"Where am I?" She asked. "You're in the hospital sweetie. You got shot and hit by a car on your motorcycle. Do you remember?" Carmilla shook her head.

But then the most heartbreaking thing fell from her beautiful lips.

"Who are you?"

An hour or so after Carmilla had woken up, Laura sat listening to what the doctor had to say about Carmilla's current issue.

"Well Miss Hollis, she certainly had a lot of trauma happen to her in her accident; Head trauma, body trauma, heart trauma. We lost her twice on the operating table, if you recall." Laura nodded, and from the bed Carmilla made a gasping noise. "I died?" She asked in disbelief. The doctor turned his attention to her and gave her a curt nod, before returning his gaze to Laura, who nodded at him to continue. "She is, for lack of a better word, healthy. The only concern that I have is her lungs and now obviously her memory." Laura looked over to Carmilla who was inspecting some scar wounds she had on her arm from being scraped up by the pavement.

"Will she regain her memory?" Suddenly Laura wasn't 18 years old. She was an adult who was worrying for their partner and having to take on a very adult view of things. The doctor could only shrug with a disheartened smile. "It's unlikely. Most patients who have memory loss usually at least remember some aspects of themselves, but it seems Miss Karnstein here is a clean slate." Laura looked over at Carmilla, who had taken an interest in the conversation and had her brows furrowed. "Is there anything you can do?" Laura asked hopefully. She knew that the answer would likely be negative but she had to ask anyways. She wouldn't be Laura Hollis if she didn't have hope.

The doctor sighed and shook his head. "Honestly, the best thing for her would be to stay here for a few more weeks. She'll be monitored and well taken care of, of course. Maybe we can jog her memory a bit. I'd like to keep her under close observation to see if her mental state changes any." Laura nodded, it seemed to be one of the only movements she could make. "The only problem with that is, I need a family member to sign a form saying that we can keep her here for observation." Laura's brow furrowed, matching Carmilla's. "She's 18 sir." She said in a sort of 'duh' way. "But she has no idea who she is and is not of sound mind to make that decision for herself."

"Well I'm her girlfriend, can't I sign it?" Carmilla made a shocked noise, similar to her gasp from earlier. "You're my girlfriend? I'm gay?" Her eyes were wide and she was staring at Laura. Laura smiled a bit, because despite Carmilla not knowing basically anything, she still managed to be cute. "Very." Was all Laura said in response. She turned again to the doctor who had a small smile on his face. "I wish I could let you sign it Miss Hollis but I just simply can't let anyone other than a family member sign."

"Well good luck with that! Her mother is never around, her father is in prison, and her brother isn't of age." The doctor turned sorrowful eyes to the girl who was laying in bed, contemplating her newfound gay-ness. He hadn't recalled anyone but Miss Hollis and her father visiting the poor girl. He could tell Miss Hollis loved Miss Karnstein very much, in fact everyone could. The nurses often spoke about how they wish they could one day find someone that looks at them, like the way Miss Hollis looks at Miss Karnstein.

"Well then I suppose she'll have to sign her own discharge papers and be on her way. I'd like to keep her here for another day just to be sure that she's able to be on her own. In the meantime I will try contacting her mother." Laura helplessly nodded and watched as the doctor gave Carmilla a small wave and left the room, closing the door behind him. She turned her eyes towards Carmilla who was staring at her. She walked over to the chair that she had become very familiar with and settled down into it. "Hey." She spoke, trying to keep all the shakiness out of her voice. "Hey." Carmilla responded, not sure what else to say to this stranger who seemed to be the only person that was there for her. There was an awkward silence until Carmilla pipped up, "What's my favorite color?" She asked Laura. The smaller girl looked up from where she had been staring at her hands and blew out a shaky breath as a smile crept onto her face.

"Red. If anyone else were to answer that they'd say black, but I know you love the color red." Carmilla accepted this answer with a nod. "I do like red." She said with a smile. "Your name is Laura right?" Laura's heart squeezed a bit, but she responded with a broken, "Yes."

"Well Laura, I have decided that I'm not going to be sad about this. I'm gonna be as happy as possible. You'll be around to help me, won't you?" Carmilla looked at Laura with the most earnest and hopeful eyes. Unbeknownst to Laura, they looked the same as when Carmilla had professed her love for the littler girl. "Yes of course I will Carm." Laura responded. The dark haired girl's nose bunched up in an adorable way. "Carm? Is that your nickname for me?" Laura nodded and smiled, "Ever since we were kids."

"Oh wow! We've known each other that long?" Carmilla asked excitedly. Laura decided in that moment that she was going to take a page from Carmilla 2.0's book and try to remain positive about this. Carmilla wasn't frowning, she wasn't pouting or feeling sorry for herself. She was instead trying to make an effort to re-get to know Laura. Laura couldn't help but think to herself that in some twisted way, this might be what they needed. Both Carmilla and Laura had lost themselves somewhere in the past few years, and they were now given a chance to find themselves again. The situation was beyond messed up and truth be told Laura didn't know if this was the best way to go about finding herself again, but Carmilla was alive despite all the odds being against her.

That was enough for Laura to push forward.

*Two years later*

Carmilla carefully sat herself down on the couch that had just a few hours before been placed in her new shared apartment. She was mindful of her bad leg and the coffee table's legs that were only a foot away from the couch itself. "Laura?" She called. Laura popped her head from around the corner of the wall that separated the kitchen and the living room. "Yes?"

"The TV has a crack in it." Laura came flying into the living room and stood directly in front of Carmilla's field of vision of the TV, looking for the crack. There was a large crack going from the top left corner of the TV to the middle, where a spider web crack formed. "You have got to be kidding me." She said lowly. "Those mover guys guaranteed perfection! This isn't perfect!" Carmilla laughed, "Laura, honey you need to calm down. Did you get a warranty on the TV?"

Laura glared at Carmilla over her shoulder, "No I did not. Because someone said I wouldn't need it." Carmilla sheepishly slumped back into the couch, "Oh yeah.. I did say that, didn't I?" Laura turned around and fixed her with a playful glare. "Yes you did. And now guess who's going to be buying a brand new TV all on her own?" Carmilla pointed to herself with a sad look, "This sad cat."

"Yes that sad, but cute, cat." Laura said with a smile. She walked forward and took Carmilla's head in between her hands and brought her forehead to her lips, leaving a soft kiss to the long but thin scar that was above her left eyebrow. Carmilla blushed a little and smiled up at Laura.

The last two years had been up and down, but the girls had formed a strong relationship. Laura kept saying it was because they were meant to be together, but for Carmilla it ran deeper then that. She would lie awake at night holding Laura in her arms and think to herself, 'She's my everything.' No one else came to her aid when she got out of the hospital.

Her mother finally came home a week after she was discharged and merely told her to be more careful next time, to which Carmilla had no idea how to respond. Because in that moment the woman was a total stranger and Carmilla wasn't even sure what she had done to be more careful of in the first place. Her brother instead of helping her, belittled her and poked fun at her memory loss. Asking her things like "What's your favorite football team? Oh yeah, you wouldn't know." (She liked the Philadelphia Eagles thank you very much!)

Laura had truly been an angel. Her angel, as she liked to put it. It was almost inevitable that she fall in love with Laura. Some days she would get feelings of familiarity but they were fleeting and useless. They never pointed her in the right direction to any recollection of her old self, but that didn't bother her too much. She had pretty much accepted the fact that she would never remember anything from her old life. Laura called her 'Carm 2.0, the new and improved model.'

Carmilla liked that nickname for one simple reason: She was a better person now. She knew this for fact, because when she had gone home she was given access to her laptop and phone. The things that her old self had said and done was almost horrifying. About a year after the accident she showed Laura a few screen shots that she had taken, of what her former self had wrote in Facebook messages and text messages. Laura had smiled at her and placed a hand on her cheek and said, "That's not who you are anymore Carm. I have to believe that was never you. I think you lost your way, but you're finding it now. This is you."

She had Laura's father to thank as well. The man at first seemed indifferent towards her but as time went on he began to treat her with incredible kindness. The entire reason that they were able to afford the apartment they just moved into was because he was footing the bill. Neither Carmilla nor Laura knew exactly why the older man volunteered to pay for their living expenses, but neither of them complained either.

The dark haired girl snapped herself out of her thoughts when Laura sat beside her with a bit of a worried look. "Carm? You alright?" Carmilla nodded, "Yeah sorry, I spaced out. A lot of thoughts happen up here." She gestured to her head with a bright smile. Laura laughed and leaned her head on Carmilla's shoulder. The silence that followed was peaceful. They both looked around the living room of their new shared apartment in Paris and sighed contently.

Paris had been Laura's idea. She said that it was one of Carmilla's dreams to live there, and Carmilla could not deny that she felt a dream had come true. Weather the dream was living with Laura or living in Paris she wasn't sure, but one (maybe both) had been fulfilled. They sat like that for about half an hour before Laura got up and carefully moved around Carmilla's legs, being mindful of her bad one. "I'm going to go finish unpacking the kitchen stuff, then what do you say you and I go to that restaurant down the street?"

"Deal but only if I can help you unpack the kitchen." Carmilla said with a knowing look. Laura was always hesitant to let her do anything strenuous like heavy lifting, but Carmilla was more than capable to help. Something that never escaped Laura's mind was the image of Carmilla lying broken and bleeding on the pavement just beneath her fingertips almost two and a half years ago. Now a constant reminder of that was the limp that Carmilla had in her leg that had been crushed and broken under the weight of the car that ran her over. Not to mention the scars that littered her body.

"Just as long as you promise to be careful, and if you ask me for help when you need it." Carmilla rolled her eyes, "Laura I'm not a child. I can help you out just fine." She stood from the couch and made her way into the kitchen, very much aware that Laura was watching her limp by. The damned limp was the only thing that Carmilla had to complain about, well that and the amount of doctor appointments she needed to go to monthly. Luckily her doctor back home found her a great doctor in Paris who was going to see her in a few days. Apparently getting your heart nicked by a bullet is worrisome.

Both Laura and Carmilla set to work in the kitchen and within an hour they were done, and heading to the restaurant arm in arm. While Laura was staring at her phone, putting in walking directions to the restaurant, Carmilla was admiring the city. From where their apartment was you could see the Eiffel Tower in almost its entirety. The road they lived on was filled with shops, bakeries, and apartments. She looked over and smiled down at Laura who had her concentration face on, as she stared at her phone. Her tongue peeked out from her barely parted lips and her eyebrows were scrunched together and touching. "I don't understand, Google said we past it already!" Carmilla only chuckled and stopped, causing Laura to stop abruptly and look up at her in confusion. Though when the smaller girl looked at where Carmilla stopped them she smiled. "Oh! You found it." Carmilla nodded, "Yes I did, and what do you know I found it without the use of a GPS."

Laura laughed and shoved Carmilla lightly in the direction of the restaurant, careful to not push too hard because of the girl's limp. "Okay wiseguy, let's just go in." A pause, "I wonder if we can get patio seating." She said more to herself then Carmilla. Carmilla merely shook her head with a smile, then walked up to the hostess and before she knew it words were flying from her mouth, "Une table pour deux s'il vous plait[1]."

Shock. That was the best word to describe the feeling both Carmilla and Laura had in that moment. The hostess simply nodded and walked them back outside and to the farthest table on the end of the patio strip. The only other occupied table was three tables away. They sat down, and stared at each other. "Carm..?" She asked in a shaky tone. "I.. I don't know where that came from. It's like my mouth just knew what to say and said it without my knowledge. I didn't even know I could speak French. Can I speak French?" She asked Laura the last part in a whisper.

Laura didn't know how to describe the feeling she was having right now. Could it be that after all this time the old Carmilla was still somewhere trapped in Carmilla 2.0? "You took French for five years in school." Was all Laura could supply. Carmilla scrunched up her nose and gave Laura a miffed look. "That's it? I just spew out an expert sentence in French and all you have to say is I took it for five years?"

"Carmilla, after your accident there has been no trace of the old you, other than your general like for the same things. Your favorite color, your wardrobe, your sarcasm. Then suddenly you're speaking French fluently. I'm just as surprised as you." Carmilla's face softened.

Something she has to remind herself every so often is that Laura has known her, her whole life. Carmilla can only remember the last two years. "Sorry Laur, I guess it's just odd." Laura reached across the table and took the hand Carmilla had resting on the table in her own, just as a waiter walked up to take their order. "Bonjour, que voudriez-vous boire[2]?"

"Two glasses of water please." Laura pipped up. "Ah, okay. I'll go get that for you ladies." He said in English but with a thick French accent.

The remainder of their time at the restaurant was fun. Laura always caught herself thinking just how much fun Carmilla was. She made Laura laugh more than any other person, which the old Carmilla did as well. Something that never changed about Carmilla was just how much Laura was enamored with her mind. Though the mind that Carmilla possessed now was a lot less crude, she still shared most of the same qualities as pre-accident Carmilla. They were both wildly intelligent, and could articulate themselves much better than the average 21 year old.

There was a corner deep in Laura's mind that was ashamed (almost) to think of Carmilla as two separate people, but it was hard not to. Standing side-by-side she was sure that the Carmilla she knew her whole life and the Carmilla she knew now, would hate each other. Old Carmilla would call new Carmilla an "uptight bitch". While new Carmilla would see nothing but an immature child with no self respect or respect for anyone else for that matter. They were completely different in so many ways, but also shared common interests, as Laura had pointed out earlier.

Even the way that they made love was different. Granted Laura never slept with Carmilla before the accident, but the way that Carmilla touches her now is different. Before the accident Carmilla would touch Laura with possessive, dirty fingers. She would try to coax Laura into doing more than she wanted, and would be rough with her when they would be in heated make-out sessions.

Carmilla now caressed her as if she was the most precious thing in the world. Her finger tips would graze over her skin, setting it on fire and soothing it at the same time. There was still a hint of possessiveness, but not in the same way it was before. Now it felt less like ownership and more like "I can't lose you." Which is something Carmilla has whispered to Laura when she thought that she was asleep.

Soon after they paid their bill, having thoroughly enjoyed their dinner, they were walking hand in hand back to their apartment in silence. Carmilla was again admiring the city, but Laura was deep in her own thoughts, mostly about how much she loved the girl she was currently holding onto. "Hey Carm?" She asked. "Yes?"

"I want you to know that I love you." She stopped and planted herself in front of Carmilla, looking up at her. She reached up and placed her hands on the sides of Carmilla's neck. "I love all of you. I love the good heart that you have, and I love your mind." Carmilla scoffed. "You mean the mind that is permanently damaged and incapable of remembering anything past two years ago?" Apparently Laura's earlier comment had made its mark.

"Just because you can't remember it doesn't mean it's not there somewhere. You proved that theory many times before, but tonight you solidified it. You spoke fluent French! Which means that somewhere in there is your knowledge from before. Carmilla I love you." She said, putting emphasis on the last word and poking a finger into the girl's chest, then returned her hand to Carmilla's neck. "I don't care if you never regain your memories or if you suddenly wake up and remember how when we were 13 you shoved a worm down my bra." Carmilla chuckled at that, not remembering this incident but finding it incredibly funny nonetheless. "You will always be you. You've never been afraid to be exactly who you are. You are vastly different than who you were back then, but to me it doesn't matter. I loved you back then, thorns and all, and I love you now glitter and all." Carmilla leaned down and pressed her lips against Laura's in a soft kiss. When she pulled away she smirked down at Laura. "What?" She asked. "So glitter huh?" Laura huffed and grabbed her hand so that they could continue their walk home.

"Shut up."

[1] "Table for two please."

[2] "Hello, what would you like to drink?"

Hey guys! So I want to apologize if my French is not correct! I have never taken any classes in this language, so I used Google Translate. I tried my best to make sure it was correct though. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, leave me a comment with your thoughts!