The next morning found Rush and Helisma facing each other on one of the beds at Gull and Lantern, while Bull, Krem and Stitches stood around the bed, keeping silent watch in case anything went wrong. Rush felt slightly nervous, while the tranquil made opposite her was… perfectly tranquil.
Rush took a deep breath, "Are you ready, Helisma?"
"Yes, Rush." She stated in the same tone she used when she ordered breakfast.
'Well, at least I got her to stop calling me Knight-Enchanter. Progress, I guess.' Rush sighed to herself and mentally steeled herself. She only hoped this will work and it was not some fluke or ritual residue that disrupted the tranquility.
It was an incredible accident, that Rush even so much as thought about pulling Helisma along like an object when she Fade Stepped. It was a quick thought, something she barely thought about, before she grabbed the girl to pull her along the same way she did with her clothes and spirit blade.
Ironically, pulling her spirit blade along when she Fade Stepped was harder than taking the Tranquil with her. Fade truly considered the tranquil objects, not people. Yet once they touched Fade, the ritual was disturbed and their personality came back. Together with their magic, maybe? Still, there was something here, something she did not know. If only she could research it in detail…
She took a deep breath and touched Helisma's hands. Time to see if she can pull the tranquil with her into the Fade gain. She concentrated on the spell, without the need to move forward. There was no need to move physically; she only wanted to get into that state in between here and the raw Fade itself.
The air turned teal and Rush felt the familiar feeling of… weirdness. Here, yet not. Feelings just like hers, but at the same time, so very different. She held them both there, as long as she could until her hands hurt from the way Helisma clutched them in shock.
Wait. Shock?
Rush stopped casting and opened her eyes.
Helisma stared at her, desperately clutching her hands as if they were the only thing keeping her together. The look in her eyes was… devastating. A confused blend of raw terror, excitement, fear, joy, panic and who knew what else.
That's not at all like when she first 'woke' up.
Rush felt her eyes go wide. Did she… overdo it? Could something like that even happen?
It didn't matter at the moment. She pulled the girl… Helisma close and threw her arms around the tranquil's shaking frame. Helisma trembled for a second.
Then she laughed.
Helisma laughed and laughed until she started crying. Choked yells, shouts of excitement and cries of fear all mixed into one, stifled in Rush's arms as Rush held her tight and whispered into her hair, "It's all right, it's all right. Everything will be all right," over and over.
The men standing next to them were tense, but didn't try to interrupt.
Eventually, Helisma's cries quieted down. When there was nothing left but choked sobs, Rush slowly drew back. "Feel better?" she asked with a small, uncertain smile.
Helisma looked up at her with her bloodshot eyes, red from crying and smiled. A huge, happy smile with the force of a thousand suns. "Yes, I… Yes. I feel."
"Good. That's good." Rush released the breath she unconsciously held and smiled back.
"It's as if I felt fifteen years of feelings, all at once." Helisma laughed, and it still held the edge of hysteria in it. "That's right, isn't it? I feel fifteen years, all at once!"
Bull chose that moment to speak up, "Great. How long do you think it will last this time?"
Helisma startled and looked up… and up until her eyes met Bull's. She blinked a couple times, then gave him an uncertain smile. When Bull smiled back at her, she relaxed. Rush had to bite her lip to stop smiling. Yeah, Bull knew just how to present himself so that even a terrified ex-Tranquil mage stayed calm.
Then Helisma actually registered what he said. "W…wait, do you… do you think this will… that I will…" She swallowed and her eyes filled with tears again. "I don't want to be Tranquil again! Please! You can't ask…!"
"Hush, it will be alright," Rush soothed her, but didn't even try to deny it. The sadness in her eyes would have given her away anyway. Helisma started crying again, and it tore at her heart.
Rush closed her eyes and tried to give the girl at least something. "Your reaction right now is stronger, and lasts longer than the previous one did. Maybe this won't be forever, but it's progress. And once you get to live among mages again, they can Fade Step with you any time you need. Who knows, if you time it right and watch your own reactions, you could do it yourself."
Helisma's breathing hitched.
"Do you remember how to Fade Step?" she asked her gently and felt Helisma briefly hesitate, then nod against her shoulder. "Good. We will test and see if you got your magic back as well. If you did, you can do the spell any time you need. With a bit of effort, you may never fall into Tranquility again."
Helisma stayed quiet for a moment, then she laughed in happiness. It went on for a while, until she tired herself out. She lifted her face from Rush's shoulder, completely done in. "And what about… this?" She waved at herself. "I… have no control over myself anymore. Tranquility is awful, but at least I can live like that."
Rush narrowed her eyes in contemplation. "The effects fade gradually, right?" When Helisma nodded, she continued, "Then you will make really short, brief Fade Steps. Use it more often, in short bursts, and you will figure out the right time and strength to do it with, so you can have a normal life." 'No longer Tranquil, but not in hysterics either', she added silently to herself.
"Not to disturb you girls, but do you feel up to travelling?" Bull asked not unkindly. "We really need to finish this job."
Helisma stared at him for a moment, then nodded, "Yes, of course. I… I'd really like to see my father before the effects dissipate. If they do."
"Your father?" Rush hesitated, but then agreed anyway, "If he doesn't live too far off, we could make a small detour, I guess. Who is your father?"
Helisma looked at her in surprise, then barked with laughter. "You don't know? Of course you don't, he wouldn't admit out loud that he has an illegal mage child. Much less that the child was made tranquil." She snorted bitterly, then looked Rush in the eyes. "My father is Roderick Asignon, the Divine's Chancellor."
"You're shitting us!" Bull shouted in shock. Rush felt the same way. All of them stared at the girl kneeling on the bed and searched her face for any familiar features. They found none.
"I'm really not." She answered mischievously. Then she sobered. "I'm the daughter of Roderick Asignon and Hevara Derington, carrying my mother's name so my father won't be embroiled in scandal and lose his job over the shame of having a child out of wedlock, and with a Chantry Mother no less."
"Wait, Hevara? As in, Mother Hevara of Val Royeaux?" Rush couldn't believe it. The same woman that spent all her time attending soirées had a tranquil daughter? The one Rush protected as a Knight-Enchanter bodyguard? She never would have guessed. Even more incredible was the fact that she had Helisma with Roderick, though it did explain the coldness of their relationship if their daughter was a mage, and was then made tranquil.
"The one and the same," Helisma nodded with something approaching hatred in her eyes. "The woman who decided that having a tranquil daughter was better for her career than having a mage daughter."
Oh. "Did she… order them to…?" Rush couldn't even finish that sentence.
"Order? No." Helisma smiled bitterly again. "She merely had to mention to her templar 'friends' how terrified she was that a scary demon will tear her poor child apart once she steps foot into the Fade, and I wasn't even allowed to have a Harrowing, since there were such 'great concerns' about my ability to pass the test. I'm sure her recent promotion from Sister to Mother had nothing to do with that. Neither did the way I refused to give up my last name."
That… was some really nasty business. Yet Rush couldn't say she was surprised. Tales like these were unfortunately common at the Circle.
She couldn't help but compare their lives and situations. She knew just how dangerous it was to live at the Circle without a noble relative's protection. It was the same reason she was determined never to meet her own kin again, if she could help it - not after they left her at the Chantry to fend for herself. But at least they didn't press to have her made tranquil. "What about your father? Didn't he fight it?"
Helisma hugged herself and stared down at the bed. "I don't think he knew until after the fact. When he came to visit me and saw the brand on my forehead... I remember how he cried, and I…" She bowed her head. After a moment, she collected herself, "He used to come visit me at the Spire every month. Encouraged me to research animals, since I always loved playing with them, before my magic was discovered. And when the Mage Rebellion started, he gave me the position of a Chantry Archivist's assistant. He kept me safe." She finished in a whisper.
All the Chargers stayed silent to give her a moment. Rush didn't know what to think. All she knew of the Chancellor showed him as an abrasive, rude, hard man. To find out he cared for his daughter all those years, even after she was made tranquil… Despite herself, she felt her opinion of the man rise.
"Then we shall hurry and bring him the good news." Rush smiled for Helisma's sake and stood up. They will make their way back to Val Royeaux and to Roderick.
Rush was really curious how he will react to having his daughter back.
A/N: And this was my personal headcanon about why Roderick seems to hate both mages and templars so much. Having a reason for hatred doesn't make him a good person, but I felt there should be at least some explanation why that man seems to hate everyone. Contempt like that doesn't appear from nowhere - I bet there was a story in there that we never heard.
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