The Infamous Marauders

Chapter Eighteen

Author's Note: Please review and let me know what you think of the story so far :)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters featured in this story they belong to J. K. Rowling.

December 1976

The lull in house rivalries lead to a slightly more relaxed atmosphere within the school, the mixture of students at house tables did not continue, however people could be seen speaking to fellow students of different houses in the corridors and the Slytherins were not shunned as frequently. Seeing supposedly dark wizards laughing and playing in the snow helped to somewhat change people's viewpoints, the friendships were certainly more prominent between the younger students than the older ones though. To say that Hogwarts had changed overnight would be untrue, years of disagreements, suspicion and in some cases hatred would not be forgotten because of a single day of students being civil with one another. The students gradually became more jovial as Christmas decorations began to appear around the castle, despite the increase in homework given out for the holidays, and the silence in the halls was steadily replaced with excited chatter.

Remus however noticed that Sirius' mood had begun to darken the closer it came to the Christmas holidays, he had rarely seen Sirius as he was often with Lily researching their Ancient Rune project and his friend was frequently practicing flying with James. When he did see him in classes and at meal times he had begun to talk less and had a brooding look on his face, he always attempted to perk up when people spoke to him directly, but Remus could tell it was all a front. He had attempted to speak to him about it, but he always said he was busy and rushed off, Remus was beginning to think Sirius was avoiding him. He hoped he had not scared Sirius the other day when his wolf rose up during the final standoff in the snowball fight. He decided he needed to speak with Sirius, even if he was avoiding him his friend was obviously bottling something up, so he wanted to help.

It wasn't till later that day that Remus saw Sirius he had hoped to catch him at Dinner but only James arrived telling Remus and Peter that he was grabbing some food for him and Sirius to take down the pitch, so they could go fly undisturbed.

When the two returned to the dormitory from flying Remus finally had his opportunity "Hey Pads you mind coming to the kitchens with me, I really fancy going down for some hot chocolate?" Remus hoped that Sirius would say yes, he had decided to ask in front of the others thinking Sirius would be more likely to accept.

Sirius hesitated for a moment before nodding "Sure let me just have a shower then we can go down"

Sirius stepped underneath the hot shower relishing in the sensation of the water cascading over his sore muscles, he had been practicing non-stop with James recently in a bid to keep his mind distracted. He had been feeling increasingly anxious about not returning home for Christmas his mother and father were strict with their rules that Sirius must return over the holidays to attend family gatherings. He never wanted to return to that house but was nervous about the consequences he knew his parents would not hesitate in disowning him, they already openly despised him for being a Gryffindor and associating with blood traitors such as James, he knew to defy them and not return home would only anger his mother. He was also becoming increasingly unsure about his feelings towards Remus, he loved Remus he was his best friend, but things had seemed different recently and Sirius didn't know how to act with these unfamiliar feelings. Sirius finished in the shower and got dressed ready to go visit the kitchens.

"I'm ready, who has the map?" Sirius asked as he flicked his wand to dry his long black locks, Remus looked over the top of his book not believing his hair could look so perfect after being subjected to a simple drying charm.

James hopped off the bed and fetched the map from his trunk "Here you go"

"Thanks Prongs, let's go"

Remus put the book he was reading on his bed side table and jumped up "See you soon guys" Remus called to Peter and James.

"Bring me back a snack" Peter shouted as they exited the dorm.

The house elves were excited to see the young boys and happily greeted them "How can we serve you misters?"

"Can you please get us two hot chocolates and a slice a chocolate cake?" Sirius asked politely.

The elves quickly ran off to fulfil the request as Sirius and Remus took a seat.

"What's going on with you Pads you seem down?" Remus decided it would be best to get straight to the point.

"Nothing I'm fine I've just been tired with all the extra training"

Remus quirked an eyebrow at his response "I think after six years I would know you better than that, I just want you to know you can talk to me"

Sirius never liked to shut Remus out, it wouldn't be right to lie when Remus was only trying to be supportive. "It's just Christmas is coming up and this will be the first year I don't go home, I stand by my decision to never go back there I just feel so confused, I want to feel happy with my decision I hate their views, I do have good memories though from when I was younger" He sighed.

Remus had expected it was to do with this "Why don't you ask James if you could go to his over Christmas? I'm sure the Potters would love to have you there and once his parents know you don't want to go back maybe they could find a way to help you"

"I don't think that would be for the best, I don't want to ruin their Christmas, I might tell everyone that I'm going to visit other family"

"I'm pretty sure your as good as James' brother in their eyes I doubt you would ever ruin their Christmas, are you really considering visiting someone else in your family?"

"Merlin no I don't want anything to do with them the only person I might go see is Andromeda, but she will probably want to spend it with Ted and his family"

"You will need to speak to someone before the summer though Pads"

"I know, I just need some time to figure out what I'm going to do, if I turn my back on them fully I will be disowned, which will suit them then Regulus can be their perfect pureblood heir, I will have no home, no money" Sirius paused trying to reign in his emotions "This will be the first Christmas I spend alone, when I was younger at least I still had Regulus before they turned him into a mini wannabe death eater" Sirius spat.

"Well I'm staying at the school" Remus admitted in the hopes it would cheer Sirius up.

"You are? Then we can spend Christmas together! Wait how come you aren't going home this year?"

"I haven't gone back home for the Christmas holidays since our second year" Remus confessed.

"What? You have never told me that"

"The last few years you have taken the train I have been in the infirmary after my transformation or my transformation was due, so I just told you that I was travelling home later, I didn't want you to feel bad for me and stay at the castle"

"Why don't you go home for Christmas anymore?" Sirius asked in confusion.

"My dad doesn't enjoy Christmas without my mother anymore it seemed easier if I stayed at school, so he could pretend it wasn't Christmas at all"

Sirius felt guilty how had he never noticed that one of his best friends spent Christmas alone every year "Well this year we will have a great Christmas together"

The house elves waited patiently for a lapse in the boys' conversation to present them with their drinks and slice of cake grinning widely at the boys' gratitude. Remus eyes lit up instantly at the chocolatey treats. Sirius chuckled at his friend without fail chocolate would put a smile on Remus' face. He was looking forward to Christmas again and he was going to make sure Remus had an enjoyable Christmas too. He had been avoiding him since the snowball fight trying to ignore his feelings, but spending time with him tonight didn't feel weird, maybe if he hadn't avoided him he would have realised things were the same sooner.

"Listen Pads there is something else I wanted to talk to you about"

Sirius knew what was coming, Remus was surely going to mention how he had been avoiding him "Go ahead"

"Well when I pinned you the other day I know I probably came across really intense I just wanted to apologise properly, the wolf seemed to take over, it was still me, but I couldn't stop myself I hope I didn't scare you, you would tell me if I did wouldn't you, I have been trying to research what has been going on with the wolf these past few months but I can't find anything"

"Remus stop rambling its completely fine don't worry about it" Sirius reassured his friend.

"You sure? I don't want you to be afraid of me" Remus whispered.

"The Marauders always stick together Remus, I know your furry problem isn't something to be scared about I've just had a lot on my mind. I'm sorry if you thought I was avoiding you"

Remus looked relieved and it made Sirius' stomach clench he felt terrible for making Remus feel bad, he knew how self-conscious Remus was about his affliction.

"Here is to the best Christmas ever!" Sirius declared raising his cocoa, the boys clinked cups and continued talking, moving onto lighter topics.