Hey guys, sorry for the long wait, I had more of this written a while ago but just got hard to find time for while there.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed, I love you all and I hope you like this chapter! I have some big plans for what is coming up, so I hope this is keeping you entertained because it's gonna get interesting soon enough!

Let me know what you think! :D

Chapter 5 – Titanium

Gabby laughed as she leaned over the back of the ambo, Shay having made a comment about how she needed to change teams. They had been doing inventory for the last twenty minutes, enjoying the quiet time that came very rarely in the firehouse; they could talk and get things done without being disturbed. "I'm sorry hun, but I like this team." It wasn't the first time Shay had made such a comment, falling into easy conversation as they always did.

As she leaned over to reach for something, Gabby felt a hand on her back, resting there gently but she jumped, spinning around, her heart racing. "Jesus Christ Matt. Don't do that!" He had scared her, not expecting anyone to touch her. "You really know how to give me a heart attack." Gabby laughed, watching as he dropped his head, a small smile coming to his lips.

"Sorry about that, just didn't want to make a scene…" They had kept their interactions close to the chest, not wanting to bring attention to themselves as they now shared something special. If they brought attention to themselves, then they would have to explain why things had changed between them, which would no doubt lead onto questions about Hallie.

Shay smiled, Gabby had told her a little about what was going on between them, that they had had a really good talk about a few things and it had changed what they thought about each other, but she still didn't know about what had actually happened, what Matt had told Gabby and what had happened to Gabby. "Do you have a minute?" He looked more up at Shay, hoping she would get the idea that he wanted to talk to Gabby alone for a few minutes, hoping she would leave them at the ambo.

"On that note; I'm hungry…" Shay announced, moving from the back of the ambo, a quick glance shot in Gabby's direction, who smiled back at her, thankful for her understanding. In truth, Shay didn't really understand what had changed, she was constantly asking Gabby about it, wanting to know more because it was obvious there was more to the story than she was getting but part of her was just happy that they were getting along. Both seeing the real person.

Leaning against the back of the ambo, Gabby watched as Matt took a seat next to her, he looked a little shy, unsure of himself. "What's up?" Bumping her shoulder against his, she hoped to ease whatever worry he had growing inside of him.

The last time she had seen him was at Molly's a few nights before. Where she had told him that he needed to stop hurting himself, where she had called him 'Matt' and asked him to stop. That night he had up and left, leaving the half empty beer bottle in front of her and Gabby watching him worriedly as he left Molly's. The same night he had finished off almost an entire bottle of Whiskey before passing out on the couch.

She hadn't seen or heard from him since. That morning when they had come into the fire house, she had seen him, watched as he looked her way before looking anywhere but at her, too embarrassed to look her in the eye after that night. Clearing his throat, Matt sighed, "I just wanted to thank you for not saying anything to anyone about Hallie. I know it could have been really easy for you to tell everyone…" He wouldn't look at her, scared of what her reaction would be.

Gabby blinked, scrunching her face, why would he think she would do something like that? "I'm not a bitch you know…" She bit back, defensiveness coming over her, she didn't like what he was insinuating. Gabby stood quickly, she knew he was thanking her but he really needed to make sure he picked his words correctly because he'd basically just called her a bitch.

Turning to leave his side, Matt reach out suddenly, grabbing onto her arm to stop her. "Wait, Gabby…" He didn't mean to upset her; he didn't want her to think that that was what he thought of her. "I'm sorry, that's not what I meant…" He watched as she turned to face him, searching his face before slowly taking a seat by his side once more.

Sighing deeply, he rubbed his face; "I just meant that I haven't really given you a reason to be nice to me recently. I just wanted to say thank you for not saying anything. I just don't want them all to know…" He shrugged, looking away from her again.

Gabby turned her head to the side, noticing Kelly and Squad laughing at their table before looking back at Matt. "You know…they aren't going to think less of you. She cheated on you."

But Matt shrugged again. "They know all I've ever wanted is to have a family so finding out that Hallie is having a baby with someone else…I just don't want to deal with that." Gabby understood, she didn't want people to know her ex was abusive, not because it was her fault but just that she knew she would be looked at like a victim.

"You don't want them to see you as a victim. You don't want to be looked at that way…" She completely understood, watching him nod his head, she got him. Matt looked up at her, a little shocked. "Remember, I've been through it too, I know what it feels like. Not wanting people to think you are the victim, not wanting them to look at you differently or feel sorry for you." She really did know how he was feeling.

Sighing, he rubbed his head, "I really just don't want to deal with it, the questions and the looks and the comments. I know they will mean well but I would prefer if it just stay between you and me." Gabby nodded, resting her hand against his, silence taking over them.

After a while she spoke, her voice quiet, "You know…I am worried about you Matt. You need to stop drinking as much as you do-"

But Matt cut her off, standing suddenly, "Hey it's alright. I've got it under control." Before he turned away from her, making his way back into the firehouse. Matt didn't want to talk about his drinking, he knew she was right but he didn't want to talk about it. He wanted to believe he had it under control, that he had a handle on it, but that lie slowly tasted sour in his mouth, even to him.

Gabby watched him go, even more unsure about how now, he honestly couldn't believe that he had it under control, there was no part of this that he had under control, but she would be there for him, help him if he asked, she just hoped he would ask.

"Anyone seen Lieutenant Casey?"

Boden's question struck the group, none of them had seen him that morning, and he wasn't there for role call, which that in itself was strange. Matt was never late, not at least without Boden already knowing he would be running late. Gabby glanced back at Kelly who was watching, then glancing at Shay, they were really worried knowing that Matt wasn't there.

Once role call was done, Gabby, Shay and Kelly found themselves in his office, "So you don't have any idea where he is?" Gabby asked, looking between Kelly and Shay. She hadn't heard from Matt in a few days, that wasn't unusual, when he was busy with construction jobs he wouldn't always message her but they had both become accustomed to their constant communication.

"Nah, I haven't heard from him, I figured you might have an idea." Shay shook her head, she couldn't believe they didn't know where he was.

Kelly crossed his arms over his chest and looked at Gabby, "Come on Gabs, you gotta tell us what is going on with him!" Kelly was frustrated, he hated not knowing where Matt was or what was going on with him, he knew something was happening but he didn't know what. And worse, Gabby wouldn't tell him.

"Look, I can't ok!" She bit back, getting upset that this was coming back to her. Sighing she rubbed her head, "Just…let's go for a drive, we will check out his place and see if he is there…" She looked over to Shay who nodded.

As they pulled up in front of Matt's home, Gabby turned to Shay before she could take her seat belt off, "Wait. I need to do this alone…please…" She looked at Shay with pleading eyes, if Matt was there but something was wrong, he wouldn't forgive her for bringing Shay there. Slowly, Shay sat back against the seat, nodding slowly, before Gabby moved to get out, making her way up the steps to his front door.

Knocking a few times, Gabby waited to see if she would get an answer, calling out his name as well but that didn't seem to work. So with a flat hand, Gabby slowly pushed against the old, wooden front door, watching it swing open under the pressure. She was a little shocked and scared that it was actually open, not locked like she had hoped, This would be the first time she would be visiting Matt's apartment and she had no idea what to expect when she walked in but what she did find, she wasn't expecting at all.

Lying on his side, on the couch, surrounded by empty beer and whiskey bottles was Matt. Curled up with a blanket up to his neck and a pillow under his head, he looked peaceful and calm, a look she hadn't really seen on his face before. No doubt having drank himself to sleep last night.

She sighed, kneeling by his side, Gabby let her hand brush over his cheek, slipping through his hair, hoping it would be enough to wake him not but startle him. Slowly he stirred under her touch, turning into her touch. Blinking heavily, he looked up at her; trying to work out who she was and what she was doing in his home. "Gabby?" His voice was thick and heavy with sleepy.

She nodded, brushing her hand against his face again, her brows furrowing in worry at how much he had actually had to drink last night, her eyes darting from the bottles on the coffee table, back to his face. "We were worried when you didn't turn up for role call this morning…" She watched as it was his turn for his brow to furrow, confusion setting in.

He sat up quickly, the blanket falling away to show him in just his track pants; he looked so lost and confused as he looked around, unsure of what was happening. Matt rubbed his head, Rubbing his head sitting up too quickly, he looked over at the time, groaning, "Shit." He couldn't believe he had slept in, he couldn't believe he had gotten so drunk the night before that he hadn't even made it up to his own bed but instead falling asleep on the couch.

"Wow…Matt, slow down. Come on now…" Gabby placed her hands against his chest, trying to slow him down; she didn't want him getting up too quickly. "I told Chief that we were going to come and check on you…" At her words, Matt looked around, a little concerned that someone else was in the house seeing him like this. "Don't worry, Shay is outside in the ambo." She made him look at her, relaxing him a little. Slowly they rose, her hands still against his chest to steady him. "How about you head upstairs, get showered up and then we can head to the firehouse."

Matt swallowed, how was she so good to him after everything that he had done to her? Resting his hands on her shoulders, Matt nodded, wanting to thank her but not sure as to how, so instead he pulled her into a tight hug, burying his face into the crook of her neck, feeling her hug him back. Pulling away after a moment, Matt made his way to the stairs; slowly disappearing from sight as he took a step at a time up to the second level of the house.

Gabby looked around, rubbing her forehead as she sighed; she really was getting scared now. Matt couldn't keep doing this to himself; he couldn't keep pushing down all of his emotions, letting them bubble over before exploding. Leaning down she reached for the closest of the bottles, deciding to clean up a little while he was getting cleaned up. She thought about how she could help him, how Kelly had helped her when she had needed it most.

Twenty minutes had passed by the time Matt made his way back down stairs, freshly showered, shaved and dressed. Taking a few steps into the living room, he looked around. The bottles and cans were gone, the couch was straightened up and the pillow and blanket were folded neatly into the corner of the couch. He sighed; she had cleaned up for him..

How had he let things get this bad? She shouldn't be worried about him, she shouldn't have had to come and find him, passed out on the couch from the night before. She really shouldn't have come in to clean up after him.

"Hey."

Turning at her voice, Matt found Gabby coming from the kitchen, she was standing there with a take away mug in her hands, holding it out for him. "Hey." He replied, reaching for the drink, letting it touch his lips and slip down his throat, warming him instantly. "Thanks for this…you really didn't have to." He was talking about the coffee, but motioning towards the living room, he was very embarrassed to say the least.

But she shrugged and smiled, "It's nothing really," she paused for a moment, "You really have me worried though, Matt." His replied was a nod. He knew she was worried; his drinking had increased since Hallie had shown up, over three weeks before. Seeing her that day, actually seeing her pregnant, it was like a shot to the heart. Clearing her throat, Gabby motioned towards the door, "Come on, let's get to the firehouse." And with that they made their way to the door, Gabby waiting for Matt to lock up behind her, ever so thankful that he was ok.

He knew this was coming, the minute he realised that he was well and truly late for shift, he knew that Boden was going to be angry and he was right too. Matt had never been late to a shift like this a day in his life, at least not without a legitimate reason and he was the lieutenant, he had to lead his men. "When I come in for role call, I expect to see both of my lieutenants ready to go for shift. Do I make myself clear?" Boden wasn't angry, he was fuming. Matt felt like a kid in trouble with their favourite teacher as he paced back and forth behind his bed, Matt standing there with his hands behind his back and his head hung low.

"Yes, absolutely Chief." His voice was low, he knew he was in trouble. Boden stopped pacing and looked over to his young lieutenant, taking him all in.

Moving from behind his desk, Boden came to stand in front of Matt, "Casey; what is going on with you?" This was not like Matt; Boden knew that, he had known him long enough to know when something was going on.

He could lie to Boden and say that he had slept in; he could lie and say that nothing was wrong; but in the back of his mind he could hear Gabby's voice, encouraging him to tell the Chief what was going on.

Gabby.

She had been his rock over the last almost four weeks and he was finding himself needing her once again. "Ah Chief…can I have a minute please?" Boden eyed him a little confused but nodded, watching as Matt made his way out of his office, only to return moments later with a confused looking Gabby by his side. Matt closed the door behind them, taking a seat on the couch, Gabby sitting by his side, realising what was going on.

"Ah…as you know, Hallie and I…we broke up about 6 months ago now." He rubbed his forehead, "Anyway, she is pregnant." It was like ripping off a Band-Aid, Matt just had to get it out, telling the chief without waiting or else he would chicken out.

Gabby reached for his hand, squeezing it tightly in comfort, something that wasn't lost on Boden, he knew they had been at odds with each other, so this was a nice surprise to see them getting along, caring about each other.

"She had been cheating on me, for a while it seemed. The baby…it isn't…" But Matt looked away, he couldn't finish his sentence, it hurt to much to say those words again, Gabby was the first and only person he had said those words to.

Boden nodded, dropping his head, he knew how much Matt had loved Hallie and he knew how much a family of his own meant to him, to know that this was happening to Matt, was heart breaking. "I'm sorry Chief. I really am. Being late, it won't happen again. I promise." Matt looked up towards Gabby, this time, showing her a really small smile, something he hoped she saw.

"I'm so sorry, Casey." Boden stood in front of him, waiting for Matt to stand as well, something he did instantly. Reaching out, Boden shook Matt's hand, resting the other one on his shoulder.

Moments later, Matt moved from the office with his head hung low, he was tired, he had a headache that was for sure but he couldn't think about that now, he had work to catch up. Boden watched Matt leave before looking down at Gabby who was watching Matt, "How is he really?" Boden wasn't stupid, Matt was a very private person, he wouldn't give too much away if he didn't haven to.

Gabby sighed, rising from the couch, "He is struggling, Chief. I'm doing my best but he is really hurting." Gabby hated seeing Matt that way, over the last four weeks, they had gotten closer, a mutual understanding of what was going on in each other's lives, an understanding of why they had both been acting the way they had. Gabby was starting to see the Matt that Shay had described; she was seeing him in a completely different way to what she had thought of him originally.

"Well I'm glad he has you then, Dawson. Look after him." With a quick nod, Gabby made her way out of Boden's office. She needed to do something; not being able to actually help Matt was starting to get to her.

Gabby pressed her hands down harshly against the wound, she was trying to stop the bleeding, trying to stop the wound from getting worse. "Shay, come on! We gotta get in there." She wasn't sure how she ended up almost sitting on Mills chest, being wheeled into the emergency room of Lakeshore. Matt, Kelly and Boden all followed them inside, the rest of the fire fighters following behind, fear coming over them as they heard the panic in Gabby's voice. They knew things were very, very bad.

Nurses and doctors swarmed to their side, all of them talking over one another, trying to work out what was going on. "25 year old male, fell three stories, impaled on a rebar, pulse was strong on route, losing a lot of blood, in and out of consciousness, awake at the scene."

It had all happened too quickly, Matt and Mills had been checking over an old building, floor by floor they checked each room, clearing them as they went. On their way back down to the main floor, the creaking sound became overwhelming, panic had crossed both Casey and Mills face, both realising that they didn't have much time left, they needed to get out. Now.

Hitting the third level stairs, the creaking worsened, giving way under their weight, sending them both free falling to the basement below. "Casey report!" Somewhere in the back of his head, Matt could hear the sound of Boden's voice, calling out to him. Rolling onto his side slowly, Matt looked around, pushing off his mask; Matt coughed loudly, "We are in the basement Chief, stairs collapsed in…"

That's when he realised that it was not just him in that basement, Mills was with him too. Quickly he looked around, Mills laying not far from him, still, his pass alarm sounding. "Chief, Mills is hurt, he ah…" Matt scrambled over to Mills side, looking over him, he coughed deeply again, the fall had hurt him as well, his side and back hurting, it was hard to breath but Mills was hurt, he had to focus on him now. "Chief, we need a medic down here now, Mills looks like he has been impaled by a rebar."

The steel metal rod was sticking out the side of his jacket, the fall landing him directly onto the rubble, the old steel factory a hot bed of possible trouble they hoped wouldn't cost them. But it had.

The next thing Matt knew, Kelly and Capp were making their way down to them, a stokes basket following. Bringing them both up to the waiting ambulance, Gabby and Shay rushing to their side, moving hurriedly over Mills.

All Matt could do was stand back while they loaded him into the back of the ambo, Gabby grabbing him by the arm and almost forcing him in as well, something about getting him checked out tumbling from her lips. Although he was numb, watching Mills the way he was, he was terrified.

And now he was standing in the middle of the waiting room, the rest of 51 sitting against the chairs, dirty and tired, silent and scared. But he couldn't sit; he had to stand, staring down the hallway to where they had taken Mills, Gabby and Shay emerging from that same hallway minutes later. Gabby covered in dry blood, Shay shaking her head as they took a seat, Kelly holding them both close as they rested their heads against his shoulders.

And so they waited, people coming and going as they sat stoically, the occasional sigh or cough or rustle as someone moved to a more comfortable position. It wasn't until Gabby raised her head from Kelly's shoulder, almost an hour later, that she noticed the blood that had been slowly dripping down Matt's arm, appearing subtly from underneath his jacket, tickling down his fingers before landing on the floor. "Matt…" Her voice was harsh, thick.

He looked up towards her; both their eyes brimming with unshed tears. She stood slowly, getting the attention of those around them, watching them closely, "Your arm…" That's when he noticed the blood as well, staring down at it he thought.

How long had he been bleeding? Why wasn't he in any pain? "I didn't even feel it…" He was unsure as to what had actually happened, remembering the fall but nothing else.

Slowly Gabby raised her hands, helping him remove his coat, he winced in pain, something had hurt his shoulder, something was making him bleed. Pulling his shirt away from his neck, Gabby sighed, his BA unit had cut into his neck and shoulder when he had landed in that basement, they hadn't even thought about getting him checked out, too worried about Mills.

"Come on, let's get you checked out. I want to make sure you don't have any rib damage." She tried to turn him away from the group, really wanting to make sure he was ok, but he protested, looking back towards where Mills was. "Hey, he is going to be a while and I want to make sure you are ok…" Something in her voice made him look down, seeing the pleading in her eyes but also the sternness, she was getting back into medic mode to make him understand that she was serious.

With one last glance down the hallway, Matt nodded, letting Gabby move them both away from the group, a warm hand on his back as they walked to the nurses station, asking for a doctor to come and check him out.

Matt sat nervously on the bed as he waited for his results, he had been checked over, scanned, poked and prodded and now he was just cold, sitting on that bed in just his turn out pants, he just wanted to put a shirt back on. Not only that, Gabby was sitting by his side, he had asked her to stay, needing the support in case something was wrong but now he was just nervous to have her there.

"OK, Matt…" The doctor walked back into the room, iPad in hand, smile on his face, " You've got a bit of bruising, so you will be a bit sore for a few days, I'm going to have you take off the next shift just to let your ribs rest but other than that, you are good to go."

Matt sighed deeply, happy to hear that he was going to be ok, but still worried about Mills. Glancing over to Gabby, he smiled when he saw how happy she was, reaching for her, he brought her to his side, hugging her tightly, "Told you I was going to be." He whispered in her ear, making her laugh against him.

"Yeah I know, but with Mills…I just got worried…" was her reply, Matt nodding, knowing exactly what she was talking about.

"Ah doc, any news on the other fire fighter that was brought in? Peter Mills?" Gabby pulled away from Matt as he asked, still staying in his arms though, needing to know he was ok. They looked back at the doctor, watching as he thought for a moment, he wasn't supposed to tell them anything, they weren't family but he also knew that fire fighters were family.

Sighing, he looked down at his iPad, "Looks like he is going to be ok. He lost a lot of blood but so far it looks like surgery went well. They are moving him to recovery soon. Let me just get you some meds for the pain and you can go out and be with the rest of your house." Matt and Gabby nodded, watching as he moved away, back out the door and down the hallway.

"Hey…you ok?" Matt noticed that Gabby was quiet for a bit, her face blank as she looked out the side window.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm alright…" hugging him tightly once more, she sighed, "I'm just really happy you're going to be ok. I was worried…" Scrunching up his face, Matt held her closely, he didn't like that she worried about him, she really shouldn't worry about him.

Matt smiled to himself as he watched Gabby move around the bar, her hips swaying to the music, laughing at something Shay had said behind her, Kelly reaching out to try and grab for her. He loved to hear her laugh and see her smile, she had become his closest friend, ever since that day with Hallie, she had been there for him, not that he really deserved it but she was there for him and he hoped that he was there for her. Last shift had been crazy, they were busy and then the accident with Mills, he was beyond happy that he was going to be ok, a celebratory drink was required.

"Can I get you another, Matt?" Gabby had made her way over to him, her smile widening when she saw him smiling back at her. She was glad to see him come into Molly's over and hour ago, she was glad to see him still there and she was glad to see that he was still sober, she just hoped that he stayed that way. Matt thought for a moment, he wasn't going to let what happened a couple of week ago happen again, he wasn't going to let her turn up at his home once again and find him passed out and living in filth.

He was better than that, she was making him want to be better than that and so he smiled and shook his head. He had only had three beers that night, nothing before he had come to Molly's and he was damn sure he wasn't going to have anything afterwards.

Gabby's eyes lit up when he shook his head, she hadn't expected him to say no, his past history showing that he had a thing for alcohol at the moment but something had clearly changed, something good. Leaning over the bar Gabby reached for his hand, holding it tightly, she smiled, "I'm proud of you Matt." Her smile glowing as he returned it, their hands held tightly together, their eyes locked, holding onto the feeling of each other's strength, something they would both need.

Thoughts? :D