Ryōō Academy: 3:25 PM
Stepping into the tiled hallway, Kagami felt a strange sensation claw at her heart. It was like both anticipation had been imbued with both anxiety and relief, an apprehensive excitement. Hard to explain, but it translated roughly to anticipating the worst.. or the best.
She made her way around some stragglers- students who hadn't gone home yet- coming to a stop in front of the entrance to . Her destination wasn't the door nor the room within, but the blur of blue hair that charged at her as soon as she had approached.
"Kagami! You're okay! I thought you died, Kagamin, don't ever worry me like that again!"
"Hey! Be careful!"
Reacting instinctively to the sudden weight threatening to topple her over, Kagami yelped and put her hands on the girl's shoulders, pushing her away in annoyance. She overestimated the strength of the grip around her waist, unintentionally using enough force to send Konata backwards. The bluenette cried out in pain as she lost balance and tumbled to the ground, throwing her arms backwards to break her fall.
"Ah! Ouch.. It hurts.."
"K-Konata! Oh no, I'm sorry, are you okay?!"
Rushing to the fallen girl, Kagami leaned over her with a worried expression. Konata reached out and grabbed the proffered hand, allowing her taller friend to lift her back up to her feet.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Did I scare you?"
".. Oh, so you were faking. Seriously?"
"The only thing you hurt are my feelings! Do you know how painful it is to worry about someone, only to have them knock you down?"
If she wasn't grinning like a cat, the words might have actually made Kagami feel a little bad about having done that to her friend. That being said, the nonchalance and easygoing manner ruined Konata's chances of compassion.
"Maybe next time you shouldn't hug me like that. I only pushed you because I was startled.. it's not that I don't-"
"Oh, so that means you won't push me away if I hug you like this?"
With that, Konata slowly slid her arms around her friend, pulling her into a close and affectionate hug. Kagami reciprocated just as a tsundere should: blush, stuttered protest, reluctant surrender.
"N-no! I mean, of course I will! Get off me, there's people around!"
"But Kagamin, this hug is for when we're in public. I have a.. different.. one for when we're alone together!"
"Hey, stop, we do not have one of those! Please.. just.. okay? Ugh.. whatever.."
Giving in to the irrepressible otaku, Kagami sighed and relaxed her mind and body, delving halfway into a state of meditation. Doing this was the one thing that helped her clear away the carmine blush she had; It still left a tint of pink on her cheeks, but was much closer to her regular complexion.
"See, see, it's not so bad. You like it when I hug you, the only thing that stops you is you!"
"Don't get philosophical on me. Unless you want to stay here, let's go."
Konata nodded and confirmed her assent, but didn't release her friend from her vice grip. After she realized this, Kagami sighed and started to walk, waiting for the bluenette to fall into step beside her. It took a couple of difficult steps, but eventually they steadied themselves.
"We would be able to move a lot faster if you just let go of me."
"Let go? Of my Kagamin? That's a funny joke! Do you have another?"
"I wasn't joking! It's going to take us forever to get home at this pace!"
"More time to hug each other, then! Isn't that great, Kagami?"
"No, it's not!"
/-/
Izumi Household: 3:50 PM
"Hey dad, I'm home!" Konata announced, locking up the front door of the house.
"Oh, welcome back Konata." A voice responded from the other room, obviously her father's. Sojiro's smiling face appeared from behind the corner that led to the kitchen. "I'm just getting something to snack on right now. Go ahead and bring Kagami to bed- I mean, to your room. Yeah."
His words brought a light blush and slightly embarrassed grin to his daughter's face, and an even darker one to her friend's. Although he had immediately corrected himself, his original interpretation was clear.
"H-hey, we aren't like that, that.. Konata, tell your dad that we aren't in that kind of relationship!"
"Dad, we aren't in a relationship."
"If you say so, my daughter. Sorry if that made you uncomfortable Kagami, but you're probably used to it by now. I'd be surprised if you weren't, from all the time you spend with us Izumis!"
Two out of three people laughed, obviously finding merriment in something that the elderly man had said. Kagami deadpanned, not sharing the same sense of humor as the blue-haired family.
Konata, who was still wrapped around Kagami, thanked her father as she led her friend up the stairs to her room. Sojiro just nodded and smiled, accepting the gratitude with.. gratitude.
"Not in a relationship, but it looks like Konata's hugging her pretty tightly. Even better, Kagami doesn't seem to mind!"
A gentle tap and the door swung open, permitting Konata and Kagami into the former's room. For the first time in twenty minutes, the presence of Konata's arms around her vanished and Kagami blinked in surprise. She looked at where Konata had been, then behind her. Konata had released her grip to close the door, not locking it but making sure it was mostly closed.
"Oh yeah.. Konata always closes her door whenever I come over. Why was that again.. Something about her dad."
"Wow, you're so cute!" Konata grinned, enjoying the way Kagami immediately snapped out of her thoughts and stared at her with wide eyes.
"You say you don't like it when I hug you, but there you go looking all sad and stuff when I let go! Very dere today, very very!"
"Hey! I was just thinking! We both know that I'm indifferent to whether you hug me or not." She rolled her eyes and took a seat at the table in the center of the room, hoping that it was surprise, not longing, that she had felt when Konata had finally let go.
"Whatever you say, Ka-ga-min! Oh yeah, why were you so late? I forgot to ask you."
"You forgot? Isn't that one of the first questions you ask someone if you're worried about them?"
"Oh, worried? I wasn't worried about you."
Kagami put a hand on her forehead and groaned and muttered something indecipherable and most likely derogatory. Sensing another opening, Konata rushed over with a devious smile.
"Hey, Kagami! Remember what I was talking about earlier?"
"What?" Kagami mumbled, already bracing herself for one of the girl's many tricks and jabs. What she didn't expect was exactly what happened; A pair of arms snaked around her shoulders and a warm body was pressed against her back.
"Hey, what are you.." Although it hadn't even been a minute since she had last come into contact with the bluenette, Kagami felt an electrifying shock run up her spine at the touch.
Konata didn't respond, instead resting her full weight (which was not a lot) against the lilac-haired girl. The wildfire had spread from Kagami's face to her body heat, making her feel uncomfortably warm.
"Umm.. Konata.."
"O-Oh, that was just the hug I was talking about earlier! Just wanted to show you, haha!"
Instantly withdrawing her arms from around her friend, Konata walked over to her school bag resting against the wall to look through it excessively slowly, digging through items and pulling them out, then putting them back in and repeating the process. Eventually she turned around with a triumphant grin as she held up an envelope, marked with a red seal.
"Alright Kagami, this is the important event of the day! Do you have yours?"
"Obviously. It's not like they'd let me walk out without it.."
Konata dropped onto the cushion next to Kagami's, placing the letter on the table. Her smile was that of a cat's as she reached under the table cloth, pulling out a short knife with a brown handle.
"Konata, do you always keep a letter opener down there?"
"Nah, but today is special so I made sure to put it down there before today. Who's going first? Wanna flip a coin?"
"Actually, we should open them at the exact same time." Kagami voiced, getting a word of agreement- followed by a confused frown- from the older girl.
"But there's only one letter opener..?" She posed the most obvious flaw in the idea, but her eyes lit up as she grabbed the knife and cut her envelope open before handing it to Kagami, who took it with a nod.
Kagami quickly sliced open the envelope, fingering the edge of the paper inside and pulling it out. Her mouth went dry for a moment and a shudder racked her body. Kagami pinched the letter and took it out of the envelope, unfolding it and scanning the contents. It took her a couple seconds to find what she was looking for. Although she had already expected it, her heart dropped a couple inches when she read her results.
As if right on cue, her mind went back to the test she had taken a couple days ago. What had compelled her to mark the answers that she did? What was she thinking? Why couldn't she just have done her best and just done whatever she wanted? It's not like she was limited to only the level she tested out at; Wouldn't it have been perfectly fine to score high and choose something middle-tier?
"Hey, Kagamin? You're spacing out here. Did you get a perfect score or something?"
Konata reached over and placed a finger on a certain spot on Kagami's chest, pushing lightly inwards to get a reaction out of the tsundere.
"Hey, stop that! I'm not spaced out, I'm just.. yeah. Can I see yours?"
"Let's trade!"
Without waiting for a reply, Konata placed her letter in Kagami's hands and gently took her friend's letter from her yielding hands. Although she pretended to look over the letter, Konata's attention was riveted on her purple-haired friend. Kagami's perfect score could wait- it was the girl's reaction that she wanted to see.
Kagami blankly looked over the letter, skipping immediately to the important part. She had to read it a couple times to make sure that her eyes weren't deceiving her, but it wasn't just an illusion.
"K.. Konata.. You scored really high.. like.. really, really high.."
"Yeah, isn't that great? I figured this one was somewhat sorta important, so I actually studied a bit on my own for the last couple of days! Normally I just do the night before so I don't get anything like this, but I guess I really do limit myself, heheh.."
"Uh huh.. yeah.."
While the initial surprise had been thoroughly satisfying, there was something to be desired about the mood that was currently emanating from the twin-tailed girl. Konata could practically feel the dejection and lack of enthusiasm surrounding Kagami. The reason for this would become clear once she read the letter that had been sent to her friend.
"Hold on a minute.. lemme see that.." Grabbing her own letter in her right hand, Konata put them next to each other and alternated between the two. A piece of the puzzle slotted in, and the picture was enough to temporarily silence the otaku.
".. Wait.. Waaaaiiiit.." Konata got her voice back, but she used it pensively and there was an obvious confusion in her tone.
"O-oh, haha! You did better than me, not bad! I'm not jealous or anything, just.. really surprised, you know?" Kagami hurried, hoping that she didn't seem envious of her friend's abnormal score.
"Kagamin, did you fail on purpose?"
As usual, Konata was straight to the point. Kagami stared at her, stunned at how fast the girl had come to that conclusion.
"Well, I didn't fail.."
"But look! You did so.. under your standards! You score higher on homework assignments! What's going on?"
"Hey, I wasn't doing so well that day, you can't blame me!"
"You weren't sick and you weren't tired. I know because all four of us went to that cake buffet after school, and you were laughing and eating like the rest of us. Seriously, what happened? Isn't it your goal to go to Tokyo for college? What you've been working towards for most of your life?"
"Look, I don't know!" Kagami snapped, more out of internal conflict than actual annoyance. "Cut me some slack, so what that I didn't do well!"
"Kagami! What the hell was that?!" Genuinely angry now, Konata tossed the paper onto the table and turned her body to fully face her friend.
"Do you really mean that? So what that I didn't do well? You've been trying to get into Tokyo University for practically your entire educational career! Don't you think you're acting a little bit like me right now?! I'm supposed to be the one who doesn't care about her life! You should be the one going to college! Not me, I don't want to go! I wanted you to get into college, everybody you know wanted you to get an education and a degree and a good job! Miyuki and Tsukasa and your family and me and my family too! Even the people you don't know but they know you, they wanted and expected you to do really well and to do things that they can't! You wanted that too, so why did you waste your only damn chance?!"
Konata stopped for a moment and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. Her face was flushed red and her shoulders were shaking. When she opened her mouth to continue, she had visibly calmed down. Even though she spoke not nearly as many words as she had previously, the next two questions she asked had just as much, if not more, of an impact.
"Why did you do this? Why did you let your emotions stop you from getting into the place you've wanted to be?"
"W-wha? My emotions.. How did you know..?"
"You think I don't notice things, Kagami? The only stuff that ever troubles you are the things that go on inside your heart and that brain of yours. I've seen you when you're sick, I know how you are! You wouldn't let a cold stop you from doing something."
"..."
There hadn't been a chance for Kagami to respond to the cobalt-haired girl's anger, and if there was she would've missed it due to her being speechless throughout the whole thing.
"She's never gotten this angry before.. Konata's never angry at all! She's getting mad over this.. over my not doing so well.."
Kagami still hadn't processed why she had done it, yet Konata had seen through to her heart immediately. Her emotions. She had stopped herself from doing high. It was she who had purposely skipped questions and guessed here and there.
"I.. Konata.. You.." She stuttered, her voice failing her and only managing to get out three words.
"Me?" Konata gaped. She couldn't trust her ears- It had to be a mistake, a misunderstanding. "Because of me?"
It originally was a misunderstanding. Kagami hadn't meant what Konata had thought she did, but something stopped the purple-haired girl from making a correction. Maybe it was her heart. Maybe it was nervousness. Maybe it was the veil forming in Konata's emerald eyes and the tears that threatened to fall. It sent a pang of sadness into the tsundere's heart, and suddenly she knew exactly what had compelled her the day of the exam. She had been afraid to do well on the test and progress farther in life for this very reason- seeing Konata in such a state of despair and unhappiness.
"K-Kagami! Why.. why did you? You.. you're not serious.. right? This is just a joke? Trick? Misunderstanding? You were just confused, you didn't mean that, right?!"
"No.. I meant it. Konata-" She confirmed, about to explain when she was cut off by the most painful sobbing she had ever heard.
"No! No! This is all wrong, all of it!" She was openly crying now. Her voice was punctuated by tears and plenty of emotions: regret, anger, and guilt.
"You were supposed to really good on the exam and go to college! We were all helping you get there, but you just gave it all up for no reason.. I even studied so I could get into Tokyo with you, but now what's the point? Why should I go to college if you aren't going to be there? I'm not the one planning out my life.. Hell, I don't even know what I'm gonna do.. I was just gonna follow you until you finally get tired of having me around.."
Konata's voice had been reduced to barely above a whisper. She was a book of feelings: the anger, the frustration, the grief in every tear drop that fell from her eyes.
Every single word that came out of her mouth was dripping with self-detriment. The strong emotional barrier that she had built up over the years was crumbling with every word she uttered as the reality caught up to her, visions and thoughts of being all alone for the rest of whatever life she possessed.
With tears welling in her eyes, Kagami felt pangs of sorrow strike at her heart. Seeing her best friend like this was incredibly painful; It wasn't just Konata who was starting to blame herself. If she kept listening to the girl crush herself with the weight of her own feelings, she'd also break down and then what use would she be?
It was her duty to make Konata feel better- Not just as a friend, nor a best friend for that matter. The feelings that were swimming around in her heart right now, they were feelings of unbreakable attachment and a desire to see this girl's smile.
Konata was pulled into a warm embrace. She tensed up momentarily, but it melted away as her emotions took its place and let her cry her heart out on the shoulder of the girl holding her. Time passed by as they sat in silence, holding each other and allowing their feelings to escape, reaching out to each other before returning to their places in their hearts.
"Konata, I'm sorry. I didn't know that you cared this much about me.. You did a pretty good job of hiding it, you know?" Kagami smiled a bittersweet smile. "If I had noticed sooner, I would've said something and we could've avoided all of this mess."
"I don't want you to do this to yourself Konata.. Stop blaming you, stop blaming yourself for everything. You didn't do anything wrong- If anything, you've done nothing but be sweet and thoughtful. All those little things you do for people, you never expect anything in return. I'm so glad that I have someone like you around, someone who cares so much about the people around her."
Konata gradually calmed down as the quiet yet steady voice of the younger girl reached her ears. No longer was she feeling guilt over the issue, thanks to her friend's heartfelt words. Konata didn't say anything as Kagami continued to speak.
"I thought I was doing the right thing, when I took that test. I thought it would be fine if I settled for something lower, because it wasn't the end of the world to not reach my goal. It was just an excuse, Konata.. I wanted to be with you, and I thought that I had to give up on my dreams to get that. I was willing to do it, so I took the chance and hoped for the best." She smiled ruefully. "Guess I went about the wrong way of doing that, huh?"
".. Yeah.. you made a terrible choice, you know?" Konata's expression matched Kagami's, and while it was a sad smile full of regret and loss, it still had traces of hope and happiness.
"I know, I know.. It was pretty bad. But now, I've realized that you're probably all I need, Konata. I think.. As long as I'm with you, all of this will turn out right. We can make this work." That sounded pretty romantic, and Kagami knew it as soon as the words left her mouth.
"Well, uh, and everybody else.."
"I'll be with you forever, Kagami! For however long you want me around, I'll be by your side!" Konata surprised both Kagami and herself with her confidence, but she grinned right after.
"Was that a proposal?" Kagami grinned along with her potential partner. All the pain from before was gone, replaced by an endearment to the otaku that she'd never felt before.
"I love y-" It slipped out before Konata could check them, and the blush coloring her cheeks darkened several hues of red. She couldn't take it back now, but a sudden fear spiked in her consciousness as she contemplated the thought of being pushed away after everything that had happened, not just today but for years.
Her fear was irrational, and Konata knew this when Kagami placed a hand on her chin and lifted her head, brushing the bangs out of her face with a small but radiant smile playing on her lips. In that brief moment before her eyes closed, emerald met sapphire and she saw the answer that she had wanted- but never expected.
~End