[Disclaimer] Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. I own the plot for this story.

If I tell you I love you. Can I keep you forever?

(Unknown)

Chapter 13

I need to tell them.

My sweaty hands leave fingerprints on the glass of orange juice in front of me on the table. Slowly, I lift it to my mouth and nip on it. You need to tell them. I take another sip. You need to tell them, you are gay and get over with it.

"You are quiet tonight." Kate says, nibbling on the slice of pineapple in her cocktail. "Aren't you well?" My youngest cousin is such a sensitive person. She can sense if something is wrong, even when she can't wrap her head around what exactly the wrong is.

I shake my head, forcing my facial muscles to stretch into a smile. "It's nothing. I am just a bit tired."

Kate shrugs her shoulders. Then she turns her full attention to my Bambi Eyes who looks ravishing tonight. Underneath the table her right knee is touching against my jean-covered thigh. She is doing it on purpose. Every time I shift and move a bit further from her leg, Bella turns closer to me. I feel too warm. It's all because of her.

"Bella, I can't thank you enough for lending the book to me." My cousin wraps an arm around Bella. "Wasn't it amazing? I loved it!"

For the next ten minutes, I watch like a passive bystander while my love interest and my cousin crush over the book. I envy Kate for how casual she is with touching Bella. The two of them really click well.

"You are so cute and pretty, Bella." Kate announces, waving the waitress to our table so we can order new drinks. I am determined to stay sober tonight. It's difficult enough for me to concentrate around Bella when I don't have alcohol. "Oh Alice, isn't Bella just cute. I don't understand how someone as pretty as her can be single."

Bella's mouth twitches. She pulls the right side of her lower lip over her teeth. I jump when she places her left hand above my knee and squeezes it. "There is someone I really like. But I am not sure if the interest is mutual."

There is no one I know in the whole world who likes to gossip more than Kate. She releases the straw between her fingers and speaks up. "What does he look like? I bet he's handsome."

"It's her, not him." Bella says and her lips curl into a smile at the last word. "The person I like is a woman."

For a full, endless feeling minute, our entire table is silent. The music from the club buzzes in my ear. Blood rushes through my head. I want to say something, but my brain seems unable to remember how to speak.

"What do you mean it's a girl?" Kate asks. "Are you a lesbian?" Kate who has slurped down two cocktails gets protective over her new best friend when she sees the look on Bella's face. "You don't have to tell them. You can tell me." She leans closer to Bella. "You can tell me. I've never met a lesbian in my life. You are my first."

I hate Tanya for the way she starts laughing. She laughs, and I know it's not because of the wine she had. T. can handle a lot of liquor before she even starts to get tipsy.

"Come on. You honestly think you've never met a lesbian before in your life? Are you honestly that naïve, Kate?"

Is this loud ringing in my ear my own heartbeat? You can't hear your own heartbeat, right? I lift my hand to my forehead to wipe off a bit of perspiration. My knees quiver. I can't manage to keep my leg still.

Suddenly, there's a hand on it, a small, warm hand with a leather cuff around its wrist. Bella is trying to help me calm, but unfortunately she is only making me more nervous by touching me.

I open my mouth to speak but only a cracked cough comes out as an audible response. I take Tanya's glass with aMartini and take a sip. So much for staying away from alcohol…

"I am the lesbian that you know." I say, looking down at the bowl of peanuts on the table instead of making eye-contact with my cousins.

Tanya pets my shoulder as if I was a little dog that has just learned a new trick. "Well, that was about time. Congratulations. Can I have my drink back now? You are old enough to order your own."

Kate gasps. She looks from Bella to me and finally to her older sister. "You knew? Alice, are you sure? I mean, how do you know that you are a lesbian? You've never had a girlfriend."

"Correction, she never had a girlfriend that you knew about." Tanya states while she twists a wisp of her hair around her fingertip as if she's bored. "Well, if you wouldn't stick your nose into books 24/7 you wouldn't miss all of the interesting things happening around you."

My head is spinning. It's like telling Kate has lifted a huge weight from my lungs, and now my body doesn't know how to handle all the extra-oxygen. I stand up and hold on to the table to steady myself. I mumble something about needing the restrooms and stumble towards them at the end of the hall. I used to be good at walking on heels, didn't I?

Inside the restroom, I wet some paper towels and press them against my neck. I lean over the sink and take deep breaths.

"Are you alright?" Bella asks, her arms wrapping around me from behind. Her mouth is against my ear. I can feel her breathe against my skin and it sets me on fire. "I am so very proud of you." Her lips touch against my ear, then against the spot underneath my dangling earring. The prickly crawling through my veins is incredible. I moan, and her mouth comes down again. This time her lips stay glued to my skin for a little longer. Her mouth is soft and warm, very warm.

I close my eyes and turn my head. Bella's hand cups my jaw. "Kiss me." I whisper. I need to have her mouth touch mine so very much. "Bella, please kiss me."

Bella's thumb glides over my lower lip as if she's wiping away a bit of my lip-gloss. "You are so fucking beautiful, Ali. The prettiest woman I have ever seen."

As much as I appreciate her complimenting me, can she just kiss me now? I feel like I am about to burst into a million pieces if she doesn't kiss me right now. Her thumb touches my upper lip. Does she have issues with lip gloss? I can go without it, for her.

I am about to whimper another please to Bambi Eyes, when the door to the restroom is pulled open abruptly.

There are people who get embarrassed when they interrupt other people's private moments. Tanya is not one of them. "Good, you are not naked yet, saves us time." She says, rolling the sleeves of her leather jacket up and down again. "We need to leave. Now."

Bella, who has dropped her arms from around me when the door opened, takes another step further from me. I turn around and lean back against the sink. "Why? We just got here."

The night is going great for me so far. I came out to Kate. Bella needs like one more cocktail to get over her shyness and then, everything will be possible. Why is Tanya trying to ruin that for me?

"It's an emergency." T. explains, wiping a bit of invisible sweat from her forehead. "Iri called crying. You know how she is like when she gets all hysterical?"

I nod. "Sure." I wait for Tanya to laugh. We always laugh when her sister throws one of her temper tantrums. Irina can cry and yell over the smallest things. They are forgotten even before the crocodile tears have dried.

"She sounded bad." Tanya explains. "I need to go and pick her up. Oh boy, if that French boy made a wrong move on her, I will…well, I don't know yet, but there will be some balls squeezing involved." She grabs my hand and tugs on it. "Come on, Mary Alice, let's go."

Nobody in the world calls me Mary Alice, unless it's my parents when I got in real trouble as a kid. My first name Mary comes from my father's mother and she wasn't a very lovable person.

I reach for Bella's hand. Her warm fingers weave through mine, and I doubt I will be able to let go of them for a very long time.

My heart does funny little backflips while I sit next to Bella on the backseat of Tanya's car. My cousin is getting more and more agitated the closer we get to the restaurant, where we are supposed to pick up Irina.

"This is what happens when you date guys without introducing them to me first. Irina is so dumb. Let that be a warning to you." She snaps at Kate who is trying to make it look like she's not watching me and Bella in the car mirror. I smile and then wrap my arm around Bella to pull her closer to me. If Kate wants a show, I might as well give her a good one. I kiss Bella's cheek.

"So, how long have you guys been together?" Kate is now not even trying to cover her curiosity. "Long?"

I clear my throat. "We are not really together."

"We're not?" Bella asks back and for a moment I think she's going to cry. I am relieved when she bursts into a giggling high-pitched laughter instead. "God, you should have seen your face, Ali."

Tanya stops the car and takes a deep breath. Then, she takes off her rings and bracelet and hands them to Kate. "Whatever I do, you see nothing. Okay?"

We step out, I still hold on to my not-yet-girlfriend's hand. Usually when Tanya gets all agitated like that I try to calm her down. Right now, I am too much occupied with figuring out my emotions for Bambi Eyes. I am in love with her. And I don't know what to do. I mean, I can't just ask her to be my girlfriend. We are not twelve year olds.

"Hey," Bella whispers, leaning closer to me. Her breathe tickles the skin of my ear. "Tanya is not really going to beat up some guy? Is she?"

I have seen Tanya hitting boys since she was five years old. She is not a volatile person in general. She just can't stand anyone whom she loves getting hurt.

Instead of answering Bella's question, I simply shrug my shoulders.

Irina, who has been hovering on a thick stone next to the parking lot, rushes towards us. Her make-up is smeared. She has taken off her shoes and is bare-footed.

"Why did that take you so long? I have been out here for twenty minutes."

Tanya smacks her sister against the head. "Be glad we came to save your sorry ass. Now, where is French boy? Has he already left?"

Iri shakes her head. "No, he is still in there. I told him I needed to powder my nose." She sniffs and wipes her running nose on the back of her hand. "This is the most horrible day in my life."

I let go of Bella's hand and step closer to my cousin. "You are overreacting. Calm down now. Did he hurt you? Do you need a doctor?"

Bella hands a tissue to my hysterical cousin. Yes, that is right. Get used to my family. They are not easy to handle, but they belong to me. "Do you want us to call the police?"

Irina mumbles a thank you to Bella. "He didn't touch me. He's…oh my gosh, this is so horrible. I really liked him, you know?"

My patience has limits. Irina and her hysterical issues with not being able to handle her love life, is ruining the night for me. It's ruining time for me that I could have spent kissing and making out with my not-yet-girlfriend.

"What is wrong with him?" Kate asks her sister. "Was he being rude? Is he ugly?"

"Worse," Tanya sobs. "He is being a perfect gentleman. He's so fucking perfect but so…oh my god, he's so…so…black."

My apartment smells like fresh paint when I enter it. There are newspapers covering the floor. It feels good to be back in my own four walls again. I feel like I am not really prepared to have a special visitor like Bella here with me. But my apartment is better than hers where I have to sneeze and cough all the time. I am nervous and move back and forth on my feet before kicking off my heels.

"So, this is your place?" Bambi asks, taking off her jacket. "It's nice. But your kitchen is too small for my liking." I admire the strip of skin between her jeans and shirt when she bends down to take a look into my fridge. "You have wine and cheese, very nice."

She holds up both to me and wrinkles her nose. "The cheese looks like it's half-alive. Maybe we should stick to the wine."

I throw the cheese into the trash. "I am sorry I haven't done any grocery shopping in a while." I take the bottle from Bella's hands and place it on the counter. "I shouldn't drink alcohol. It makes me do stupid things. Would you love to have a glass?"

Her hands wrap around my waist. I can feel their warmth radiating through my top. "What kind of stupid things?"

"Just stupid things," I whisper, cupping her heart-shaped face between my hands. "People do lots of stupid things all the time."

I pull her head closer to mine. Her eyelashes flutter and I close mine as my lips touch against hers. I kiss her mouth very lightly. Then, I pull back and plant a second kiss against her very soft lips.

"Ali, ple-" she whimpers, but Bambi Eyes' attempt to say something is suffocated by my tongue sliding between her lips. I shiver when I touch against the tip of her tongue. She groans against my mouth and swirls a circular motion around my tongue with hers. I moan when she pulls back a bit and teasingly slowly runs the tip of her tongue over my bottom lip.

My hands glide under her shirt. I feel warm skin against my hands. She's so soft. It's like touching the finest silk. My fingertips reach thin lace.

I don't like how a moment later Bella's hands cover mine to push them gently but firmly away from her body. "Not yet," She says, her cheeks glowing beautifully. "You need to show me the rest of your apartment first."

"Kay," I mumble. "What room do you want to see first?"

"I think, your bedroom would be very interesting to see." Bella states, seductively lifting my hand to her lips to plant a kiss on each of my fingertips. "Show me?"

When Bella sits down at the corner of my bed a few moments later, I have to admit that she looks fucking perfect there. My heart beats so loud I can hear it ringing in my own ears. Or maybe that's just the blood rushing through my head.

"Do you bring all your women here?" Bella asks, leaning back against my pillows. "Do you?"

I sit down next to her and take her hand. "The only other women who have ever been inside here, are my cousins. And they don't count. We only watch movies and eat popcorn."

"I like popcorn." Bella giggles. "Too bad you don't have any food here."

"Are you hungry?" I ask, pushing her back against the pillows before straddling her lap. "If you are very hungry we could always order pizza."

"Maybe later," she whispers, placing her hands on my waist. "Maybe later." She grabs the hem of my shirt and pulls it higher. I shiver when her fingertips brush over my bare abdomen. I suck in my breath. "Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?"

I lift my arms, making it easier for her to pull the shirt over my head and toss it aside. "How beautiful?" I whisper, letting my hands caress her face with gentle touches. I have been told I am pretty before. Having her say it is different though. Her words are not an empty, superficial compliment. Bella doesn't just tell me she thinks me beautiful. She shows me by the way her lips and hands move gently over my upper body. My nipples get hard and sensitive when she cups my breasts through my bra.

She kisses my mouth, her tongue gliding smoothly against mine to massage it. I whimper when her fingertips stroke up my stomach very lightly. "There are no words." Bella mumbles, pressing her face between my breasts. "No words could ever be enough."

I moan, arching my back as her tongue glides up and down between my breasts. I shift on her lap, rubbing myself against the magnificent being underneath me. "Be mine," I say. "Please?"

Bella's hot mouth plants a row of kisses up my sternum to suck the skin on my throat between her lips. I am a mess of sweaty arousal and staccato like heartbeats when her lips finally reach my mouth again. "Oh Ali, can't you see that I have no choice in this? You are way too irresistible to say no to you."