"That's the first time you've called me your girlfriend. It's nice to hear." Ruth sets her empty soup bowl aside.
"Well, any other term didn't quite seem quite right. Catherine liked that I called you my girlfriend, actually. It's been a long time since I called anyone my girlfriend. Catherine said I must be growing up." Harry tells Ruth.
"I don't mind the tern girlfriend, in fact, I think it's sweet. I haven't been called someone's girlfriend for a long time and it's easier to tell you daughter you have a girlfriend than to say you have a lover, hey?" Ruth teases Harry. She knows he has trouble talking to his children.
"Lover is such a tawdry term. I would never refer to you that way. You are so much more than that. That's why I called you my girlfriend because I wanted you and Catherine to know how important you are to me." Harry picks up the soup bowls and sets them in the sink. He brings the plates of sweet and sour chicken and sticky rice over.
"I know how important I am I you. You made it perfectly clear last night. We don't need terms like girlfriend to tell how important we are to each other. Do you feel you need to prove you feelings to me?" Ruth asks gently.
"I don't know. I suppose I just want you to know everything I have floating around in my head. There's so much I want to tell you. I suppose I'm not as secure in myself as some people suppose I am." Harry says tiredly. Ruth notes how tidily Harry wields his chopsticks.
"You don't need to be insecure, Harry. I told you last night you are sexy and handsome and I care so much about you. You are the most special person to me. I love you, Harry." Ruth grasps Harry's hand.
Harry finds himself unable to meet Ruth's intense eyes. He's still unsure of himself in his personal relationship with Ruth, even though he pushed for this relationship to take shape. Ruth is so reassuring to him, but sometimes he feels so insecure in himself that her reassurances don't help.
Ruth notices that Harry hasn't answered her or even believed her. She sets her chopsticks down and stands up. She goes over to Harry and kneels next to him. "Harry look at me." Ruth puts her hand on Harry's knee. "What are you so concerned about? There's something going on. What is it? You can tell me. You should be able to tell me anything. I've never seen you like this before. We can make this work if's that's what you're concerned about. Talk to me." Ruth stands up and sits on Harry's lap. Harry wraps his arms around Ruth and pulls her as close as possible. Harry turns his face into Ruth's neck. "I love you, Harry, but I don't understand where this insecurity is coming from. You know me and we get along well, so what's the concern?"
"Oh Ruth, I don't expect you to understand unless I tell you. I do have some fears, more than you'd expect. I haven't considered being in a serious relationship since I was with Jane and Juliet. I don't want to blow this. Being part of a couple again terrifies me. I'm terrible in relationships and my temper doesn't help. I tend to give up too easily, but I don't want to do that this time." Harry's voice is thick with emotion.
Ruth kisses Harry's forehead. "Look at me Harry. You need to stop worrying. Whatever happens we'll figure it out together. Just think of all the things we do at work that we survive. We can do this. Do you trust me?"
"Of course, I trust you implicitly. This is not about trust, Ruth. I will never stop worrying. I so want this to be perfect." Harry looks seriously at Ruth.
"Well, it's never going to be perfect, especially with this job. We have to just to the best we can. I believe in you, Harry, even if you don't believe in yourself."
Harry kisses Ruth gently, knowing she's right. Ruth cuddles against Harry. "Shall I put dinner in to reheat? It's probably cold by now."
"Sure. Are you okay now?" Ruth asks as she stands up.
"Yeah, just a crisis of confidence. I'll be fine." Harry picks the plates up and puts them in the microwave one at a time.
While Harry is reheating their dinner Ruth moves her chair as near to Harry's chair as possible. She wants to make him feel as comfortable as possible. Last night was perfect and she wants the comfort from last night back. She slips her heels off leaving her in her bare feet. Harry sets the meal back down in front of Ruth and he sits down reaching for Ruth's hand. Ruth starts to eat and she looks right at Harry as she runs her foot up Harry's leg inside his trousers. Harry raises his eyebrows at her. She's been very bold over the past 24 hours. She manages to maintain her composure as she runs her toes over Harry's calf.