So then Sammer time. (I'm so sorry for those of you who get this. I apologize profusely.) Also this might be a little angsty, so be warned. I hope you like it though.
Disclaimer: Nope, still not mine.
Sam was at his desk where he was trying to work out what was going through his brother's mind when he got the email from the Queen. Reading it he just sighed. He knew he had to talk to Dean, but talking to Dean was not an easy thing to accomplish. With that thought he pulled out his phone and sent quick text to Dean asking him over for dinner and beer tonight. He would just have to get through to that thick headed idiot.
Dean was sitting at his desk thinking over the previous night. He thought it had gone better than any of his other meetings with Cas had. He felt that maybe they could be friends. I mean he and Cas got on really well, they liked the same stuff (yeah like each other for instance) and he thought they understood each other. He could be friends with the guy. Though he really wanted so much more, not that he thought that Cas did, or that he was single for that matter, but still. At least he hadn't been a dick when he was with him and Charlie was there. Okay he may not have flirted with the guy or anything but he was getting better. Though he was still worried about whether he could really go through with the idea of being with him. I mean he would have to tell everyone he was…and that just wasn't something he truly thought he could do. Even for Cas. It was hard enough saying the words to Sam, he couldn't imagine saying them to his friends from work. But he really wanted to be with Cas.
He was pulled out of his thoughts by his phone going and Sam asking him round his place for dinner that night. Thinking about it Dean realised he had never got his 'talk' with his little brother. Maybe they could discuss it tonight? He didn't mind if Jess was there he knew Sam would have told her everything anyway. With these thoughts he send back a quick yes before he could change his mind and resolutely put any thoughts of Castiel Novak from his mind and concentrated on his work. Or at least he tried to, with limited success. (Yeah, I bet.)
Sam, Jess and Dean had had a nice dinner, talking about inconsequential things. Sam knew better than try to get between Dean and food. But now Sam and Dean were sitting having a beer in the livingroom and Jess had made herself scarce.
"So Dean. What's up?" Sam asked getting straight to the point.
"What's up with what?" Dean asked pretending not to follow his brother's train of thoughts.
"With you and Cas." Sam replied simply, hoping his brother would spill.
"Nothing." Dean replied defensively.
"Dean, come on man. You can tell me." Sam said cajolingly and giving Dean his best puppy dog eyes.
Dean just closed his eyes as he tried to think how to tell Sam.
"Well, first he doesn't like me-" Dean started but Sam interrupted him.
"That's crap." He said, Dean just glared at him and continued.
"And even if he did I don't think he's single-"
"If he likes you he'll be single quick enough." Sam quickly cut in addressing that problem hoping they would get to the real reason.
"But none of that matters. I can't be with him Sam." Dean finally finished weakly.
"Why? Give me one good reason Dean?" Sam demanded.
"Because nobody knows I'm… you know. How can I think of having a relationship with someone when I can't tell anyone? When I can't introduce him to my friends? Who would want to be in a relationship like that? How could I be with someone and yet make them feel like I'm embarrassed with them? How could I do that to anyone?" Dean asked everything that had been running through his head the last few days spilling out of him.
Sam just sat there and looked at Dean. He really didn't know what to say expect for the obvious.
"Why don't you just tell people?" he asked his brother gently. He didn't understand Dean's resistance to that. He doubted anyone would really care. At least not those who were important.
"Cos I can't Sammy. What if they…reject me? What if they treat me different? I'm a damn good detective but would any of them want to work with someone like me?" he asked with fear in his eyes.
"Yes Dean they would. They know you. There not going to look at you different just cos you have a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend." Sam replied instantly and with conviction.
"How do you know that Sam?" Dean whispered to his brother while he held his head in his hands.
"Cos there my friends too Dean and I know them. Their good guys, just give them a chance to prove it to you." Sam said putting his hand on his brother's shoulder in a show of comfort.
"I don't know Sammy, I just don't know." Dean finally replied wearily leaning back on the couch and closing his eyes.
Sam knew that was the best he was going to get from his brother so changed the conversation to something more light-hearted.
That night he sent a reply to the Queen, though what she could do to help Dean with this problem he really didn't know.
And Charlie sitting on her throne read the message.
Dear Queen,
Dean is worried as he doesn't feel he can tell the people works with about his sexuality. I have tried to tell him they would be fine with it but he doesn't seem to believe me. I don't know what else to do.
Yours sincerely
Sam.
Once she had finished she sat back and thought. Dean Winchester wasn't one to believe what was told him. But if he was shown, then maybe it would get through to him. With that she pulled over her phone to call the one person who could help her with this. (Ooh who's she calling?)