A/N: Ready?
Disclaimer: All original characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.
A Guiding Heart
Hart to Hart
Chapter 27
"I feel like I got hit by a fucking bus," Edward declared. "But I'm not gonna lie, doc...the sight of you eases it. I can't believe you traveled all the way to . . ." Edward stopped and looked around his room. "Where am I again? Back in Chicago, right?"
I wasn't prepared to keep lying to Edward. "Let me get the doctor," I said.
I left the room and called Garrett, telling him that Edward thought he was in Chicago. He told me it was best to keep up the charade for now. "Fine, but don't sedate him any longer," I insisted. I followed Garrett into the room, and he asked Edward a bunch of questions and checked his vitals. In a quick voice only I could hear, Garrett muttered it was amazing.
"I want up out of this bed," Edward demanded from Garrett.
"Easy there Edward, you've been quite sick. I'm amazed at your improved condition, but do keep in mind that you're weak."
"Doc-tor . . .?"
"Davis," Garrett provided the answer.
"Right. I need to get the hell up and out of this bed!" Edward told Garrett, and I laughed softly at the sight. "See, she's already laughing at me."
"Edward doesn't do well staying still in hospitals," I told Garrett with a smile. "And once he knows he's better, he's not one to stay in bed." Edward shot me a loaded look, as if to say 'well not alone, anyway' to which I rolled my eyes at.
"Please Doctor, I need a hot shower, some food, and to be unhooked from all of this. My own personal Doc Bella here will keep an eye on me while I'm in the shower, won't you?" Both of them raised an expectant eyebrow to me.
"Fine." After conceding, Garrett began unhooking Edward's IV and other tubes. He grumbled something about patients knowing more than doctors. Garrett threw me a quick wink then carefully placed plastic over the remaining tubing inserted in Edward that would be exposed to water. "But after the shower you are going back on the monitor."
Garrett helped Edward stand and made sure he was solid on his legs before I followed them to the on-suite. After giving Edward the okay, he said he would go see about his hot meal, leaving Edward up to me. I made sure he had a toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, shampoo, a washcloth and towel.
I looked at the color in his cheeks and the light in his eyes. "I'm fine," he said knowing I was examining him. "I just want to get this shitty feeling of hospital funk off me so I can hold you." He kissed me quickly on the cheek and whispered, "I knew you'd come. I won't take long," with a nod out the door, which I took as my queue to leave him.
Edward talked a good game in terms of his bravado, but in the end, he was still human who needed moments of privacy and modesty. I walked out, closing the bathroom door behind me and went to changing the bedding. Once I heard the shower water running, I peeked my head into the bathroom where I found Edward humming.
Garrett returned while Edward was in the shower, bringing some snacks and water on a tray. He set it down, then with the touch of a keypad on the wall, I watched as half the room transformed into more of a hotel suite than a hospital room. "Wow," I exclaimed. "That is really cool."
"Look, Edward can't go anywhere yet. I'm not sure how much Carlisle told you, but as long as you're here, I wanted you both to be comfortable. There's a call button if you need anything."
"Thank you, Garrett. Any word from Kate?"
"No, but I know she's working on something."
"With that family, I'm sure they all are. She'll come up with something. She loves you too much not to," I assured him.
He smiled at me with his towering frame. "That woman is a Godsend, and I'm far from deserving of her. There's a supply of blankets in that cabinet and even clean clothes for you if you desire them."
As we heard the water turn off, Garrett excused himself and told me to ring when I thought Edward was ready for more substantial food or if I needed anything else.
The bathroom door opened and Edward stood there with a towel slung around his waist. "Wow, I never thought I'd feel this good ever again. Let me guess, Doc. You're going to tell me I'm not out of the woods yet. That I need to be careful. No more risks."
I stood up and approached him slowly. "I'm going to say that it's good to see you," I said wanting to wrap him up in a hug and kiss him, but I suddenly felt like I reeked of Justin. Justin. I was one fucked up vampire. Kissing Justin one minute then wanting to be with Edward the next. Edward was weaker. He needed me more right now, I told myself. Justin could survive on his own and we could sort through things later.
"Whoa, what happened to this room?" Edward asked.
"Yeah they kind of opened a wall for you. You must be a star patient." I grinned at him.
"This reminds me a lot of this posh rehab one of my hockey teammates was in once." He grinned back, and I didn't even want to know which of his teammates he was referring to.
I directed him to some clothes that were on a chest of drawers by him, and he dressed quickly, but not so quick that I didn't have time to admire his ass or catch the "v" tattooed on him that I had already seen. Marked, I told myself, by the goddamned Volturi. Why did the one guy I fell for have to be involved?
"Are you waiting for an invitation?" he asked, holding out his arms. "Because if you are, here it is."
"Uhm, no. I just . . . it's been a confusing few days, hasn't it?" I asked him. I fell into his arms, feeling like a cheat. A deceitful cheat who reeked of another man.
"A little bit, but once Carlisle assured me that you'd come as soon as you could tie things up at the hospital with your patients, I knew you would. Every minute my eyes were shut, I was thinking about you, dreaming of us."
Wow! Edward and I had been living completely different lives. I closed my eyes and thought back to all the time I spent with Justin. Did I regret it?
Glancing over at the cabinet with clothes in it that Garrett had pointed out to me, I knew I had to wash Justin and the shame I felt from me.
"I had . . . I came right here after having a lot going on . . ." I pulled away from his embrace.
"And when you got here, I was less than responsive." He walked over and sat down on a light beige couch.
"I just . . . Are you okay? Really okay now?" I asked.
"I don't want to say never better, but yeah, now that you're here."
"I really need a shower then," I said. "It was a long trip. Is that okay with you? And then we need to talk."
"Yeah, I feel like there is something important I need to talk to you about, too, but I don't remember it." He shook his head gently, his eyes searching.
"Maybe it will come to you while I'm in the shower?"
I spotted the backpack Carlisle had brought with us and opened it to see if anything in it was mine. Of course it was! Alice had rooted through the cherry bomb and packed up whatever she found, including Edward's manilla envelope. I pulled it out, holding it up to him.
"Oh there it is! Great, I think I remember looking for that and didn't know what happened to it," Edward said.
"I'm sorry, I hope it didn't hinder your work. I think I had gotten it from the hotel room for you but left it in my car that night I met up with you at my dad's house."
"Something must have distracted you that evening when you got out of the car," he said with a wicked smile that I couldn't resist, remembering how he greeted me in the driveway of my father's house.
"Something. Or someone probably did."
'Maybe it was Eric?" he laughed. Guilt gripped me tightly an his inference of seeing someone from my past.
Garrett entered and directed Edward to a spot closer to the hospital bed, where he began hooking wires back up to him, claiming he could move the equipment so Edward could be more comfortable in the living room section of the suite. Garrett suggested he could bring me more hot rocks to which I agreed. The last thing I heard was Edward protesting as I went to take a shower.
Finally alone with my thoughts in the shower, everything from the past few weeks came crashing down on me. Clinically, Edward was dying. Supernaturally, I was keeping him alive, but with the pooling of venom that occurred sometimes, I was just as big a threat to him. Unless . . . what if I changed him myself? No, that's crazy Bella, you're still a newborn. You wouldn't have the self control. Besides there was still so much Edward wanted to do. So much good that could come out of finishing his Ferris wheel.
I finished showering, brushed my teeth quickly and dressed before warming my hands with the hot rocks Garrett had brought.
When I re-entered, Edward had a game on the tv and was sitting on the couch comfortably, though hooked up to the heart monitor, the manilla envelope opened, and papers in his hand, which he discarded onto the coffee table when he saw me.
"Finally," he muttered as I approached him knowing I felt as warm as I was going to get from the hot water and stones. He pulled me down to him, forcing me to sit across him sideways in his lap.
"Did you remember what you wanted to tell me?" I asked.
He nodded his head like a yes. "No," he smiled taking me into his arms. I sensed he wanted to lean in and kiss me, but I held myself back. "All I did was dream about you the whole time you weren't here."
"You did?" I asked surprised.
"Yeah, I dreamed about us being together." He looked around. "Not like this, not in a posh hospital." He smoothed a few strands of my damp hair behind my ear. He clasped my hand into his and brought it up to his lips, kissing it.
"I dreamed of us making it," he whispered with a smile.
"Making it? Making it where?" I asked.
"Making it . . . as a couple . . . forever." He tapped the earring in my right ear in a silent acknowledgement that I was wearing the gift he gave me. "But that's why it's a dream, Bella, because I don't have forever. I'm not sure if I even have until next year. I've been trying to deny it. It's been so easy to deny it whenever you're around. You make all of this better, but I guess Carlisle told you why I needed to be back here in the hospital."
"He did," I confirmed.
"Bella whatever procedure I consented to for my heart, it was something the doctors convinced the coach and me of trying. It was a last ditch effort to get me back in the game. It's stopped working and my heart just isn't holding up," he said.
"I know. Shhh, you don't have to say the words," I told him, rubbing his arm with soft reassuring strokes. "Carlisle and Dr. Davis and I are going to figure this out. We're going to find a solution."
"I can't ask you to . . . how can I ask you to stay with me? That's the most selfish thing I could ever do."
"It's not. I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere, and as long as I'm with you, you're going to stay strong. You don't have to say another word."
"Good, I don't want to say another word because even two words are two words too many when you're dying to . . . " Edward started before his mouth was on mine, kissing me with the passion and desperation of a reunion. I kissed him back fully at first then faltered with reservation. There was something familiar about what he just said. It was on our date at the ice rink. He had said that then, too, and never finished his thought.
Dying to . . . ? Dying to . . . WHAT?
Garrett arrived with a huge tray full of food for Edward, interrupting us, of course.
"I'm sorry to interrupt, but Edward we really need you to eat and get your strength back up."
Edward smiled at me as, little by little, he disconnected himself from my mouth and arms. Garrett set the tray of food down on the coffee table in front of the sofa before turning to leave.
"Dr. Cullen suggested you two had some kind of beneficial connection," he stated in acknowledgment before leaving us completely.
"I know," said Edward smiling at me. "It's like we knew each other long before we met."
Edward dug into his food after my insistence. While eating, he handed me the contents of the manilla folder and told me to read it, but before I could, I had a strong pang shoot through me, accompanied by a memory.
Justin's young face flashed across my mind.
~flash~
It was outside the pizza place the night Justin had driven me home. He sat to face me on the motorcycle, took a drag of his cigarette, and fanned the smoke across my face.
"I'd say 'thank you,' but that's two words too many when you're dying to kiss someone," he swooned.
Then he leaned in and kissed me.
"Shit!" I jumped up, feeling startled, and stared at Edward.
"What? What is it?" Edward asked, though he had a mouth full of mashed potatoes.
"I- … I- …" I stammered. Shit was I stuttering again? I cleared my throat. "I'm just...I'm just going to go talk to Dr. Davis about something."
"Okay? But you'll be back?"
I recognized the panic in his face, like I finally realized he wasn't worth my time. Like I had changed my mind. I steadied myself and told him that I would return soon.
"Oh, by the way, at least now we solved the mystery of who I had seen in the hospital with eyes similar to yours. Dr. Davis said he was in and out around the time Dr. March performed the procedure on me. I swear it's like I never saw anyone with eyes like yours and now I've seen tons of people. Must be something I just didn't tune into."
I nodded quickly before escaping that room and running down the hall until I reached Garrett. He was in a lounge type room reading though there was beeping.
"Bella. What is it? You look . . . not well."
"I feel like I'm going to throw up!" I exclaimed.
"Well I don't blame you. You've gotten yourself into some kind of complicated situation."
"You're telling me. I don't understand it. I was just . . . Edward . . . " I paused. "He says these things to me sometimes, and I had thought his body was being inhabited ...like short-term taken over...by the ghost of a dead guy who used to say them, you know those exact words, but now I think he repeats things that someone else I knew has said. Because it's like he has memories of something that he can't quite remember, but I do! I'm the one remembering them. Not that I said them. No, I heard them. How does that even make sense? It's like deja-vu to me, except they happened when I was with someone else . . . someone who is one of us now," I said exasperated.
"If you're asking me if you're crazy Bella then I have to say you are not. There's such a thing called memory transference, and it's quite commonly reported in heart transplant patients, which is what I believe you to be experiencing. It's the cells of the organ, in this case the heart, storing and retaining memories from the donor and transferring them to the recipient. It's unprecedented if you ask me how you got yourself caught up between the two of them - the recipient and the donor. How is James doing?"
"How . . . how . . . how do you know about him? About me?"
"Oh I could smell him all over you when you first stepped into this building. I'm quite equipped to remember all of the participants by their scent. I assumed that's why you wanted to shower."
"What participants? How do you think you know him? And what do you mean the donor?"
"The donor of the heart Edward is now rejecting. Bella, as part of my involvement in the Volturi experimentation, it was my job to change the humans after their organs were removed. I remember James well, and I sensed he was in the Forks area as of late. The curious thing to me is that you remember the memories that Edward has. We usually lose our memories in the vampire transformation. So . . . you knew James prior to his being turned?"
My body quivered then shriveled into crisis mode. Justin? "James is … he is...Edward's … he had a … he's a heart donor? My God, tell me that's not what you're saying!"
"Yes, James' heart was removed and placed into Edward. Didn't you know that already?" Garrett look at me confused before glancing over at a monitor and saw a dip in Edward's heart rate. "You better get back in there and work your mojo."
I stared at him blankly in return.
"Bella? Bella?" Garrett reached a hand out to rest on my shoulder. "You're in an unusual position seeing as you know both of them."
"I- … I didn't know, and I don't know ...I mean now that I do know . . . Yes, I've known Justin since we were teenagers. And now...I don't know if I can handle this," I said solemnly, gulping down air that I didn't need.
"You're going to have to, for now anyway. Once Edward falls asleep again, I'll fill in the rest of the blanks for you, but in return, I want you to update me on Justin James. Agreed?"
I nodded and stumbled my way out of the room and back to Edward, who was just finishing his meal and on to dessert.
"Here, read this," he said, handing me the contents of the manilla folder. "There were other reasons I chose the Port Angeles area to return to for my Ferris wheel construction. In some way, I thought it could even solve my medical issues."
I put the papers down as Garrett entered the room with more hot rocks in a bowl. I let my hands warm up then returned to Edward's side, placing my hands on his chest.
"How do you feel?" Garrett asked.
"Better," Edward said. "Ready to leave."
"Oh you can't do that just yet." Garrett took Edward's tray away and the bowl of rocks.
Edward smiled at me. "It was worth a try, right? I've never been in a hospital before where a doctor is the one to bring you your food," he laughed. I leaned my head down, placing my ear to Edward's chest, listening to his heart. Justin's heart? Didn't it all make sense now? The nostalgia I felt from the moment I first tuned into the heartbeat at the mall? Anticipating seeing Justin that first night I met Edward in the hospital? Not being able to stay away from him? The memory flashes Edward admitted to having out of nowhere. Memories that sometimes I remembered but he didn't. Even the most recent attribute I learned of Justin's- reciting Shakespeare? I felt myself grimace at the thought of that. Anything Edward had said but didn't know why he said it, where it came from - it was from Justin.
Memory transference, as Garrett called it. Memories held in a cellular level, transferred when Edward received Justin's heart. Buh-dum buh-dum buh-dum
Edward lightly stroked my hair, moving loose strands away from my face. "Have you had enough of listening yet?" Edward asked.
"Sorry," I said, pulling away.
"What is it?" he asked, taking my chin in his hand.
"It's . . . nothing," I smiled at him, lying and swallowing hard. "I know it has only been less than a week, but I feel like I've been away from you for longer."
"Me too, but I'm excited to take you around Chicago." He pecked me on the lips. "Did you read the papers yet?"
"No," I said.
"Then go ahead." He yawned then admitted the small amount of exertion of energy to take a shower and eat made him tired again. As he laid on the couch, he began to close his eyes."
"Wait, Edward, do you remember the last text you sent me? You asked me why didn't I tell you. Tell you what?" I asked.
"I'm trying to think . . . I don't remember," he said sleepily.
"Edward, why did you visit the Jennings' home?"
His eyes fluttered. "Oh, to find him."
"Find who?" I asked, but Edward was already asleep.
I covered Edward with a blanket gently before picking up the papers from the manilla envelope and reading them. No! No! No, no, no, no! I screamed to myself and was just about to zoom down to talk to Garrett when I heard Edward mumbling in his sleep.
"Tiffany," he mumbled then laughed in a way I knew all too well. "Wait up," he laughed again in his sleep.
I rolled my eyes, half disgusted. I guess he was done dreaming about me! With the papers in my hand, I reached Garrett telling him Edward was asleep.
"He's been saying her name a lot in his sleep," Garrett offered up then showed me the camera monitors. He had been watching us.
Ugh.
I pushed the papers in front of Garrett. "Read this!"
Garrett skimmed the papers quickly then chuckled to himself slightly. "No wonder he was such a good match. We don't do many heart transplants Bella because there really are several points that the heart has to match. This explains the matchup."
"It doesn't explain why Edward doesn't know he had a full-blown heart transplant, though. He thinks he had a few different procedural attempts to repair his heart."
"It was part of the experimentation in some. The psychological part. The belief was that keeping it from the patient would allow their body to heal, void of any psychological or mental disorders like depression or anxiety. It didn't always work, especially when the patient began developing memories from the donor. Edward's coach was calling the shots. He would have sold his own soul to have Edward well enough to play hockey again. Essentially, he did."
"But I've seen the scar on Edward's chest. It's not large enough to be . . ."
"Ah yes, experimental venom concoction applied topically to the skin after surgery to assist the healing process. It worked quite well in Edward's case, which is why we were able to get away with it."
An alarm sounded inside Garrett's office, and I followed his head as he looked toward a monitor. It was Alice, in her car, seen on the outside security camera. I gathered up the papers and replaced them in the folder.
"Hi, it's Alice. I really need to talk to Bella," she said into a speaker.
Garrett pushed a few buttons then instructed Alice to pull into the garage and that he would come to retrieve her. Feeling strangely alerted to Alice being here, I felt alarmed and protective of Edward. The monitor showed Edward was still sleeping, but I gathered up the paperwork and told Garrett I was going to head back to Edward's room.
"That might not be such a good idea," he responded. "It's best that you come see Alice and then we'll send her off. The less she sees here the better in protecting Edward from the Volturi." Grudgingly, I agreed and, with Edward fast asleep, I followed Garrett down through the same corridor Carlisle had led me through. Before opening the door, Alice was instructed to put her cell phone into the same box that I had, which Garrett pushed a button to open. When he opened the door, Alice stepped through hugging me securely.
"Bella! Bella you're not going to believe this! Carlisle had me go through the log book through the list of all the names. Edward's name was in there as a heart recipient and next to it, it said his donor was . . ."
"Let me guess. Justin James Jennings!" I said annoyed, catching his scent as I said his name, clutching the manilla envelope.
"That's right, how did you know?" she asked.
I pushed Alice aside, my entire body on alert, and stood up tall in the doorway to the large warehouse garage, seeing Alice's yellow car. I broadened my frame, sniffing the air. "Get back to him, Garrett," I commanded as I let out a low warning growl.
"Come out, Justin!" I said firmly. "I know you're here!"
Alice looked confused.
"I smell him too," said Garrett.
"Well, well, well . . . if it isn't my old friend Garrett," I heard Justin say as he clapped slowly, emerging from behind Alice's car.
"Oh fuck, I led him right to you Bella didn't I?" Alice panicked.
"That you did," Justin confirmed, taking in a good dose of the air around him. "Though, I didn't realize that following Alice to you, Bella, was going to also lead me to the one thing I've been searching for." He took a deep whiff of the air and adjusted his neck, like a human would do to crack it. "Ahhh, the victim is here."
"James," Garrett addressed him carefully. "We're all in grave danger from the Volturi. Have they contacted you?"
"No," Justin answered. "And I'm not interested in them. I'm interested in getting myself cured so I don't have to put up with these attacks of pain any longer. You never warned me about that, did you doc, when you let them slice me open and rip my organs out?"
"What attacks?" Garrett asked stepping further into the garage. "Explain more to me, and maybe I can help you." Garrett was very calm in his approach, much like Carlisle, but gently guided Alice and myself behind him.
"Ugh! Don't play dumb with me, Garrett! You know what attacks! You stole my life from me!"
"You're stronger and better," Garrett told him. "Let's not kid ourselves. You enjoy the freedom this life has given you. Whatever side effects you're experiencing, your body is strong enough to handle them."
In a mess of fury and anger, Justin lunged for Garrett, and that's when the mirrored sunglasses he was wearing flew off, and I saw the red swirled with the amber in his eyes. He had hunted. Garrett growled and hissed as he threw Justin around. The garage floor cracked when he landed on it, but Justin being freshly full of human blood was lithe and jumped up quickly, grabbing Garrett by his throat and sending him through the air until he had him up against the wall. "It's time for you to pay, Garrett!"
"Justin stop!" I yelled. "Alice, go to Edward!"
Justin did stop, letting go of Garrett, seemingly held back by agony. He yelled out in pain, clutching at his chest, falling to his knees on the garage floor. I was about to approach him, but Garrett held me back.
"Don't," Garrett commanded. "It's a trick."
"Just-Bella," Justin looked up at me with a vulnerability in his eyes. "Bella you promised to help me. All you have to do is kill this guy who has my heart and it will cure me from all this pain. Help me, Bella." He extended an arm out, with a pleading hand for me to take it.
Justin. I cried out to him in my mind, torn over the situation. I wanted to help ease it all for the Justin I knew.
"I can be everything you want me to be," he cried in agony as more pain seared through him. "Help me, Bella."
If I still had a beating heart, I knew it would have split in half, with the Justin-half shattering into a tiny million pieces. I felt a pull toward him but only to ease his suffering, and after taking two steps toward him, I looked deep into the eyes that were looking at me. Was it a trick?
I took in a long deep breath-inhaling in the scents of both Edward and Justin at the same time. Both scents were vulnerable and enticing, and they warred within me as if one would dominate-emerge triumphantly. When I exhaled, I pushed out one of the scents.
"I can't, Justin. I can't do that. And I will protect him, even if that means fighting you!"
"What did you say?" Justin jumped up, holding himself in a crouched stance, though still looking agonized.
"I keep telling you that vampire hearing is quite acute. You heard me!" I said to him. "Would you like me to find you a Shakespearean quote to explain it more precisely to you?" I snarled, overwhelmed by the sense of over-protectiveness and disdain that had come over me. I shook it off -that crazed feeling I had just experienced - and pulled myself together.
"Then bring it on," he challenged, motioning his hand with a come-here gesture.
"No," I stretched my body to stand tall and firm in resistance. "I'm not going to have to fight you."
"You're not?" Justin asked cnfused, relaxing his defensive stance and looking more like the old Justin.
"No," I said as I approached him cautiously. I cupped his chin and smiled up at him softly. "You aren't going to kill him. You can't harm him at all," I said softly.
"Can't?" he laughed. "And why's that?"
As easily as I could, I broke the news to him that I had discovered in the papers in the manilla envelope. "Because . . . he's your brother."
~ AGH ~
"My brother?" he mocked with a laugh. "Well the jokes on you just-Bella because I don't have a brother." Sensing Justin's impulse to still fight, I knew I had to calm him down. He was just about to grab my arm when I flashed away, eyeing Garrett to make sure he was okay.
"Garrett, I need you to go check on Edward while I talk," I shot Justin a look, "to Mr. Shakespeare here." I couldn't refuse the rush I felt in calling him that, as if I had the upper hand.
Garrett looked uneasily back and forth between me and Justin. "By the way, Garrett, do you think that if we provided Kate with a vial of Edward's blood -blood that's passed through the chambers of the heart that was once beating in Justin's body- she could make a concoction that could cure Justin's attacks? He does have recurring crippling attacks of pain. I've witnessed it, and I want to help make them stop."
Garrett looked over at Justin skeptically. "I don't know about cure it, but it sounds plausible as a treatment."
"Then tell Alice once you are in there, send her out of the room and draw blood on Edward and have her take it to Kate," I ordered. Garrett agreed with a slight compliment to me about what a fine doctor I will make.
Then he looked at Justin sternly. "I am sorry you got caught up in this experimentation. I will do this with the intention to help you, but if you try to harm Bella or the Cullens in any way, I will finish you."
Wow! Garrett could be a very scary monster when he wanted to be. I guess that's why he was recruited by the Volturi to begin with.
Once Garrett was gone and had closed the door securely behind him, I took Justin's hand, leading him to a work table that we sat on. This warehouse was huge but empty except for a few wooden work tables and an old x-ray machine in the back corner.
"Bella, you've met my family. Why would you say I have a brother?"
"You're adopted," I replied without hesitation before handing him the contents of the manilla folder. "Here, read this. The same time you were trying to find Edward, the guy who has your heart, he was trying to find you."
Incredulous to the idea, Justin took the papers reluctantly and read them. "We have the same father?"
I nodded a yes. "Half brothers. And he has your heart now." Realization of how complicated the situation was hit Justin as he rolled his eyes in defeat, exhaling in a loud huff.
"He's my brother? Fuck! I have a brother." He shook his head in disbelief. "I always wanted a brother. Do you think that blood concoction is really going to help me?" he asked.
"Yeah, I think it will, but so will staying away from Edward. When you're physically close to him is when the attacks come on, isn't it? You've been trying to find him. He's been traveling across the country and so have you."
"Yeah, I feel like I had always just missed him. Those attacks would stall me. But I didn't know who I was looking for. I wondered why the attacks have been so strong in Forks."
"He had been to your house, trying to find you. He's. . . " It was too tough for me to admit this out loud. "He's dying . . . and he wanted to meet you. Or maybe he thought you could help him. I don't know. He doesn't know he has your heart, or anyone's heart for that matter. Garrett and the other doctor weren't forthcoming with details. I don't understand what strange coincidence put you and him in the Chicago area at the same time but, it was the only way that he found a compatible heart. Yours. I'm just sorry how this all had to happen. Both of you got the short end of the stick."
"Hey now, being a vampire wasn't so bad a couple of days ago," he smiled.
And then there's me. Oh my God Alice was right. That night I met Edward in the hospital, in a way I hadn't realized until now, I had been reunited with a piece of Justin. My life really had come full circle in a way I just couldn't have known.
I went on to tell Justin about all of the good Edward was doing with his second chance at life. How even his niece could benefit from the Ferris wheel he was going to install. I must have given myself away in how I praised Edward. I had let my guard down enough that he saw it on my face.
He sniffed the paperwork then looked at me. "This is the guy that broke up with you isn't it? His scent is all over the paperwork and all over you. A human?"
I nodded, averting my eyes.
"And you're in love with him? A human who is my brother?" He laughed darkly. "Unfucking-believable!" I couldn't answer Justin, and he became enraged and accusing., handing the paperwork off to me. "What about the time we shared together over the past few days? What was that?"
"That was . . ." How could I explain this? "Justin, I never expected you to come back into my life, especially as a vampire! You were a teenage girl's fantasy, but I fantasized about having a sappy romantic relationship with a guy whom I thought cared about me - not just someone who was trying to use lines to get me to sleep with him. I wanted to be more than that to you."
Justin's mood simmered. "Hey what can I say? Yeah I used a line or two on you even though you were more, but old habits die hard just Bella. I didn't really know how to operate any other way."
"You...you were my Jake Ryan you know from that John Hughes movie. But there's no sequel for us. We all know that no sequels were made to those movies because they would show the heartache."
"It's too late now isn't it? What can I do?" he asked.
"It is too late. My eyes are open now. But it's not too late to have a relationship with your brother, as long as you aren't a threat to him," I answered. "Wait until my family works on a cure for you. Then meet him. Until then, lay low because the Volturi has you both marked. You can stay with my family if you want to."
"Yeah, I'm well aware of the marked business, but I have no interest in helping them. I don't even understand why you're trusting Garrett. He's the one involved in this up to his fucking fangs."
"He's not! I mean he was. But he's not anymore. He's on our side. I need to know that no matter what happens that you'll be on our side, too. We will protect you from the Volturi if we have to. And I will protect Edward at any cost. This whole fucked up situation has backfired. He's rejecting your heart. I don't know what will happen, but I do know that I can't be with you. I need to be with him. Just like I helped you when you needed me. Now he needs me."
Justin nodded in a way that meant he understood my reasoning and was almost willing to accept it. "I don't want to do anything or say anything more to hurt you, not after you helped me the way you did. Believe it or not, I do care about you. What if …. Well what will happen if he dies? Will you come running back to me then, Bella?"
"Don't ask me that, Justin, please." He reached out to gently tuck a few strands of my damp hair behind my ear.
"I thought he broke things off with you Bella."
"I thought he did too, but I was wrong. He was brought here to be protected from the Volturi without my knowledge. He's my responsibility. I have to help him. Even if that means I have to . . . ." I paused looking sadly to Justin. Apologetic even.
"Let me go?" he asked.
I nodded, my chin resting in his cradled hand where we sat in silence for a minute before Justin finally spoke.
"Wow we must have the world's worst timing. I'm going to go, but I want you to call me as soon as this cure comes through. Are you sure I can't meet him right now?" he asked.
"It's too risky." I thought of Edward's state and mentally questioned Justin's control.
"Well according to the paperwork, our shared father was from Port Angeles but died out at sea doing work as a fisherman off the Pacific Coast. I'd like to say that maybe someday I'd look for my birth mother, but seeing Alicia and my parents was difficult enough."
"Speaking of them, it's going to be harder to visit them if you don't give up the human blood." Justin recoiled. "I can see it in your eyes. You're not fooling me. Whomever you killed was someone's relative, just like Alicia is your sister. Isn't that enough to keep you from partaking?"
"Maybe," he grinned guiltily, but without apology as he strolled over and picked up his sunglasses.
"Try?"
"I'll try. For you," he agreed as Alice appeared in the doorway with a small cooler in her hand announcing that she was ready to leave and would give Justin a lift this time rather than him following her like a stalker. He agreed.
"I made sure he didn't see me, but Edward is waking up," Alice said. "Is everything okay?"
"Everything is so damn far from okay, Alice. I'm sorry I exposed you to more of this mess," I smiled over at Justin sympathetically, but realized things could be a lot worse. Alice retrieved her phone from Carlisle's lockbox, gave me a quick hug and got in her car, waiting for Justin.
Justin approached me slowly. "I'm never going to forgive myself for losing you twice." He placed his arms around me, burying his face in my neck before kissing me on the bottom of my cheek. "Goodbye, just Bella."
As he let me go and was just about to get into Alice's car, he stopped and turned to look at me.
"Is it really him that you're attracted to? Or maybe the love I had for you in my heart that's now in his body is what really has a hold of you?"
Justin's memories had carried over into Edward. Could feelings be transferred too?
"But you didn't love me," I answered him, gesturing with air quotes around the last two words.
"Didn't I?" he said simply. "He may have my heart now, just Bella, but you had it first," he said before getting into the car.
Stunned by his words, I pressed the button at the wall and opened the secret door, watching Alice and my past speed away before closing the door and returning to my future.
~ AGH ~
"Good, you're still here," Edward said sitting up and awake. "I was afraid I had bored you so much that you'd left."
The artificial lighting in the room was too bright. I had placed the manilla envelope on the table and fell into Edward's arms, selfishly needing comfort from him after feeling the sting of Justin's last statement. The blanket between us hopefully kept him from feeling too much of my coldness. I wanted to tell him about Justin. His brother. I wanted to tell him what happened when I thought he had left me, but I didn't want that to screw up things between us. I didn't want to lose my past and my future all in one day. His pulse and heart beat were steady. Maybe more of my past was here than I had realized. Was Justin right? Was my attraction to Edward real, or had it always been masked by my attraction to Justin?
Edward softly spoke about the places he wanted to take me to in Chicago, and the people he wanted to introduce me to. He talked about reporting to his boss and getting a team to begin construction on the Ferris wheel. I just listened and sighed along.
If Kate could come up with a concoction from Edward's blood to help Justin that was one problem solved. But how were we medically going to solve Edward's dilemma? He couldn't go through life literally attached to me.
"How long can you stay?" Edward asked.
"For as long as you're in here," I answered.
"No, I mean in Chicago."
"Oh, Chicago. For as long as it takes," I said carefully, not knowing the outcome but knowing I was lying to him about where we were.
"Bella . . . what's going to happen when I die?"
"Well some people say you go to heaven," I said quietly.
"Be serious." He groaned. "I've been up and down with this since I met you, but I can't keep denying it. I'd just really like to see my Ferris wheel built and running before I die."
I couldn't bear to hear him talking about dying.
~AGH~
~AGH~
~AGH~
A/N: So Edward had come to the area in search of his long-long biological half-brother, Justin. Good thing Edward found Bella first.
Refer to chapter 16 (New Girl)