"You walk along the stream

Your head caught in a waking dream

Your protector's coming home

Coming home."

~Fleet Foxes, "Your Protector"

Chapter 2: Rebirth

Mikasa slept fitfully, her dreams full of mazes of corridors that never seemed to end. Every time she thought she'd found a way out, she found another wall blocking her way instead. And the entire time, she could feel a presence close behind her, always moving in. They were going to catch her. They were going to make sure she'd never leave…

She felt a hand close on her shoulder.

"Mikasa?"

And suddenly she wasn't in the maze anymore. She was lying in a tangle of white sheets, breathing hard, her long matted hair plastered across her face. It took a minute for the room to come into focus, but the first sight that registered was Eren standing over her, concern etched in the creases around his eyes. She realized it was his hand that she'd felt on her shoulder, but he dropped it away quickly once he realized she was awake, stepping back from her hurriedly as though she might explode.

"You were tossing around in your sleep," he explained. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Besides, we'll have to clear out of this room soon anyway."

Mikasa studied him, puzzled at his demeanor. His eyes were averted now, his head sunk into a half bow, his hands behind his back. She was not at all used to being addressed in such a fashion. She blinked once, trying to figure out how to respond.

"Where are we?" she asked finally, letting her gaze wander around the room now. It was simply decorated, wooden furniture, paneled walls, a single wash basin in the corner. A chair rested against the wall in the corner with a forest green cape draped across the back adorned with an insignia of a pair of wings. Had Eren slept there? Slowly, Mikasa realized she didn't have much of a memory from the previous night after she and Eren had escaped.

"Just a room at an Inn the next town over," Eren told her. He'd looked back up at her now, but still seemed unsure of quite what to say. "You kind of… passed out last night after we got out of that shithole. I don't blame you, I can't even imagine… well it's no big deal. I just brought you here because I already had a room rented, I hope it's okay."

Mikasa didn't say anything. The reality of the situation was finally sinking in. She was out. She never had to go back to that place ever again. She was free… but now what?

"You… brought me here?" she asked, the embarrassment of realizing that meant Eren must have carried her miles and miles to get here also finally sinking in. She felt her cheeks go red.

"Yeah. I hope it's okay, I mean, I wasn't sure if you had anywhere else to go and I thought… Do you? Have anywhere you want to go, I mean?"

Dim memories surfaced in Mikasa's mind: her old home, those happy images of her parents' smiling faces that felt real to her again now that she was out of the dark. But they'd been killed. She didn't even know how far she was from that old home. Perhaps it had been cleaned for a new family to live in. Or perhaps it still lay nestled in the hills, abandoned.

"Shiganshina?" she asked, her cracked voice barely a whisper. At the word, a Eren's eyes grew instantly cloudy.

"Yeah, well we'd all like to get back there."

"What do you mean?"

Eren's shoulders slumped and he was suddenly unable to meet Mikasa's eyes.

"There's a lot you need to be filled in on, and we don't really have time at the moment. You're welcome to get washed up, and I brought you some clothes to change into," he gestured to the end of the bed where they were folded. "And then I thought we could go get some food and I'll… well I'll fill you in I guess."

Mikasa nodded, wondering what he could possibly be talking about, but didn't question it further for the moment. She stood gingerly, feeling the bruises all over her body left from their escape yesterday smart. Almost immediately, she fell back to the bed, wincing.

"They got you pretty good, didn't they?" Eren asked. Mikasa had a dim flashback to Lothar kicking her continuously. She nodded.

"It's okay, we'll find a stream somewhere for you to wash off. That would probably be nicer for you anyway. We still have to leave though, the owners will be here to kick us out any minute. I only had enough money for one night."

As he spoke, Eren reached for a brown satchel that had been hanging on the back of the door and put Mikasa's new clothes inside, slinging it over his shoulder. Then he picked up the green cape hanging over the chair and fastened it around his neck. Once ready, he turned back to Mikasa, holding out his hand.

"Just lean on me."

Gingerly, Mikasa tried to rise again. Almost immediately her legs began to shake, threatening to give way once more, but Eren caught her around the waist so that she fell against him instead. Like a reflex, she reached out and held onto him, letting his steady support help her find her ground. She took a step, then another.

"See? You're going to be okay."

Mikasa didn't say anything, but rather looked away hoping he wouldn't see her cheeks beginning to tinge with red as they left the room.

As they made their way to the front desk so Eren could return the room key, Mikasa's brain was quickly getting over its exhaustion and starting to grind back into motion again. All she'd known of the world for years now had been that dark cell and the dark room down the hall. All she'd known of men had been that they were cruel creatures who cared nothing about her except what they could get from her. All she'd known of herself was a constant struggle to keep breathing. And all at once everything had changed.

Perhaps it was still the shock that was keeping reality from truly sinking in, but Mikasa was struggling with how to feel about it all. She knew, logically, that she should be happy. But Eren's reaction when she brought up Shiganshina let her know that the world she'd left and the world she was about to re-enter weren't the same world, and that thought made her extremely uneasy.

One by one, truth after truth was starting to fully resonate with her. She'd murdered two people last night. She was a killer now. Would she have to go to jail? Perhaps that was where Eren really planned to take her. She cast a sidelong glance at the boy she was so heavily leaning on, and it felt like she was looking at him with new eyes. What did she really know about him anyway? Not much. She'd spent so many years romanticizing him but now that she thought about it, the only conclusion she could make about him was that he was from Shiganshina as well, and even that she couldn't be sure about. He could be a serial killer; he'd certainly seemed to know his way around a knife last night, after all. He could want to kidnap her to use her for his own purposes. Perhaps he wanted his own personal whore.

Mikasa flashed back to her dark cell and shuddered, almost overwhelmed by the horror of being trapped in a similar situation again.

"You okay?" Eren asked. He'd paused in the middle of the hall they'd been walking down and was looking at her with concern. "You just… shook a little bit."

Mikasa hadn't realized her shudder had been outward. She nodded at him silently, but continued to regard him with apprehension. He seemed to decide to let it go, and started walking again, not saying anything more.

Slowly, Mikasa felt her heart rate began to even out. As the momentary panic subsided, her logic began to resurface. If Eren really wanted to trap her again, wouldn't he have kept moving with her? He wouldn't have wanted to stop at a public inn, where everyone would bear witness to them together in broad daylight. No, it didn't make sense. For the time being, she decided it was safe to stay with him, but that she should remain on her guard: a daunting thought when she still felt so physically exhausted.

When they finally got to the front desk, the innkeeper gave them a strange glance and Mikasa realized how odd the pair of them must look: an unkempt girl in a dirty white dress barely being held on her feet with the help of the handsome young man who clearly held some kind of a place of importance in the world. The innkeeper eyed Eren's green cloak with what seemed to be a mix of reverence and suspicion. Eren thanked him for the service and when they finally turned to leave Mikasa was glad to get away from his scrutinizing gaze.

The sunlight outside felt wonderful on Mikasa's face, but the stares of the other people on the streets did not. They all looked at them the same way the innkeeper had, making Mikasa wish she could make herself invisible. This was not at all how she'd ever pictured re-entering the real-world.

Eren, on the other hand, seemed unperturbed by the stares. He just kept his eyes straight ahead, his arm around Mikasa's waist, taking careful steps to make sure he was still supporting her extra weight. Mikasa was starting to wonder if he could see the wandering eyes of the villagers at all, when he muttered to her under his breath,

"Ignore them."

Mikasa felt her cheeks flush again, though she wasn't sure why. She spent the rest of their short walk to the tavern with her eyes to the ground, refusing to meet anyone else's gaze again.

The lighting inside the tavern was dim, unlike the harsh glare of the outside world. Eren led Mikasa to a booth nestled in the corner and helped her into her bench before seating himself across from her.

"Get anything you want. It's on me. Or... I guess it's on the Survey Corps but same thing basically."

As she stared at the menu it dawned on Mikasa just how hungry she was. Suddenly everything looked good. She had to restrain herself from ordering it all when their order was taken, and when the food came she dug into mashed potatoes and chicken and rolls like there was no tomorrow.

Eren's brow knit as he watched her.

"How much did they feed you there?"

Mikasa paused, chewing her food slower and swallowing as she looked up at him. She didn't have to ask where he meant.

"Not much. One meal a day, at most. And it was nothing very substantial. Just enough to keep me alive."

Eren's fist clenched tighter around his fork as she spoke. "Bastards," he muttered, closing his eyes, willing himself to remain calm.

"What's going to happen to that place?" Mikasa asked. Eren continued to glare at his food, which he had yet to touch.

"I called the Military Police last night, and they raided the place. They arrested as many of the men as they could and got the rest of the imprisoned girls out."

"If you had a way to call back-up, why didn't you bring them in the first place?"

It was Eren's turn for his cheeks to flush red.

"What?" Mikasa asked.

"I just wanted to get you myself. Maybe it was stupid, but I didn't realize there'd be quite that many of them. And I don't really trust the Military Police, honestly. I mean, I'm sure the rest of the girls that were there will be fine, but I just… I don't know."

Mikasa wasn't quite sure what he meant, but the question she really wanted to ask was still weighing heavily on her so she decided to let it go.

"And… what about, you know, Lothar?"

The part she'd left unsaid hung in the air: The man I killed.

"Oh, don't worry," Eren dismissed, waving a hand. "He was wanted already. You basically just did the police's job for them. No one's going to press charges."

Mikasa frowned. That didn't seem quite right. What kind of society had she re-entered? But then again, she thought, probably the same kind of society where a place like her prison could have existed in the first place. She ripped off another piece of bread with her teeth.

"So.., about Shiganshina," Eren began slowly, not seeming to know how to progress with the sentence. "They didn't fill you in on much back at that place, did they?"

Mikasa shook her head.

"Do you know about the Titans?"

To most who lived behind the walls, this question might have seemed ridiculous. The Titan threat loomed over them all constantly, shadowing their daily lives with fear that they could be exterminated any second. But it was not a strange question to Mikasa.

She chewed her food thoughtfully, thinking back. Her parents had mentioned them in passing, but had never elaborated on them in much detail. They always spoke about them in fear, and Mikasa's mother had warned her to never venture outside the walls, or else they would eat her like the villain in some sort of twisted fairytale. But that was all such strange, unseen creatures had seemed to her: a fairytale.

"I know that they're the reason that we live behind the walls and I know they're very big and very dangerous," Mikasa told Eren finally.

"But you don't know what they've done recently?"

Mikasa blinked at him slowly, what was still left of her food lying neglected on the plate.

"I thought… I thought no one inside the walls had seen one in over a hundred years."

Eren's face was deathly serious now, his eyes turned to stone.

"Yeah, that was the case before you were taken," he was suddenly unable to meet Mikasa's eyes again. "But… well a few years later, they broke through the walls. And they took down Wall Maria first."

His fists had rolled into tight balls again. Mikasa watched him with wide eyes, feeling like an invisible hand had taken hold of her windpipe and wouldn't let go.

"I'm from Shiganshina too. My father was the local doctor."

At his words, something stirred in Mikasa's memory. "That will be doctor Jaeger…" those were her father's last words before he received a knife to the gut. They were supposed to be there that day. They must have been the first to come across the gory scene later. That must have been how he'd known… And all these years he'd just seemed like a miracle that had come out of no where. Eren kept speaking.

"I was there, the day they took Wall Maria. The level of destruction was enormous. A lot of people died. I lost my own mother to one of those things."

He didn't seem to even know where he was anymore as he spoke these words. He was back in time, in that moment, seeing it all flash again before his eyes. Mikasa knew that look. She knew it because she'd felt it many times before. Without thinking, she reached out to gently touch his hand.

"I'm sorry."

Eren blinked a little in confusion, then seemed to come back to the present. Mikasa pulled her hand away again quickly, but Eren gave her a small smile.

"Thanks. Anyway, ever since that day the Titans have been moving further and further inside the walls. We're behind the second-to-last wall now. Rose and Sheena still stand, but we've still had some major cut-downs in space. Unfortunately, when the Titans attack, there are also cut-downs in population numbers. We lost nearly 20% of humanity."

"So… my old house?" Mikasa whispered. But she already knew the answer.

"Even if they didn't crush it, it will have been abandoned for years. Maybe even caving in on itself by now."

Mikasa nodded slowly. "It's not like there was anything left for me there anyway," she muttered. "But… that means I really have no where to go."

"That's actually what I wanted to propose to you," Eren said, his eyes sparking back up again, the stone starting to chip away. "There are some of us who fight to reclaim the world for humanity. We go outside the walls and face the Titans directly. We're planning a mission back to Shiganshina even now, because we have a lead to some answers about the true source of the Titans!"

Eren spoke faster and faster, his eyes fully lit up now.

"I can't promise you safety all the time. In fact a lot of people think going outside the walls at all means certain death. But I saw you with that knife last night, and I know you've got it in you. I think you could be a damn good titan slayer."

"But I… All I did was…" Mikasa stared at her hands, remembering what it had felt like to have blood running down them.

"Look," Eren said gently, and she looked back up at him in a daze. He gave her a small smile. "I've been at this for awhile. I'm not the best in the Corps, but I'm not the worst either, and I've seen what it takes to survive out there. It's a lot more than just skill. It's drive and heart and a shit-ton of willpower. You've got all that in you, I know it. That's what I saw yesterday. You're not someone who gives up."

Mikasa had never really thought about herself that way. Years of fighting not to fall into hopelessness, but she had merely considered it a survival tactic. She thought of the rage that had coursed through her as she'd driven the knife into her captors. Then she thought of her morning: the stares of the innkeeper and other people in the streets. The mental image of her house lying in shambles somewhere, possibly run down by Titans. She'd escaped captivity, so why didn't she feel free yet?

"So… What do you say?" Eren was watching her closely, his gaze unfaltering. Mikasa took a deep breath, then finally looked up to meet his eyes.

"I'll do it."

Thanks to the food, Mikasa's strength had returned by the time she and Eren stood to leave the Tavern. She walked outside on her own two feet, no longer needing to lean on the boy that remained by her side.

She didn't need to worry about ignoring any stares from other pedestrians this time because her head was spinning too much to pay attention. She only looked up when Eren spoke for the first time since they'd left.

"So we're pretty much going to have to walk from here, think you're up for it? It'll just take us a couple days."

Mikasa nodded.

"You okay?" Eren asked.

Mikasa nodded again. But then Eren stopped walking abruptly, causing Mikasa to pause as well in confusion, the rhythm of their steps broken. She turned to look at him. His hand twitched as though he wanted to reach out for her, but he held back, instead just locking her gaze in his as he stared at her fiercely.

"You don't have to do this, you know that, right? You could go anywhere you want now. I know I talked us up back there and I really do think you'd be great at this, but only do this if you want to, okay? I don't want to drag you into anything you don't want to do."

Mikasa stared at him, this boy with his eyes alight, giving her a choice for the first time in her life. He was so off-putting for her. But as she watched him, somehow she knew he meant it. It scared her that she could possibly know anything without having proof first, that logically she should be questioning everything he said, that still he was technically a stranger… And yet she couldn't deny that she did. For some inexplicable reason, he didn't seem like a stranger at all.

"Eren… This is what I want to do. I think it's what I need to do. I've spent the majority of my life locked away in a prison, only to escape and realize the world beyond is merely a bigger prison. I'm tired of being locked away."

Eren regarded her for a moment longer."You're sure?"

"Yes!" Mikasa could feel exasperation starting to seep into her tone, but Eren finally seemed satisfied.

"Okay then." He turned back around and they resumed their walk side by side down the road again, heading out of town.

"I'm… I mean…" Eren stuttered. "I… think this will be good. For, you know, everybody."

He was so strange.

"It should be around here somewhere…"

"Didn't you just walk past it a few days ago?"

"Yeah, but it's not where I thought it was."

"It's a big stream running through a forest, how is it this hard to find?"

"I don't know, you tell me! Do you know any nature tricks to figure out where water is?"

"Can't say I've gotten out much in the past few years to pick up water tracking techniques, honestly."

Eren stopped dead in his tracks, glancing back at Mikasa, a few paces behind him.

"Sorry. I wasn't thinking."

Silence fell between them again. They'd been traipsing through the forest beyond the town they'd just left for almost an hour now, and yet still they'd been unable to find the stream Eren had promised for Mikasa. And of course with every step Mikasa couldn't help becoming increasingly aware of how much she wanted to find a stream now. Since she'd eaten and gotten rid of the gnawing feeling in her stomach, she'd started to notice the rest of her discomfort. She still had dried blood in random places all over her body. Her hair was caught in matted tangles that disgusted her just to feel. Everything about her prison was still etched onto her, claiming her even though she'd escaped.

"I think it might be this way…" Eren was saying, but a different sound caught Mikasa's ears. She turned, following it, and the closer she got the more she could tell: it was the sound of rushing water.

"Where are you going?" Eren called, not having realized Mikasa was no longer with him until she was quite a few paces away. But Mikasa only increased her speed, the sound of the water beckoning, propelling her forward. And then, suddenly, she'd broken through the trees into a clearing in the middle of the forest.

The source of the rushing sound was coming from a small waterfall spilling over the edge of a rock formation beyond, emptying into a pool where the water spread out, only to branch out into another stream flowing away in the opposite direction. It was one of the most welcome sights Mikasa had ever seen.

"Hey, you found it!" Eren came stumbling up behind her, his feet crunching through the twigs on the ground loudly. Mikasa strode forward silently, entranced by the falling water. She knelt at the pool's edge, letting her fingers slide into its cool welcoming depths, watching as the blood that encrusted her fingernails already began to fall off, swept away down the river forever. She reached to take off her old dirty dress, ready to be rid of it.

"Whoa! Whoa, just wait a second!" Eren cried, turning away from her quickly, though Mikasa could see the tips of his ears turning red. For a moment she'd forgotten he was there. She paused.

"I'll just… I'll keep watch from over here. Here are the clothes you can change into," he set them down on a rock safely out of the way of the water. Then he walked over to sit on a rock a few feet away from the pool, facing away from Mikasa.

"I won't look, I promise!" he called.

Mikasa stared at his back for a moment, puzzled. It had been a long time since a man had averted his eyes at the thought of her nudity. She'd grown so used to being bathed by the pigs who worked in her prison, disrobed at the hands of her clients whenever they pleased, every inch of her constantly under someone else's control. Now Eren sat, determinedly facing away, ears red, promising not to look. It seemed very important to him too: not looking.

"Why?" Mikasa called to him. He turned around incredulously.

"Why what?"

"Why aren't you going to look?"

Eren blinked at her for a second more, dumbfounded. "Do you… want me to look?"

Mikasa pondered this for a moment, looking down at her still-clothed body.

"No."

"Okay," Eren said, giving her a nod and turning away again. "That's why."

There it was again: a choice. Mikasa was still pondering it as she finally did slide off her dress and slip her full form into the pool. The water felt amazing. A little cold, perhaps, but the chill felt like a caress on her sore muscles, waking them up. It was the most alive she'd felt in a long time. She rubbed at the dirt, blood, and grime plastered everywhere and watched as it all washed away little by little, revealing the pale skin beneath to the sunlight. Then she took a deep breath and submerged herself fully in the water, the world going silent around her.

It was as though time stopped beneath the surface. Mikasa opened her eyes carefully. The world around her was hazy; nothing ever really coming into focus except for her own form. She could see her hair spreading out around her, dark tendrils floating lazily upward. She looked down and saw herself, every inch of herself, bruised and sun-deprived but very much there. Real when nothing else was. She held up one of her hands and gazed at it. It was so clean, the blood of her captors having all washed away, but she knew the power it held now. Eren may have handed her the knife, but she'd slain her demons herself. This hand was hers again. This body was hers again.

And then her head broke the surface, her lungs filling with air, and she was back in the sunlight.

After Mikasa had bathed to her heart's content, she'd gotten out and put on the clothes Eren had bought for her. It was just a simple sweater and skirt, but the fabric was soft and felt nice against her skin. Then they'd spent most of the rest of the day walking, continuing to make their way through the forests, until it started to grow dark and Eren suggested they find a place to camp for the night.

"We should be able to make it back to headquarters tomorrow, but for that to happen we need to be well-rested. No use stumbling around in the dark."

Mikasa was relieved to hear it. Most of their walk for the rest of the day had been uphill, and she was starting to grow tired. And so they found an overlook spot at the edge of a cliff where they could see far out over the valley and forests beyond, just in time to watch the last beautiful colors of the sunset disappear over the horizon.

"It's been a long time since I've gotten to see the sunset," Mikasa breathed. Eren didn't say anything, she noticed. She glanced over at him and caught him doing the same thing to her out of the corner of his eye. He blinked and turned his head away quickly.

"Well I'm glad you get to see it now," was all he said.

Eren started setting down blankets, finally pulling out some bread and apples and handing them to Mikasa. She accepted gratefully, hunger having started to twinge at her again as they'd walked all day.

They sat in silence for awhile, eating and gazing at the horizon before them. The stars were starting to appear one by one and the moon, big and bright tonight, was visible. Neither seemed to know what to say. It appeared they'd exhausted all small-talk topics throughout the day.

"So…" Eren began, exhaling through the word. But he trailed off.

"You can ask me about it, you know."

"No, really, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I just… whenever I think about all those years, and you were there, and I didn't get there until yesterday and I just… Damn it, I just wish it hadn't taken so long for my contacts to hunt you down. I wish I'd known where to start looking myself. No, I just wish I'd gotten there in time that day before. None of this should have happened."

His eyes were extremely bright now, and fixed on the sky above. He couldn't look at her.

"Why do you care so much anyway?" Mikasa asked. The question had been nagging at her. "You don't even know me."

Eren turned to fix her gaze with his.

"Nobody should have to go through what you went through. Nobody."

Mikasa felt something clench in her throat and looked away from him quickly. She could feel tears starting to pool in her eyes, but now was not the time to show weakness. She blinked hard, willing them away fiercely, shivering inadvertently in the night air that was starting to develop a chill in the sun's absence. She heard Eren stand up next to her and walk away. Perhaps he'd seen her tears. He was probably disgusted. But then a minute later she felt him back at her side again and looked up in surprise. He was sitting next to her, holding out a maroon piece of cloth.

"You seemed cold. My mom made this for me. It's one of the last things I have left from her, but I want you to have it."

Eren unfolded the cloth, revealing it to be a long scarf, which he proceeded to wrap carefully around Mikasa's neck a few times. She could feel it trap the heat instantly like an embrace around her, and then she realized: it was the same scarf he'd been wearing when he chased after her so many years ago.

"It's warm, isn't it?" Eren asked, giving her the smallest of smiles.

Mikasa didn't know what to say. She could feel tears starting to well up in her eyes again, but this time she let them fall openly, burying her face in the soft fabric of the scarf.

"Hey... It's going to be okay," Eren murmured quietly, reaching out an arm and putting it tentatively around her shoulders. Mikasa let him. And even though she knew deep down that he had no room to be making promises like that, that now nothing about the future could be set in stone, she leaned into him, letting herself feel safe for just a moment. Safe with this boy that she'd only known for a day yet that she somehow felt like she'd known for much longer. Safe for the first time since she'd been ripped from her home so many years ago.

"Tomorrow we're going home," Eren promised.

A/N: Thank you so much to anyone who has read/is reading. Seriously, every hit means so much to me. I hope you'll stick around for next chapter because I'm going to start bringing the rest of the crew into the mix! Also I'm going to start having more time off from work as the month progresses so hopefully I'll be able to start posting more frequently. That's it for now, all feedback is appreciated~