Disclaimer: SM owns everything Twilight I just use and abuse her character for my own pshycotic pleasure and to entertain you. Bwahahaha.

This took place before I posted Charlies POV. I was going to do this as an outtake/separate story, but it didn't happen. I decided (Edward and Sarah drove me insane until I caved) to finally publish the interview between my dear pre-reader Sarah and Edward. To say it was interesting to do this interview would be an understatement. The things I do for this story *shakes head* baffles me.

Edward was having an interesting day that started in the morning. I vented with Facebook posts, so you will see the actual posts in the BOLD writing when it gets to that part, just so you don't get confused lol. It is exactly what happened on that day. I mean it was just plain nuts. lol

I had many things to do and Edward was really riding me to get his story done. He wants Bella home and is very impatient because I'm actually not just skipping shit like he wants and moving fast through the story. After a few reviews, I had talked about doing an interview with him, to answer some people's questions. He agreed, but he forgot it was scheduled for this specific day.

Edward was having a pissy day, this particular morning, because he was giving me shit more than usual. I posted it on FB if ya were following you would have seen how my girlie Sarah was giving him a hard time by responding to my post. What you didn't see, was when she showed up for the scheduled interview and decided to give him more shit in person. a.k.a. piss Edward off interrogation…

I had to sit through an hour…hour of pissy Edward for this because Sarah was just well…Sarah lol. I love her lots, but she sure loooooves to give Edward shit and make my day difficult. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing their antics.

I also need to address a couple of reviews I've had. I do not have a posting schedule but I will finish this story. Here's what my chapters go through to get posted.

1. I write what is happening on my computer in short hand and gibberish.

2. I go back through it and fix it so it makes sense, because the shit that comes out of my head is quite scary at first.

3. Ask Edward his opinion, get yelled at and cursed because he doesn't like it. threaten to cut off any form of sex at all for the rest of the story and Sarah's constant presence in the house. Re-read story, fix mistakes, delete/add words/sentences for better plot and to placate Edward.

4. Send to Sarah for preview

5. Fix Sarah's suggestions

6. Let Edward read Sarah's changes, listen to him bitch and complain and yell about Sarah and how horrible she is for giving him shit, then fix the story.

7. Send story off to my beta Mandee for her editing

8. Fix all suggestions from beta

9. Resend to Sarah if necessary

10. Post chapter.

It is crazy the way my chapters get done and it takes time. I post as soon as it has gone through all the steps…that's why it takes longer sometimes. Sarah and Mandee are very busy people. They hurry as fast as they can but they also have RL things as well. So please be patient if it takes a while for chapters. We love you and will hurry as fast as we can.

This has not been Beta'd because it's just one of my every day occurrences with Edward.

Chapter 28: Interview (Edward, myself, and my Pre-reader Sarah)

September 6, 2012

Edward burst into my house like he owns the place and pops down on the couch.

"Hey Switz, Why aren't you writing the damn chapter already? It's not like I'm shutting the fuck up, anytime soon, so you can think about anything other than writing my shit down."

"I told you I have a lot to do today and I can't just be your beck and call girl Edward, and write when you feel like I should. I have other obligations. Why don't you go see Bella in the hospital I'm sure her tests are done?" I say with exasperation as I look for my car keys.

Edward pulls his hair in frustration as he glares at me.

"That's bullshit and you know it you're just trying to blow me off. She won't be done for a few hours. Don't plan on me shutting my ass up anytime soon either. I'm gonna drive you nuts in that damn pretty head until your sit your ass down and finish my story."

I roll my eyes knowing full well he hates that shit which causes him to glare at me.

"Don't tell me what to do or I'll write shit you won't like." I raise my eyebrow at him challengingly.

Edward jumps up from couch and shakes finger at me. "DON'T MAKE ME SPANK YOU BECUASE I FUCKIN WILL!" He yells through gritted teeth.

"Don't threaten me with a good time." I wink at him evilly and walk out the door. I can hear him cussing me the whole way to my car.

That's what happened that morning. I proceeded to post most of the situation on Facebook during my appointment because I was irritated with his ego. I arrive back home, because Sarah's on her way to do the interview, and find Edward sitting on my couch. His hair was completely crazy and he was barefoot in his white t-shirt and jeans. I had to resist the urge to drool.

"It's about fucking time you get back." He states matter-of-factly.

"Edward…for the love of all that is holy…will you please go find something to do besides bother me?" I throw my keys on the hall table and sit my purse on the desk.

Edward scowls at me. "I'm not leaving until you write what I have to say."

I was just about to tell him to go to the hospital again, when my phone went off. My lovely Sarah commented on the post. I couldn't help but giggle as I read what she wrote, of course making Edward ask "What the fuck is so funny?"

"It's Sarah…" I answer annoyed.

"The snarky chick who reads the story and shit?"

"Yes Edward…I posted on Facebook after I left and apparently she agrees with you about finishing the story." I tell him as I sit down on the couch to relax. No such luck.

"Why…what is she saying?" He asks as he nearly sits in my lap so he can see my phone.

"She says…'Why are you not listening to him you don't need sleep.' " I elbow him trying to get him to back out of my space.

"See even Sarah agrees." He says with a smirk.

"Oh shut up Edward." I huff because I just want to rest. He nearly climbs back into my lap trying to see what I reply.

Switz: "I have kids and he is just being a douche following me around pulling his hair and huffing." I post with a smirk of my own.

"You wrote me as a douche so stop bitching and I don't huff." He huffs.

Switz: "If he's not huffing he's cussing under his breath. I told him I'd get to it after lunch. Lol"

Sarah: "He can get pretty pushy can't he?! Maybe you need him to have a nightmare where his dick shrunk or something…that might shut him up."

Edward who was reading over my shoulder…well...see for yourself.

"Are you fucking kidding me? Who the hell does she think she is? Are you going to let her talk to me like that?" He screams.

"Quit reading over my shoulder Edward if you don't like it…go away." I giggle and slap at him but miss.

Switz: "Oh his ego can be a little overwhelming lol he's not too happy about your comment lol"

"I'm Edward fucking Cullen and my dick would still be big if it shrunk. You wouldn't be laughing out loud if I smacked you in the forehead with it Sarah." He yells at my phone and realizes I'm replying so he shuts up and reads over my shoulder…AGAIN!

Switz: "I think u pissed him off. Lol"

"No shit Sherlock." He replies and I elbow him in the ribs causing him to grunt.

Sarah: "That is ok…I actually prefer a pissed off Edward :-p tell him to stop teasing me…it is not NICE HEHE"

"Mother fucking cock sucker are you fucking kidding me? Who the hell does she think she is? Where does she live I'll show her a tease." He growls.

"Oh calm down Edward I'm not gonna tell ya where she lives you can talk to her at the interview." I roll my eyes getting an evil glare from him before it turns into confusion. I realize he has no clue what I'm talking about and I don't say shit. Lol.

Switz: "Oh thanks a lot now he's really cussing cuz I won't tell him where you live. Lol" I reply to Sarah and grab my laptop to prepare for the interview in five minutes.

"Fuck that…tell me where she lives and I'll give her a few answers." He huffs

"No." I sigh exasperated.

Edward flips me off and sits down on the couch, again, in a huff and folds his arms pouting.

"I don't fucking pout take that shit out." He says reading my now computer screen.

"No you're being a douche. Quit reading over my shoulder and leave me the hell alone. If ya want me to ever get done writing this shit and continue on with the next chapter….your HIGHNESS." I giggle and he growls.

Next thing I know there is a knock at the door. I get myself up off the couch, interrupting my writing that he won't shut up about me doing, and answer the door. I open it wide to a Sarah laughing hysterically and answering my post in person instead of on Facebook.

"He will get over it tell him he needs to put all that energy he is using right now to good use…like go back to the gym…"

Edward of course growls as he stands up from the couch and Sarah notices him after I wince. I know shit is about to get crazy and I move out of the line of fire.

"Tell him yourself." I open the door and Sarah comes in she waves but Edward just glares at her.

"Sarah…Edward…Edward…Sarah." I say quickly and go take my seat back on the couch. I pick up my laptop and get comfy so I can type as they talk. Sarah walks over to me and leans in toward my ear.

"Because you know how he let himself go." Sarah pretends to whisper, making Edward growl and I cringe.

"I'll fucking let myself go right on your damn face and then you won't talk so much shit." He says, standing, with his finger pointed at her.

"Edward!" I chastise, but it's more of a giggle. I cringe internally because I know Sarah isn't even warmed up yet. Apparently neither is Edward because he takes his shirt off and flexes.

"Oh great Sarah you pissed him off." I sigh and sit further back on the couch knowing this could be a while.

"Does this fucking look like I let myself fucking go?" he smacks his six-pack with his palm.

"My muscles are so tight you could bounce a God Damn ball of these fuckers. Edward Cullen does not…and I repeat does not do fucking flab!" He yells.

Sarah starts laughing which wouldn't have been nearly as bad except then she really pushed his buttons.

"Awe you are so cute Edward when you are upset." She pats his chest…actually pats his chest as she walks by and my eyes pop out of my skull as she adds "it is ok they will get bigger when you go back to the gym."

Edward and I have matching faces of shock as Sarah takes her seat in the recliner across from me. He cusses under his breath and starts walking away.

"Edward…come back she's just kidding." I give Sarah my best evil eye but she only rolls hers.

"I'm sorry Edward." She says placating and he huffs as he sits back down.

"Damn it…I don't fucking huff." He growls making Sarah giggle and getting her Edwards evil eye. This, of course shuts her up quickly, because that shit even scares me.

"Okay…Edward, Sarah has some questions are you ready to answer them?" I ask trying to move this shit along, because I really do want a nap. He shrugs and so Sarah starts her questioning taking it as a green light.

Sarah flips open her notebook and then asks, "I am sure you have noticed the weight/muscle loss."

Edward clenches his jaw. "Do you really want me to answer these fucking questions? You can see for yourself I'm not fucking flabby move on."

Sarah smile/gloats and then looks back at her notebook. "You want to take your team to the Super Bowl, don't you?"

"I'm going to fucking take them to the Super Bowl." Edward states matter-of-factly.

"So, what would happen to your team if you got injured because you were not taking care of yourself?" Sarah smirks.

Edward chuckles dryly. "They'd fucking lose the damn season and blow their shot at a fucking trophy without me."

Sarah leans forward and I know she's about to let lose. "Your ego is a little overbearing…you're only one normal man…have you ever thought about not being such an egotistical ass?"

Edward throws his hands up in the air. "I'm not egotistical…it's not my fucking fault people aren't' as awesome as me."

Sarah rolls her eyes in annoyance and Edward narrows his eyes at her. Sarah just raises a brow making Edward cross his arms across his chest and huff.

"I do not fucking huff!" he yells at me and I giggle.

"Isn't it true that she Miss Swan left your place of resident without letting you know where she was going and without protection?" Sarah asks as I type away their conversation on my computer.

"Yes." Edward growls exasperatedly like Sarah should already know the answer because she has been reading the story.

"Do you blame Miss. Swan for being taken?" Sarah asks sincerely and I pay closer attention because I want to know the answer too.

Edward glares at Sarah for a moment trying to intimidate her, but Sarah just raises her eyebrow again in challenge. Edward sighs and rubs his hand through his hair. "I do not huff or sigh." He glares at me and then answers her question.

"Yes and no…it was my damn fault for not telling her how much danger she was in, but she shouldn't have disregarded what me and Charlie were trying to do."

"Maybe if you weren't such a control freak and told her she wouldn't have run away." Sarah giggles getting her the bird from Edward before he…

"I swear to god Switz if you right 'huffs' one more time." Edward threatens me and I continue my sentence I was typing.

"Huffs." I stick my tongue out at him and he narrows his eyes at me.

"Would you like me to leave you two alone?" Sarah giggles, I blush as I shake my head no and Edward grunts in annoyance.

"What would you have changed the day that Miss Swan was taken?" Sarah asks and leans forward in her chair.

"I wouldn't have been such an asshole…I would have taken her up to my room and made love to her for hours…I had been fucking neglecting her like an asshole instead of being a good Dom and making sure to do my god damn job." Edward answers sincerely.

"Is that all you are to her is her Dom?" Sarah asks with a smirk.

"Seriously Sarah…for someone with such a smart mouth it's surprising how un-smart the head is that is attached." Edward growls in frustration.

Sarah giggles and I roll my eyes. I don't know why she must frustrate him.

"How do you feel now that Miss. Swan was found?" Sarah asks

"Fucking ecstatic and scared as shit too…the shit she is dealing with…I feel impotent in the fact I can't do shit to help her." Edward stands up and starts pacing and I snort as I realize he said impotent. I bite my cheek so I can control myself from stating such like a teenager. He looks at me and glares like he knows what I'm thinking, but I just smile at him and continue typing. I know if I say anything it will just piss Edward off to no end, because of his ego, unfortunately Sarah likes to piss Edward off because she thinks it's funny.

"Well, Edward you do realize the doctor can help you with being impotent right? The cause of impotence is the lack of blood flow to the penis. You really need to have your doctor check you out. You might have bad circulation. There are pills for this…like Viagra." Sarah smirks. I gasp and nearly drop the laptop on the floor. Edward has flames coming out of his ears, but it doesn't faze Sarah she just continues talking.

"You'll help her like you always do Edward…take the Viagra and you'll have to bulk up a bit though because there's no way you'll be able to carry her with that flab though." Sarah giggles and gets up to leave.

"Fuck you!" Edward yells and storms off into his man cave flipping the bird for good measure. I sigh knowing it's going to be forever before I get him out of there. I put my computer down and stand up to walk Sarah out.

"Thanks a lot." I sigh as I open the door.

Sarah giggles. "I couldn't help it…he's just so damn easy to goad."

"Yes but I have to deal with him…you don't." I state matter-of-factly and shut the door behind her. This is going to be soooo super I guess I'm writing Charlie's point of view for the next chapter. I think to myself as I save what I have knowing I'll have to finish it when Edwards in a better mood. I close my laptop and lay my ass down for a nap. I'm exhausted and the kids will be home from school in an hour and a half.

I have the next chapter completed it's in the editing stages. I'll post it as soon as I can. :)