself. Natasha ate the insides of his quesadillas and left the outer rim of breading. Pepper turned hers into a tofu taco. None of the rest looked particularly edible for mortal men. He sighed dejectedly and wondered whether it might be better off to hop in the car with the girls.
"After the pizza place, we'll head down to the pretzel shop on the west end. Peter Parker's always in there, so you go inside and get me the mini bites with extra honey mustard and a pack of cheddar cheese. We can eat at the patio by Sacs and get Ice Cream at Giuseppe's."
"I think we should just by the gallon."
"You're right. Gallon."
Tony listened as the two pregnant women formulated their game plane for attacking the city's food supply on their way to the elevator. He decided it might be better if he stuck to his place and out of their firing line.
:(:):(:):
"Pancake mix."
"Aunt Jemima only, not that off brand. I don't like the off-brand."
"And syrup. I want the buttery kind. Extra butter."
"And I want the sugar-free strawberry. Don't forget the dill pickles. I want baby, kosher, Vlasic, dill pickles. Not the sweet ones."
"I want the sweet pickles, the long ones that are sandwich slices. I don't care what brand. And I want Peter Pan peanut butter, chunky, with Ritz circle crackers, the buttery kind. And I want fruit roll ups. Better buy the big box."
Steve, Bruce, Thor, and Tony all stood in front of Natasha and Pepper like a military assembly. Natasha relaxed along the couch, her swollen feet propped up on the armrest. Pepper took up Tony's chair, she had three ice packs arranged over most of her extremities and a pair of headphones stretched across the new bulge in her belly. Little "Caesar Antoine" Stark was beginning his classical music education with Bach.
The men briefly considered whether or not they should simply avoid any potential heartache and invite the girls to come along. The last time they attempted such a feat, they returned to the Tower with a whole host of inedible items for the general population of non-pregnant individuals. The men dined on anchovies and pecan ice cream for almost three days before they broke down a planned a shopping trip for themselves.
Thor, having little idea of any such items, glanced at the three others beside him. "I think I may best assist by remaining with the car."
"On second thought, we better keep Thor." Pepper decided suddenly. "I like his massages. I think I need one. Besides, you aren't supposed to be walking around on that leg yet."
Tony pointed at Thor's absent cane. "He's been walking on it for two weeks!"
"And we think he needs to keep on resting it!" Natasha argued. "What? Can't three of you handle this? What's the big deal? It's a shopping list. I'm growing a human being in my body and all you three need to do is—"
Tony lifted his hands in supplication to stem the raging hormones and hurriedly scurried away with Banner and Steve scooting off ahead of him. If they had any rational sense, they would not come home with the wrong type of pickles.
:(:):(:):
"Aldrich."
"As in your weird ex who attempted to murder me and kidnapped you? No."
"Ambrose."
"Isn't that some nasty type of dessert?"
"No, that's ambrosia."
"Still, no."
"Brindley."
"Where are you even finding these names?!" Tony shot forward from his seat and spied over Pepper's shoulder at the computer screen. "Preppy baby names? Pepper, we want a smart kid, not a psychotic future crime lord."
Pepper gave him a withering look. "We are not naming him Ozzy."
"Still circling the wagons?" Steve asked, stepping into the living room. Since Tony learned the sex of the baby, Pepper and he had gone over and over the same argument. What to name the baby. For Pepper, a name held every possibility in the world. For Tony, it was a stepping stone until he came up with his own nickname. Like Iron Lad. Watching them go back and forth day by day had become increasingly entertaining. Natasha observed from her procured arm chair. A plate of spaghetti balanced on her growing belly. Her baby-naming days were over.
"Just name him Hank," the Black Widow said, winking in Steve's direction.
"Hank and Henry?" Tony asked, "That's terrible. I'm already planning to call your kid Hank."
"Your kid," Natasha corrected, skewering a meatball.
That was a conversation they always let pass. In some part of the Avenger's minds, they hoped Natasha might decide to keep Clint and her only child. At first Pepper wasn't sure how to feel about setting her sights on raising two babies, then losing one when Natasha's mind did change. Tony and she discussed it late one night should just such the time occur. They were prepared for anything. As of now, Natasha remained steadfastly against motherhood. She dejectedly watched her weight increase, her stomach pouch out, and endured only two other ultrasounds following the first. The Widow had agreed on Castillo as a primary care doctor, however, and that alone became a step in the right direction.
Bruce spent the majority of his time at the Tower, but with the deliveries only a month away he'd taken more stringent hours at the hospital and his classes. Princeton accepted him back instantly, despite his time constraints. Any university in the world would take the great hero of the Galactus War, the man who single handedly finished the equations to send the Bethlehem Star into the sky. It was easy for them to forget the influence of the Sarhorns.
After teaming up with Dr. Castillo and his old mentor, Dr. Lindsey, Bruce took every night shift available in Mercy Hope's maternity ward. He had his crash course in labor and delivery, even jumping in on multiple C-sections to better his own comfort at the future rushing toward them. While he would never agree to be the sole man in charge the day Pepper or Natasha decided to pop, he planned to at least be the level-headed one in the group. Fortunately, Lindsey trusted him as an experienced physician.
"Homer."
"No."
"Sebastian."
"No."
"Cory."
"No."
"Brant."
"No."
Rogers headed into the kitchen and poured himself a bowl of cereal. He didn't dare touch the left over spaghetti Natasha had deigned to make for herself. She'd gotten used to his cooking lately, subpar as it was. Part of her even pretended to enjoy it. While nothing Steve did made up for the fact that Clint was not around to do all of those things he'd taken on himself, it eased his mind to be that support in Clint's place. After their heart-to-heart a few months ago, Natasha nearly refused to accept any more of his kind gestures, but Steve could be persuasive, when he wanted to be. In some ways his attention became his penance. How things might change when the baby came, he didn't rightly know. He owed an answer to himself on that exact point, and also to Sif. For now, she waited for his grief to subside. Asgardians could take months, years to mourn their dead. It was refreshing to have time to make up his mind.
"You know, Steve is a wonderful, strong, manly name," he pipped in.
Both Natasha and Tony turned to their friend and echoed, "No."
"I have heard a great many children following this war will be named Thor," the Asgardian stated. He stood at Pepper's back, massaging her shoulders. It became his duty the minute the women realized his incredible gift for working out knotted muscles. Years of living together and all this time, they had missed out.
"Good for them. I am not having mini Thor and Hank," Tony said. "I think—"
"AC for a first name and DC for a middle name is not happening while I am the one carrying this baby."
"You will give birth before we have a name for this baby."
From his own armchair, Bruce thumbed through a copy of "What to Expect When You're Expecting". He had contributed little to the conversation thus far, instead engrossing himself on the peculiarities of cravings, expected weight gain, and such of the like. Without really bothering to removed his nose from the book, he added his own take, "When I legally changed my name to Bruce, I didn't want to be one of those people without a middle name. So I picked one."
Natasha set her fork down to focus her attention on him. Now that the topic presented itself, she had to admit not knowing Bruce's middle name at all. She raked her memory, recalling files and old field reports but all the while drew blank after blank. She'd always assumed he simply didn't have one. "Let me guess. Bruce Thor Banner?"
He laughed, thumbed through another page, one with an apparent sideways illustration for her turned the book a full ninety degrees to scrutinize it. "In fact, no. I wanted something different from my family. I grabbed a phone book, flipped through all the pages and just shot-gunned a name right out of the middle. I picked Ben. I thought it was funny to have all B's. I never got a B on anything in my life but I had to write it down every time I did a test or graded something. B, B, B. I thought it was funny at the time."
Tony leaned forward with his elbow on his knee. "You named yourself Bruce Ben Banner?"
The scientist shrugged. "I thought I was being clever."
"I like Ben," Natasha said, returning to her second dinner.
"I do too. Benjamin." Pepper tested the word, thinking what it might be like to say it, day in and day out. "Benjamin Stark."
"I like it if you like it," Tony acquiesced. He didn't mind naming a child after his best friend, especially after all they'd done for each other in the years. "Better call the Thing. Don't want him getting any ideas of us naming a baby after him."
DAW!
So there they are, kids! Henry Barton and Benjamin Stark! OH the kind of boys they'll be!