It was hard for Haruka to talk after what had happened. Not that he really talked that much in the first place, but Makoto definitely noticed that something had changed. However, Makoto was accepting of this, because he was expecting much worse to of come out of it. But so far, all that has happened was Haruka seeing a doctor to get himself patched up and both of them having a separate, unscheduled session with Mrs. Amakata. Obviously Makoto did not know what they had talked about, but she had basically asked him about how the situation made him feel and how he handled it in the moment and stuff like that. She also asked about where the item that he had done it with was, but Makoto didn't answer that.

Mrs. Amakata had sighed and ended the session, seeming to know that she wouldn't be able to get Makoto to talk if he didn't want to. Though he did expect her to complain about him not telling her about what she had asked, he figured that the session was certainly more successful than some past ones had been all in all. It'd be bad to push her luck to force him to talk.

Makoto had gotten up and left the room without saying any more to her.

Even Nitori noticed that something was different about them, even though Makoto was trying not to act like it. It made Makoto feel bad, because he didn't really want to tell Nitori, partially for his own sake (he certainly didn't need more stuff to worry about) and partially because it wasn't his business to tell anyway. So instead he tried to make something up, but he was pretty sure that Nitori saw through it anyway.

Later on, Matsuoka also came up to Makoto while he was waiting in line to get dinner and asked him what was going on. He said his reason was because it was really making Nitori worry (which Makoto didn't doubt was part of the reason), but he couldn't help but feel with the way that Matsuoka was acting that he cared at least a little as well. However, that did not stop Makoto from telling him the same exact lie that he had told Nitori.

Through all of this Makoto really started to wonder what was going through Haruka's head that he did not know about. He just could not understand how he could feel so horrible to drive himself to doing that, and then to keep on doing it, even though it hurt. Certainly he had heard about it helping people release their emotions or something like that, but he never known anyone who believed it.

It also did not help that he just could not understand the idea in the first place. Sure, there were plenty of painful things going on in his mind now, but he wasn't sure they would ever make him want to physically harm himself on purpose like that.

But then he thought of something. What if Haruka was the same way at first? What if he had heard that it was a thing and thought he could try it himself and see if it worked for him? What if at first he was also confused about it, like Makoto was, but thought he had nothing to lose if it didn't work and decided to give it a try as well? And then as it turned out it did help him release some stress or whatever it was for him and so he got addicted to the feeling and therefore got addicted to self-harm.

This was the only explanation Makoto could come up with. And with that conclusion… he decided he wanted to try it as well.

He was convinced that it would not do anything for him, but that did not stop him from wanting to try. After all, on the off chance that it did do something, then he would be able to understand Haruka more and be able to help him. Besides, given the place they were in, it's not like he would be able to get addicted to it anyway. Not without someone noticing, at least.

And so he did. He waited until after dinner was finished and he went into his room. Quietly closing the door behind him, he went over to his bed, sat down and pulled the nail Haruka had used previously out from underneath his pillow. He was sort of surprised to find that it was still there, and was a little glad about it, but at the same time not so much. He wanted to go through with this so that he could understand Haruka, but at the same time he was scared about the results.

He closed his eyes and sighed, taking a few deep breaths. He wanted to think about where he would do it so there was the least percent chance of him being found out. So, obviously, his arms were out. And he figured anywhere on his torso would hurt worse than most other places. He remembered Haruka's thighs being far worse than everything else. Maybe there would be the best place? Makoto wasn't entirely sure, so he just went with that.

With understandably shaky hands Makoto pulled his pants down a little. He looked at the nail and lightly placed it against his skin. Already his stomach was beginning to churn and he was barely feeling anything yet. It didn't help that the nail was starting to rust. But he had already come this far, and it wasn't like he would be able to find something else he could do this with. Not in a place like this. He gulped, squeezing his eyes shut. It took some last second convincing before he was able to jerk his hand to the side.

Almost instantly his entire thigh was covered in a stinging pain, and he had only made a scratch. When he opened his eyes he could see that he was barely even bleeding. Despite the pain that he definitely felt, he didn't think that it was enough. Haruka was able to do ten- no- a hundred times worse than this over and over again. He had to do at least a little more.

He placed the nail against himself again, this time harder than before, and quickly and more forcefully dragged it over the previous scratch. He bit down on his lip so that he did not make any noise. He had done so little in comparison and already he thought he was going to throw up.

Maybe one more. Just one more. Maybe Makoto just hadn't done enough yet for the feeling to settle in. That would make sense, right? Maybe? At this point Makoto was just grasping at straws.

Once more he placed down the nail, this time even harder than the last, and without giving himself the chance to hesitate, ripped it across his skin and unintentionally making a larger mark than before. Even though his tightly clenched teeth he could not help but whimper. Blood began to surface immediately and slowly started to drip down the side of his leg. And he still did not get it. How could Haruka willingly put himself through such a horrible feeling over and over again? It seemed that no matter what or how hard he tried, he just could not grasp it.

"Makoto?" The voice scared Makoto, despite how quiet it had been. His heart dropped into his stomach as he looked towards the doorway where the sound had come from. There Haruka was standing with a horrified look on his face. Slowly he stepped in and, without taking his wide eyes away from Makoto, closed the door behind him.

"What are you doing?" Haruka asked him, even though he obviously knew the answer.

"I-It's nothing." Makoto lied anyway, trying to pull up his pants to conceal his injuries. However, as soon as they touched the fabric they started to be stained red, thus making it more obvious.

"You call that nothing?!" Haruka immediately got louder as he stepped closer to Makoto.

"It's really nothing." Makoto continued to talk calmly, "I just… I didn't mean it like that."

"Didn't mean it like what? Not that that matters, because either way you hurt yourself and that is a horrible thing!"

"Haruka, it's okay, you don't have to-"

"Do NOT tell me not to worry about it! You worry about me all the time, so I should be allowed to worry about you, too!"

"But I really didn't mean it in that way!"

"Then in what way did you mean it? Why would you do such a thing? Haven't you learned from me?"

"It's because I wanted to understand why you do it that I did!"

"It's because you-" Haruka stopped and his eyes went wide. "Be-...cause you-..." He tried to finish, but trailed off again. He slowly sat down next to Makoto on the bed and looked at him with tears beginning to form in his eyes. "You just… want to understand?"

"Yes." Makoto sighed, glad that the tone of the situation had calmed down so much before it could get worse. In fact, it seemed that at least most of Haruka's anger had completely disappeared.

His hands trembled as Haruka reached and out pulled down Makoto's pants a little so that he could see the damage that was done. Makoto could easily tell that it made him feel bad about it, because his tears began to fall more rapidly.

"I'm sorry." Makoto mumbled to try and comfort him.

"Don't apologize to me." Haruka immediately replied, "I'm the one who should apologize, I'm the one who made you do this."

"Hey." Makoto said more sternly. He took Haruka's head in both of his hands and made him look him in the eyes. "You did not make me do this." He said as clear as possible, "I did not do this out of impulse, because I wanted to cause myself pain, okay? I had been thinking about it and thought maybe it would help me understand you better so that I can help you." He smiled and let his hands drop, "Unfortunately I still don't get it, because it really hurts and I never want to do this again, but at least that means you won't have to worry about it, right?"

Haruka seemed to think about it for a second before looking away and nodding.

Makoto sighed and pulled his pants back up. "So what should we do about this?" He said, holding out the rusty nail.

"You used that?"

Makoto blinked, "Well what else would I have used?"

"B-but…! What if it get's infected?!"

Makoto shrugged, "Then it get's infected. This is a hospital, so it's not like it's that big of a deal."

"But-"

"It's not a big deal. Like I said, if something does happen, then it shouldn't be that hard to deal with, right?" Haruka did not seem convinced, but still he agreed anyway.

A/N: So I don't actually know what they would do to someone who self-harmed while in the hospital for sure, but I know someone who works in a jail and she says that they wouldn't do much the first time, unless they actually tried to kill themselves. But if they did do that or if it happened again, the person would have to wear a restricting jacket.

Sorry nothing much really happens in this chapter, but thanks to a certain review, I wanted to get something out soon. Hopefully I can get another, more plot related chapter out soon!