LEGEND OF ZELDA: Let's Be Silly!
Disclaimer: Hey, guess what! I don't own the Legend of Zelda! Nintendo does!
8.1 - (Mivichi)
Ganondorf's discomfort with having the body of a child, a strangely shaped head, and stranger family members - all of who reminded him of no one so much as that deluded fool who wished to be a fairy - melted away at what his father offered to him.
"And if I make your stars, then I will have the Triforce - er, the mark of your true heir?" he prodded his in-loop father for confirmation.
His father spun in the heavens and emitted a disturbingly rainbow-colored aura. "As We said, We have been holding onto it until the day you prove that You are not the sort of prince that would roll up candy to steal from babies. Your poor cousins had to put up with too much. You may earn Our respect by making stars that are: Magnificent, like Us. Shining, like Our Face. Beautiful, like Our wife. Brilliant, not like you."
Ganondorf grit his teeth and did not respond to that as he wished. "I will not disappoint you," he said instead.
Ganondorf's eternal hatred for Link and Zelda almost felt soothed. Finally! The world recognized who truly deserved the Triforce. Ganondorf had won it before, yes, but never had the process been arranged in his favor.
The hero always won - and now Ganondorf was the hero. He even had the green clothes to prove it.
First a cow, then a herd…
Buildings, clouds, continents…
The firmament itself could not withstand his might.
Ganondorf exulted in the power of his multicolored katamari. "Ha ha ha HA ha ha HA!" He spotted a new world with a rather familiar landscape just as he rolled it up. "Hyrule is mine, yet again!"
"Have I met your requirements, father?" Ganondorf demanded.
"You obviously enjoyed the tasks We assigned you," the King of All Cosmos said. He held out a hand. "Your job is complete. The Triforce is yours."
Ganondorf reached for it.
The King pulled it back slightly. "But…"
"Did I not earn it?" Ganondorf forced himself to speak civilly.
The King agreed, "You did. But We forgot something."
Ganondorf nearly cracked his teeth holding in a snarl. "What?"
"What is it, what is it," the King pondered, twisting himself into a circle. "Ah, yes, now We remember!"
The King paused.
"The loop is about to end."
Ganondorf's jaw dropped. He sputtered. "What the f-"
His sentence finished elsewhere.
8.2 - (Mivichi)
An Intersection of Artifacts
As a magical artifact loaded with the divine power of three goddesses of creation, the Triforce had long had some measure of sapience. It could not have looped otherwise.
That is not to say that it had a human mindset, whether that human was mortal or not. Ages came and went, and went and came. Sometimes another being touched it while it was whole. Other times it lay scattered in pieces against the world.
It could not care less if its 'body' were whole or not. That only mattered to the goddesses and the being eager for their power.
And all that the loops meant to it was that the ages would continue to come and go for even longer than expected. That should not have been an issue.
Unfortunately, fate had chosen to introduce a new element to the Sacred Realm where the majority of the Triforce rested.
The sword sitting next to it quivered, perhaps rejoicing in obtaining a captive audience. Even without a mouth, it spoke. Again. It had not stopped, and it kept on repeating. "My legend began in the 12th century-"
The Triforce shuddered. For the first time in its lengthy existence, its thoughts gained a greater coherence. 'Please, Goddesses, no.'
A bolt of power rained from the sky, striking the Triforce and ejecting it in pieces into the outside world.
'Gratitude.'
8.3
Link shuddered as he thrust his sword into Din's Flame. The fire seemed to dance and wrap around the blade, altering it slightly and infusing the blade with a faint glow. Then, a painfully-familiar, grating voice spoke up.
"Oh~yeah! That really hits the spot. Feel those impurities just burning away. Why, this reminds me of the time that the Lady of the Lake, now she was quite a looker. Anyway, so she had just claimed me back from Arthur, I think this was either the thirty-third or thirty-fourth time. Arthur was a guy then, kind of a shame, Arturia is super-hot. I get polished just thinking about her. You know, I..."
Link pondered, not for the first time this Loop, the merits of gouging out his own eardrums. It would hurt, but probably not as bad as listening to Caliburn's non-stop rambling.
8.4 - (KrisOverstreet)
Two swords lay side by side in the smithy, lit only by the cooling coals of the forge.
"You know," said one sword, "a lot of people get me confused with the Sword in the Stone. You know, 'he who pulls me from the stone shall be rightwise King of all Britain' and like that? Totally different sword. But sometimes I take on his job, you know? Especially when I visit the Hub world. Yeah, that was the worst Loop I've ever had. Wanna hear about it?"
The other sword could have spoken, had it felt a need, but chose not to.
"Right," Excalibur said. "So there I am with that engraving just above my hilts- and whoever did that must have either had a machine or a magnifying glass, because I was a letter opener. A frigging LETTER OPENER! There I am, whoever held me had a legitimate claim to the crown of the United Kingdom, and I spend thirty years as Richard Branson's goddamn LETTER OPENER!" If a sword could have shaken its head, Excalibur would have. Instead the sword managed to slide down a hair from where it lay propped against the wall. "So, you ever been to the Hub world?"
A holographic figure sprang from the crossbar of the Master Sword. "I have," Fi said, "but only as part of an operating system for certain useful devices. I was... not popular."
"How bad was it?" Excalibur asked. When Fi didn't immediately respond, he added, "It can't be that bad, can it?"
"Have you ever heard of something called... 'Clippy'?"
8.5 - (Mivichi)
An Intersection of Artifacts, Part 2
Excalibur grew thoughtful as he watched the Triforce blast off in a very literal way.
"Good show," he complemented, though not towards the Triforce. "I give it an 7.75 out of 10 for style. And you thought I could not do it."
Three fairy lights - one red, one blue, and one green - whirled down from the sky and circled around Excalibur. If anything was said, it was not aloud.
Excalibur chuckled. "Do I win the bet, or do I win the bet?"
The lights shifted again. They clustered together, occasionally moving as if peeking over each other to look at the sword, and then separated. They bobbed up and down.
"Fantastic! You won't regret adding to my legend, ladies. I look forward to working with you."
The lights glimmered dubiously before disappearing in a burst of golden light.
"I still have it," he praised himself.
8.6
Ganondorf sat at the edge of the crater formed by Link's technique. In one hand, he held a small bucket of popcorn, which he was slowly munching from as he watched the show. For a moment, he had been worried when Link pulled out that massive glowing sword. But then, he had managed to dodge out of the way, barely, and he just happened to have been standing between Link and the Lon Lon Ranch.
Ganondorf chuckled as he watched Link being chased by that annoying Malon. She was riding that horse that usually ferried Link around, and the Cucco Horde was following her, directed by her righteous anger. Ganondorf grinned. It truly was funny when he wasn't on the receiving end.
8.7 (6.7 continued.)
Zelda landed lightly as she descended from the tree she had climbed to get her bearings. She brushed off her loose pants, before she started to head north. From her Loop memories, and what she knew of the less changeable landmarks of Hyrule, she was in an outgrowth of the old Kokiri forest. Hyrule Field was to the north and east, though it was now called the Lonlon Plain. Zelda has spotted what appeared to be a road that looked to be passing through the forest towards the field. She would take that road and head up and across, to the city of Ordon. She clenched her fist, contained in the Gauntlet, and set off.
As she walked, Zelda continued to try and reach out to the Triforce, and to access her subspace pocket. From the story, it was obvious that the Triforce was in pieces, which was probably contributing to the difficulty in accessing it. But, it was strange. Even when she was Tetra and the Triforce lay scattered beneath the Great Sea, she could still reach out and access it. Her subspace pocket was likewise usually unaffected. Something else was happening, and she needed answers to find out what.
Zelda ducked low under a branch and stepped onto the road, startling the three Moblins that were lounging about in the shade of a tree. For a moment, the four just looked at each other, before, with screeching shouts, the Moblins charged towards Zelda. The two nearest her were wielding large spears, while the farther grunt was fumbling with a short bow. Before, Zelda has fled from the Moblins, being confused and unarmed. Now, however, she was not nearly as defenseless.
Zelda twisted, stepping quickly to the side, keeping the charging Moblins between her and the archer, and she raised her arm. The first thing she had done after leaving the Fairy Sanctuary was practice casting the Fairy Spark spell that the Fairy Topaz granted her. Light flowed out of the gem and across the lines of her gauntlet, before pooling in her open palm, forming a flickering ball of light. With a quick shout, she thrust her arm forward. The sphere flew, smacking into the chest of the nearest Moblin. With a cry, the Moblin sprawled backwards, tendrils of Light dancing across its limbs. The other Moblin charged, ignoring its fallen comrade, and behind it, the third Moblin fired an arrow. Zelda twisted into a quick back handspring, dodging the arrow and gaining distance from the Moblins.
As she regained her feet, she fired again, striking her first target just as it rose shakily to its feet. Once again it collapsed, but, this time, it lay still, before exploding into wisps of black smoke. Zelda sighed in relief, before smiling. These monsters were shadowborn creatures, which meant she didn't need to worry about holding back.
Monsters in Hyrule tended to come in three forms. The first were ordinary animals and creatures that were irritated or induced to attack, often by dark forces. They had their natural abilities, but were otherwise innocent creatures. The second were animals from the first category that had been changed by dark magics in someway. Most octoroks were examples of this. Occasionally, they could be purified, so it always saddened Zelda when she was forced to kill them, as they were as much victims as she was of their attacks. The third, however, were the shadowborn. They could take any form, but they were merely anger and hatred give shape by dark magic. They had no true feelings, they were not truly alive in the most basic sense. And that meant Zelda could let loose on them without regret.
The charging Moblin barely had time to react before Zelda had closed the distance between them. She sidestepped its thrust, and then grabbed the overly long spear and, with a twist, used it to knock the Moblin off balance. It fell hard on the ground, squealing, and Zelda brought her arm down in a palm strike, a sphere of Light leading the thrust. The force of the blow and the energy of the sphere instantly dispersed the Moblin, including the spear she was holding. Zelda quickly rolled to the side to avoid another arrow, but hissed lightly as it struck along the side of her leg. She raised her hand and cast another Fairy Spark. The Moblin squealed as the sphere crashed into its face, and it staggered back. Zelda rose while it was distracted, and hurled a follow-up Spark moments later, causing the archer to vanish in smoke like its fellows.
Zelda paused, catching her breath from the fight, before wincing and rubbing the side of her calf. Slowly, she called up a simple healing spell she had learned from that lovely purple unicorn, and she was glad to see that she could still access her other magical powers, even if her pocket was still out of reach. After tending to her leg, she straightened, and turned towards the north. Time to go find some answers.
Zelda pulled her thin cloak around her as she crept through one of the alleyways of Ordon. She had gained the cloak from a second band of Moblins. Apparently, one of them had stolen it from a farm they raided or something, because it had remained behind when they dispersed. Now, she was using it to blend in with the city, as her bright Sheikah outfit would certainly cause her to stand out.
She had been moving through the town, seeking any information about the monster attacks and any whisper about Hyrule and the Old Castle. Most of the gossip had been fairly worthless, but she had heard that a contingent of the city guard, large imposing armored soldiers that patrolled through the streets, had been seen leaving the city in the direction of the Old Castle ruin. Zelda hadn't been able to follow up with the rumor, but, for now, she was going to try and find a way to get into the castle and talk to the current King, Horatius.
Unfortunately, the Ordon Guards were really quite capable, and, unlike the Hyrulian Guards that Link laughingly ran circles around, the Ordon Guards were not adverse to using force against those they caught trying to enter the palace. Zelda had barely slipped away from them, and she was now following another piece of advice from Link.
"There is always a back way in." Zelda smiled as she spotted what she was looking for. A tree stood next to the palace wall, and, high on the wall, several vines twisted and tangled across each other. It would be quite a leap, but she was confident that she could make it. She glanced up and down the street, before hurriedly scaling the tree. One of the thicker branches actually extended straight towards the castle wall, giving her an excellent launch point, and she lightly stepped, one, two, LEAP!
She crashed into the wall, one of her arms looping around a length of vine, and the other scrambling to grab onto something. Her legs kicked out, and then her free hand caught a vine. Slowly, she caught her breath, before she started to pull herself up the wall. Link made this look so easy when he was scaling over the walls.
She arrived on the top of the wall without incident, and slowly she made her way over and down, slipping in through a door. As she crept down a passageway, she ran through her plan, and she felt like smacking herself. So, she was in the palace, but how was that supposed to get her an audience? The king didn't know her from a Goron, and the efficiency of the guards led her to think she would probably be tossed out or thrown in the dungeon before she could get out the first sentence. She sighed, then shook her head. She would find the king first, then worry about what came next afterwards.
She had just crossed over from the outer wall into the main castle when a massive crash caused her to leap three feet in the air and set her heart racing. The crash had come from the room she was just sneaking past, and seconds later, a somewhat familiar, if often unused, voice cried out, "Ah, fire, fire, it's on fire!" Without thinking, Zelda pulled open the door, to a truly odd sight.
Link, or at least, this time period's version of him stood, grasping his head and looking harried, an emotion that seemed out-of-place on his usually stoic face. In the middle of the floor, a large mechanical bird lay in pieces, one of its wings hanging off, and with flames dancing from the neck joint and head. Zelda quickly stepped forward, pulling off the dusty cloak and she quickly beat it against the burning owl, smothering the flames. Zelda turned, her eyebrow quirked and a laughing comment on her lips, when Link spoke.
"I thank you, my lady, but I must ask, who are you?"
"I..." Zelda froze, as she stared at Link's face. He...wasn't Awake. Zelda slumped slightly, before gathering herself. He may just Awaken later. In any case, "My name is Zelda."
Link nodded, before his attention landed upon her Gauntlet. "Are, are those Hylian Runes? Can you read them? Where did you find that? What-" but whatever else he was going to say was cut off by a knock at the door, which had swung shut behind Zelda.
"My Prince, are you alright? I heard a crash."
Link stumbled and blinked, looking off-balance, before he dashed over to the door. "I'm fine. Yes, just fine. The project I was working on just fell over. Nothing to worry about."
The voice on the other side of the door was silent for the moment. "Very well. Do try to be more careful though, my Prince. I won't live to see you take the throne if you insist on giving me heart-attacks."
Link sighed and nodded. "Yes, yes, I know, David. Thank you for all that you do."
"Of course, my Prince. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll turn in for the night."
"Yes, of course. Good night." Link sighed, before turning away from the door. Zelda started as she remembered that this Link was a stranger, in a strange time that she knew almost nothing about. Slowly he approached. "So, ah, your name is Zelda?"
Zelda nodded. "Yes. I, um, I'm looking for information on Hyrule. I was hoping to speak to King Horatius about what is known about Hyrule and about its fall."
Link shook his head. "That would not be a good idea. My father, er, he doesn't like talk about Hyrule, or the Dark Queen. He says we need to move forward, that the past is best left for scholars and the future belongs to kings." Link's voice had shifted, showing that he was reciting the argument mainly by rote.
"Ah. Well, I suppose I best go then."
Link looked up, waving his hands. "No, no. I mean, my father doesn't like Hyrule, but I love it. The tales of heroes and princesses, and fairies and magic, and all of it. It's amazing," he paused, before looking down. "Not like anything like that happens these days."
The room was silent for a moment, before they both moved to talk. "Do you know-""Would you mind-" They stopped, then laughed. Zelda waved her hand, and Link bowed, smiling, before he extended his hand. "Would you mind if I examined your gauntlet? I am trying to learn Hyrulian Runes, but the only place that I can really study them is the Old Palace, and it is closed off."
Zelda paused, before holding out her hand. Link took it and then leaned in, examining the lines and patterns on the gauntlet. "Facinating. The lines are shifting. That must be why the messages on the walls don't make sense. You have to read it as it changes to get the whole picture. So, if this line, that is fairy, and then it changes to focus, then heart, then...bullseye? That seems odd. Wait, it could be focus again, but, target of focus?"
Zelda realized that Link had pulled out a book and was paging through it as he examined the runes. She smiled. While this Link certainly seemed more cerebral than usual, seeing the intensity and focus as he strove to translate the symbols, she could see clearly that this was Link's reincarnation. Though, she paused. She had been calling him Link in her mind, but that might not actually be his name.
"While I appreciate your attention, I do not believe I caught your name, my Prince."
Link looked up, startled, before his eyes widened. "Oh, of course, forgive me my lady." He let her hand drop and bowed deeply. "I am Prince Link Temerius Seren de Ordon, Crown Prince of the Ordonian Empire."
Zelda smiled. This Link also was rather better mannered than her Link was most of the time. She then sighed. "It is a pleasure, but I am afraid I must take my leave. I seek to uncover the truth of Hyrule's fall, and for that, I must go to the Old Palace, if your father will not help me."
Link frowned, "My father may not, but I think I can." With that, Link darted over to a chest of drawers. He began frantically pulling items out of drawers, shoving them into a satchel or tossing them aside before spinning around. He had pulled out a cloak, which hung around his shoulders, and the small satchel was slung over one shoulder. He quickly darted past her, before slowly pulling open the door. He glanced up and down the corridor, before glancing back at her and waving her to follow him, then he vanished out the door. Zelda chuckled lightly as she did so, carefully pulling the door shut behind her.
8.8 - (barryc100588)
Ganon watched as Aizen was sealed by Urahara, disappointed in the man's performance. His Loop Memories had settled and he knew he was the one who had convinced Aizen to turn traitor this loop.
"I thought he'd have done better, having that Hogyoku thing. Ah well, it just means I have to clean up his mess, like usual for me." Ganon sighed and gripped his sword. "I may not have one of those Zanpakuto, but that shouldn't matter." With one last look at the globe, he broke apart into shadowy particles and disappeared.
Ichigo frowned as Urahara finished his work. "Somehow, I feel this ended too easily."
Black particles started floating around the area before coming together to form a body, which soon gained color. Ichigo gripped his sword, not having used his Ultimate attack to help defeat Aizen this time. "Who is that?"
Ganon laughed as he fully materialized. "You may call me Ganondorf. I've come to finish what Aizen started." He pulled out his sword, which glowed with an unnatural light, and tossed the sheath away.
"What kind of Zanpakuto is that?"
"This thing? It's no Zanpakuto, but it does have a sacred power that I turned to work for me." He laughed. "Now, have at you!"
8.9 - (Mivichi)
A Purple Gale
Vaati raised an eyebrow at all of the people panicking around him. He didn't see what the problem with the location was. It looked like ancient ruins to him, neither well-maintained or overly decayed. A little work would make them perfectly homey, especially if they had working sewers and a water supply.
His loop memories told him that this all was supposed to have been a game that just got an update. Right, and he was actually a hero, he thought sarcastically. If this was still a game, wouldn't it still have a menu? He focused on making it appear with his mind, sure that it would not.
It did. Vaati tried to work that out but failed. His loop memories suggested that looking through the menu would be wise, so he did. His equipment proved his appearance about matched how he looked in Hyrule, minus the purple skin: purple tunic, red shorts, laced sandals, purple cape. He even had the Minish Cap - apparently, it was a Phantasmal-class item, which meant he hadn't taken all of his fun from PKing other players.
Vaati's status page gave some more useful information: Elf, Sorcerer, level 90, with a subclass of Looper.
That last bit twigged his attention. He flipped over to the subclass menu. That had plenty of helpful tools. Deciding not to alarm the plebs, he left his EXP alone and instead activated all of his skills from the Hylian loops, plus a few of interest from the loop where Usagi had visited and stomped him flat.
All of those together gave him enough skill in magic to feel the essence of the world around him. That permitted Vaati to firmly throw away the idea that this world was some kind of illusion, not that he had thought it was beforehand. He went back to looking at the menu.
The Loopers here apparently got a help file. Vaati was jealous.
However, it didn't tell him anything about living in Theldesia. He cast an eye over the crowd. Only a few of the Adventurers were pulling themselves together. Most were in denial about what had happened to them. He dismissed them.
Vaati instead turned his gaze to the people manning the streetside marketplaces: the NPCs, the Landers. Most of them seemed entirely stoic, but a few had slowly dawning looks of confusion with a small helping of fear. He could work with that. Beginning to grin like a shark, Vaati walked to the closest one.
Behind a cart piled high with fruit, the mustached man sweat like he stood on the edge of a live volcano. Vaati leaned forward, casually taking a pear and biting into it. He relished the sweet, juicy crispness.
"O-one g-gold per p-pear, please," the vendor managed to stutter out.
Vaati hummed thoughtfully. "Why should I pay?"
The vendors eyes showed white all around the outside of the iris. "W-w-wha-"
Vaati gestured with the pair. The man followed the movement as if Vaati held a bomb. "Here's an important question: what are Adventurers usually like?"
The look the man gave Vaati wasn't promising. The vendor appeared close to fainting.
Vaati tried to give a more kindly smile that didn't show how amused he was. The stark terror of the vendor only increased. Vaati rolled his eyes. "You can answer truthfully. I swear I won't hurt you if it's insulting," he promised.
Vaati dug out his wallet and put five gold pieces on the counter in front of the vendor. The guy's eyes shot towards the coins. "In fact," Vaati said conspiratorially as he added five more coins, "the more useful information I get, the more I pay you."
The vendor's eyes flicked between Vaati and the coins. After digging a handkerchief out of a pocket, the vendor wiped the sweat off his brow. "You Adventurers are usually a soulless lot," the man said finally. "Like golems, almost; just bodies moving around, no emotions to be seen. You sort of talk to us, sometimes, but you never smile or shout or say anything but the exact things you always say. We know how we're supposed to respond. It's our job."
That was about what Vaati had expected. He added another five coins to the counter. "So, tell me what you saw the moment we came here."
The gold boosted the man's confidence via appeal to his greed. "It was the usual sort of transport spell that you lot use to return to the city. I've never seen so many Adventurers appear at once from the spell, but that was the case today. Don't know why, sir, but it was."
By the time Vaati finished questioning the man, Vaati had paid around a hundred gold and the man had calmed considerably.
Then, someone bumped into the back of Vaati. "Hey, look, the NPCs have food!" the Adventurer - Werecat, Cleric, level 90, Vaati catalogued - exclaimed as his hand closed around an apple. "We don't even have to pay. Free food!"
The vendor looked terrified again. Vaata became annoyed. The idiotic youth had undone all of Vaati's work at establishing a contact among the Landers. Worse, the youth failed to apologize for touching Vaati without his permission.
Keeping in mind the vendor's statements about the guard system, Vaati clamped his hand down around the Werecat's arm. The Werecat gave Vaati an unsettled glance. "What's the deal, man? It's just an NPC. It's not like they're alive or anything!"
"Learn some manners, cur," Vaati said coldly. "I am giving you time to contemplate your words."
With that, he turned the Werecat to stone. As Vaati hoped, a status effect from outside the standard system, an effect that only froze the target in place and did not negatively impact health, failed to summon the knight-automaton Guards.
"Sorry for the tacky decoration," Vaati told the Lander. "But I have found you to be more useful than this imbecile." Vaati turned enough to direct his speech to a wider audience and raise his voice. "If any other Adventurers steal from or harass the Landers," he announced, "I will deal with it personally. This city will be mine, and anyone residing in it is also mine. If you wish to challenge me, please do." He grinned in anticipation.
Surprisingly, no one challenged Vaati. They all started muttering to themselves and backed away. They were trying to match up the spell he had used to their gaming knowledge and failing horribly, and that unsettled them.
Vaati continued to smile as he walked unhesitantly to the guild center. Step 1, cow the populace, had begun. Step 2, subjugate the city, would run simultaneously. Step 3 was to rule however the heck he wanted.
Another Werecat padded next to Vaati. He raised his hand to threaten the level 90 Swashbuckler.
The Werecat held his hands up peaceably. "I'm not interested in a fight. I wanted to ask if you were a Looper, nya."
Vaati turned his face to pay closer attention to the Werecat, though he did not slow his walk. "Ah, are you native to this loop? The Anchor, perhaps?"
The Werecat shook his head. "I am only a native looper, nya. My name is Nyanta."
"Vaati," the Sorcerer introduced himself grudgingly. "Are you going to interfere?"
Nyanta smiled and shook his head again. "No, no, I think Susukino will do better under your hand than that of Demikas, judging by your actions thus far. Demikas, the head of the guild Brigandia - you are replacing Londark, his second in command - is much too fond of looting and pillaging for the city to prosper."
Vaati thought back to the times he had been the same. "Let me guess, a wandering hero on a quest comes to the city and puts him down."
Werecat faces were suited to looking smug. "You are very genre savvy, nya," Nyanta noted. "Or are you speaking from experience?"
Vaati smirked. "You'll have to guess."
"I would think a little of both would be probable for a Looper," said Nyanta.
Vaati flushed. He stopped, turned, and glared at Nyanta. "I am good at what I do, thank you! Just watch, the entire town will want me to be their overlord!"
"Of course, nya," said Nyanta genially as Vaati stormed off, fuming. Nyanta stayed doggedly at his heels.
"Do you have something to add?" Vaati grumbled. "You are very close to becoming a statue."
Nyanta smiled. "I was wondering if you needed a chef, nya." And then he explained why Vaati might want him along.
"I knew this place was too good to be true," Vaati complained, horrified of the thought of eating something that could only be praised as not tasting like Moblin cooking thanks to lacking any flavor at all. "Yes, you're hired, come along. Backstab me and I will make you into a statue - I am certain you can comprehend my methodology."
He frowned at what they saw as they rounded a corner. "Oh, look, another moron."
Both of them could see a group of Adventurers blocking their path. It looked like they were looting the overturned wagon of a peddler. The leader of the group was a burly man in light armor: Demikas, level 90, Human, Monk.
"Why worry about not being able to return home?" he roared as he hoisted a peasant girl roughly by the arm. "We've got food, power, immortality! We don't have anyone telling us what to do! The NPCs will do whatever we want them to do. They're not real people. They can't stop us. Are you with me?"
A few Adventurers looked horrified. Many cheered.
Vaati fired off a wind spell that boomed as it broke the sound barrier overhead. The crowd, silenced, turned to face him and moved away.
Demikas narrowed his eyes and dropped the peasant girl. He hopped off the wagon and swaggered down the road. "You got a problem with me, Vaati?" Demikas growled. "We're Brigandia! We PK and steal for fun! Why should it be any different here? We'll be born again in the cathedral no matter how much we die. Fall in line, asshole."
Vaati smiled a mad smile. Demikas stopped. "I will be the one in control here," said Vaati. "Both Landers and Adventurers will serve me. No one may harm what is mine. If you try, I will stop you."
Demikas grinned scarily. "I'd like to see you try."
Vaati snapped his fingers. He stalked past the statue of Demikas, and Nyanta followed unhurriedly.
Dressed rather casually in Earth-like clothes, the Enchanter Shiroe looked around at the clean and well-maintained streets of Susukino.
"I like what you've done with the place," he complimented Vaati while standing before Vaati's throne. The throne rested on a fancily carved and richly carpeted stone dais in the town center. Though rain fell overhead, it bounced off an invisible shield that covered the entire block.
Vaati rested his head on one hand propped up by an arm of the throne. "They came to see my point of view fairly quickly."
"Indeed," Shiroe agreed. "I saw the statues. It's a shame, though."
Vaati looked at the Anchor suspiciously through half-lidded eyes. "What is?"
"Oh, nothing, nothing…"
Vaati sat a little straighter, peeved at Shiroe dancing around the topic. "What?"
Shiroe waved it off. "Oh, you just seemed bored. I know a specific Fairy Ring nearby that will get you somewhere interesting if you step into it at the right time. But, no, of course you would rather stay here. There's paperwork that needs to be done, after all."
A pile of said paperwork sat stacked at Vaati's feet. When he glanced down at it, he had to withhold a shudder. He could not help but detest the necessity of having a crew of Scribes, Accountants, and Merchants to run the city on a day-to-day basis.
"Traveling to a new continent where no one here could contact you would certainly be an awful idea," Shiroe continued, "so I can't blame you for wanting to manage the day to day minutiae of your city instead."
If Vaati had to hear one more stupid complaint from his minions, he might snap.
Shiroe sagely nodded. "An entire loop spent politicking - that's good experience."
"As unsubtle as you were, you have made your point," Vaati snapped. He tapped the ground, and a circle of light sprang up around the throne. "I can be elsewhere and still control my city. I am up to any challenge you throw my way."
Anything would be better than another day spent sitting around doing nothing. It couldn't even be called a vacation! Ruling certainly was too much work when you worried about little things like keeping your followers happy.
He could have gone a more villainous route, but no, Vaati decided as he observed Shiroe's perfectly composed demeanor. If looping had taught him one thing, it was that challenging an experienced Anchor in their native loop brought nothing but trouble. One could never guess what sort of skill Anchors would call upon to stomp their opponents.
"So, where would you like me to go?"
Vaati and two others stood upon a long road through green, forested hills. The weather was bright, warm, and sunny, the complete opposite of Susukino's.
The girl in front of him adjusted her straw monk's hat and smiled brightly. "My name's Kanami! Want to travel with me?"
Vaati blinked. He was vaguely reminded of someone he had met before… Pinkie Pie, mixed with Rainbow Dash? The idea terrified him. "Ah-"
"Fantastic! Let's go!" she cheered, practically skipping down the road. "I want to see what's over that hill!"
Somewhat stunned by the charisma of a woman who was not even looping, Vaati started following before he could think about it. He glared at his feet as if they had betrayed him before throwing a questioning glance at the young-looking knight with whom she had been traveling - Elias Hackblade, if Vaati remembered correctly.
Elias Hackblade, the most powerful Ancient in Theldesia, shrugged as he too followed. "She does have that effect on people," he commiserated.
8.10 - (Detective Ethan Redfield)
Luffy in the Great Sea Part 1
Outset Island was wholly unremarkable in the great sea. It was self-sufficient with a few farms and several small families living together. But one day this small island would be remembered forever. It was the home of a young boy with an abnormal scar like birthmark under his left eye that would reshape the world.
"BIG BROTHER!"
There was nothing quite like awakening to the sound of the sea as it rolled against the sand and seasalt against his face. Unfortunately, it was ruined by his younger sister, Aryll, who was shouting at the top of her lungs right next to him trying to wake him up on his birthday. His eyes opened to Aryll gazing at him through a telescope from the ladder leading up to the watchtower, or Aryll's lookout as she liked calling it, "You're too noisy this early in the morning."
Aryll giggled, "It's already afternoon, don't you know?"
Luffy shrugged and did a quick one over on his memories. Apparently it was also his birthday in this universe so he lay back down, "My birthday means I can sleep in today."
The girl finished ascending the ladder and crouched over the asleep boy, "Too bad. That means all the meat we have back home will go to waste."
It was amazing how fast the boy awoke. Motivation that can only be brought on by food or danger to his friends spurred him forward. And then his reckless nature manifested as he threw himself over the edge of the lookout. He recognized his mistake immediately as the water rushed to greet him, but he countered, sending his arms flying to the other side of the island and pulling himself to his own house.
"Can't believe I got tricked by an unawake girl like that," Luffy muttered to himself. His 'grandmother' suited him up in a silly green outfit, promising that she'd make 'his' favorite soup for the evening when the town got together. As he made his way back to Aryll's Lookout, he pondered the seagulls overhead, wondering if he could pay someone would cook them if he caught them. But he chose to disregard that thought, since seagulls tasted nasty even when prepared by a master chef like Sanji.
Before climbing the ladder, he withdrew his strawhat from his subspace pocket, replacing the hat his grandma gave him. Aryll gave him a look, "Did grandma have you dress up in those? It seems they would be hot on you."
Luffy gave a big grin, "It's fine, since she's taken care of us for so long. It's the least I can do for her."
Aryll's smile reminded him of Vivi, and he started wondering if she'll start looping soon? Well, he could only hope. Aryll presented him with her telescope and asked him to try it out. Through it he saw a Rito mailman delivering letters...and then panicking and looking to the sky. It drew Luffy's gaze through the telescope, to see a massive bird overhead. Luffy's grin widened, "Ooh! Meat!"
He sent the telescope to his subspace pocket and drew his hands back, shocking Aryll, "Big brother, what...how are you-?"
And then his hands shot to the sky, grappling the Helmaroc King. The bird tried fighting back, but it was no use as Luffy dragged the bird and slammed it to the beach below headfirst, killing it on impact. Luffy paid no attention to his sister as he ran out, shouting meat the whole time and imagining the feast he would eat later. He never even noticed the approaching pirate ship in the distance.
Another pirate, one that had been held captive by the oversized bird, was just awakening as two people were bickering, the first being an old lady, "I can't fix that, Luffy. We don't have a big enough oven to roast it. Besides, how did you kill such a big bird?"
The other was male, "Just used my gum-gum fruit powers. And it's my birthday! I want to eat meat!"
Tetra's eyes opened to the image of the boy in green garb that seemed far too hot to wear during the summer months. The next thing she noticed was the Helmaroc King laying dead next to her, causing her to jump and scoot away. The surprised reaction drew the attention of Luffy and her grandmother, who greeted her warmly, "Yo! I'm Luffy, and someday I'll be King of the Pirates. Nice to meet you!"
Tetra tried processing the term "Pirate King," before her brain failed. Instead, she looked to him, then at the bird, then him while pointing at the bird, "I'm Captain Tetra of the Tetra Pirates. Did you kill this?"
Luffy nodded, "Yeah! Figured it would make a nice feast, but grandma won't fix it."
The grandma sighed, "And I told you, I'd fix it if I could, but it's too big!"
8.11 - (barryc100588)
Link had just rescued Tingle from the prison cell. he knew what was to come. He'd get the Tingle Tuner/Tingle Bottle and the map to Tingle Island and Tingle would be on his way.
"Kooloo Limpa, Become an Item!" Tingle intoned, and for Link, everything went pear-shaped. Instead of receiving the Tingle Tuner, Link became the Tingle Tuner, then everything faded to black.
Link lurched out of bed in shock, breathing heavily. He looked around wildly and patted himself before calming down.
"Just a dream. Thank the goddesses."
8.1 - Katamari Dragmire.
8.2 - Excalibur is Looping. And it is annoying.
8.3 - Spa for Swords: Being plunged into divine fires.
8.4 - This Loop may not accurately reflect Looping Excalibur's nature. He also might just be lying to have something to say.
8.5 - Excalibur also loves a good bet.
8.6 - Note: Biggoron Master Sword is not as great as it sounds.
8.7 - Zelda is used to breaking in and out of her own castle. She is a bit rusty with others.
8.8 - Even Aizen has been Hijacked by Ganondorf.
8.9 - Vaati loves loopholes, especially those that only he can exploit.
8.10 - Luffy's Wish for the Great Sea: More Pirates!
8.11 - Tingle loves to churn out nightmare fuel.