A/N: First of all, to anyone who has me on Author Alert or follows me on Tumblr, sorry about all the robots. Gundam 00 Week will be over soon.

Second, large swathes of this chapter can be credited to my amazing beta miladyRanger, who helped me prep for writing this and let me use some of the scenarios and phrasing she came up with (I'd credit her with specific bits if either of us remembered who did what).

Third, it should be noted that everyone from Nagano who canonically uses a Nagano dialect has an accent, but I'm writing it as a lighter accent than Osakan, because it's a transitional dialect between the Eastern dialects (like Shinichi & co.'s Tokyo dialect) and Heiji's Western Kansai dialect. Thus, it may not always be noticeable in every line in characters who do not speak as...well, rudely, as Kansuke. There's a little more about this in the end-note, if you're interested.

Chapter 34

The second they were invited in, the entire group dashed past Kansuke and into the living room, trailing luggage. Every single one ignored the armchair, and they all practically collapsed in a lopsided little half-circle on the floor, with Hakuba at the center. He didn't miss both Hattori and not-Kudou scanning the room for quick exits, either-though he thought Hakuba might have actually managed to do it while he wasn't looking. A quick headcount revealed that there were five of them, total-Conan, Hattori, Hakuba Saguru, and the two whose names he didn't know. Well, best to fix that before he started trying to wring out explanations.

"Okay, who are you people?" he asked, settling into the armchair. Hey, it was comfortable and also forced the kids to look up at him if they wanted to make eye contact.

Hattori blinked. "We've...met before?" he said, looking confused.

Kansuke glared. "Not you, the other two, the ones who aren't Sleepin' Kogoro's ward or the kid I spent the last month tryin' to find."

Hakuba winced.

Hattori looked decidedly nervous, even as he shifted a still-sleeping Conan into his lap. "Uh, that's Kuroba Kaito," he said, gesturing to maybe-Kudou. "He goes-went-um-well, he's Hakuba's classmate?"

Kuroba grinned at him like an office lady trying to get out of parking tickets.

"And that's Hondou Eisuke," Hattori added, gesturing at glasses kid. "He's…"

"Kudou-san asked me to help with the investigation," Hondou said smoothly.

"You a detective?" Kansuke asked, curious. The name sure wasn't ringing any bells.

"I helped in other ways," Eisuke said, almost primly, which wasn't exactly a "no." This kid required watching, clearly.

"And what about you?" Kansuke asked Kuroba, who stiffened under his gaze. "What'd they drag a classmate all the way to Nagano to do?"

"To Nagano, right," Kuroba said, drawing out the last word. "I, well, basically pushed my way into the investigation? I kept bothering them about being allowed to help until they finally let me."

"Okay, you," he said, turning to Hakuba, next. The kid was decidedly skinnier than he remembered, but not as bad as Kansuke had expected. Well, to be fair, he was alive, which was far better than Kansuke had expected to begin with, but he also looked like he'd eaten at some point in the last two months. And slept, even, though not much. Also, if he'd gotten hurt, it was either someplace hidden by his clothes or already healed. That said, the look in his eyes and his posture were both wary.

"Yes?" Hakuba asked softly.

"Just what the h*** were you thinkin', runnin' off like that?" he demanded. "You worried the h*** out of your dad! Had those weirdo KID-chasers from Tokyo panickin' over you, too-and for that matter, do you even realize how many officers we had on your case? It wasn't jus' a few cops. What do you have to say for yourself?"

Hakuba stared back at him, eyes wide and unsettlingly blank.

"There was a misunderstanding," Kuroba said quietly. "I don't think he's up to explaining himself right now, but he-there was some stuff he was confused about."

"I-ah-yes," Hakuba managed. There was still something a bit distant in his expression.

Okay, so he's got some mental stuff goin' on, Kansuke thought. Now for the million-dollar-question-is it new mental stuff, or the same things his dad was frettin' over before he made a run for it?

"You okay, kid?" he asked.

Hakuba just blinked at him. Real reassuring.

"If this is gonna be a real long conversation, is there someplace we can put Ku-Conan so he's away from all the noise?" Hattori asked.

Probably a deliberate distraction, but that by itself was interesting, because Hattori and Hakuba did not like each other. Both of them would explain why at length if asked about it. Had something actually happened to make Hattori sympathetic to Hakuba, and if so, what?

"What's wrong with the kid?" Kansuke asked. "You're all fretting over him."

"Are we?" Kuroba asked, and he didn't even look like he was lying, there wasn't even a twitch of a tell. Okay, both of the strange kids needed watching, wonderful.

"Don't bother; we were being obvious," Hattori said. "He got sick while we were in the taxi. He jus' needs ta sleep it off and he'll be fine. He'd prob'ly be fine by now, but the plane ride and the way we had to leave on top o' each other-"

"Plane ride?" Kansuke asked. "You came here from the airport?"

"Yes," Hondou said, like this should have been obvious. "How else-"

"That's an hour's drive from here, at least-and there are ways to get around Japan besides flyin'," Kansuke said.

All of the boys who were awake looked at him with varying degrees of amused incredulity. Even Hakuba had snapped out of whatever state he'd been in, just to look at Kansuke with the exact same patronizing expression Officer Kai had used on him when he'd tried to tag along to crime scenes at Conan's age.

Hondou was the first to actually say anything. "We haven't been in Japan," he said, almost laughing. "I haven't been in Japan for...months, goodness."

"Then where were you?"

"London," Hakuba said, quietly. "They tracked me there, and then came after me. I'm sorry; they ought not to have missed school on my account."

"That is not even remotely the issue-" Kuroba started loudly.

Hattori made a hushing noise, finger to his lips, and glared daggers at him, other arm curled protectively around Conan.

"So you all just got off an international flight," Kansuke asked, trying to process all of this. "And Conan's sick, and you-found Hakuba-and-I have yet to hear an answer to the are you okay question, by the way."

"There are some small lacerations on my forearm, but they've been bandaged," Hakuba said quietly. "I had an altercation with a criminal. I am otherwise uninjured."

No answers about his mental state, but then again, I'm not sure what I was expecting there, Kansuke thought, rueful.

"An' the rest of you?" he asked aloud.

"Kuroba's back is hurt, so if you actually have a guest futon, he should get it," Hattori said. "The rest of us can probably deal with the floor."

Hakuba's eyes narrowed. "It's been two months. I don't expect it's completely healed, but-"

"Ah," Kuroba said. "About that."

"If I call him an idiot are you going to get insulted?" Hattori asked, which made absolutely no sense, but then again, not much of this conversation made sense to begin with.

"No," Hakuba said, expression dark. "May I know why you are calling him that?"

Hattori opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Kuroba said, "You didn't have a lot of time to keep up with Japanese newspapers while you were away, did you?"

Hakuba's eyes narrowed further for a second, then flew wide with dismay. "Kuroba-san, you did not!" he exclaimed, grabbing the other boy by the arms.

"I had to talk to your dad!" Kuroba said, jerking out of his grip with a small wince.

"You-you could have-how badly were you hurt?" Hakuba asked, sounding desperately worried.

"I, uh, it reopened," Kuroba all but whispered.

"Hattori-san is right, and I cannot believe I've said that," Hakuba said. "I can't even leave the country without you nearly getting yourself killed-"

"Would you kids mind explainin' literally any of that?" Kansuke asked, annoyed.

Kuroba and Hakuba glanced over at him in clear surprise. By their expressions, they'd forgotten about him completely.

"Alternately, what if we did not, and instead you allowed us to go to sleep immediately?" Hakuba suggested.

Kansuke didn't dignify that suggestion with a response.

"Kuroba-kun fell down some stairs and then tripped over his lack of self-preservation instincts," Eisuke said flatly. "It's really best if we just leave it at that."

"Hey!" Kuroba yelped, indignant.

"He ain't wrong," Hattori said flatly.

Kansuke resisted the urge to snap at them all again. They were coordinating this, somehow, this little barrage of information that was never quite what he wanted to know, and the only possible reason there could be for that behavior was that they really were trying to hide things.

Which was alarming, because, Hakuba aside, Hattori was a cop kid. He had no reason not to trust Kansuke...unless this was all somehow connected to that case of Kudou's he'd refused to talk about. Which would explain why the five of them were in his house in the small hours of the morning being ridiculously cagey and not explaining a single thing.

"All right, you know what, I'll let you sleep and save the rest of the questions for the morning if you give me just one straight answer," Kansuke said slowly.

Kuroba brightened. Hondou's expression smoothed out into something inscrutable. Hakuba and Hattori knew him well enough to immediately turn wary.

"Are the five of you in danger?" he asked.

Kuroba's expression suddenly mirrored Hondou's, except it was even more blank. Kansuke had the sudden urge ask the kid to do it again so he could take video and use it to train the Nagano riot police, because that shift in expression was one of the most unsettling things he'd seen in weeks.

And, okay, that thought was probably a product of exhaustion, but the point stood. The kid's face was creepy.

Hattori was glowering outright, Hondou's expression hadn't changed, and Hakuba...Hakuba's face was doing the same thing as Kuroba's, but Kansuke expected it from him. The kid's face was always stuck on "blank, polite, neutral, with maybe a little disdain" so it didn't seem weird to see it on his face.

No, the weird part had been the sudden shift. He'd gone from a big grin to the kind of gameface most cops took a few years to develop.

Like h*** he was just Hakuba's classmate.

And none of them had answered. Even Hattori, the eternal loudmouth, was keeping quiet.

"So you'd rather I keep askin' questions, then?" Kansuke asked. "Because I can do that. But I'd like to get some sleep before morning, and I think you would, too."

Hattori glanced at Kuroba, who slumped, just slightly, and then at Hondou, who sighed.

"Yeah, we hit a little trouble on our way out of England," Hattori said quietly. "You said one question. Where can we sleep?"

Kansuke grinned a bit, despite himself. They had him there. "Down the hall, second door to the left. There's a futon laid out, and there might be another one in the wardrobe. The rest of you are on your own."

"Right," Hattori said. "Bathroom?"

"End of the hall," Kansuke said.

Hattori got to his feet smoothly, not even jostling Conan, and started down the hall. Kuroba and Hakuba followed almost immediately, only pausing to gather the luggage. Only Hondou hung back.

"Can I ask you a favor?" he said, hesitant, as he stood.

"You can ask," Kansuke replied.

Hondou grinned at him, almost fondly, and said, "I don't want you to feel any obligation to provide us with food tomorrow, but if you're making breakfast, even just for yourself, could you perhaps avoid fish?"

"Why?" Kansuke asked, utterly baffled.

"As a favor," Hondou said.

"But why is that a favor?" Kansuke asked. "Do you know somethin' 'bout the fish in my house that I don't?"

The kid's eyes went wide. "No, nothing like that-why am I surrounded by paranoid people?"

"You got involved in a missing persons investigation; were you expecting optimism?" Kansuke asked.

"I guess not," Hondou said, sounding disheartened. "But will you do it?"

"Are you gonna explain why?" Kansuke asked.

"Not except under very extreme duress," Hondou said brightly.

Kansuke was too tired for this. "Fine, whatever, vegetarian breakfast. But you kids are explainin' yourselves tomorrow."

"Answering questions is one thing, Inspector," Hondou said, with a tired little laugh. "But if you're expecting explanations for any of those guys, I'll be waiting right along with you."

And with that, he padded down the hallway after the others. Kansuke listened after him, and caught a snatch of conversation as he opened the door to the spare room.

"-you said he was sharp, you didn't say he was you and Tantei-kun put together, with authority-"

But the speaker-Kuroba, it sounded like-was cut off as soon as Hondou shut the door behind him.

Well, it seems like I've got the kids on guard, Kansuke thought wryly. I'd feel better if they didn't have me the same way. Think it's time I call in help.

He made his way to the kitchen, hoping he was safely out of range of even the most attentive ears, and pulled out his cell phone.

He didn't bother dialing-the right contact was easy to find. He listened to the phone ring for about a minute before anyone picked up.

"Hello?"

"Koumei," Kansuke said. "I need your help."

Morofushi's voice was thick with sleep. "Kansuke-kun? Are you all right? It's-why are you callin' me now?"

"I'm fine," Kansuke said, wincing a bit. He hadn't meant to actually worry Morofushi. "It's not me. My house is full of children."

"At this hour?" Morofushi asked, almost blandly. "How did you manage that?"

"They showed up on my porch sayin' they couldn't find a hotel," Kansuke said.

"And so you let them stay?" Morofushi asked. "That isn't very like you, Kansuke-kun-"

"Well, one of them's Hakuba Saguru, so I couldn't very well let him wander off again," Kansuke said.

"Your missing person turned up on your porch in the middle of the night?" Morofushi asked. Kansuke could practically hear the raised eyebrow.

"The detective boy from Osaka and Mouri's ward showed up with him," Kansuke said. "You remember how I said Hattori was investigatin'? Apparently, they found him, and decided to bring him here."

"So how many amateur detectives do you have under your roof?" Morofushi asked, sounding amused.

"I don't actually know," Kansuke said. "There's those three, and two others that claim they aren't detectives. I don't believe them."

"Really?" Morofushi sounded intrigued now.

"They're weird, and I caught at least one of them checkin' my living room for exits," Kansuke said. "Which reminds me. They're in trouble. The kids are. And they're bein' real obvious about not wantin' to talk details."

"I see why you called me," Morofushi said. "Am I to be the good cop, or the bad?"

"I was thinkin' we could switch off, and keep 'em off balance," Kansuke replied, cheered. I can always count on Koumei. "Not too off balance, though. They're not tellin' me things, but it's pretty obvious that they're shaken up. Especially Hakuba."

"A lot can happen to a lone eighteen-year-old in two months," Koumei said quietly.

"He's okay physically, for the most part," Kansuke reported. "Some cuts on his arm from a fight with a criminal, of all things, and that's it. But he spaced the h*** out when I asked him why he ran, and I don't think it was because he was too tired to answer."

"That is worryin', yes," Koumei said.

"Thank you for stating the obvious," Kansuke huffed. "The others were edgy, too. And Conan's apparently sick."

"Do you even have any medicine in children's dosages around your house?" Morofushi asked.

"No, but they didn't ask for any," Kansuke said. "Which is weird, now that I think about it more. He was asleep, he slept through the entire conversation incudin' some borderline yellin', but Hattori insisted he'd be fine in the morning."

"Odd," Morofushi said. "Odder still that Inspector-General Hattori's child, of all people, would be distrustful of a police officer-"

"That's what I thought, too!" Kansuke agreed. "But I think this has to do with-well, I didn't tell you at the time because Hattori was insistin' that I didn't tell anyone, but seein' as this situation is going out of control fast-he's been in touch with Kudou Shinichi."

"The one the papers call the Great Detective of the East?" Morofushi asked. "That's...not a secret. Hattori and Kudou are known associates."

"Yeah, but apparently no one should be mentionin' it if they talk to Kudou, 'cause the reason no one can find him recently is that he's trying to hide from some specific, unfriendly people," Kansuke said. "Hattori implied pretty heavily that those people wanted him dead. He was pretty light on other details, though. I'm beginning to wonder if Kudou being involved in the investigation doesn't have somethin' to do with why they're in trouble, now. And why they won't say a thing about the trouble."

"If Kudou were in trouble, why didn't he simply go to the Tokyo police?" Morofushi asked. "From what I've heard, he's practically their golden child. If even half of what rumor says they let him get away with is accurate, they should be quick to his defense..."

"Hattori wouldn't talk about any of it inside of Osaka PD," Kansuke said flatly. "He was pretty d*** set on us going outside to talk about it."

Morofushi was quiet for a few seconds. "Hilarious as the thought is, I don't normally hope that you're bein' actively deceived by high school students."

"Jerk," Kansuke muttered. "But if your deductions are headin' the way mine are, let's hope we're both wrong. And in the meantime, come over here and help me handle this. I could use a second opinion, even if it is yours."

"Any other requests?" Morofushi asked, all feigned offense.

"Any spare futons you have, and...well, I don't think I have enough food to make breakfast for all of us," Kansuke answered. "Just don't bring fish."

"Whyever not?"

"If I knew, I'd tell you…"

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

A/N: Warnings for canon-typical levels of implied and actual child endangerment. Discussion of phobias and the general concepts of trauma and psychological issues. Hakuba "spaces out" once and it is not completely clear to the narrator what is happening but as readers you have enough data to surmise that he is probably having some sort of psychological episode, though what kind is left to you to conclude. Also, most of the teenagers spend the chapter feeling under threat and thus being some combination of scared and defensive, if not always obviously so.

I imagine Kansuke's and Morofushi's accents in this fic sounding something like American North Jersey accents. It's a light but noticeable accent that has some things in common with the dialect I'm using for Osakan but is also much less dramatic, and is more distinguishable by differences in vowel pronunciation than by the kind of syllable-dropping the accent I used for Osakan tends to feature. If you are imagining The Jersey Shore that is the wrong accent.

Thank you for reading, and please leave a review on the way out, if you like!