Disclaimer: I do not own anything Twilight because the wonderful SM has that privilege.

I am so glad I'm getting this chapter up! Woot Woot. I had to do this thing old school as in paper and pencil/pen. Lol my computer died half way through writing this. I was freaking out, but since I love all ya all and wanted to finish, I put my pen to work. Mind you I have sores and pain in my hand, maybe even carpel tunnel, but I did it just for you. Lol.

There are a lot of things happening with FF these days and I see a lot of people are going goofy about the stories. I must say it's frustrating and sad. I was part of the FF ban last weekend and spent the time working on my blog. I have moved all these wonderful chapters to this story over there Just In Case it becomes a necessity.

I have to thank my Beta Mandee for all your hard, crazy, and psychotic work throughout your crazy work day, in getting this chapter done. She is the bestest ever and can truly show me how crazy my stories can get some times. Especially, when written at 1am lol.

Now before any of you give me the WTF questions on reviews. The time line is screwy, but as true to my nature it has a purpose which will be revealed later. So be patient please lol.

Chapter 22: Hang time

EPOV

I can't believe I'm sitting here on this hard fucking couch in the ICU watching my beloved in an unmerciful coma. Four days. It's been four fucking days since we found her. It has been four fucking days of complete and total hell. I would love to forget what it was like to find her. No matter how hard I tried, that image was burned into my mind forever. It was on a continuous loop and it just wouldn't stop. I remember everything all too clearly.

My knees nearly buckled as I got to the stretcher where the paramedics were working on Bella.

"My God" I whispered as I reached the ambulance.

Isabella was a sight I had missed, but what I saw was completely unexpected. I thought we would find her and there would be a happy reunion. It was stupid, but I wanted the movie reunion. She would look up and gasp at the sight of me. She'd run into my arms and I would hold her and tell her everything was going to be fine and she was safe now. I didn't expect my entire fucking world falling away at my feet because she was definitely not fine. I had to swallow hard over the lump in my throat as I looked at her.

She was completely naked under the sheet that was draped over her midsection. She looked thinner than a twelve year old girl and I could see the shape of her ribs under the blanket. Her beautiful brown hair was so filthy it was now a grey color. I skipped over her face and looked at her arms and legs. There were bruises of different stages on both of her arms. There was a very dark purple one around her bicep as though someone had held her roughly there. I just knew there would be more all over her body. I moved my eyes to her face and had to clench my jaw so I wouldn't break down. Bella's lips were thinner and very blue and her cheeks were sunken in. The blue tint to her lips and her non moving chest made my legs buckle. I locked them in place so I would not fall where I stood. I tried to swallow against the lump again but it was useless. Tears started falling down my face as I looked at her eyes. They were closed, but I could see the eyes that I had stared into many times. The fear of those eyes opening and them being lifeless made my heart ache so much more. The worst part was the fact that Bella's body was completely lifeless as it lay on the gurney. She was dead…we were too late and she was dead.

"Edward you need to move so they can do their job." Sam said by my ear bringing me out of my trance.

"She's…dead" I said as the tears streamed down my cheek. I didn't bother wiping them away. The woman I loved and who held my heart and my world in her hands was laying dead before me.

"No…she's not dead she still breathing…and we'll save her sir." One of the EMT's said as Sam pulled me a few steps back from the gurney.

"She's a-alive?" I whispered as the pift…pift…pift…of the blood pressure cuff started.

"Breathing is shallow…BP is seventy-three over sixty…I think she's Septic…stabilize her fast."

I stood there watching, but not really aware of anything as they continued to work on stabilizing her enough for transport. Nothing was going through my mind and I'm not even sure I blinked as I realized the woman that I loved was probably never coming back to me. I was going to lose her either from death because she was not going to make it or because whatever hell she went through here in this fucking shit-hole wouldn't allow us to go forward.

"Are you going with them?" I heard faintly as I just stood there in my daze not registering what I was being asked.

"Edward…Edward," I looked to my right and Waylon was standing next to me with his eyebrows raised in question.

"What…did-"

"Are you riding with Bella in the ambulance? They are ready to take her." Waylon said nodding toward the ambulance.

"Uh…yeah." I answered and climbed in like a zombie. The ambulance took off and all I could do was stare at her bruised naked body on the gurney.

"What did they do to you?" I whispered as we sped off down the road. Suddenly all of the machines starting going off at once. The paramedics were moving around in the back of the ambulance grabbing items from all over the place. One of them removed the sheet from Bella's chest and grabbed the defibrillator paddles. Before I knew what was happening he was shouting "CLEAR" and Bella's body was convulsing up off of the stretcher.

I shook my head and rubbed my face to bring me back out of the memory. I don't remember the ambulance ride or arriving here. They tell me it was because I went into shock when Bella started to flat line. I didn't come around apparently until the doctor was in mid sentence explaining what was happening in the OR.

"We'll do everything we can but things are touch and go at the moment...She's coded twice but we've been able to stabilize her both times…she's in critical condition and in a very dangerous situation…we're doing everything we can to get to where we can address her most serious issues first, which are many. She has internal bleeding which we have to stop, but it's difficult because her organs are slowly shutting down from the Sepsis…and she has been drugged with Salvia Divinorum, which we are not exactly sure the kind of effects the medications we're feeding through her IV will have on her or what reaction it will take because of it." There was more blah…blah…blahing from the doctor as I started to pace. Charlie signed release papers so the doctor could operate and take whatever necessary actions he needed to take.

Then it was a case of sit down and fucking wait with a side of waiting. Everyone had stuck around for the first few hours. Even Billy and his spawn Jacob. They sat far from each other and didn't engage in any conversation. Emmett and Rose were the first to leave. They had shit to still buy for Christmas, which I had totally forgotten about. It nearly killed them to walk away, but I reassured them there was nothing they could do so they should just go. I knew I should be angry with them for leaving in this type of situation, but what good was it for everyone to stop their lives. Besides, it also meant my parents would be here any day to celebrate the Holidays. Yippie! Alice and Jasper left about an hour after Emmett and Rose, they both wanted some decent coffee and some better food. They came back about forty minutes later with star bucks, doughnuts, and a shit load of Chinese food. They said it was so we didn't have to eat the cafeteria slop. I knew it was because they didn't want us to have to leave the waiting room just in case. They sat and ate with us and then decided to go home and sleep and relieve me in the morning. Which, was never going to happen, but I didn't tell them that. The rest of them, Jacob, Billy, Paul and the other guys who helped get Bella out, disappeared a little at a time. Pretty soon Charlie, Sam and I were all that were left. I wasn't surprised to see that Waylon had slipped out. Charlie sent Waylon on a fishing exposition about everything and anything to do with Salvia. It turned out to be one hell of a drug. Waylon found out more than I would have expected, but it was what Charlie needed. He left as soon as he read the sheet Waylon had sent over. Charlie handed it to me on his way out the door and I nearly died as I read it:

Charlie,

I did some digging and my findings are disturbing:

Salvia Divinorum is a psychoactive plant which can induce dissociative effects and is a potent producer of "visions" and other hallucinatory experiences. It's found in very specific places closest is Mexico. Most shamans have used it in their spiritual healing sessions and its very potent. It is legal in most countries. It's easy to come by in the United States even though they have asked for prohibition in some places. The history of the plant is not well known, and there has been no definitive answer to the question of its origin. It causes Psychedelic experiences variations on how extensive depends on the dosage, the effects may include:

Uncontrollable laughter

Past memories, such as revisiting places from childhood memory

Sensations of motion, or being pulled or twisted by forces

Visions of membranes, films and various two-dimensional surfaces

Merging with or becoming objects

Overlapping realities, such as the perception of being in several locations at once

I will find out where this shit came from and see if I can get a lead on who bought it. You know how to find me I'll be in touch.

Waylon

I rubbed my face as Bella let out a moan and became more restless. When someone's in a coma this shit isn't suppose to happen. Although with the fact it's drug induced by the doctors who knows what the fuck the case may be. There are no brain injuries and I'm not a fucking moron. My dad is a fucking doctor for Christ sakes. I know that shit shouldn't be used sparingly. They are using fucking barbiturates that aren't all that safe, especially when there is no sign of brain trauma. It's a possibility that this medication could cause more problems than not.

The doctors said, however, it was because she was so traumatized they decided to take this drastic action. When everything started happening with the seizures and her wigging out, they said that even in her comatose state it's a possibility that her brain is letting the memories out.

They say, "don't worry it's normal" but that's bullshit. No one should be suffering like this and I just get to sit here and do nothing about the whole fucking situation. Two days before, when she was restless, I would have walked over and touched her arm or smoothed her hair but not now. If I come in contact anywhere at all on her, her body goes into a free-for-all. I would have taken it to heart but it happened if anyone touched her. The heart monitor starts going crazy and spasms take over and she starts thrashing in her bed while tears stream down her face. I get to watch it all unfold. It is so hard trying not to think about what she's seeing or reliving in her mind. I try to keep hope because the rape kit they did had traces of semen but there wasn't anything suggesting that Bella had been sexually abused. It showed no signs of sexual intercourse. I just can't fucking understand how they came to that conclusion. I watch TV. just like everyone else and I'm not a fucking douche on the subject. How the fuck is there jizz but no sign of sexual assault? It makes no fucking sense.

"Edward" I look toward the door.

"Charlie."

"How is she?" He asks as he walks over to me.

"The same...still having terrors." I shrug "and I feel fucking worthless not being able to fix it." I run my hand through my hair as I stand up.

"The doc says he's going to try and bring her out of it tomorrow."

"Really?...is it safe?"

Charlie crosses his arms over his chest as he looks at Bella. "I don't know kid, but I can't do shit about this case until she tells us something." He turns back toward me and I can see it in his face. That isn't the only reason he wants her to wake up. He wants the same thing I do. To be able to look into her eyes and see that she is still in there. To know that they may have taken her and did god only knows what to her, but they didn't break her or take her soul from us.

"But if it gets too traumatic for her I will be fucking pushing for them to put her back under." Charlie growls.

"Embry still not saying anything?" I ask trying to not think about what may happen when she wakes up.

"Oh he's saying all kinds of shit." Charlie says as he rubs his eyes in exasperation. "Problem is every time Paul and Sam question him they get gibberish about how we stole his wife and it makes no sense. The shrinks have been working with him but they are as lost as we are."

"Charlie." Sam comes through the door. He looks at Bella and grimaces.

"She doing any better?" He asks as Paul walks in and falls in next to him.

"She's the same...what's up?" Charlie asks looking between them.

"Paul and I are going to head out and do another sweep of the cabin to see if we missed something." Sam says.

"We're hoping to find something that might help us get into that fuckers head and get a break." Paul growls.

"If you-" Charlie starts to reply but Bella's machines start going ape shit stopping all conversation.

"Is she alright?" Paul asks just as Bella's body bows off the bed.

"Fuck she's having another seizure. Get a doc in here!" I yell in a panic.

Hospital staff come flying in, someone grabs Bella to hold her and keep her from falling off the bed, but it only makes it worse. Another one silences the machines while someone shoves something into the IV and a forth shoves us out the door.

"You need to wait outside until we can stabilize her." She says as she turns and goes back into the room.

"Jesus...Christ. What just happened?" Paul asks.

"No fucking clue and that's the problem…the doctor say it's normal but this shit shouldn't be happening!" I growl through my teeth.

Charlie clasps my shoulder but looks at Paul and Sam. "Look, you two get to the cabin and see what-"

"I'm going with you." I say through clinched teeth.

"No you're not." Sam states matter-of-factly.

"The fuck if I'm not!" I spat.

"You don't need to see that shit Edward. That shit will give you nightmares." Charlie says.

"This shit gives me nightmares...what's one more?" I say pointing toward Bella's room. "Let me get a picture of where the fuck he kept her. Maybe…maybe I can help." I sigh in exasperation.

Charlie looks toward Sam and Paul and they just shrug.

"Fine." Charlie says crossing his arms across his chest. "But you will do every fucking thing Sam says." He points at me. "If you do one thing out of line, touch a God damned thing, or cause me any problems after this…I will fuck your shit up…I won't lose this case because you do something stupid." He says and crosses his arms back across his chest.

"Okay…alright…okay." I acquiesce.

"Sam take his ass with you…I'll stay here…if he gets out of line at all tie his ass to the bumper and drive back the long way."

"Sir." Sam says and turns on his heal.

We arrive at the cabin within the hour and I have to take a deep calming breath as we stop. I reach for the door and the damn thing is locked.

"What the fuck?" I growl.

Sam turns in his seat.

"I have been in here Edward and you need to be prepared…this shit will fuck you up more than her being in that hospital bed."

Without saying another word the locks disengage and Sam and Paul are climbing out. I shut my door and follow behind them. We walk around the back of the house, down some stairs and through a long hall. We stop in front of a door, but before I can make my way around them to get in Sam stops me.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Sam asks.

"Yes…I need this."

"You sure?" He asks again.

"Yes…I'm fucking sure." I growl. We walk through the door and I vomit like a mother fucker on the floor. Totally screwing up the crime scene and sure as shit pissing Charlie off in the process when he finds out.

"Fuck." I hear Sam and Paul moan.

"What the fuck is that smell?"

"It is rotting blood and decomposition." Sam answered matter-of-factly like it was no BFD.

I covered my nose and tried not to focus on the stench. It was like sandpaper in my nostrils followed by dead animal. I took a look around.

"Jesus...Christ." I said on a gasp.

The shit I was seeing made me want to scream. It was like I had stepped into the dungeon of the Iron Mask, with one difference. The fucking room I was standing in had surgical tools, saws, pliers, barbed wire and plastic and they were covered in blood.

"Fucking...hell..." I manage to get out before round two of the vomiting started.

Was I puking like a sissy bitch because of what happened here or the fact I was one step away from being like these sick fuckers? I didn't know. What I did know was my asshole felt like it was coming out my mouth as I continued vomiting. When I was finally able to stop the Vomit party, a bottle of water was shoved in my face and I opened it gratefully trying not to breathe in through my nose. The look of Texas chainsaw massacre was already imprinted on my brain and a second round was so un-fucking necessary. Plus I didn't want to believe that I was as bad as these two fuckers in some form. I wouldn't kill or do what they did to the women after, but I had done some pretty messed up shit over the years. Consensual yes, but now looking at where Bella had been kept maybe I should be more concerned about my sexual history.

"Thanks" I choked out as I put the cap back on the water bottle.

"No problem" Paul said with a chuckle.

"How can you stand it?" I asked.

"Maybe you should wait outside." Sam said but it was said more as an order than a suggestion.

"Yeah...I think that would be a good idea." I replied as I turned away and started heading back the way we came in.

I needed to get out of that place not only because of the smell, but also because I was damn sure my brain was about to come to a conclusion. A conclusion of how even if Bella survived this, if we survived this, the shit she went through in that room was going to put a huge fucking damper on us. I had my sexual demons and they were going to be a huge fucking problem. I hadn't been without them for years because it held back my temper. I needed it like water needed the rain. I hadn't survived without it, but she was no way going to be able to so that shit again. Vanilla was going to be her only choice when all this shit was said and done. Vanilla had never been an option so what the fuck was I going to do?

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