A/N: I had such a blast writing this chapter that I wanted to share it and let you know that more of this story is here. So here's where we are at in the story, vampire Bella thinks dead Jacob tried to sabotage her budding relationship with human Edward Masen by imprinting on him (body possession for a short time) Bella gets freaked out but Alice talks her into not holding that against Edward, who still wants to get to know Bella. Bella agreed to go on a road trip with Alice to meet their family in Denali this weekend, which works out because Edward said he was going to be tied up in meetings all weekend for his project at the local amusement park.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

Chapter 13:

Sex and the City

"What if something happens to him while we are away, Alice?" I chewed on my nails. "I mean. . . what if he ends up doing something that lands him in the hospital and I'm not there to…"

"Don't worry! Jazz is going to keep an eye on him." She turned to Esme. "So we're headed to Aunt Tanya's for a girls' weekend. Esme are you sure you won't come?" Alice hummed with an excitement that was almost annoying.

It was true that we were getting out of Forks and heading north above the border. Ed - I mean Edward - wasn't going to be available anyway this weekend. Yes, I had to remind myself to call him that, and I needed to find out why the name change. Usually it's the other way around with given names and nicknames. I've been correcting people to call me just Bella for years. Just-Bella. When I had opened the medical kit Edward had returned to me I found my phone inside, which I had forgotten I left in there that day, and a hockey puck with an attached note that Alice had called me out on smiling over as I read it.

Thank you for indulging me with playing hockey

Your choice next time

-Edward

He had to have written that before he came to the house. Pretty smug of him to have assumed there would be a next date. Date, I smiled as I thought to myself. Alice convinced me to leave him something while I was going away, so I had gone over to Charlie's house and baked white chocolate chip cookies. In the hospital he said they were his favorite. Charlie appreciated me leaving some for him, too. Alice helped to package the cookies in a tin and arranged to have them messengered over to Edward's hotel.

So sure I knew what his favorite cookies were and what hotel he was staying in, but there were a few things about Edward Masen I hadn't figured out yet, not just the name request. I wondered why he needed to preface telling me he wanted to spend more time with me with, 'I know it is selfish of me.' That was something I should have been thinking, that it was selfish of me to want to be in his company. I had a long car ride ahead of me to think on it.

Esme was in a great mood as she answered Alice's question. "Yes dear, I'm sure, but do wish them all well from me and go easy on their cocktails," she answered.

"Cocktails?" I asked. "Like more O negative?" I was a bit worried at the thought as it had been so long since I had human blood. I was afraid of temptation.

Carlisle stepped in, "Don't worry Bella. My sister and her friends have their own version of cocktails. And, well, Tanya has her own version of what it means to be a vampire—she's more of a vampiress."

"But she has always shared your vision, correct?" I asked.

Carlisle nodded, "It's best I tell you the story now before you meet them. You see, I hadn't seen my eldest sister Tanya for a good eleven years after I was changed, but when I did see her she obviously knew something was different because I looked the same as the day I had gone missing. Our father was a pastor who had already schooled us about vampires, so Tanya was terrified when she realized what had happened to me. But during those eleven years after I left my real family, my father passed away and Tanya had been in a marriage with a terribly abusive man, a man who had beaten her often enough that he caused her three miscarriages. She was left fragile and shattered."

"Oh, that is awful." I cringed at how horribly cruel another human being could be to another, let alone to a spouse.

"Yes it was. Once we reunited and she realized I wasn't going to hurt her, she begged me to help her get out of her marriage by giving her the strength to stand up to her husband, to protect herself. She wanted me to change her. I felt terribly guilty that I had not been able to help her prior to that day and conceded that changing her would be justified since she was my sister, as long as she committed to the vegetarian vision. She agreed and has done really well with thirst for human blood, probably because she is more so ruled by control and power. I had not yet met Esme and I looked forward to having a family again, companionship with someone I cared for and a chance at redemption. Since becoming one of our kind she has coped with her former life by not allowing any man to control her or take advantage of her. She treats men, ahhh, human men, that is, as toys and for her pleasure. It doesn't make her a bad person, or rather I should say vampire. It just makes her…."

I giggled and asked, "A temptress?"

"Auntie Elvira is a vamp tramp!" Emmett walked up to us and offered with a smirk that Carlisle coyly mirrored.

"Emmett, don't call her that!¨ Esme chided defensively. ¨Bella, we try to respect the humans and coexist among them without too much fanfare whereas Tanya likes to flaunt herself a bit more. And Tanya likes to run sort of a women's shelter up there taking in young vampire girls, trying to first introduce them to a diet of animal blood and then encouraging their powers of the feminine persuasion."

Carlisle added, "Yes, and it is that encouragement that worries me.¨

¨Ahem,¨ Esme cleared her throat, softening Carlisle somewhat.

¨Well, where Bella is concerned, that is.¨ He smiled sweetly at Esme.

What was I missing in that little exchange?

Esme stood her ground and intervened on my behalf. "Carlisle, it is ONE fun girls' weekend. Not weeks. Not months! We aren't enrolling Bella in the Tanya Cullen Succubus Training Program or whatever it is you think of it. The girls deserve to get away and have some fun. And Bella has done so well…she needs to get away and gain some more perspective on our lives."

Carlisle nodded his head thoughtfully.

¨Besides,¨ Esme pressed on, ¨Your sister's influence isn't all bad." She winked at him. ¨We don't know what Bella's new life will entail, but we certainly can't expect that it will be simply a reflection of just our lives. She's still young and she needs to experience so many things of her own choosing."

I smiled at Esme remembering how we had discussed my conversation with Emmett and she now was on the same page with how Emmett and I were just going to be friends but just friends. Carlisle was so right about Esme, her compassion and willingness to listen was the true hallmark of her caring personality and her role in this family. And she was brilliant because to a great extent, she was right. We had no idea what the rest of my existence would entail. Exposure to others who were like us in that they were not out feasting on the humans seemed like a welcome change to me. As much as I loved the Cullens, being in Forks as a vampire too often reminded me of what I was missing out on as a human. I was certainly ready to get out of Dodge if it meant taking my mind off of him and the park and the confused, depressed state I had been walking around in for two days.

I turned to Emmett, "You'll keep tabs on Charlie for me?"

"Hell yeah! We've got games on all weekend!" he replied.

Alice giggled and squealed, "Road trip! We're Thelma and Louise-in' it this weekend!" We headed out the front door to Alice's parked car.

Esme called out to us, "Great, but no going over any cliffs!"***

Jasper carried our bags out and packed them into the trunk for us. He kissed Alice passionately but a bit too sloppy for my taste. Alice pulled away giggling then allowed Jasper to resume. When they broke from the kiss finally, Jasper turned to me and smirked before sticking out his tongue.

"What the fuck is that?" I yelled and pulled my face backward at the site of the little silver ball in his mouth.

"You like it? I pierced him myself and then licked the blood," Alice purred. Jasper closed his mouth and kept smirking.

"It's only fair…she got a ring. I got a ring."

Alice cut in, "But I benefit from both."

Vampire freaks full of devotion to each other.

"It's a better reminder than a lighter." Jasper had waited until I had turned around briefly to say that.

What the fuck? Nice Jasper. His words hurt, and he realized it.

"I'm sorry. That was a douche comment." He tried to hug me, and I knew he was going to throw some mental feel-good vibes in but I just couldn't.

"Don't," I clammed up. "Just don't."

"Listen something is up with Carlisle. He's really conflicted about you guys going. He wants you to get away Bella but he feels nervous about Tanya's influence for some reason." Jasper seemed confused. "I can't figure it out."

I had already suspected Carlisle knew about my visitor, despite the fact that Alice and I had aired out the house, but he hadn't brought it up. I wasn't willing to either. Even though Jasper knew about Edward Masen, Alice hadn't spelled out all the details to him.

"Well I can." Alice was matter of fact about the statement like it was clear as day. "C'mon Bella, we've got to hit the road, it's time!"

As we sped away I asked Alice what that was all about with Jasper and she waved it off that he gets way too overprotective of her trips to the Denali Coven and that it had more to do with her than me. ¨You'll understand why once you've met them.¨ Let's hope so because that was rude, I thought.

Alice drove her yellow car with no hesitancy, always handling the curves smoothly and racing over blacktop with fierce anticipation.

"Bella! I swear if you only knew how many times I wanted to bring you up to Denali with me to visit Aunt Tanya and her friends. They are always such a riot, but when you were human I couldn't risk it. They are way too uninhibited in their behavior and very candid in their discussions."

"I remember you telling me a couple times when you were going to visit your aunt and stay over. I always wished you would invite me." I paused. "At least now I know why you never did. I kind of want to say you were always out of it after those weekends, though."

"Oh, that's the Denali hangover."

I looked at her surprised and questioned, "Hangover?"

"You'll see. You are going to love this weekend! I'm so glad you finally get to share in the fun with me!"

Alice and I sped along the road. About a half an hour into our ride my phone rang.

I reached into my purse but Alice put her arm out to stop me and commanded me. "Don't answer it! You're not ready. Trust me!" I looked down at the phone not even recognizing the number that came up anyway. Then I waited.

Beep, beep. There was a message.

"Okay let's hear it." She said. We both listened and my eyes went wide as I heard who it was.

We reached Denali and were welcomed open-armed by four strikingly beautiful women that were introduced as Aunt Tanya, Kate, Carmen and finally Irina, who they affectionately called, Hollywood.

"Alice, you look wonderful, positively glowing! And much love to you and Jasper on your engagement," said the bright-eyed blonde woman who was introduced to me as Kate.

"Now Alice, you know my views on marriage, so I'm just gonna wish you well and remind you there is still time to get out of this predicament you've created for yourself," said Aunt Tanya.

"Bella, this is what you get with Aunt Tanya…and there is no way, Auntie! I'd never give up a chance to throw myself a wedding and have a party where I would know absolutely everyone there!¨ exclaimed Alice.

I was greeted with welcomes and "we feel like we know you" comments with each introduction. It wasn't surprising that I was already familiar to them, after all, I had already been friends with Alice over the years. After they pulled me in and given me a tour of their grand house and we were back in the parlor, Irina showed up with a tray of drinks.

"Cocktail?" she offered. "We've got Bloody Harrys and Plasmapolitans!" she exclaimed in a very proud, sing-song way.

Alice snatched up a rosey pink drink, handed it to me, and pleaded, "Bella you have got to try the Plasmapolitan! They are the best!" Then she turned and grabbed another one for herself. Suddenly I had five sets of very light colored eyes acutely staring at me in speculation as I hesitated.

"Is...is it human blood? Because I don't know if I could handle it…"

The girls all boomed a melodic laugh.

Irina charmed me with an "Oh honey, these will go down much lighter and smoother than any human blood." Each of the women grabbed a drink and Aunt Tanya held her glass up.

"To Alice and Jasper, may they have a forever happiness, even if they do insist on getting married. And to Bella, welcome to our home. Cheers!"

After a proper clinking of glasses, I raised my glass and took a tentative sip. It was absolutely divine -light and sweet.

"What is that?" I blurted out, putting the glass back up to my lips and drinking down more.

"Do you like it?" asked Irina. ¨Do you really?¨

"It's delicious!" I beamed before draining my glass. Irina handed me another.

"Well this, my dear, is the creation of Kate here. Have you ever donated blood?" she asked.

"Yes, in college.¨

"When blood is donated to blood banks they actually run it through a machine to separate the parts. And because I understand you are studying under Carlisle we'll test you on that…" she smirked.

I was still drinking down my delicious drink when I realized she was staring at me… "Oh right! Uhh...So you've got your red blood cells, white blood cells, platelets, and plasma."

The girls all seemed exuberant at my basic ninth grade biology knowledge and yelled cackles of celebration. "That's it! See that! Now we can let Carlisle know how much of your medical knowledge you were able to use this weekend. So after some experimenting we realized that we could drink the parts of the blood separately mixed with grain alcohol and some other flavorings to achieve specialty drinks for ourselves with no harm done to our diet or our control,¨ Kate explained.

Then Carmen interjected, "But watch out! It gets absorbed directly into our bloodstream so it hits you kind of quickly!"

¨Come now, let's head out to the patio and relax,¨ Aunt Tanya said. Irina and Carmen followed her. I lingered in place still marveling at the drink.

"So the Bloody Harrys are red cell concoctions?" I asked Kate.

"Absolutely!" Kate laughed. ¨Follow me,¨ she said, leading the way to out back.

"But. . .why don't you call it a Bloody Mary?" I heard myself asking the question but wasn't sure if I really wanted to know, thinking there might be some alternate story that explained the name of the drink prior to the 1920s.

Kate stopped.

"Ahh, you see, Tanya's husband's name was Harold. Are you familiar with the story?" Yes, I nodded and smirked, realizing Aunt Tanya did not have a clean track record; Carlisle had truly empowered her enough to exact revenge.

"Wow! That is just absolutely amazing that you were able to figure this all out." I turned to Alice. "Alice, why don't the Cullens ever take advantage of this?"

Alice answered, "Well we have, but not in social ways. Not yet anyway. You got an extra dose of platelets in your newborn cocktail over that first week. Carlisle had been given research stating that it would assist the venom in healing the wounds."

"Oh." Carlisle and his research. The wounds. Maybe their drinks could heal internal scars.

I turned back to Kate, "What kind of platelet specialty drink do you have?"

"We do a few variations. My favorite is a platini, shaken not stirred of course, but we are out of platelets right now. Our platelet supply is usually on the smaller side. I'm going to go make another batch up of the plasmapolitans, though." She had led us out the door to the back of the house. Turning to the rest of the group, she smiled. ¨I think our new friend here is going to partake wholeheartedly in our fun with us." She winked at me and nodded to the other girls.

We sat outside on a large patio with modern, stylish furniture around a large fire pit that overlooked a pool. They had to be the only house in the area with an in-ground pool and a housing structure around it. I listened to various stories of the women—how their group came to be and how they have continued to live a peaceful existence among the humans. The conversation took an interesting turn when the subject of Aunt Tanya's favorite male conquests came about. Aunt Tanya had absolutely no qualms about her conquests and proudly recited story after story.

"Jack Kennedy? As in the president?" I asked.

"The very same, while he was back in college, though. He was quite smitten with me, actually. I gave him one of history's most famous quotes. When I had him in a dark basement of a fraternity house, he asked me a question about what I was going to do with him. And I told him, Ask not what I can do for you, but what you can do for me. Obviously," she winked, ¨he recycled that line later.¨

"Speaking of smitten, our Bella here has a human admirer," Alice chirped out for everyone to know, much to my embarrassment.

Tanya exclaimed with bright eyes in reaction, "Really! Well now you are talking my language. I just love the warmth and pulse and, ooooh, the eagerness of a human male."

"Well, I mean, he's just visiting Forks on business and doesn't really know anyone else. He doesn't even really know me. But anyway, he'll be returning to his home once his business is done," I replied.

"Perfect, perfect! No strings attached! And tell me, did he ask you out?" Aunt Tanya probed.

Alice piped up, "Oh Bella you have to play that message for them."

"Alice, I don't really think that is necessary."

"Oh for the love of Plasmapolitans, it is necessary!" Aunt Tanya spoke in her sultry voice. ¨Let's hear it. You can tell a lot about a man from his voice!¨

I pulled out my phone dialed into the voicemail and hit the speaker button.

"Bella, hey...it's Ed...I mean Edward… Edward Masen. I know I said I was booked all weekend long, but I've had a few cancels and reschedules. I'd really love to see you sooner than we planned. The cookies are uhh, in a word, out-of-this-world," he laughed. "Count that as one word. Really, they're great, but I'm gorging on them alone when I'd rather be sharing them with you. Call me."

Alice giggled. ¨Wow...did you hear how his voice went deeper when he said that last bit? I bet cookies aren't the only thing he'd like to share with you.¨ The girls all laughed.

I kept my eyes down as I disconnected from the voicemail. "I guess I really should call him to let him know I'm out of town for the weekend."

With that Tanya snatched the phone from me. "You'll do no such thing!"

"What, why?" I asked stunned at her strong reaction.

Tanya proceeded to explain herself. "Honey, take it from the original succubus, men love the chase. They love it," she said in a sing-song way and exaggerated the statement with jazz hands. "You don't call him until Monday! Better yet Wednesday! It will do him a world of good to have to sit around and think about you—ponder where you are—and not to mention what you're doing without him this weekend. Give him a chance to imagine some other guy is benefiting from your attention right now. Let him get himself a bit worked up. Calling him back now would only kill the chase."

"I don't know, that doesn't really sound like me."

Tanya winked at me. "Maybe it doesn't sound like the old Bella, but baby-girl, make no mistake about it, you're a goddess now and you just have to flaunt it, taunt 'em, and reel'em in!"

"How do you make it seem like getting physical with humans is so easy?"

The girls laughed. "Well alcohol helps them. But otherwise, you just have to shock the hell at them. Make it so they don't know what hit them. Throw a guy against a wall. Pin him against his car. Pull him into a dark closet. Get his head spinning so he can't think straight. Trust me, as long as you're the one making the first move, he'll surrender. You don't need subtle seduction just an ostentatious advance. And then my dear, that man with the awfully sexy voice - or any man for that matter - will be putty in your hands."

The girls all roared. "I'll drink to that" I heard and then glasses clinked. I zoned out for a minute wondering how easy it could be with Edward Masen.

"But don't we feel cold to them?"

"Sure, but that is why the alcohol and catching them off guard helps. They get so consumed with lust that they find a way to dismiss anything else that they might ordinarily question. Some of them are way too mesmerized by our beauty to even give it a second thought. By the time you are done with them the coldness is not the last thing they would have felt. Know what I mean, jellybeanz?" She grinned.

"But if you were to be dating a human…" I continued.

Irina broke in, "Sweetie we mate, not date. Anything before that is just for our own pleasure."

"Well now that is usually the case sister,¨ Carmen added, ¨but maybe it shall be different for Bella. She is still technically a newborn let us not forget."

Kate spoke up. "Well there is one thing I've been working on that may help."

"Ahhh, you see Kate is our resident chemist. Do tell. Do tell," Aunt Tanya encouraged.

"It was an incidental really of a project I was working on. You see, I was researching a way to help us blend better into society in warmer regions and I was trying to improve the paleness of our skin. You know how we glisten in the sunlight?"

I nodded, following along.

"Well I was trying to find a way to tone all that sparkle stuff down, you know like put a dimmer switch on it, but it never really worked out. What I did discover, though is that if you introduce keratin into our systems, it helps to improve the color of our skin, brings it up to a more natural fleshy tone. We can look less pale.¨

"Does it work?" I asked.

"Oh yes, it is still somewhat experimental, but as of now, it doesn't have lasting effects. You have to maintain a steady diet of the keratin in order to keep up that appearance."

"One of our girls is using it right now. She's part of a ballet company that had a chance to travel south. She's actually returning home soon, said she was stopping through your area on the way home to check into getting a new hot rod for herself now that the tour she was on is over. Pity you'll have missed meeting her. Our Rosie is beautiful and smart. She's a wonderful dancer. She's done well with us, though I fear her heart is ready to move on.¨

¨Is she one of your recruits?¨

Four sets of eyes stared over at me. ¨Recruits?¨ Irina laughed. ¨Oh Tanya, the way your brother must spin stories. If he was Rumplestiltskin he'd surely spin lead instead of gold!¨

I was handed another drink, and Aunt Tanya came to sit by me. ¨It's true, we do take opportunity to help other vampires, especially young ones because we try to promote the lifestyle we lead. Let me correct myself, I'm referring to the way we only eat animals.¨

¨You see,¨ Kate took over. ¨If vampires ravaged the land eating all the humans, they'd deprive Tanya and Hollywood here of all their human conquests.¨

Irina giggled. ¨We can't have that happen!¨

¨No, Hollywood, we can't.¨ Aunt Tanya confirmed. ¨You see young Bella, many vampires have come through here and feel lost, the same as I'm sure you've felt. We have no problem sharing our wisdom and experience. It doesn't always land on eager ears, though. We've had a few come through that may have learned how to hone self-control around the humans but refused the vegetarian way.¨

¨Oh that last redhead was having none of it! We shudder to think what she's out there doing. We greatly underestimated her intentions,¨ Kate sighed. ¨Such a waste!¨

¨Yes, sister, but imparting our views on others of our kind is always a fifty-fifty type thing. Still, I'm not unhappy with those that have been able to go on and do so well. Look at Esme!¨

¨Wait, Esme was...¨

¨Yes, dear! We initiated her through this group, and then I introduced her to my brother. It was the best thing to ever happen to him. Interesting how things work out sometimes, isn't it?¨ Aunt Tanya glowed. I turned to Alice who was happily situated on a lounger. She smiled in return with a quick nodding of her head. Alice took the time to tell everyone that Esme said hello. I thought back to the wink she gave Carlisle this morning when she tried to assure him the influence of these women wasn't all bad. I giggled internally. She was talking about herself. And Carlisle. So many things still to learn about my family and this life and how to go about the day to day of forever. . .

My head swirled and I had to take a seat on the lounger next to Alice, extending all of my jelly limbs. I could barely muster up the strength to use my vampire speed, instead shuffling over at a pace that would be considered slow even for a human.

¨Come now girls, let's let our new friend here sit back and enjoy her inebriated state for now and we'll prepare for a late night hunt.¨

My hand held my head and I whimpered slightly. Thoughts of calling Edward Masen seemed all jumbled up with thoughts of being with him and staying away from him or letting him think I had the attention of other guys. None of it would settle into spaces in my mind in an order that made any sense. Instead it was like having fifty ping pong balls all being bounced and batted back and forth through my mind though they somehow never collided.

¨Alice, I feel so weird. Light and mixed up.¨

¨Isn't it lovely?¨ she responded laying on the lounger as if she were a human working on a suntan. ¨It comes and goes quickly so enjoy it now.¨

Twilight had passed, and the night sky settled in. I could see the stars so much more clearly in Denali. I looked trying to focus on a star, knowing I could never make out the various constellations. ¨You know if Emmett were here, he'd be able to show you all the constellations, starting with Ursa Major," Alice said.

I giggled. ¨That's Emmett, always has his eye out for the largest bear he can find!¨ I laughed more. ¨Oh my God, do you hear me? Me and myself talking just sounds so messed up.¨

¨Just enjoy it, Bella,¨ Alice pleaded again.

¨They're not going to take me to a bar to make me test out their suggestions are they? Because if so, I'd really, really want Edward Masen to be at that bar.¨

¨No silly! But we should go to a bar to watch them in action.¨

¨Aunt Tanya and Irina are like the Samantha Jones and Carrie Bradshaw of the West Coast, aren't they?¨

¨A pop culture reference! Oh Bella, yes they are!¨

I tried to whisper. ¨Alice, why do they call Irina, Hollywood?¨

¨HA!¨ Alice bellowed a laugh.

Suddenly Irina was standing there. Tall, beautiful, eyes that sparkled and a sinful smile on her face as well as a tray in her hand. ¨Another drink?¨she offered, to which Alice and I both accepted.

Irina pulled up a chair to sit beside us. ¨Allow me to explain my nickname. It's quite simple actually. In my human life, I was a far cry from how I look now. I grew up in an era of thick Coke-bottle glasses that I needed to wear to see and a face that was horribly hidden by acne. I was the oldest of seven, and I had to help raise my younger siblings. Within my family, I knew who I was and what my responsibilities were. But in school, I was treated horribly. I believe the term they use these days is bullied for the way I looked. My mother and I handmade our clothes too, so I was far from sporting anything fashionable. The popular boys never paid me any attention at all. So once I became a vampire and had all this," she motioned up and down from her face to her feet, ¨I sought out the popular people. I needed to find out if I could command their attention.¨

¨And by popular people you mean?¨ I asked.

¨I mean the stars. . .in Hollywood.¨

¨Ahhh, I see now,¨ I said, preparing to hear how it went.

"So, I've been all through Hollywood over the years, like the respectable slut I am." She laughed casually.

¨Share a few with her,¨ urged Alice.

¨Well, a lady doesn't really kiss and tell, but I'm not much of a lady." Again, Irina donned that smile of sin. ¨Let's see...over the years there's been Frank Sinatra. Pfft...don't know why ladies got their panties in a tizzy over him. His best asset was his ability to croon but he was a lousy drunk. There was Stallone.¨ Irina laughed. ¨He was a lot of man to handle. The gloves were definitely left off when it came to me with that one. Then there was Eddie Murphy. I feel sorry for the human women who've had to put up with his jokes during sex. For me, I knew it kept him distracted but ugh, what I had to endure during that encounter! Thank goodness it was pre-Shrek donkey voice! Who else, let me think. Oh! Keanu Reeves. Ah yes, I gave him the ultimate excellent adventure. And Julia Roberts has nothing on me! She may have dated both Kiefer Sutherland and Jason Patric but back in the 80s, I gave those Lost Boys an authentic vampire experience. At. The. Same. Time.¨

My drink was finished and I about rolled off the lounger in laughter. ¨You're killing me!¨

¨Who else?" Alice begged. ¨Tell us more!¨

¨John Travolta. That man was suffering from a case of Saturday night fever and I was his cure one weekend. Though, between me and you, I think the rumors about him are true, not that it hindered my experience. I got what I needed from him. He just happened to be the one that I wanted . . .that night.¨

Alice and I threw in a sing-song, ¨Ooh, ooh, ooh!¨ to complement her story.

¨I'd have to say my most well known, er, conquest was someone you might know well from the news these last few years. Although, this was a while back, before Angelina." Irina smirked at the look on my face as I realized who it was she was referring to. "Don't confuse 'well known' with 'enjoyable' though. To be honest, Brad was kind of a disappointment. Very...vanilla." Irina handed me another drink and almost seemed to wait until I took another sip before she added with a wink, "Now, Jennifer, on the other hand, was quite enjoyable."

I half choked on the Plasmapolitan before just gulping the whole thing down.

¨Do you see now why Jazz isn't thrilled about me coming up here?¨ Alice asked. ¨He thinks I'm going to have excursions with Irina or Aunt Tanya that will end badly for us.¨ Ahh, yes, now his little hissy fit made more sense.

¨He's just showing some insecurity. No worries, I don't need a wing girl.¨ Irina smiled. ¨Though my days of Hollywood have slowed down. I've more than made up for my human life, proved to myself over and over that I can get exactly who I want. I just never wanted anything long-term with any of them. Maybe someday that will change but for now, I feel fulfilled. Do you feel fulfilled with the prospect of marriage to Jasper?¨

¨I do,¨ Alice replied.

¨Good,¨ said Irina. ¨And that leaves you, Bella, and figuring out what in this life will fulfill you.¨

¨That is the question.¨

¨You don't need to figure it out this weekend, though. And with those drinks in you, you won't figure out much of anything.¨ Irina laughed, hugged me and then disappeared into the house.

Not long, out sauntered Kate. She plopped herself down in the chair that Irina had been sitting in and told us she was enjoying our visit. Her attention was more directed to Alice. ¨Anything more?¨ she asked.

Alice simply shook her head before saying how sorry she was.

¨It's okay. I'm just going to keep on hoping.¨

¨Here, let me try again.¨ Alice reached out and placed her hands over Kate's. She closed her eyes. ¨No, nothing.¨

I looked at them both expectantly before Kate broke down and explained that her biology experiments were merely a distraction while she waits for her love, Garrett, to return to her. ¨He's on the run from the Volturi, and I haven't heard from him in a year.¨

Ahh, there's that name again. The Volturi. ¨So, he's a vampire?¨

¨Yes. One of us. He left with only a note not to follow him. He didn't want to put me in harm's way. In all my experimentation, I'm really trying to find something so useful to the Volturi that I can offer it up in exchange for his freedom so that we can be together again. I feel like I'm onto something big, but I don't know if handing over something powerful to them will ultimately hurt our covens.¨

¨Do they know about your cocktails?¨ I asked.

¨No, and I'm pretty sure I'd have to offer them more than this to buy Garrett's freedom.¨

¨What is it that they are after Garrett for?¨ I persisted curious about the circumstance. ¨What did he do?¨

¨He came across some information. Witnessed they had their hands in their own kind of experimentation. He wouldn't tell me much about it. If I were to ever come up against Aro, he could read my mind and know whatever Garrett knows. They want him dead, but Garrett has stayed underground.¨

¨I've only ever had one vision of Garrett,¨ Alice offered quietly. ¨He was calling Kate and telling her that he was safe and that he was coming back to her.¨ Kate smiled over at Alice.

¨He hasn't made that phone call yet, but at least that is something to go on. I feel like it means I'm going to figure out something that will be powerful enough to the Volturi to exchange it for Garrett's life. I just don't know when or what.¨

¨I'm sure you will,¨ I said hopefully.

¨In the meantime, it's hard being away from him, but I'm so thankful to have my friends, my family. . .including new members!¨ Kate hugged me and welcomed me again. ¨Especially ones who enjoy my latest concoctions. If you ever need anything dear, let me know.¨

Ï nodded to her with a thank you as she stood and commented on the way the moonlight glistened on the surface of the pool. ¨I know he's out there, looking at the moon too when he gets a chance, thinking of me. We have a bond.¨

A bond. All of this talk made we want to sneak off to call Edward. Just as I was about to excuse myself, Carmen joined us, pulling up another chair. The hours were passing so quickly. She asked if Alice had brought about good news of Garrett but was given the answer solemnly. Carmen told Kate not to worry and that they would come to a solution together. Carmen shared with us her history of growing up in South America without a mother, and a father who built things. ¨I did not have regular toys or dolls growing up, so I learned to tinker with my father's tools. I'm the one that fixes things here around the house and sometimes build things. When I became a young woman, I found my talent in my artwork and my voice. I paint and I love to sing, so occasionally I travel and sing shows in clubs. Nothing too mainstream, as I have no desire for stardom. Just a small audience and a stage is all I need on any given night.¨

¨Sure, that's all you need,¨ Kate jabbed her.

¨Sometimes," she smiled, ¨I admit I need the male companionship of one of those audience members. You see Bella, in my country, I was captured and cruelly turned into a vampire by someone who wanted me as his mate. I wanted nothing to do with Laurent, told him I already loved another. My words enraged him, and he left me a newborn on my own to fend for myself. Realizing what I had become after my first kill, I went back for my fiance, but when I returned to him, he was horrified. I ran off into the forest by my home I struggled with the decision before realizing what I had to do. I had to turn him into one of us so that we might be together, whether he wanted it or not. I waited for nightfall planning to change him, but when I returned to him, it was too late. I had led Laurent to him, and he had killed him, taken him away from me forever. My Tomas!¨ She signed and placed her hand over her heart. ¨Ah, but this was many moons ago.¨

¨And you still miss him?¨ I wondered.

¨Yes, but I am at peace with it now with the help of a friend.¨ She smiled at Alice.

¨Alice?¨ I looked at her.

¨No, it was Esme. She and I found our way to Tanya and Kate about the same time and have been great friends ever since then. Somehow she channels Tomas' spirit and that's allowed me to communicate with him. He has assured me that he is at peace and I am here half-living, waiting for some mysterious tall, dark and handsome man to arrive in my life, per Alice.¨ She laughed.

¨I've seen it. It's going to happen,¨ Alice declared passionately because Carmen expressed doubt with her laugh.

Carmen waived her off. ¨Yes, yes, in my country, we have many a street fortune teller growing up, and I continue to take a wait-and-see attitude. In the meantime, I take a charitable approach to helping the lives of others, often by joining forces with Esme. You may see me at an upcoming charity dinner that we are planning to benefit your hospital in Forks.¨

Aunt Tanya and Irina had rejoined us outside. ¨Shall we hunt? We have many wonderful sights to show you Bella, and after the cocktails, a bit of animal blood serves as a nice chaser.¨ We all agreed that was a good idea, and I was actually up for the exploration of new land to break up the monotony of the Forks countryside.

I knew now why Alice had brought me here. All of these women had their own interesting stories proving how they had found their way as vampires. I spent the rest of the weekend immersed in their little area of the world, enjoying the sites and smells of the land, as well as witnessing them using their own vampire talents. And almost as if it was meant to be, while in the woods, we came upon a young newborn, shaking and desperate to quench her thirst. The Denalis immediately helped her drain a large elk and offered her a place with them. She told us her name was Bree, but couldn't share much else.

¨Is she going to be okay?¨ I asked as Alice and I packed up the car for our return trip.

¨I think so. This is what they do. You see it worked out for Esme,¨ Alice quipped.

¨They're wonderful, Alice, and I'm so happy to have met them all. You sneaky troll, I know now what you were doing with this trip.¨

¨Did it work?" she beamed and clasped her hands together, grinning widely. ¨Did you decide what you are going to do about him?¨

¨Maybe." I smiled. Maybe it worked too well, as I was so distracted that I forgot about calling Edward Masen back.

~x~

On Sunday night, we had said our goodbyes and expressed well wishes and gotten back on the road. I was due in for 2 am rounds with Carlisle but I felt so sluggish. I had never missed being able to sleep more than I did now.

¨Hey Alice, did you happen to see the picture of Rosie?¨

¨Yep, petite and pretty. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?¨

¨That a blonde vampire who likes hot rod cars might be perfect for Emmett?¨I asked.

¨Bingo!¨

¨Is there any way we can get them together?¨

¨Well no guarantees, but we must end up being friends with her in some way because she was there in the vision of my wedding.¨ Alice shrugged. ¨I had wondered who she was.¨

A/N:

***This is a little ode to how book Esme who Carlisle found after she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a cliff. Just a little Double entendre.

Thanks to my friend Danielle who contributed the Brad Pitt section of this chapter and was willing to give me some feedback. :-)

So now, how do you think Bella will proceed with Edward? Will she take Aunt Tanya's advice or not?

I hope you liked seeing the Denali women as more of the Sex and the City girls, and I'm hoping it was a little bit of a different spin on them then what we usually find in fanfiction. Don't worry Tanya will never have any special interest in Edward in this story.