So sorry for not updating and this being so sad, but I feel like I need to add a little angst to a very humor run story!

To Feel the Way I Feel

I never asked for this. This whole entire experience. What I didn't know, and what no one can know, is what I'm going to tell you today.

It was the middle of the school year. The snow was falling, and the wind blew cold into your bones. It was one of the most miserable winters Hillwood had ever seen. However, since it was only negative two degrees, we had school. I was not happy. I wanted to sleep in, but as always my mom yelled for me, at the bottom of the stair:

"Sylvester, you better get up and get ready for school!"

Of course, the one day I had reserved for video games and junk food, I have to spend in school. Brigitta, my sister, didn't care. She loves school. She doesn't realize the torment she's in for in fourth grade. Anyway, when I arrived at school my best friend, Tanner, was waiting for me. He's the son of my Dad's best friend, Gerald.

"I can't believe we have to go to school when it's this cold!" He stated.

"Yeah. That's what's happens when your superintendent is from Alaska." I explained.

We continued our conversation after we got out of the frost biting cold. I never appreciated the school's furnace so much before! Then I saw, her.

She was one of the foreign exchange students from Japan, and she was beautiful! She had long black hair, soft blue eyes, white teeth, and was very tall. She had me stopped in my tracks. I never felt my heart beat so fast.

"What's wrong?" Tanner asked.

"Nothing." I answered, "Nothing at all."

We then separated to our classes, but I couldn't pay attention in class. All I could think about was the girl in the hall.

We then had lunch. I sat down at my lunch table with Tanner, Abigale; Rhonda Lloyd and Curly's daughter, Jenna; Harold and Patty's daughter, and Stinky; Stinky and Lila's son. They all set their stuff down, and got into the lunch line. I wasn't feeling well, so I skipped lunch. Then something marvelous happened!

She walked up to me!

"Hello, I was wondering if you could help me find the drinking fountain." She said.

"Um… yeah, there's one over there." I pointed it out.

"Thank you." She smiled, and walked away.

Of all the people in that lunch room, she picked ME to help her find a drinking fountain! I was feeling on top of the world. Nothing could bring me down, and I was wrong.

A few days of embarrassing me staring, her looking at me weird occurred after the drinking fountain question. But, she would always smile and laugh. Not at me, with me.

I couldn't stand being on the outside of her circle of friends. I wanted to get close. As it turned out, fate was on my side, for now.

I got home to the boarding house after school, and went into the living room. My Dad was finishing up grading at school, and Mom was busy in her study, writing another book. My sister was staying after school to go home with my Dad. Then I heard a crash outside.

I ran out, and saw a car that hit a light pole, after slipping on the ice. I saw it was The Girl, and some older man I didn't know. They were both fine, but their car was severely damaged. The older man got out of the car.

"Hello young man, may we use your phone?" He asked me. I told him to wait while I went to get my Mom.

She came out, and saw what happened.

"Oh that darn intersection always freezes. I keep telling them "Put down more salt!" but no! I'm sorry, I'm Helga Shortman, and this is my son, Sylvester." She introduced.

"Hi." I said.

"Hello, I'm Jeremy Mann, and this is the girl who's staying with my family, Anna Kato."

Anna Kato. The most beautiful name I had ever heard.

"May we use your phone?" He asked.

"Oh yes, by all means!" Mother told him.

We all went inside. Anna was walking beside me.

"Would you like some hot chocolate?" I asked her.

"Yes, thank you." She answered quietly. She doesn't seem as comfortable around me as at school. Maybe it was just me.

So, I made her some hot chocolate, and we sat in silence while her 'guardian' was on the phone with his insurance company.

Suddenly, this came out of the blue,

"Would you like to kiss me?" She asked.

My eyes widened.

"What?" I asked quietly.

"Sorry, that was kind of abrupt. I just really like you, and I was wondering if you like me." She stated casually.

"Well, um, yeah, but I don't know anything about you!" I told her.

"I know that you like to play sports, but only outdoor sports, given that there is very little dust on your game counsel, and the fact that your tennis shoes are worn, but are only four months old." She stated.

I don't know what came over me. I just got up walked over to her, and kissed her. It was very nice, and short.

"Where have you been hiding?" I asked her.

"Japan." She answered.

We laughed.

We continued dating the rest of the school year. She told me about her adventures in Japan, and I told her about my many adventures in Hillwood. We began to really understand each other, and trusted each other. I really started to, love her. Then she had to leave.

She went back to Japan over the summer, and stayed most of the school year. We kept in touch through Skype, and she was supposed to come back in April. She never did.

"What happened, Sylvester?" Dr. Bliss asked.

Sylvester's eyes began to tear up.

"The tsunami came." He stated.

Dr. Bliss looked at him with sympathy.

"I tried to call her. I leaned that…" He choked up, "that her town was right on the shore, and um…" sniffle, "she was never found."

"Sylvester, I am so sorry." Dr. Bliss stated.

"It's alright, these things happen." Sylvester looked down.

"Sylvester, it's not alright. These things just don't happen. This is the problem. You're building up all this sadness and anger, that you can't hold it anymore. Two years of hiding your emotions is not a way to feel better. Tell me again what happened today." Dr. Bliss suggested.

"Everything was normal. I have kind of moved on. It took a while, but I felt like I could smile, and have fun again, but then Mr. Raybell turned on that video on earthquakes, and I couldn't stand it. I asked to go to the bathroom, and I cried in there. Tanner came in and heard me, and told a teacher, and here I am." Sylvester explained.

"Sylvester, you're not moving on, you're repressing this experience in the back of your mind. That video brought it back." Dr. Bliss told him.

"Will I be okay Doctor?" Sylvester asked.

"I do believe so, but I would like you to meet with me in my office every Tuesday, and I will have to tell your parent's about this." Dr. Bliss explained.

"Alright, but can you just leave the whole romantic relationship out of it?" He asked.

"Okay, I will. I'll just tell them it was a very close friend." Dr. Bliss promised.

"Thank you Doctor. I feel much better!" Sylvester than walked out, "See you on Tuesday Doctor."

"See you." Dr. Bliss than picked up the phone and called the Shortman's, "Hello Mrs. Shortman, this is Dr. Bliss. Yes Helga. I'm calling about your son Sylvester."

Like Dr. Bliss said, I'll be fine. Just fine.

Dedicated to all the victims of the Japanese tsunami of March, 2011.